Mermaids first offered this 'buffet of flesh' as a special event on Halloween night this year. And now they have scheduled their second "buffet" to occur on Saturday December 13th.

Myself and some monger friends of mine have asked the guys at Mermaids for additional details not appearing on their promotional flyer.

Supposedly the $99 fee covers basic citas with their entire lineup for the ten hours of the event. It also covers the use of their massage rooms for sex sessions with their massage girls.

Someone who attended the Halloween buffet said there were a little more than 30 chicas in attendance who were all available and willing fuck objects for approximately 40 mongers that took turns with the chicas. He told my quasi wingman that the Halloween event had about a half dozen flacas, a half dozen gordas, but the majority of chicas were average in weight (for Tijuana).

You may not bring in your own food or drinks (Don't know how they will deal with mongers that have special diets / restrictions). A person at Mermaids said that food and beverages will be for sale inside of Mermaids. I realize that partially conflicts with the information on the flyer saying they have no food.

The chicas may ask for tips, but no requirements for paying the chicas extra will occur at the event. Expect to tip generously if you and the chica agree on "extras" beyond regular covered service.

Citas are limited to 20 minutes each and you may not repeat with any chica. The event will end at 4 AM or whenever the monger leaves the premises (i.e. no in and out privileges).

Presale tickets cost $99 and $120 on the day of the event.

My quasi-wingman and another monger buddy of mine gave one of the Mermaid barkers a grilling to extract more details regarding this upcoming chica "buffet".

They confirmed (as correct) all the information I provided in my earlier post made 3 days ago.
Additionally they toured the facility, including seeing one of the massage rooms.

I've never been upstairs in Mermaids myself, and I thought it would be some upstairs hallway with closet sized rooms containing nothing but wobbly massage tables. But I was pleasantly surprised when QW reported to me that they were adequately sized rooms equipped with a small regular bed (maybe twin size?) and a full bath including shower.

My other friend asked the barker if his chicas would be eco-friendly during the event, and was advised that the chicas would be using condoms. Frankly I thought that was sort of a dumb question, and the barker said what he had to say to the general public.
IMHO something like this is always best discussed in the room.

The one real useful tidbit mi amigo got was that at the start of each 20 minute cita the monger has to choose to receive EITHER a blow job or a fuck session or a massage, NO COMBO CITAS!

I thought this was an odd rule.
I would think that a good strategy for this rule would be to ask every chica for a blow job.
That would work for me because I can always enjoy a descent bj of any time length.
And if the chica got tired of sucking my wienie with the foul tasting brand of condoms that I use after just 4 minutes... I could give her a big smile and tell her I don't want any damn massage!

I think this is a great marketing idea, except I don't see how it can be profitable. I don't see how they can pay the chicas any more than $20 per client and make money. I am not sure if they can make money at $20 per client. Figure the house may take $10 or $15 of each entry fee and they would be the only winners....well and the clients.

I don't think the buffet was a financial success for Mermaids, unless the owners and managers kept 100% of the money from ticket sales (which is possible). I bought ticket #11 on November 30th. A buddy of mine bought ticket #15 the day before the event and I saw a picture of ticket #16 that was bought the day of the event. During the first few hours of the event barkers were still trying to sell tickets to the buffet, but at some point, maybe before the middle of the buffet, Mermaids switched gears and started barking in prospects and offering their regular everyday promotion of asking $40 for an hour massage with a chica selected from a line-up.

Based on the number of mongers in attendance at the event I doubt they even sold 10 buffet tickets on the day of the event. Because it wasn't crowded, It was easy for me during the first three hours to bring up four chicas. Then the brakes were applied to me and other buffet members and it took unreasonably long periods to get access to any of their eight massage rooms to fuck. There were a million indications that they were falsely making room hard to get.

The event stated about 35 minutes late and it was abruptly ended nearly an hour early. For folks like me that couldn't seem to get a room during the second half, the event was essentially closed down hours early/premature.

I am just finishing up a very lengthy and detailed report on the Mermaids buffet event and will post it here either later today or tomorrow.

Please note that the following trip report IS NOT to be copied and reposted to any public forum or other website or printed materials without my authorization. I freely contribute the following trip report to WorldSexGuide.com, ClubHombre.com and InternationalSexGuide.info. only at this time.

The often stated truths on Tijuana monger boards about LZ is to avoid places that have english speaking barkers. If they need english speaking barkers to bring in business (often from newbies who don't know any better) then they typically are not worth going into. Sure, as always in LZ, you might have that rare great experience even in rip-off places, but those experiences are far outnumbered by legions of mongers who feel they got ripped off when they Look back at their experiences in clip joints.

So the moment I heard about this "All you can eat buffet" being held by Mermaids I was amused by their proposed event. I knew that they couldn't, well, or more certainly they wouldn't, be eager & willing to deliver all the girls that I could run through in ten hours for just $99!

First let me describe the layout of Mermaids. From the outside Mermaids has two entrances located on either side of the tiny but tasty Viejo Lobo hole-in-the-wall restaurant. If you enter through the east entrance you will see a you-shaped stairway leading up to Who-knows-what and a curtain that has their bar behind it. The bar has small tables & chairs, some built-in padded seating along most of the perimeter, a long bar covering most of the back wall and a small stage with a 6 1/2 foot stripper pole. Yes, you read right, the stripper pole is less than seven feet tall! Even the short chicas can't really climb it without hitting their heads on the building support beam the top of the pole is attached to. Consequently all pole dancing I saw that evening were chicas grabbing the bar at or above their heads and just spinning to the ground. There is also a small alcove that can seat about 8 to 10 people next to the bar.

