Porker -- You're right: I mis-remembered who took a particular photo I had in mind.

During my January Rio trip I ran into some hot looking girls at Help and they mentioned to me that after Carnival they go to Italy to work. Does anyone know what the monger scene is like there?

Was in Help disco every night for all five nights of my trip. Entry fee is still R$18 before midnight and R$28 after midnight. Selections were as good as my previous trip in January. Not too many of them are quoting outrageous prices like in January and not as crowded either. Probably because of the "after the carnaval affect".

On second thought...it didn't look as crowded because they had made an extension of another bar and dance floor right behind the main bar. This gives more room for people to float from the big dance floor to the small one and the balcony in the back.

Layne.... I finally saw your micro-spinner on this trip. I didn't know who she was until UWphoto pointed her out to me. I don't blame her from running away from you...my god, I would run to if I was her size.

Dino


(Message edited by dfenderone7 on March 23, 2004)

Defenderone7 -- Was Layne's microspinner drinking a glass of milk while looking in her backpack for ID??

SF,

No...but apparently she had already drank her milk cause I did noticed the milk mustache. And yes, she was standing in line in front of us buying the entry ticket and looking for her ID. I thought I saw a pacifier and a couple of oreo cookies in her purse.

Dino

Dfenderone, I'm sure that must be her. Did you also see her mom outside Help waiting and holding her schoolbooks? I think Mom's about 30 or so.

That microspinner does look about 16, but her English is way too good for a schoolgirl.

You're assuming she ran away from Layne because of the size differential, but I've seen scores of garotas--of every size and shape imaginable--running from Layne. He just has that effect on the garotas...

Ummm, as I recall the night I saw Layne with her outside Help, she wasn't running away. If she had been trying, she would have tripped over his tongue. He looked like a big dog after a long, long run, badly in need of a bowl of water...

SF_Hombre,
I think there are two different girls involved here. The Microspinner really didn't want much to do with Layne, and she wanted a ton of money. The girl you are referring to, let's call her "the youngster", didn't have an ID. Layne being the prudent monger, passed, but not until he asked me if I would walk her over to his apt.
CG

CG is correct. The microspinner didn't literally run away from Layne, but did so figuratively by asking for 1000 reais, non-negotiable . The little girl without the ID was another pretty amusing episode. You could see the angel standing on one shoulder saying "don't do it, Layne" and the devil on the other saying"nail the little girl now." Layne resolved the dilemma by trying to get CG to do his dirty work.

yep you guys have it straight..the little blonde micro spinner finally warmed up to me but the price R300 and her rules(no DFK or BBBJ) made it not so drooling anymore...she was a cutie tho...smart girl also...her official stats were 4'9" maybe 10" and weighing in at no more than 80/90 lbs...

ahh the "youngster"....better not say anymore or hombre will kick us out of here...but yes that moment took every ounce of reasoning to bail...the devil was also telling me how fresh she was..I am so glad you guys were there to slap me...SFHombre next time you see her with correct ID please call me ...

I was just in Rio, and heard from a guy that help was closing for good in May. The place next to it bought it out, and is turning it into a hotel. Any one else heard about this? Say it is not so!

Believe it when you see it.

Even if it did close, I would not consider it any great loss. This could open the door for another club to take its place and there is still plenty of action to be had in Rio.

NICE APRIL FOOL JOKE!!

Do you have any idea how much money flows thru help on a weekly basis? No way a company could afford to "buy them out", it would cost millions.

Was in Help every night this week and it seemed to be a little slow. Not too many guys in town and thus not too many girls show up for work. But from what I saw so far...the quality is still very good. Am I wrong in thinking that the musice they played is the same every night. I get tired of dancing to the same music.

Dino

Yes, Help was slow last night. I got in just before the bell and was surprised at how it was half-full (although I usually do get there later). Not a lot of candy for my eyes at first, but it did fill up a little later, and I did see some good stuff by 1:30 or 2. And I got a good one.

Is the back bar and balcony still open at Help? That is one explanation on sometimes it doesn't seem as crowded like in the past.

Cueball,

Yes, the back bar and the balcony are still open but there were not that many people back there anyway. I hang out with my date, my friends and their dates every night at the balcony cooling off after dancing in the main floor.

Dino

This might be fun...who has boinked the most girls in the last 1 1/2 years on the Help Photo page? Go to discoteca-help.com, click on photos, click 2003-2004. I thought I would have more but I have 4...
Row 5 far left, the blonde
Row 5 3rd from left
Row 6 far right sunglasses
Row 9 far left...uh-oh, my bad-same as #2
Row 15 3rd from left

Hands down it has to be GCL - He did them all.

