Trip report, November 2002

A Newbie's first impressions of Tijuana

Armed with as much Tijuana information from the Internet that my brain could possibly absorb, I head out for my first visit with a co-worker. We fly in to Las Vegas (cheap airfare, plus it was part of our trip), rent a car and drive across California in the rain. It wasn't a pleasant drive - I'm not use to this much traffic, and visibility was poor.

We take the last exit on the U.S. side, and look for parking. Already I have forgotten the suggestions that others have posted, and find several choices. We settle for a lot that charges $4 a day, right next to the tram tracks and maybe a block or so from the border. I pay for the first day, tell them we'll be in Mexico for two days, and everything seems good. I want to offer a tip, but the moment slips by without a good opportunity. The car was waiting for us two days later, with no problems.

Before crossing the border, we stop for a quick hamburger at McDonald's, and get some cash from an ATM. It's not quite clear where we are suppose to go, but when a tram pulls in and people unload, we just follow the crowd through a temporary entrance and up a ramp. The pedestrian bridge crosses the freeway, and another ramp brings us down to the border. We push our way through two turnstiles, and then we're in Mexico.

It's a fairly pleasant scene that greets us, with a few restaurants and shops with lots of color. A couple of guys with silver bracelets on their arms confront us. But we are in a bit of a rush. Our hotel reservations are good until 4:00 p.m., and it's already after 3:00. I could have called in earlier and gave them my credit card number for a confirmed reservation, but thought that we would be there by 4:00 easily. Now we were rushed a little.

We were both travelling light, with small backpacks, and we opted to walk instead of taking a cab. Both of us are required to pass physical fitness tests at work, and we take every opportunity we can for walking. We head out across the pedestrian bridge over the river - it stinks - and walk towards the arch. Once there, we know we're on Revoluccion, and it's a seven-block walk up to our hotel.

Along the way, people in front of shops, restaurants and clubs try to lure us into their businesses, but we march on by. At every corner someone is saying "taxi", often suggesting places we may wish to be taken to (Massage? Chicago Club? Donkey show?). Some of the people are aggressive in their sales pitch, and we have to step around them and force our way past.

We get to our hotel, the Villa de Zaragoza, with time to spare. We get our room, but only one key (that proved to be an inconvenience). The room is okay, clean, quiet, and the shower works well. We take a quick breather, clean up and go out and hit the town.

Our first order of business is finding some food. Ricardos is next door to the hotel, and turns out to be a good restaurant, but we find that out latter. First we walk down Revoluccion, through the barkers and hawkers and other "handlers". We're invited upstairs to a strip club, and decide to check it out. The handler seems friendly enough, inviting us just to check it out without obligation. We do. On the way up the stairs, a chica is walking down, and slaps my co-worker on the ass as he passes. Welcome to Tijuana. Upstairs, things are quiet, with no floorshow as it's too early. A few chicas are hanging out, and a couple of them seem disappointed that we don't stay. But we're off to find some food, and the chica is coming back up the stairs as we go down, and gives my co-worker another slap on the ass, this time with a loud "crack". I'm sure he felt that one.

We're walking past Banana Ranas (or something like that), and a handler invites us upstairs. He leads us up, and brings out menus and drinks. It turns out the barker on the sidewalk is also our waiter! Good food, reasonably priced. We had a table out on the balcony, overlooking the street scene, catching a little bit of rain. The place was quiet, with only a few other customers, but the service was quick.

After dinner, we head into the Zona. My co-worker doesn't know about the Zona, and neither of us has been here before. But I had some idea of what to expect and where to look, thanks to many that have posted this information. We go to the arch, turn left, and a half-block down see a couple of street girls. They were not pretty. They were kind of scary, in fact. Maybe this trip is a bad mistake, I thought.