The west entrance leads to a medium sized lobby that has the same padded built-in seating along two of the lobby walls. This lobby also Has a you-shaped stairway leading up to eight rooms on the second level. They have a small desk at the bottom of lobby's staircase. Their is another you-shaped stairway leading up to a third level. I don't know what is on the third level. I never saw anyone using the stairway leading to the third level except for the one time a chica used that stairway to ditch me. There is a long hallway running behind Viejo Lobo with a jag in it that connects the bar to the lobby. At the jag on one side is the men's and ladies banos and at the other side of the jag is a door that I never saw opened. The bar can seat somewhere between 80 to 100 people, the west lobby looked like it could hold only about 30 to 35 people. Traditionally Mermaids uses the lobby to conduct their line-ups for barked-in prospective clients.

The buffet was supposed to start at 6 PM, so I arrive at Mermaids socially late at 6:10 PM. My quasi wingman (QW) was waiting outside of Mermaids per our plan. He was not going for the $99 buffet, but he was curious as to how pretty the chicas would be. Our plan was to have QW hang around as a prospective client as he checked out the place for as long as he was allowed to. My initial role was to act like the buddy that was trying to get QW to pull the plug and buy a $99 ticket and join me for a night of unending plentiful chica fucking. But at first we were left cooling our heels on the sidewalk because the Mermaids staff didn't have their act together. Mermaids was still setting up and their guys told us the buffet would be open and running shortly.

I met two other mongers / buffet members waiting outside of Mermaids. One guy was a friend of QW, he looked young & fit, maybe around 40 years old and he must not have been a very experienced monger. He was certainly a nice guy, who was there repeating the event because he attended the first Mermaid's buffet that was recently held on Halloween night. He gave QW, and thus me, some good inside intel from the earlier event. I didn't talk to him much at all during the buffet. He seemed to be having a really good time as we passed each other during the event.

The other monger brother looked like he was closer to my age (mid fifties) but was much better looking than I am, and fit (unlike me). I found out that he posts on another mongering board under the handle "mujeriego". Mujeriego was pleased to meet me and said I didn't look anything like what he thought I would. He also told me that he read a lot of my posts and enjoyed reading them. This year I've met about 30 to 40 mongers from these hooker boards and it was really nice to run across and finally meet my second fan. While waiting to get inside we compared ticket stubs. I bought my ticket on November 30th and it was ticket #11. Mujeriego had bought his ticket the prior day (December 12th) and it was ticket #14 or 15. So we figured this event had very few pre-sold tickets. They certainly were still selling it hard as I was solicited by two different barkers on the other side of Coahila Ave. , once just before and again just after I ate two tacos in Tacos de Sherry across the street from Mermaids. Something I found amusing was that the second barker was verbally announcing that the buffet's price was $99. Forty minutes later, when QW was heading out out of Mermaid's bar we confirmed that they were asking the flyer's publicized day-of-event higher price of $120. The barker verbally quoting a $99 entrance fee was probably doing the typical Mermaid's massage parlor mislead shuffle where a $99 promise of an entry fee morphs into $120 after the first five twenty dollar bills are handed over.

At a few minutes after 6:30 we were finally allowed into the joint and issued wrist bands in the lobby. Then we were taken through the hallway into the bar where they had only five chicas in the bar. That was not so bad since there were only five or six customers and QW posing as a possible customer. We were told that many more girls were coming in soon by this diminutive mesero that was wearing a Santa hat over his nearly shaved head, so for the rest of the report I will refer to him as "Dim Santa". Dim Santa told us that if we wanted to take a girl arriba, just tell him and it would happen. So I immediately pointed to the one chica that was pole dancing and told Dim Santa that I wanted to take her up right now. He said OK, but that I needed to wait until she finished dancing.

This first chica went by the name Ruby and she spoke English. As she left the dance floor she asked me to buy her a ficha, but I declined and said I just wanted to go upstairs. We went to the lobby where they took down her name and my wristband number onto a laptop and we were off to the races. In the room Ruby immediately suggested that I tip her $20 for the best time ever. I countered her with an offer of 50 pesos and some regalo. That seemed to work for her, although she never took her top off. The cita was quite spirited. It began with her offering her pussy for DATY, and since I was probably her first client of the past hour I obliged and enjoyed her fake moaning. Then it was a short BBBJ for me with a little more suckie time as she put on the house condom. The sex was very good and nasty and I could have popped if I wanted. But instead I regrettably decided to save my leche for later. This was probably the second biggest mistake of the evening that I made since my citas would not get any better than this. The knock came in mid stroke, and might have been close to 5 minutes early. I immediately stopped and pulled out.

As I was dressing, Ruby shopped the plentiful selection of regalo. She appeared to genuinely like the regalo items and thanked me for them and the 50 p note. Her expression of appreciation appeared to be modest, but genuine, without a trace of sarcasm. I went into this event very unsure if my tip counter offer (if the chicas were asking for too much) to the masseuses should be 50 p or 100 p. After her reaction I decided to repeat again at 50 p. Now that I've had the benefit of reading posts on a few monger boards that were made after the event a lot of those posts were speculating that it was possible the chicas might have been paid nothing by the house for their arriba services. I realize that I should have been giving each chica 100 p and even more to the ones that decided to perform well for me in the room.