I would have to disagree. not GCL's style. UWphoto has my vote.
SL

SportoLingo is correct. I dont even have to look to tell you the answer is Zero. I have only done one Help girl in my life. I met her outside at the Terrace, I borrowed the keys of one of the most degenerate of all mongers--Sterling. I then ran her up to his apartment for 4 to 5 minutes, cant remember exactly how long now as it has been a couple of years ago.

Anyway, I am still in Rapid City. WOrking on my report from yesterdays action. Will get that posted as soon as possible.

"Action"? Did you finally snag a bison?

BS

Well, lets define "action". I unwittingly ate the most endangered species of mammel in North America for lunch. I was rejected by an Indian squaw. Then I was handcuffed. Pinned to the ground. Drug by the heels out of a store (and banned for life). I was later thrown out of a strip club and as if that isnt bad enough--I hid huddled inside a garbage dumpster to retrieve my porno magazines so that I could jerk off ALONE in my hotel room.

ummmm. How was your day BS?

"mammal"
not mammel
You ate a mammal.

Mamel, on the other hand, is a city of western Lithuania on the Baltic Sea. Founded as a fortress in 1252 by Teutonic Knights, it was an important trading town of the Hanseatic League and was later held by Sweden, Prussia, and Russia before becoming (1924) part of an autonomous region within Lithuania. It was occupied by Germany in World War II and captured by Soviet forces in 1945. It is the chief port and industrial city of Lithuania.

Population: 204,300.

GCL, perhaps you'd have better luck getting laid in Mamel?

You sir are a loathsome creature. I promise my luck will change soon and I will be thumbing my nose at all of you bastards.

I promise tomorrow's report will solidify my place in Monger history. As a matter of fact I plan to write my acceptance speech for Monger Of The Year on my flight back from Rapid City.

And I dont care what you say... Black-Footed Ferrett tastes like mammel.

Guys -- I think it was just an amomoly -- a malapriapism if you will, that GCL mumbled mammel when he meant to mangle mammal.

P.S. GCL -- how many times have you eaten your ferret?

"anomaly"
not amomoly
you think it was just an "anomaly"

Amomoly however, might be a subconscious reference to the seperation anxiety you are feeling from living a continent away from your Mom, who is the only mammal who ever loved you. Perhaps you could seek solace in the arms of a Black-Footed Ferret absent your mothers' presence? I'm sure GCL could bring one back to Rio for you, provided his appetites don't overwhelm him inflight.

GCL,
Although new to this board, I must say you are rather young to have such a selective memory. Having met you several years ago, you befreinded me with some Portuguese language lessons in computer format. A nobel gesture, that I felt deseved renumeration. On my second trip to Rio, several of us were chatting of good times and enjoying a chopp or two when Mac(of Chicago fame) introduced us to a garota of exceptional quality. The look in your eye revealed your desire. At this point I offered to you, that I would cover the cost of your triste with this beauty; as compensation for your magnanimus gesture in starting my way to butchering the Portuguese language. You readily agreed and off to an apt, that you were sharing with a well known tour guide, we all went. Now most of us went only to watch a football game, well and to see your date come out of the shower.
But, I contend you are a liar. As a fact, this girl was pulled from the Terrace and would have gone into Help, if she didn't after. Think hard and long if there might not have been other Help girls in your sorted past.
SL

Sporto, ummmm. Ur right. There were indeed TWO in my past. It does beg the question...well how many were there? Answer: 2. Only 2.

DonGringo, If only you had been so generous with the spelling lessons when KidCisco was with us. I am afraid you better not misspell anything from this point forward. I fear the precedent you have set here will come back to haunt you. You have created your own little hell.

Gcl;

I see that your counting system doesn’t include terma girls picked up at Help. I strongly believe that you had at least two MC girls (amazon + spinner asking you where you wanted to place you load) from Help as I remember it, but then again if this kind of cross-over pick ups should be counted we are probably talking very high numbers her :-).

SFHombre,
"Malapriapism"...I love it! This word definitely belongs in the OED.

Malapropism
not malapriapism
'a malapropism if you will'

aw fuck it - you guys are beyond help.

Did that last comment contain a double entendre?

Beyond "Help". Meaning the disco?

I think you miss us afterall Deeg....

Dongringo -- Apparently you wouldn't know an intentional misspelling (not to mention a reference to classical mythology) if it stuck a finger up your ass. But then again, there's probably no room for more fingers in your ass...

After my recent cleansing experience, I am choosing to take the high road here, and pretend you never wrote that Mr. SFHombre.

And yes Sandman, you are correct in observing the double entendre. I do miss you guys too (sniff).

I'd suggest a group hug were it not for SanFranHombre's history of having tranny's up to his room.