We turn right and go down the hill. More street girls, only more normal looking. Then we get to the alley. And Oh My God! There were dozens of girls lined up on each side of the alley. A few were young and cute, maybe more than a few. We take a walk through the alley, and chicas tug at our shirtsleeves, sometimes grabbing a hand and pulling us back. My co-worker was tempted to stop, but I say no, I have a destination in mind.

We walk around the corner and find our destination: Adelitas. Just inside the door, a floorshow is going on, a fine looking dancer with long legs wrapped around the pole. The place is crowded, and a bit warm. It doesn't look like there's anyplace to sit, but a waiter comes up to us and helps us find a place, right next to the dance floor. We order beer, and he brings out cold bottled beer with a few slices of lime. Three dollars a beer, and the change is correct. I leave a dollar tip in his tray, and all seems well.

We drink our beer, enjoy the floorshow, tipping the dancers occasionally. Being new here, we don't know how to connect with the chicas, and maybe we're not quite ready anyway. Eventually I need to find a bathroom. Remembering directions from a map that is posted on the Internet, I head past the bar and go to the men's room. Inside two chicas are talking, and one is handing out paper towels to guys after they wash their hands. I figure what the hey, and go to a urinal and take a leak. After washing my hands, I take a towel, dry my hands and drop a couple of quarters in the tip box. On exiting the men's room, one of the chicas sneaks a hand down by my crotch and gives me a gentle squeeze. Welcome to Tijuana.

We decide to try another club. Sure, we could enjoy staying at Adelitas, but we are curious what's going on at all the other places. And we want to take a walk in the alley again. After getting our shirtsleeves pulled a few dozen times, we end up in Miami. There's a floorshow going on, with a nice looking dancer. We sit down and ask for beer. We get two-for-one, and it comes with more limes. Another dancer comes up, named Alix, and I am in Lust. She is cute, and I hope to meet her after her set, but she disappears and the dance floor is taken over by couples. We're not sure if it's appropriate to approach a chica for dancing or what. A couple of the waiters stop at our table and ask if we would like a private dance, but we're not interested in dancing waiters. Of course, I'm sure they are acting as middlemen, but I hope to deal with the girls directly. In hindsight, I should have asked for Alix, but being the new guy in the bar, I was trying to avoid any embarrassing mistakes. Oh well, the night is still young.

With a good beer buzz going, we decide to walk back to the hotel and make plans for the evening. It's raining, and we get wet on the way, so we get out jackets and head back on out. We start enjoying the hawkers and handlers along the way on Revoluccion. Without much delay, we find ourselves back in the Zona.

We walk through the alley, again, and a "handler" suggests we try the New York club. I haven't heard about it, but we decide to check it out. Inside, there are only a few customers, and there's a dancer on the elevated floor. We get a couple of beers, and sit back and watch the show. A new dancer comes up on stage, and once again I am in lust. I didn't catch her name, but she is thin, with small tight breasts and perky nipples, thin legs and small ass. I think this is the one, if I can buy her a drink or take her to a room, I am ready. I bring a couple dollars up to the stage to tip her, and hope that encourages her to see me later. But when she ends her dance, she changes clothes and disappears before I have a chance to make eye contact. Another dancer is on stage, this one short and sweet looking like Alix, and I soon forget the other dancer. Two chicas come to our table, and one introduces herself to me. I buy her a drink, but my co-worker is ignoring both of them, being a little rude in my opinion. So I buy the other chica a drink as well. My chica is very sweet and cuddly. She sips her drink, sits on my lap and cuddles up next to me. The other chica takes a hint from my co-worker and downs her drink quickly and leaves. I'm cuddling and caressing my chica for about 10 minutes or so until her drink is gone. She asks for another, but I feel like I should get my co-worker out of there, and we depart.