Because things had gone so well overall for the first cita, and I realized that I was probably going to need to fuck some of the less appealing girls if there really was going to be an opportunity to fuck the entire collection. Even though an outcome that good was beyond reasonable belief, a monger has to position himself so that a better-than-expected result could occur. So I decided to now take up a second to third tier girl up for a quick turnaround to complete cita #2. I returned to the bar and took less than two seconds to make my second chica selection. I didn't have to look around for Dim Santa, since he seemed to appear out of nowhere when I returned to the bar and he had something to tell me. Dim Santa said that all I needed to do was give him a "teep" and I could take any girl up that I wanted. I thought to myself 'FUCK THIS GUY'. He seems to be one of just three or four guys in the place that was not one of the pair of meseros working that evening or one of the team of outside barkers. So he's high enough up to be paid well by the bar for this event and the fact that I need to go to him, instead of just directly going up to the chica is just this guys forced insertion into the process to make him rich in tips from the event. So I ignored his in-my-face demand for a tip and only pointed out my second chica selection to him Sans propina, and without a beaming smile, Dim Santa fetched my second masseuse of the night. Right away we were heading through the hall to the lobby. We checked in with the young lady at the laptop and were quickly in the room. My second chica was named Veronica and no sooner had the door closed to the room when she too was soliciting a $20 "tip". She was clearly not pleased by my counter offer of 50 p plus regalo and asked to see what kind of regalo I had. So I opened up my back pack to show her and she was not impressed. She then took her top off, kept her tiny skirt and panties on and told me I was only getting a massage. From her I really didn't get a traditional massage, but instead it was more like a topless table dance as she plopped her overweight body on me and moved the bare minimum.

Veronica had such a bad attitude, unappealing fat (although you chubby chasers would disagree) poor touch that I wasn't even getting hard despite the nice set of tits she at least let me fondle. That's all that occurred for the 20 minute cita and at the end I found myself wishing that it was this cita, and not my first, that got the early knock. When it was over she dressed in 20 seconds, waited for me to reach into the backpack for her 50 p note and took a pass on accepting any regalo. I think that might have been only the second time in hundreds and hundreds of citas I've had in LZ where the chica passed on receiving some regalo. If a great, not just memorable, time at this event was important to me, I would have drastically changed game plans at this point. Fortunately I wasn't expecting a great time, so no change in my MO was needed unless I wanted to throw away money.

I wanted to get rid of the memory of Veronica ASAP so it was time for yet another quick run up the stairs. After just a minute or two in the bar I pointed out #3 to Dim Santa and we were heading up the stairs in no time at all. Chica #3's name was Roxy and she seemed to me as if she was fairly new to this line if work. She didn't solicit a tip from me at the beginning of the session nor the end. She asked me if I wanted a massage, a blow job or to fuck. I chose the blow job but unfortunately her sucking force was too gentle for a CBJ.

Over the years I've learned the words in spanish to get a chica to suck softer if her blow job is too hard for my liking. But shit, seems I never before wanted a girl to suck me harder, so I've never learned how to give the instruction for that en espanol. She did seem to be trying hard enough, even if she was not sucking nearly hard enough. Props to her since she stay at it the entire time. Roxy even made a good effort at the end by letting me toss the condom away as she almost finished me by hand. I was getting close to cumming when the knock came. I had two different pockets of my backpack filled only with regalo, one of the two pockets had better items. She never ask me for a tip and seemed genuinely pleased with what I offered to give her. Maybe not so much with the 50 p, but she acted all excited to receive the two regalo items she selected. I figured that I was less than excited by Veronica's CBJ because nearly all the blow jobs I get these days are sin condom. Still I was concerned about how unexcited both the big head and little head were during the cita with no pops so far. I decided to sit my ass down in the bar, have a beer and a 1/3 nibble off of a viagra pill and kill a little time. I had been running at a good pace so far at the buffet and would have been meeting my best realistic estimates for the evening if we had not gotten a late start. I noticed the bar was a little bit more full now, so it was time for me to take a little head count.

At that time there happened to be an equal amount of guys and girls in the bar, 15 chicas and 15 customers, although only 4 or 5 of the participants were actually having ficha drinks with chicas. I would conduct four or five other body counts during the evening. At my highest headcount the bar was holding 19 customers. It is possible that I was upstairs when the crowd in the bar peaked, but chances are that my headcounts were fairly representative of the crowd size for this event. The highest chica count was 17, but when I made some of my counts I couldn't always see how many people were in the alcove by the bar. Even though I never saw as many as 20 chicas at once, there were definitely some girls that were only there at the beginning, only a few others that appeared only later in the evening, and a good portion of chicas that seemed to be there solidly working for all or most of the buffet event. They probably did meet, or came real close to meeting, the advertised promise of having 30 different masseuses at the buffet. Having enough available chicas at the event was not the problem, it was how they began handling the assignment of rooms well before the event was half over that was the huge problem that developed and I could see it was intentionally done by the massage parlor's management.

