Subtopic	Posts		Updated
	Archive 01	50		2003/07/23, 09:05 pm

I have to admit that she doesn't speak english other than "Thank you", and my spanish comprehension is worse than my speech, but I do think that was the gist of it.
Pauncho

Ever notice how some of these chicas make the sign of the cross after you give them money?

Gaucho

That would only be on their first gig of the night (day). Same goes for the waiter that is tipped for the first time thst day (night).
It's like a "thank you" and "keep it coming" ritual.

Nogi

Ever have a chica stop at the AB shrine, curtsy, make the sign of the cross, then go to the room with you?

The Senator

I've discovered almost all the workers do that with their first tip or customer. That goes for waiters, waitress's cabbies you name it. It's basically for good luck and a way to say thanks.

Senator,

Again, that usually happens when they are with their first of the shift though some do it everytime.

The Catholic priests in Mexico and in the US that serve Hispanic communities pride themselves on their flexibility. When women who do not want to have more children come to them asking about birth control, they are given the standard line that the Church does not approve of it, but then are told about their "options". The priests tell them that if they take birth control pills, they commit a sin every day, and have to confess it every week. If they have a tubal ligation, they only have commited a sin once, and only have to confess it one time. Guess which is the most popular form of birth control in the Hispanic-American community?

Well no wonder there's so much hunger and war in the world.

God is too busy helping whores and cabbies earn a living, and baseball/scoccer/football teams win games, to have any time left over for something like putting an end to disease!

I was disguised as a dirty, urine-encrusted and unconscious 'ratero,' laying in the gutter, near the intersection of Constitution and la callejon. A familiar, handsome, middle-aged man walked past a young attractive working woman and said, "hola carniosita." She looked at him and, with a confused and hurt expression on her face, complained, " ...hola? After six months, all you have to say is 'hola?'" The man did not stop walking. Her face tightened. "Asshole," she hissed. I continued to watch the street and drool.

Catcha Manana, Preciosa de Mi Vida!

I always got to Tijuana in disguise, but I never thought about pissing on myself. How innovative !

This one worked great the one time I tried it last night at CC...

Chica: Joo wan com-pa-nee bay-bee.

Me: (in perfect english) I'm sorry, I don't speak english.

She walked away with the most insanely confused look on her face. As an added bonus, it caused one of my buddies to spew a good portion of the beer he was drinking out his nose. Chicas are so much fun.

I often get asked by my rented Latina girlfriends, "Why do you like Mexican girls?" I don't have the heart to tell them it's because they're CHEAP! I usually tell them it's because American women are crazy and frigid. They seem to buy it

Good answer Mr Bill !

How are things going ?
Milky

Thanks, milky. I guess this one falls into the "Snappy answers to stupid questions" category a la Mad Magazine.

Things are good. I'm engaged in a sordid affair with the all-time porno star of Nogales, so I guess it could be worse

How about yourself?

Mikly is also engaged with a "all-time porno star'. Unfortunately this is the the all-time porno star of The Kinkle Bar.

Milky is looking for a black widow spiderwoman.

Met a chica while crossing the street, an hour later we were in bed telling each other our life stories. Spinner, cute (like monica sg), tremendous sexo, beyond gfe. Upon hearing that I do not drink nor take drugs, she said, " you mean not even crystal?"

Just after I had finished with this chica she holds up the used condom and says, "Babies, say bye bye to daddy." Then she throw the condom containing my offspring into the trash can that sat next to the table.

...I guess you had to be there

Snapper that will be tough to top. A classic! While I`m racking my memory from 5+ years, let me spin this one. My fave current sg phrase is when they call out "whetto" (guero). Using it not in a bad way...I think/hope. By changing the tone it might be used disparagingly. Here are 10 possible interperations I`ve thought it could mean. 1) Yankee go home - (& take my sister with you); 2)Gringo; 3)Whitey; 4) Any variation of #3 - exp. white prick, white asshole; 5) John; 6)Douche bag; 7)Low life dirt bag; 8)Slime ball scum bag; 9)Pathetic loser; 10)(Very) ugly american; 11) Redneck; 12)hard up sob. What do you mongers think when they call you "hey whetto"? Adelita.

I hope some of the meanings you have listed are incorrect, for I get called this all the time.

I generally assume they are just referring me, the white dude. While not real polite, I don't generally believe any disrespect is intended.

Here is a good one from a Lao chick. This non professional girl was the biggest slut around. I knew at least 5 guys she banged plus she was married and her husband was doing anything he could stick his dick into as well. On top of that one time she had a rash on her "hoy" and when her friend consulted with me for medical advice I said get her to a doctor but instead they decided some traditional Lao herbal remedy was in order. What I am getting at, is when it was my turn to do this girl I figured a condom was definitely a necessity even if she was a "nonprofessional". We were in bed and I was ready so I grabbed the condom and went to put it on. She got all hurt looking and said to me "I don't like those. Men only wear condoms with whores. I am not a whore."

It refers to anyone who has light colored hair. In my family, guero can mean any one from blond to light brown hair. Not a bad word at all unless it is preceded by the word pinche.

Anyone remember "The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly?"

Tuco Benedicto Pacifico Juan Maria Ramirez (known as 'The Rat') was always calling Clint Eastwood's character "Blondie".

Dem Gnomes

guerro can refer to light hair but it refers mostly to light skin color, rubio refers to light hair color.

There was some pretty funny posts in this thread.
I laughed my ass off on Mr Sluggo's July 28th, 2002 post. Absolute Classic!

Considerate sg of the month award goes to my date who warned me: I have a bad head cold so you`d better not eat me today, you might catch it! (Yeah the cold virus & multitude of other UNpleasantries).

Fel the Kat told me one last nite that I really enjoyed! He negotiated 3 hours for $125 w/ young sg on main street. Everything was going swell until she called out "time is up". Surprised, he looks at his watch and only 2 hours had elapsed. Telling her the situation she replies "no, we started at 1 it`s now 3 o'clock. The little arm has been to the number 1, 2, & now 3- so we`ve been here for 3 hrs. Time for me to go". What could he do other than 'eat' the last hour of his deal??? Classic!

Took in sg the other day at the Edwaurdo Hotel on main street. I had negotiated all clothes off for the 20 min. session. Once inside she asks me "take off the top half of clothing too"? I know a rip-off extra charge is about to happen. But wait- she`s not asking for more $. She repeats her ques. so I just nod my head yes. So she takes it all off. Now I`m later thinking what was THAT all about? So there`s gotta be clients who don`t want her to strip all the way even tho it`s included in the original price?? Must be Mexican clients because no self respecting monger would shake his head no in that situation! By the way this has happened a few times before to me w/ other sg`s. Puzzling to say the least.