We take a walk in the rain, and I explain the concept of fiche drinks. He understands, and suggests we try another club. But first, can we get something to eat? We end up at a taco stand outside of La Tropa. Great tacos! They are very tasty. We go inside, and like other clubs, there's a floorshow. No chicas approach us for drinks here, just dancers on stage. No chance of me falling in lust here, as these girls are not as cute as in other clubs. They are fun, though. I pull out a dollar for a tip, and the dancer comes running over and jumps in my lap, knocking over my beer in the process. She stuffs a nipple into my mouth and grinds her crotch into mine. She does the same to other customers, including my co-worker. We develop an unspoken strategy of grabbing the beer for safety whenever the other pulls out a dollar for a tip. Other dancers are just as athletic and aggressive.

After an hour or so we decide to call it a night and head back to the hotel, stopping for a couple of tacos. At the hotel, I announce that I would like to go out alone, maybe pick up on one of the street girls in the alley. My co-worker wants to go back to the club where the chica slapped his ass.

I head back to the alley, and find a chica that caught my eye earlier. Her English is as limited as my Spanish, but she is able to ask for twenty dollars. I offer twenty-five "sin ropa", and she agrees. We walk into the hotel, upstairs to a desk, and I pay five for the room, condom included. We go into the room, she brushes some rain off my clothes, saying "agua". I find the language barrier interesting. She turns on a TV, which has porno, and steps into a bathroom to undress. I undress in the room, and she comes out naked, and hands me the condom. I use signals to suggest she put it on me, and she agrees. While she's putting on the condom, I try touching her breasts, but she pulls back slightly, saying "frio". She looks very cute, young, thin with small breasts, just the way I like, but there isn't any foreplay. She just lays back and invites me to enter her. I oblige, she makes some noise and movements, but it seems kind of mechanical. We're a little warm by now, and she lets me play with her breasts. Her nipples perk up when I touch them, and this turns me on and I shoot my load. She almost springs up and starts getting dressed. I do the same, we walk out without saying much of anything. I say "gracias" and she just smiles and returns to her post in the alley.

On the way back to the hotel, I had two interesting encounters. First, two guys selling flowers approach me. This seems weird, as I'm alone, and why would two of them approach me at the same time? They seem aggressive, and when I sense that their hands are brushing up against me, I think "pick-pockets" and push them away. Then, a chica approaches me just a block from my hotel, near 7th and Revoluccion, offering to go to my room with me, says she'll put a smile on my face. She's not pretty, and I just shot a load, so I'm not interested and step around her. She grabs my arm and asks to walk with me, and I raise my arms and step away from her rather dramatically, just as I notice a police van approaching. They pull up to her and put her in the van - I just kept walking, trying not to look back.

On Saturday, we do some shopping during the day. Breakfast at Ricardos was delicious, but the only thing I understood on the menu was Huevos Rancheros. If you don't mind the language barrier, I highly recommend this restaurant.

In the evening, we decide to try some strip clubs along Revolution. But it's early, so we go back to the Zona and check in with Adelitas. Still hot inside, and even more crowded. No place to sit, so after cruising through the bar once, we go out and walk over to Chicago Club. CC is quiet, almost no one inside, so we leave and walk back up to Revoluccion.

I want to check out Ceasers, and a handler is out on the sidewalk and leads us in. But this place is quieter than CC. Another handler lures us into Peanuts and Beer, and here there is a stage show with a topless dancer, plus a second stage with three clothed dancers who don't have anything else to do at the moment. We get beer, and almost immediately two chicas join us. We buy them drinks, and they proceed to spend the next 10 minutes or so trying to convince us to get a private show. We may be interested, but want to check out our options first. The girl on the dance floor looks much nicer than the two sitting with us. When we decline their suggestions, a big fat broad comes over and tries to add a little pressure to the sales pitch.

When they finally give up, another chica comes over. This one is much better looking, but I may have been a little rude to her, as I wanted to sit back and watch the show a little before considering further options. But she is not deterred, and climbs up on my lap, pulls out her breasts and sticks a nipple in my mouth. I tip her a dollar and hope that's the end of it, but when I decline a private show, she seems upset, starts lecturing me on how she enjoys her work and is proud of her performance, trying to make me feel like a chump for turning her down.