For those guys who want to know the overall attractiveness of the Mermaids chicas, I saw one "10" among their chicas. Hard graders of course could never award her or anyone they meet in person a grade higher than "9". She was a blonde of what seemed to be a natural shade (or professional bleaching) with big boobs on a tight slender body. She was unmatched in looks by the other chicas, because at the next level tier resided about a half dozen 7's & 8's. The balance of the mix were evenly distributed 4's through 6's. Maybe I'm being a little generous as I'm sure other critics would have found their share of 2's and 3's, but I didn't find any of the chicas present at the buffet to be butt ugly, and that's a great compliment to make towards any procurer of flesh in LZ.

From the very beginnings of the event the organizers were adamant that we weren't supposed to sit in the lobby, but instead always hang out in the bar. So as I sat in the bar nursing my beer I spotted a blonde chica that I thought was attractive. She was not the "10" I spoke of in the prior paragraph, but instead one of the "7's or 8's" and her name was Rachel. Turns out Rachel was just as bitchy as you can imagine a blonde "8" in LZ would be. Up in the room she asks for a $20 tip before the door even closed. When I told Rachel what I figured I'd be giving her at sessions end she shook her head and groaned that we would be fucking only. She removed only her panties and small skirt and sat down on the bed in an upright position and spread her legs. When I didn't instantly grow rock hard at her barely x-rated pin-up pose, she gestured to me as if to indicate that I, and my hands alone, would now need to be taking full responsibility for getting me erect. In La Zona I have never had a chica that refused to touch both me AND my junk, and believe me, over the years I've had my share of lame street girl sessions. As I unsuccessfully tried to get myself even a little hard, Rachel took pity on me and for a minute or two actually leaned her body against mine. I guess she was trying for a humanitarian award!

I never got hard with Rachel and was thanking god when the knock finally came. As she bent down to pick up her panties she suggested to me that maybe I'm rushing things & should slow down and relax in the bar for a while and maybe have a couple of drinks. I felt like giving her nothing, but instead handed her 50 p and told her she could have one regalo item. I only showed her the less desirable half of the regalo items. At first she seemed to be looking at the collection of regalo items with disdain. Then she started picking through them. In the end she took forever to seemingly decide on her one regalo item. And then when she finally selected that one final item and held it up in one hand (I think it was a pair of slippers), she then pulled two more regalo items from the pile with her other hand and placed all three of them on the bed close behind her and said thanks while flashing a great big fat smile at me.

Back two weeks ago when I bought my ticket to the event my QW was told by a barker that in the room we would be given the choice of a blow job, fuck session, or a massage, but no combination of those activities for the 20 minute citas. From my experiences the night of the buffet, this was generally not what I received most of the time. Some chicas gave me what I wanted or asked for, and others like Rachel provided me with only with her contribution towards our mutual disappointment. Her effort was so bad and cold, that I didn't even get hard in 20 minutes with her, despite her overall physical attractiveness. Mujereigo had a better time with Rachel.

So I decided to take Rachel's (chica #4 for me that night) advice to heart and slow it down even more. I sat back with a beer in the bar for about an hour at one time I just wandered over to the lobby, but was shooed back into the bar. That made me even more curious and the next time there was a flurry of activity heading over to the lobby I tagged behind to watch. What I saw was the massage parlor conducting a typical Mermaids line up for a potential customer. I saw them doing this during the first hour of the buffet as they were trying to sell more buffet tickets. But this was different. I heard the pitch and they had now switched over and gone back to selling their regular $40 massages. It made sense to me since who would want to pay $120 for the remaining bones from a 10-hour buffet with pigs like me eating away at now for close to four hours?

Back in the bar my interest was drawn to a chica that carried far too many pounds to normally be a target of mine, but I was definitely here to do things and girls that I don't typically do, and she was definitely it. I saw from my brief visits to the lobby that room waits were increasing, so I knew I needed to pick someone and get my name back in the queue as someone waiting for a room. As this young chica was pole dancing in the bar I noticed her youthful exuberance. I also noticed her well formed youthful see sized melons as they were nearly plopping out from her top as she spun her ample ass around the dance pole. I went into my pocket holding singles and eventually pulled out three singles (along with some moths) and tucked into her panties during two songs. I told Dim Santa that I was ready to take her for my fifth bride of the evening, but Dim said there was now a back up and brief wait for the rooms. He said we would be upstairs soon and suggested I buy the young girl who knew no english a drink, which I did from one of the two guys I saw working that evening as meseros.

She didn't rush things and we took a long time in finishing our respective drinks. Her name was something that I could not seem to pronounce, even after three or four attempts. I don't even remember what it sounded like, so in this report she will simply be chica #5. I checked with the young lady who was still manning the desk at the bottom of the lobby's stairs and she cannot, or would not, tell me nor the other two mongers who were asking the same question: Exactly when our rooms would be available.

During the brief time I was away from the chica that had finally finished her ficha I saw them pull in a new client prospect and 7 or 8 chicas were pulled from bar to do a lineup. The mongering prospect quickly selected a girl from the line up and he took her up immediately after paying the barker $40 in cash. The event wasn't yet half way over, but it was quickly approaching the midpoint. Apparently Mermaids had already changed over from trying to sell $99 buffet tickets and moved into its regular mode of aggressively selling $40 massages to anybody that was walking near their facility and willing to listen to their sales pitch.