We have to cut Deeg some slack here. Any guy who's been out of action for as long as he has (not to mention his more recent traumatic experience) will start exhibiting signs of disordered mental processes. On an average day Deeg would have picked up on SF_Hombre's reference to Priapus.

Guys here should be aware of priapism, which is the disorder that affects GCL. Actually, I'm not certain that GCL has priapism (a permanent woody in the absence of sexual stimulation). It's possible that GCL is simply sexually stimulated by anything and everything (black-footed ferrets, old Indian clerks, dumpsters, etc.).

Let's have that group hug, Deeg.

PS. I hope SF_Hombre's not offended at your suggestion that he's from San Francisco...

(Message edited by Bwana_dik on May 20, 2004)

Habana...u are correct sir. Hooking up with a unit already known to you from a Terma is not the same as hooking up with a Help girl and rolling the dice. I have indeed gone with several terma girls from Help. It is the safe bet and what I recommend to my friends. YOU However, are probably a champion in the Help girl dice roll as I know you have had a lot of experience.

Bwana. Where do I start? For you to suggest I am the guy walking around with perpetual wood is rather preposterous. I have never seen someone pull as many duplas into his den at a festa as you do. I am just a light weight and dont do well with two girls. Too confusing. I am after all, just a simple person.

I'm not offended by Deeg suggesting I'm from San Francisco, but I am hurt he won't invite me to the group hug.

My personal opinion is that he fears I might try to displace the finger shaped plastic prostate massager he now sports (Korean made, I might add). Or perhaps I'm wrong and it's not a prostate massager but only a device to increase his sphincter strength when he has it in "grappler" mode.

Clear this up for us, willya Deeg?

Gcl; Coming from you 'several' terma girls is a scary thought. 50? 100? 200?. And yes, I too have been inside help, can’t deny it. I went though 3 phases; first they acted like they liked me, then after some weeks they hated me knowing I knew all the BS helping friends etc, but in the end, after a few months, they thought I was there to stay so they came back kind of like BS friends :-). I’m still not sure if they really liked me… guess not. Multifaceted place.

Hey guys, Has anyone else had any problems with change when paying the admission for Help. The guy short changed me twice. He got away with it the first time because it took me a little while to catch on. I caught him the second time, and by his actions, he is doing it on purpose. Both instances, I gave him 2 $R50 for 2 entrance tickets (total $R56). He gave me back $R34 in change both times. Keep an eye out for your change.

Thomas, hate to tell you but if you buy those tickets before midnight, they are only R$18 each.

You obviously bought after midnight at R$28 each. (but then, you may have know that and just chose to enter after 12:00 midnight)

Shortchanging in Rio is not a Help only phenomenon. It happens everywhere. These people realize most Americans don't usually count their change. Here it is mandatory. The waiters in most restaurants will pad or add a few more beers to the bills as well. Always check your bill and request a fresh coaster with every beer to help keep count.

Amazing how much they get away with because we don't pay attention......

Sandman, I got there around 1:00 AM which is why the R$28. It is funny.... you have to watch your back constantly in Brazil, but I love the place. I just got back last week, and am going again in July. I will post in a few days, after the smoke cears.

Hey Sandman, glad to see you're still here..
Kenn (EZ-Rio)

What is the normal dress code there? I'm under 30 years old and in shape. I usually don't dress like a typical sex tourist. What do people my age usually wear there? Slacks and a short sleeve shirt and dress shoes? Long sleeve? Thanks.

Anything but shorts is in fashion (no shorts allowed). Most guys will wear slacks (casual) and a short sleeve shirt (casual, polo, etc.). A few guys will show up in more formal wear, but who are they kidding? Help is a disco/whorehouse, not a fancy nightclub. In shape, out of shape...não importante...what matters is the kindness in your heart and the reais in your wallet.

no sandals either except for carnival week.

Don't overdress or girls will think you're brasileiro from Sao Paulo. Girls inside Help don't seem to like Brasileiros somehow.

Jeans are very in style. I'd say it's half guys in nice jeans, half in slacks.

Mitchc says no sandals, but I wore leather sandals every night my last trip (summer/Dec) and many nights on previous trips (Sep, May).

As for shirts, you'll see longsleeves, shortsleeves, I often wear nice cut-sleeves shirts or t-shirts (not tanktops, though I think I've seen those, too).

Athos is right, don't over dress, especially if you're young, hip and in shape.

I would recommend avoiding sandals, primarily so you don't get your feet stomped accidently (or maybe on purpose) by some garota in heels.

As far as dress code, you do tend to see a lot of athletic wear - jeans with football/basketball jersey, that kind of thing.