Another chica comes over, this time with a handler to help negotiate a deal. I decide to leave, and my co-worker agrees. We try Ceaser's again, and it's still quiet. We make a pit stop at the hotel, and try to peak into Isis. The handler at the door is annoying. We just want to go in and check it out, maybe for future reference, but he tries to make a big deal out of bringing us in. Perhaps he gets a cut from escorting people in? Something about it turns us off. We try to sneak past him while he's talking to a cab driver, but he sees us and leaps forward to escort us in. On another occasion, he wasn't at the door, but when we go in he's at the bar and leaps up and runs over to us before we could get all the way inside the bar. We never did get in there.

So we walk back to the Zona, and walk through the alley, again. This time we try Hong Kong. It's loud, and there is a continual stage show, with some attractive dancers. Two for one beers, and no hustle at all. Just a good old strip show. We drink our beers and tip the dancers. Life could be worse.

Later in the evening we want to check out one of the upscale clubs, and end up at Lord Blacks. There's a six-dollar cover, and it's the only place we ever paid a cover charge. Men in tuxedos escorted us in after frisking us for weapons. There were silicone-enhanced dancers on stage, and one came over, sat on my lap and gave me the "menu". Sixty dollars a song for a nude dance, touching allowed. Much too expensive for my tastes, especially in Tijuana. Before leaving, we made use of the bathroom, and here is where the high-class façade falls apart. The bathroom was run-down, dirty, and the attendant was handing out wads of toilet paper instead of paper towels to dry our hands with.

We go down to the Chicago Club, and it's packed. A continuous floor show, with some nice looking chicas. There are a few chicas scattered about the place, but all seemed to be with a guy/customer. Once again, we drink our beer and watch the show.

We walk back up to Revoluccion with a good beer buzz going, and decide to check out Unicornio. We go down the stairs into a large room, with lots of empty tables and chairs, but a few customers and chicas scattered about. A dancer on the floor is not exactly pretty but she looks like she enjoys dancing, and I tip her. Two chicas come over, sit on our laps and we buy a round of drinks. There's some crotch groping, nipple kissing and some cuddling, but we both decline to buy a second drink for them, and they leave. We kick back and enjoy the show. The only attractive dancer takes the stage, and we enjoy. Eventually the attractive dancer sits next to my co-worker, while the fun-but-not-pretty dancer sits with me. We buy drinks and start talking. Next thing I know, my co-worker and the attractive dancer are into some heavy necking and groping, and soon they get up and go to a room. I'm left with the fun dancer, who asks if I may be interested in going to a room, but I decline. I tell her I enjoy her company, and she doesn't seem to be disappointed. We talk about lots of stuff, all the while she's cuddly and giving me lots of attention, which I like. When the conversation turns to dancing, I mention that I can't dance, just too clumsy. She insists on pulling me up on the floor and proceeds to give me dance lessons. For three songs, we are dancing away, sometimes in an erotic kind of dance. It was a lot of fun, and a great way to kill some time while until my co-worker returned to see if I was still there.

The next day we left in the morning, walking to the border. It took about 35 minutes to get through. The car was waiting where we left it, and the sun was out. It was a nice sunny drive back to Las Vegas.

Two guys, two days in TJ and only two chicks? One a SG? Seems like a waste.

It's interesting you read up on TJ enough to walk all over town on your first trip, yet you did not know how to "connect with the chicas" in AB or CC ... for future reference just walk up to them and ask them how much! Chicas in CC are never "taken." Just signal the one you like to come over or simply go get her. If the loser sitting with her gets mad, too bad. It's a rare occasion when the girl won't make her way over to you within 5 minutes at most.

here is where the high-class façade falls apart. The bathroom was run-down, dirty, and the attendant was handing out wads of toilet paper instead of paper towels to dry our hands with.

Ha! I laughed out loud when I read that! So true ... "high-class" and Tijuana don't go together in any way, shape or form.