After geting nowhere with the chica handling the room assignments, and sitting a whle longer with chica #5 sin ficha, I talked a little while with Dim Santa about the unprecedented delays in getting a room. It had now been more than an hour wait to go up with #5. Dim Santa passed me back to the lady with the computer in the lobby by the stairs. She sat me down on the large bench in the lobby and said they were trying to accommodate everyone regarding the rooms. She said that I had already been up four times and they were trying to let people up that were going in for their first or second time. I asked her "So I can't go up at all because I have been up four times already? She denied that as the truth. I asked "So are you giving priority to men that just arrived in the last hour or two, and that I have to wait until they are ready for their fifth girl before I can take up my fifth? She denied they were giving priority to late arrivals and further denied that any priority was being given to others ahead of me. So I asked "Why then did it matter that I had already taken up four chicas?" as she walked away from me in frustration and went back to tinkering around with her laptop.

At this point another new paying monger prospect was whisked into the lobby from outside. As I began heading down the hallway back to the bar I run up against seven chicas walking in the opposite direction because they were being called into the lobby from the bar to perform another line-up. It would have been eight chicas except that as I finally reentered the bar I got there just in time to stop my chica from cCatching up and joining in the lineup. Instead we returned to our former table. During the next four minutes I brushed off three or four offers back to back to back to back like rapid fire from the two guys working the bar to buy my girl another ficha. I kept saying no and that we we were going up in just a minute.

Since that line up ended only a minute after I had decided to return to the bar and sit sin ficha with my current gal, those seven girls had returned to the bar. They basically sat in three groups of chicas. About another eight or so mongers were sitting mostly by themselves or in pairs and another five to seven mongers that were activly ficha-ing chicas in the bar. After my fourth decline to buy a ficha in four minutes I decided to pull away from the annoying broken record. I told my chica a little white lie. I said to her that now is about time that they said the room would be ready for us and we should go wait in the lobby so we can go right up. Fortunately dshe was agreeable with me and went along. Every five minutes or less we were directed to return to the bar, but my chica, like me, didn't see any point in returning to the bar where there would be no ficha buying. The same was true for two more couples that came out to the lobby.

Those two other couples had been waiting a long time for a room. The men complained to room assignment lady and they joined us to sit and wait on the lobby's perimeter benches. We all were now waiting for our rooms to be ready and just blowing off repeated requests to move our asses back into the bar. My guess is that we all mutually figured out the most expeditious way for us to get our long awaited rooms was to insist on remaining in the place management didn't want us to hangout out at. And we were right because at one point they quickly got around to sending each of us right up nearly all at once. It would have been a tremendous coincidence if these three couples were all also sequentially listed on some waiting list on the female clerk's computer.

Up in the room #5 was an absolute sweetheart. Perhaps she sensed that all the crap about getting the room had me a little on edge and tired from fighting with her bosses. She was the only chica to go completely sin ropa as she wasn't dressed like most of the other Mermaid masseuses. She was trying very hard to get me going, even though as I recall I didn't get a blow job from her. Damn I was having trouble getting hard after that first cita where I uncharacteristically held back my leche. Eventually I stood up next to the bed and slapped my flaccid covered member against #5's pussy until it got hard, and then fucked her for the remainder of the session, which by now was less than 5 minutes of dick in pussy time. But it wasn't her fault, it was mine. Chica #5 also seemed genuinely charmed by the numerous choices of regalo of which she got two. #5 displayed no negative, but instead a seemingly positive attitude about there being a 50 p note given.

If I was wondering if the crew at Mermaids was trying to prevent my fifth cita, there became no doubt that they were actively working hard to prevent me from having a sixth one. Its downright comical to go over all the shit that was pulled in my quest for #6. Before and after. Chica #5, as well as earlier in the evening, I got the chance to sit down and compare notes with mujereigo and the younger monger that's a friend of QW. Mujereigo knew about the difficulty ticket holders were having in getting available rooms and he also spotted the unfichaed girls periodically leaving the bar to perform lineups in the lobby. We even followed the girls into the lobby during one of these lineup excursions to observe.

When I came down after cita #5 I saw that there was one big change going on. They now had a paper list of buffet ticket holders that were waiting on available rooms upstairs. This new paper list was being held and managed by this tall Mermaids official that gave his name as Alex. This was a welcome change since you could now actually see your name on that list and how close you were to liftoff. It was on notebook paper, and maybe about 15 names filled up the top half of the paper, with only one or two names scratched off when I first saw it. I immediately selected a new chica, told Dim Santa about my choice. DS spoke to the girl for about a minute and then he told me to go see Alex and get my name put on the waiting list because there was a short wait for rooms. My name was placed on the list with eight or nine ahead of mine that had not been scratched off the list when their room became available. There were eight or nine names ahead of mine. With just eight rooms on the second floor, I figured my wait time would likely be more than 20 minutes, but surely less than 40 since more than a dozen rooms should turn in 40 minutes.

I then sat in the bar with or near the other male mongers rather than spend money on fichas. After a little more than an hour I checked on the list and was shocked that I was still four names away! Even if a couple of the rooms were sold to new clients for hour long massages, the remaining six rooms should have turned over more than just four or five 20 minute buffet clients in more than an hour. Something smelled fishy. So I went back to the bar and tried again to pull that "let's go to the lobby cause our room is just about ready" ploy. She get up and walks down the connecting hallway, but stops and asks me to wait while she uses the banos. I wait for her in the hallway and occasionally peek my head into the lobby to check with Alex on how I was progressing on the wait list that he was holding.

