The ol' "Shit on the Shoe" trick.

As I walked down the street, a shine boy gestured toward my shoes. I waved him off but he kept pointing at my feet. I looked down to see a pile of crap on my toe! He quickly cleaned it off and then demanded 10BRL(!) retribution.

When he points down at your feet, he's actually flinging poo on you. When it happens to you, have him clean it off and polish your shoes. Thank him sincerely and then walk away without paying a cent. They'll get the picture soon enough.

"How much for the stale bread and mushy olives?"

Five of us sat at one of the restaurants and ordered our meal. The waiter arrived with two small dishes of black olives and two large baskets of sorry-looking bread. Because we were starving, we ignored the poor quality of the fare and dug in. When the bill arrived we were more than surprised to discover we'd been charged 25BRL for the privilege of eating unpalatable bread and tasteless one-seeded indehiscent fruit.

If they put it on the table, ask how much it costs.

"Feel free to tip generously"

Someone with a modicum of intelligence and a smattering of Portuguese decided to take a close look at our restaurant tab. The included service charge, it turns out, was calculated at somewhere around 20% instead of the usual 10%.

If they try to rip you off with a faulty calculator, deduct the total amount of the tip and give the waiter the appropriate 10%. That should keep the management on its toes.

Beach Scams,

Be on the look out for the "friendly" beach attendants nthat roam in front of the Othon Palace / Meia Pataca. Be on thye lookout for Paulo (Tall black guy that liks to wear a Michael Jordan jersey). Amongst some of their tricks are: ....can you buy that nice girl over there (she smiles) a sandwich or a nice cold drink. You just bought sandwiches and drinks for 20 people. .....always ask how much things like chairs and umbrellas will cost for the day, use sign language or whatever but get a figure. I know your money (US) is worth a lot here but its easy to be taken for a ride. There are always the exceptions to the rule but keep your guard up for the beach rip-offs.

later

I only saw the shoe shine guy once my second trip. I had walked on the beach and sat down at one of the huts in the plastic chairs and had a coconut. The guy approaches me and bends down to shine my shoes-of course I'm wearing sandals-and I yell at him to leave in Portuguese. I got up and didn't let him close enough to let him throw anything on me. Then he came closer and started yelling at me, so I picked up my empty coconut and threatened to throw it at him. He backed off some then, but was still shouting "fuck you" and other curses in English actually. By this time the guy in the hut-restaurant came out and told him to leave and he left.

I walked on the beach most days and when guys approached me I just ignored them and kept walking.

Wombat that is good advice checking the restaurant bill and verifying prices before you order. I'd add you should always check your terma bill as well. I was overcharged on drinks a couple of times. I't was only a couple bucks, but it makes sense to check any bill and the Termas fixed it.

Remember that if you look like a Gringo, you'll be targeted, so expect scams. The locals know you probably don't speak Portuguese and that the Real is weak against the dollar now so they'll try to pad everything. They also know that Gringos tend to prefer paying instead of confrontation. If you know you are being scammed or overcharged, I would dispute it immediately and argue about it-even in English if you don't speak Portuguese. They may not understand the words, but they know what you mean and they probably will back off rather than go through the hassle.

Ok, I have a good story to share about a girl who works here that should probably be avoided in the long term.

First of all, for short term experiences, she is great. She really loves having sex with girls and keeps the party going all night. I spent two nights with her and another girl and both were excellent experiences. However, after a few drinks she starts to get depressed, misses her baby, etc. and is not that fun to be around.

The reason I am posting is due to a story that she told me in part and that was completed by her associates. She speaks english excellently and evidentely worked at Luomo for a period around 1.5 years or so ago. The story is that she met a doctor or dentist who lives in Las Vegas (she told me his name, but I will not post it here) and he took her off the program for a year (after which she returned to work at 65 instead of Luomo. He sent her substantial sums of money, paid for medical attention, english classes, etc. and was planning to bring her and her baby to america. After one year, once he had begun to set everything up for her to come, she told him that it was impossible because the father of her baby would not allow the kid to leave the country. After that the money stopped flowing to her and she had to return to work. So this is the story according to her.

After she left and I went with two other girls from 65, they both told me that she was married and living with her husband now, and for the whole time she was in this relationship with the American, and that is why she couldn't leave, and how upset she was about the fact that the money stopped coming in and she had to go to work. Upon my next visit to 65, after a few drinks, I asked her about this and she told me that it was the truth, but she really loved the American, etc.

Anyway, I am sure stuff like this happens all the time, but every time I hear a story like this it never ceases to amaze me. I mean, this guy must have sent her more than 10k (at a minimum) and only spent two trips with her. Guys fall in love and get blind I guess, but please remember not to trust these girls too much and definitely don't get involved in the long term with this girl. She works at 65 now, I forget her name, but she is around 5'4", with medium brown hair, several tatoos (including one of a four leaf clover on her shoulder), she is very white, cute, and has a 3 or 4 year old baby.

Another story I almost forgot. A help girl I have known for 3 years was off the program for 6 months, then I saw her my last trip and asked her where she was, etc. Some German guy had taken her off the program and paid her expenses, etc. but he broke it off due to the following:

He was staying in Brasil with her for three months or so but had to go home to visit his children. When he left, he either opened a credit card in her name on his account or gave her his, but regardless she had a credit card he was responsible for. He told her to use it to but whatever she needed, etc. but to be reasonable. So the girl spends what she believes to be a reasonable amount according to her, buying stuff for her house, paying family bills, etc. and the guy gets the bill and is all pissed off. After much coaxing she told me that in one month she had spent over $15,000 USD on this guys card! The incredible part is the way she explained it to me, how she thought it was reasonable because she only paid for necessities, etc. but it just all added up (one bill here, another there, etc.), and she still doesn't understand why he was so upset as she was only paying for "the necessary things that he said I should buy".

(Message edited by gr8ter on June 05, 2005)

Gr8tr..."...he either opened a credit card in her name on his account or gave her his, but regardless she had a credit card he was responsible for. He told her to use it to but whatever she needed, etc. but to be reasonable. So the girl spends what she believes to be a reasonable amount according to her, buying stuff for her house, paying family bills, etc. and the guy gets the bill and is all pissed off. After much coaxing she told me that in one month she had spent over $15,000 USD on this guys card! The incredible part is the way she explained it to me, how she thought it was reasonable because she only paid for necessities, etc. but it just all added up (one bill here, another there, etc.), and she still doesn't understand why he was so upset as she was only paying for "the necessary things that he said I should buy".

I was WONDERING how my ex-wife was getting along