-Superman-

Just returned from Buenos Aires.

At the airport I run into two dudes I met earlier in the trip...I'm showing them some digital pictures. I still had some pictures from my Tijuana trip last month on it. The dudes hadn't been to Tijuana in years. They couldn't believe some of the pictures I had. They were impressed. They said that when they read my trip report on Tijuana they couldn't believe I'd go to such a place. After looking at the pictures they said they were going to make a trip there. (One of the dudes lived in LA!!!). Ha, ha.

I don't think they were members of Club Hombre but I referred them to the site.

Again, you can't compare the two cities. Totally different worlds but Tijuana has some hotties...just the sessions are no where near BA. Also, the city is a dump compared to BA. Still a good time can be had there. Guys that are going to Tijuana are NOT going for the sight seeing.

Have you thought about sending this report to Penthouse Forum? Just kidding. All I can say is, you have nowhere to go but up. Great times can be had in TJ.

I wouldn't call it a waste. For one thing, I had a great time. It was a new experience for me, and I learned a few things that will be put to good use on future visits to Tijuana. I am already planning my second trip, and will do a few things differently. For one thing, I will go alone, as that will give me a lot more freedom to interact with the chicas. And I'll probably skip the bars on Revoluccion and stick to the Zona.

Before making this trip, I checked out some bulletin boards, including this one, for some tips on making this a successful vacation. It was helpful, although I had to sort through a lot of boasting to get to the information I wanted. My purpose in posting my trip report is to provide other "newbies" a chance to read what a first trip to Tijuana might be like. It is not intended as a scorecard for TJ veterans. I simply think that my trip report, combined with others, may help potential new Tijuana visitors.

My report was lengthy, and I left a few things out, simply because I wanted to get a report posted, not write a book. We went to more clubs than mentioned, and that brings up a question some of you veterans might help me with. In Las Chevalas and a couple of other clubs, the main attraction seems to be dancing, that is, couples dancing on a crowded dance floor. I assume these are guys finding chicas at the bar and asking them to dance, and I assume there's some kind of tip involved? If so, what's the appropriate tip? I kind of like the idea of dancing with a girl, maybe buying her a drink and talking, before going up to a room. Being a newbie, I wasn't sure if these were established couples (regular customers with house chicas), or if a newbie gringo would be welcome to join the fun.

Another thing I neglected to mention is that the sidewalks were very dirty and slippery, due to rain. I was wearing a light-colored pair of pants, and by the end of the night they were mud splattered and dirty up to the knees. Walking was dangerous, especially on hills, as tile sidewalks were very slick.

As for making connections with chicas, it didn't take me long to figure that out, especially in AB and CC (I may have to make a little more effort at Miami or Las Chevalas). My problem was more like being a kid in a candy store, not knowing which chica I wanted most. Next time I'll bring a little more cash and try a few.

"My purpose in posting my trip report is to provide other "newbies" a chance to read what a first trip to Tijuana might be like. It is not intended as a scorecard for TJ veterans."

-This is my favorite kind of trip report to read. I love hearing what others first impressions of tijuana are.


For your first trip you did pretty good. It sounds like you covered a lot of ground in two days. And most important, you had fun.

"As for making connections with chicas, it didn't take me long to figure that out, especially in AB and CC (I may have to make a little more effort at Miami or Las Chevalas)."

-Good assumetion. Getting a chica to the room in AB/CC is a lock. At Las Chevalas and most of the other Zona bars a lot of the chicas claim that they doen't go to the room. You can get most of them to the room but it will take more effort, more ficha dricks, and more time. Some people enjoy this aspect and view it as a sport(although not me).

AB/CC has the greatest number of chicas that can speak American. Outside these two bars the more Mexican you can speak the better.


Here is some sugested reading that might help in your next trip.(less bullshit,more facts)

Suggestions from Veterans


-snapper-

One more thing. Ask Milkman to give you a list of all the Trans-testicle Bars. Just so you don't walk into one of those places by accident.