By the time my name was just one away I had been standing in that hallway for twenty minutes. No one else had gone in or out of that bathroom and I figured I'd been ditched. I hustled back into the bar and told Dim Santa that I couldn't find my girl. My room would be the next room available, and could I take up this other chica Instead? Dim Santa said no problem and he went to my replacement chica and talked to her for about a minute. Funny how he only seemed to talk to any other chica at the buffet for two seconds yet he has these long conversations now with my latest selections. My replacement chica gets up and accompanies me to the base of the stairs. They take my wristband number, as usual, and we are cleared to go upstairs. As we reach the second level, replacement chica tells me that she needs to go up to the third floor for just a moment, and I should wait for her there, which I did for the next 15 MINUTES. During the time I waited for my replacement girl I only saw three couples enter the massage rooms. I only saw two couples leave. Basically I waited up there with the pair of 200 pound cleaning women who were just standing around in the hallway with me. When the second exiting couple left their room, I timed the cleaning ladies at just over one minute to clean the room.

I gave up on my replacement chica and returned to the bar. I briefly tell mujeriego about how the chicas are ditching me and that Dim Santa is probably poisoning the well when he talks to the chica as I try to take them up. I explained to Dim Santa that I lost my replacement chica and asked if I could take a replacement for my replacement chica. I was told to go ahead and I quickly selected replacement chica #2, whom I would later learn went by the name Diana (I think). Dim Santa gives his one minute informational talk to Diana and then she gets up and heads with me to speak with Alex, who is now standing in the hallway. Replacement chica #2/ Diana says something to Alex and then Alex explains to me in english that Diana was enjoying fisha drinks with a gentleman, but the gentleman had to run out for just a minute to go out and use an ATM. Alex said that Diana had to go back to the bar and wait for the gentlemen to come back and buy her more drinks.

Diana returns to the bar and takes a seat on the perimeter bench of the bar right next to mujeriego. Before I can go to Dim Santa and discuss my selection of replacement chica #3 I see Diana and mujeriego get up and start heading into the hallway leading to Eric and the lobby. I think to myself, "oh no she's not! And I jump up and get a little of mujereigo's ear. I tell him that his chica is one that just ditched me under the false pretense that she was obligated to resume. Ficha drinking with another customer. All three of us approach Alex in the hallway, right in front of the bathrooms. I point out to Alex that this is the chica who less than five minutes ago said she had to return to the bar to be further fichaed. Mujereigo takes Diana off to the side, explains that he is my amigo and asks the chica if there was some reason she didn't want to go up with me since I had asked her first? The chica said she was not opposed to going up with me. Mujereigo had done me a MAJOR SOLID and if I had known at the time that he had only taken three girls up before Diana, I would not have asked for this favor. But I'm glad that he did because it was great to do another end run around Dim Santa.

So mujereigo and I just stared at Alex and told him that I should be the one going up first with Diana. After pondering the situation for a minute or so, Alex conceded to our request and I was allowed to go upstairs first with Diana. Diana turned out to be a below average provider, very passive and sort of a dead fish. She seemed to be fairly new to the business. Mermaids seemed to have a good amount of newer providers at this event. I found Diana hard to read as to whether she was OK with the 50 p and regalos tip. I felt better when after mujereigo had his cita with Diana he told me that she told him that she really liked the sandals she got as regalo.

As I wrote earlier in this report, I now think I should have been doubling the cash portion of my tips to chicas to 100 pesos instead of 50 p. My fucking evening was OVER, but I was not to discover that for another two hours. I selected another chica and got placed back on the waiting list for a room when it was 1:28 AM. I was told the wait would be about an hour. I figured that even if it took 90 minutes, that would get me in the room by 3:00 AM For a finale.

I briefly sat in the bar and had another beer, but by 1:45 AM I decided to sit in the lobby and wait the remaining 40 minutes out there. They had long ago given up on trying to shoo me out of the lobby when I came out there to observe. From time to time Alex would reassure me that he was getting closer to sending me up again as I sat in the lobby. But for the next 90 minutes I was gaining more and more company out in the lobby. One by one more buffet customers were entering the lobby and checking on their progress in getting a room. During that 90 minutes I saw the Mermaids barkers Run a couple more line-ups for new potential clients. Those two new customers went up right away when they made their line-up selections. What I was no longer seeing was a lot of buffet attendees going either up or coming down the stairways leading to the eight massage rooms.

In 90 minutes I think I saw only five or six buffet client couples going up or down. It was a dead zone. If just half of the rooms were in use by buffet customers I should have been able to see 12 to 15 citas starting and ending.

If all the rooms were in use (except for the two new hour-long citas) the number of citas starting and ending should have been close to 20 over that 90 minute period. Clearly they were playing games regarding room availability. Twice I saw mongers who were part of the buffet talk to Victor or Alex at the base of the stairs and agree to pay $40 to "avoid" the lengthy wait for rooms. A few minutes after 3:00 AM someone came through the lobby and said there was going to be an announcement. Victor walks into the lobby.