Serioulsy though, of those 4 reports in the "Suggestions form Veterans" section Robertx's and StrikeEagle's have the most useful information -IMO

...and remember, every chica in the Zona is approachable, so don't be shy. The most used pick-up line in a puta-bar is "how much?".

Trailbos:

Many of the bars are still struggling thru a transitory period, unsure of what they really are. Are they a classic ficha bar, where the girls drink and dance for a dollar with anyone who asks, or are they a more Americanized strip bar with a stage show?

Many bars do both, in an effort to try to satisfy everyone. It can be funny, because the nature of the bar can change in one minute - the music, the people dancing, everything. You seemed to be lucky to walk into several of these places while a show was going on. Many places the show only happens every couple of hours or so. LC, for example, does have a show.

At a traditional ficha bar many of the chicas do not have sex with customers, or at least not very often. Some chicas are in between, and take some courting to get them in bed, even if you are paying them. And some just want to go to the room. At these bars a low key approach usually works best - buy her a drink, talk, maybe dance - and then inquire about a session in la cama.

At Adelitas and the Chicago Club, all the chicas go to the room. These are pretty much straight out hooker bars. At these bars just walking up to a chica and asking how much is OK, although not my personal recomendation. Even hookers like polite guys.

The more of a traditional style bar it is, the more likely you are to need some Spanish. CC and AB chicas usually speak a fair amount of English.

One last thing, you might spend lass time wandering around if you read up on each bar. Some places (Ceasars, for example) don't get going until late. That can be a great place, but seldom before midnight. CC doesn't get rockin until 10PM or so. AB and Tropical, on the other hand, can be great in the afternoon.

And your trip certainly wasn't a waste. Sounds like you had fun. Heck, my first trip to La Zona, I left without doing any chicas!

Thanks, Curious and Snapper. If I remember correctly, I think there was a stripper on the floor when we first walked into Las Chevalas, but when she finished and collected tips, the couples dancing took over. We sat with our beer and watched - one chica dancing next to us had on this tight spandex skirt that kept riding up on her as she danced, and every couple of minutes she would pull it back down to cover her ass. I had a good beer buzz going, and this just seemed like a fun, friendly place to hang out awhile. I wasn't really desperate to connect with a chica at the moment, just a little curious on how it works. I think it would be fun to be up on the dance floor with a mini-skirted chica doing a little dancing, but I'm a bit of a klutz and would need a little encouragement before doing so.

I did check some recommendations before making the trip, and avoided clubs that were listed as having TV's or TS's. We did take some chances though, going into Unicornio, which many people advise against. We had fun there, but the descriptions I have read were accurate.

My visit to Tijuana has sparked an interest in learning Spanish. Where I live, there's not much exposure to the language. I have picked up some self-teaching tapes, and I'm considering a trip to Ensenada to take an immersion course at a language school there. Of course, that will give me a great excuse to visit Tijuana again.

Unicornio is like a bad traffic accident. When you go by it you have to look.

You must live at the north pole if you have no exposure to Spanish. Mexican communities are sprouting up in the most unlikely places.

Good report trailbos. Don't worry that you did not do 4 chics a day. Everyone's situation is different. Everyone has a different agenda. Some guys do 5 a day and others may do 1 a month. The main idea is to have a good time. And it sounds like you did that.

Hope you post about your next trip.

Great read, thanks for the post, though I also thought you sounded quite savvy for a supposed newbie. Of course my first experience in the Zona was similar in that I had read a bunch of reports and didn't do many girls -- a grand total of three in three separate visits over a week's time while attending a conference in San Diego. Wow, that was more than 4 years ago!

I did make up for lost time on my next trip down when I stayed at the Villa Zaragoza like you did and started doing 3-4 girls a day. That still has to be the greatest trip I've ever had. I quickly became a TJ addict, and I doubt I'll ever shake that disease.