By all appearances that night, Victor seemed to be a manager. All night long Victor had been walking around with an earplug in one ear that dangled a beaded antenna long enough to almost touch his shoulders. Victor had been walking in and out of the lobby a lot during these final two or three scheduled hours of the event. And occasionally he had made a comment to various mongers that the event was scheduled to end at 3 AM. I saw him make that comment at least twice to different mongers, and the mongers always corrected him and said it was supposed to end at 4 AM. So with a fairly large group of mongers now milling in the lobby, Victor makes his announcement: "The event is now over and ended". This got widespread groans from the crowd. At least two guys objected and said no, this is supposed to run until 4 AM and they further complained that they had been buying girls fichas right up till then while being promised for more than half an hour that their rooms would soon be available. I even threw out a comment that was ignored by Victor. I said "Hey I've been waiting over 90 minutes here for a room. If we are going to get short-timed and lose over two hours maybe you should refund all of us $20?

Victor just looked at us all. Acted as if he was being told something via his earplug, and said "I'm getting the word from upstairs that THE EVENT IS OVER! If there is a girl you want to take upstairs, we can only get you a room at this time for the standard $40 SINCE THE EVENT HAS ENDED! I looked at the time on my cellphone and it was 3:17 AM! I took a quick head count and counted ten angry mongers standing and sitting in the lobby! And that's not counting a few buffet guys, like mujereigo that had already left Mermaids due to the long waits for rooms. Guys grumbled at Victor and another Mermaids guy who was standing in the lobby for a while, but mostly they grumbled among themselves.

No buffet customers left right away. They at first seemed like they wanted to stay and argue with the crappy managers that just kept shrugging their shoulders and saying there was nothing they could do because the bosses upstairs said it was over now. Nobody jumped up to hand these thieves $40 and take their next selections upstairs. After five minutes two guys gave up and left, a few minutes later another dude gave up and left. Minutes later two more guys left, leaving just me and four other dudes in the lobby. I did a quick walk into the bar looking for Alex or Dim Santa, but neither of these guys were there, in fact I don't think I saw either Alex or DS in the lobby during the last half hour I was sitting there. They just seemed to have disappeared like so many of my selected chicas during the second half of the event!

When I left at 3:31 AM there were still four unhappy mongers milling around the lobby. I went to the Eduardo to crash. In the morning, just before noon checkout, I had a failed negotiation with Wendy at the Eduardo, so I took in Stone Cold Carla for a repeat session (my only other session with SCC was eight years ago). With Stone Cold I enjoyed a con ropa, fully covered suck & fuck for 250p and had an enormous release.

I extensively read my first Tijuana board months before I ever set foot in Tijuana's La Zona for my first time in October 2014. It was evident to me that the pricing structure of having sex with street girls vs. sex with bar girls had predictable results and outcomes and reasonable trade-offs. The other obvious thing to me, from reading the boards first, was that the massage-parlor model, as it is run by people like the operators of Mermaids... is almost always a bad deal comparatively. Consequently I never paid for a cita or anything else at Mermaids during my ten years on mongering. With posts and stories I've heard from other mongers time after time
they almost always say that they were pulled into Mermaids by their aggressive, english-speaking barkers when they were newbies on their first or second trip to La Zona. Typical story is that they modestly overpaid, had an overall OK to good time, but never planned to or actually did return to Mermaids again in their mongering activities.

We all know their come-on from the Mermaid barkers on the streets: $40 for the room and a girl "masseuse" for an hour. Inside they do the lineup. You can either take the girl up right away and negotiate in the room, or you buy her a ficha ladydrink and get acquainted and negotiate and confirm terms of the dealio.

The obvious disadvantage of the Mermaids way of doing things in LZ is large upfront fee of $40. If you strike a reasonable deal with the chica, that $40 room cost makes the overall costs of going to Mermaids non-competitively priced for a
cita just about everywhere else in La Zona. And if you and the "masseuse" cannot come to terms, you get the world's worst massage, and you're out $40 and an hour taken from your vacation in LZ.

The Mermaids buffet was IMHO a rip off in general and Mermaids didn't even try to meet their promoted promise of offering an "all you can eat" chica buffet. They were clearly planning to limit every participate to just a hand full of citas, regardless of whether you went along with the ficha fucking and the solicits for tip from the male gatekeepers in charge or not. At the event I was probably among the tightest people with my pesos, yet I still spent the equivalent of $50 bucks combined from both currencies during the duration of the event.

The only advantage a lightly drinking, lightly tipping and mostly non-fischa buying guest like myself had was that they couldn't throw me
out of the bar for not spending money, which would likely happen at any regular LZ bar. No LZ bars let you hang out in it for hours while not spending any money for extended periods. That was probably the biggest management challenge for the operators since I saw about 4 to 8 other guys that were not buying much at all in the bar. The event was also shortchanged on time because it started more than 30 minutes late and it was ended well before 4:00 AM over the complaints of a lobby full of prepaid customers. No one attending were given anywhere near 10 hours of all you can do chicas as the advertisement claimed. But why would you expect anything more from one of LZ's most notorious venue operators?

I knew that Mermaids was probably going to try to run the buffet as a ficha fucking main event, since there was probably not other obvious customary or legitimate ways for the parlor owner to extract additional money from the buffet's captive audience of mongers. If I was going to play along with how the management was likely going to steer me, I'd be buying four or five fichas for each chica, spend at least two hours in the bar drinking between each cita, and either get drunk and tap out, or stay sober while the bar was still going to try to keep me downstairs for timeouts while unrelentlessly pushing me to buy ladydrinks... thus ensuring me of a maximum of four to five citas. I heard the record at the first buffet was set by one guy who went up just six times.

I figured it would soon become wildly amusing to see how they were going to deal with me if I didn't go for a lot of fichas, or even any all if I could, while trying to run their chicas up and down the arriba train in express mode. Surely they've been around the block many more laps than I have, so on their home turf I figured my chances of being allowed to run my game over theirs was less than slim or none.

But in La Zona when the irresistable force meets the immovable object, some amusement is likely to ensue. Despite all the immeasrable cheap fun I am getting from my walker regulars these days in LZ, I still wanted to try something new. And the idea of trying to fuck a bunch of chicas that normally cost more than a mil to fuck in the room for short citas at a total cost of somewhere between 200p and 300p a head to me seemed like something appealing and maybe even right up my alley. In the two weeks before the event I joked with my quasi wingman and other mongers that my goal was to bang the 20 skinniest of the 30 chicas. But I always knew that would face roadblocks and cockblocks that probably wouldn't allow me to sample even 10.

However I knew I was headed into a snake's den for this little one-night novelty (and possibly trick) event.

In conclusion:
It seemed if you were not willing to pay them $40 for a fucking room during the last 2 to 3 hours, the buffet shut down early in the evening. They played all kinds of shit on me after I ran up four chicas in the first 3 hours of the event, up until then everything was OK..

They wouldn't let me get to #5 until I made things VERY DIFFICULT for them. Then I got permanently shut down and could only get to #6 because I got EXCEPTIONAL HELP from mujeriego.

If guys reading this report suggest that if I went more along with the program of buying multiple fichas and tipping each chica $20 that solicited that size propina, then I would have had a better time and been able to take up more chicas... we will simply agree to disagree. Mermaids gamed the event to attempt to limit everyone to no more than 5 chicas. I pay about a dozen different walkers 150p a session for unlimited BBFS services and no strict time limits. I'm not about to tip a masseuse $16.50 extra than my intended tip just to get some nonspecific promise of better service from the bitchier half of the chicas I took up. My options in LZ for good service are immense, so I am not about to drop an extra $200 to $300 at this event for such marginal improvements to my experience. I ain't no fucking newbie that blows a wad and then brags about getting superior service from two marginal chicas in a strictly timed 20 minute cita.

Thanks for the update. I was really looking forward to going to 'buffet #3' , but based on your report I'll pass.

Do you know of any other buffet type events held in TJ by others?

Mrtbkk: I don't know of any other buffet type events in TJ.

I did get to read another review of this event by another attendee that actually liked the event. This other guy is a prolific poster on another board. This guy has an adequate amount of time spent in LZ to be an experienced monger, but to me, from his many posts, he seems to run around LZ like an inexperienced newbie.

He reported that he went upstairs five times during the event, and that he also saw a lot of attendees that were left hanging for long periods of time when Mermaids held out and made their rooms falsely difficult to obtain for cita service after 9 or 10PM that night.

As I said, the guy acts like a noob & caved twice to the organizer's demand for extra dinero. For two of his five citas he paid $40 EXTRA each time to the house just for the privilege of taking two chicas up at once, and in those instances he was granted a whopping 30 minutes upstairs with them instead of the standard 20 minutes.

This is a guy that in the past always answered any question posed to him (as nauseum) but he was suspiciously silent when someone asked him point blank how much money he spent in total (over and above the $99 admission). But if I can be allowed to read between the lines from the information he did provide, it was a much more expensive evening for him than it was for me.

My guess is that he spent somewhere between $100 and $200 just in buying 10 to 20 ficha drinks for the seven different chicas he took upstairs. Without my need to guess, he reported paying $40 twice to the house to be allowed to conduct trios (threesomes) for two of his five citas. He's also a more generous tipper than I am, so my guess is that he probably spent around $100 or more on chica tips to the seven chicas that fucked or blew him.

I'm sure he dumped some generous tips on the male organizers of the event. What I can't determine from the information he did provide, is whether he spent three times the money I spent, or four times my total expenditures.

He said he received bbbj 40% of the time, which is better than the 17% rate that I got. To me that difference wasn't worth the huge extra expense. But we are all entitled to spend our money as we choose.

He said that he enjoyed himself at the buffet, but from everything I know about the guy, he is easily pleased.

Scatmandoo,

Thanks. The $40 up charge to get a room would of killed my mood.

And if that guy is a vet no need to act and spend like a nube.

Thanks for reply.

You are welcome Mrbkk:

I often laugh at posters that criticize other mongers for paying the chicas too much (when they assert that overpaying chicas ruins LZ for the serious mongers). The zona is a pretty big place and I never believe an overpaying monger significantly affects the economic balance of the zona overall.

But Mermaids is a pretty small bar and massage parlor with a somewhat captive roster of chicas. That guy that allowed the Mermaids scum operators to entice in twenty or so mongers under one offer...only to renege on the all-you-can-eat chica buffet offer during the event and then grind the participants for significantly greater room fees did a huge disservice to the other mongers at the event.

Had he not caved and rewarded those asswipes with more money, it would have been hard to move away from the original buffet dealio. The chicas were supposedly paid bonuses if they went up a number of times and by caving and allowing the management to artificially & prematurely end the buffet was a disservice to both the chicas and most mongers in attendence.