Chapter 3

How many day have I been here anyways? It’s morning. I can acknowledge that, at least because I know that comes after the darkness. The incessant horns from taxis below have replaced my alarm, of which I have no use for while on vacation. Taxis; now there’s an example of the tout mentality. Most reasonably intelligent persons would agree the system of hailing a taxi when you need one is efficient and universally accepted. Here it’s replaced w taxi after taxi, after taxi, speeding down the road shooting a horn blast at every pedestrian like he was playing a video game, to entice a fare. You will never and I mean never have to wait for a taxi in Cartagena.

Segue to where I ended previously. The morning ritual of cleaning out the cobwebs was thrown into panic mode as a result of the ATM screen informing me I was not getting another peso until I call my bank. WTF ! Back to the room and quickly booting up the lap top; user id / password / security question…Incorrect? It’s the right answer, I know where I was born. Are you kidding me? They weren’t. After scouring the web site I realize whoever wrote the program has never left his town, let alone the country ! Guys, there are two options in this situation: 1. Call their non-toll free number 2. Join the touts!

Juan to the rescue ! I needed to pay him for the balance of the room because the paypal I suspect was suspicious of his request for funds from CTG, to a US email, trying to be satisfied via URL addressed from Columbia. Picky, picky. Just relaying some quirks in the system to drop in long term for future planning. Anyways, Juan let’s me use his phone to call the US. Fix that and pay him his due, along with a sincere Mucho Grasias. Head for the ATM @ the Hilton to get peso’s… ATM is out of cash ! Our morning, now turning to afternoon. I need a drink…

BBQ joint across from the hotel has a nice patio and it seems many Chicas live in the building above or next to it. Had some grilled fish and few local brews while people watching and game planning. Took a nap, some emailing for work…Then a long walk down the beach @ 4 ish. Kinda empties out a 4 and it was a Monday. Nice sunset, but no chicas. We headed out to LDV at 10:30 to dissect the talent. Glad it’s a 3 min walk as there were 3 bitches and 4 guys. About face and out the door! Whoa, whoa what have we sitting over here. Two chicas one looking like some movie star I can’t place, the other a 7 named Maria. Hola, how much ? Lets go ! Cant place the actress but this chica is sexy, albeit a little older! My Amigo has her under arm but I want to hit it too. As the door shuts to the apartment I was balls deep on Marias chin in the living room, as Salome was tea bagging my wing man 3 feet away. Who the hell does she remind me of…. Good session, 100K each, and off to Centro for good eats. Realizing it was now midnight we decided our sustenance would consist of barley and hops. Back in another taxi vs. walking in circles, we pull up in front of Isis, which they pronounce e-sis btw. Yea I know we were going to avoid this place….Stepping in to the darkened laser swirling interior we are immediately accosted by Tania and Erika..true love…of pesos that is ! Some groping and bull shitting, a review of the arrayed talent lingering about and we bail out . Grab a taxi to a place a driver recommended, and I think a previous post had also mentioned. It’s out in town somewhere near the port, I know this only by the overwhelming fish smell as we neared. After a 10 min ride from Centro we throw the anchor out at Play Club. This place reminds me of the standard strip joint in the states, and the YMCA. 20 guys in there vs. 10 Chicas! 25K for 2 beers. Again, a little groping and negotiating without a deal, we weigh anchor for LDV. There were actually a revolving door of “dancers” at Play Club possibly doubling by original head count, and some very attractive chicas, so by all means, follow your nose.

Elvis’s wife, what the fucks her name? That’s who she looks like! I’m hitting that tomorrow big time. Pricilla, 20 years ago anyways.

La Dolce Vita ! Like the corner bar back home that served you underage…. As the curtain rises for act two we enter to find a potpourri of finely dressed chicas, scrutinizing our every step. Remember it’s a Monday. I’ve been hearing my wingman whinning about heartburn since he dropped a load a few hrs back and now he’s miserable. A side affect from Hardening agents we have been eating like bar nuts since we got here. Well my dose has me getting stiff just looking around and no heartburn, thankfully, so I make a deal w/ Gabriella from Isla San Andreas. Where the fuck is that? Damn, this hobby can be educational…. Google it. Nice muscular dark 27 yr old who actually can speak a little English. As the bedroom door closes on me amigos evening my interest in geography has us online and using the Google translator to converse. I said a little English! An hr later the door opens and superman flies out babbling something about a three way. It took about 15 seconds to work out the details and we opt for the front terrace . This girl likes, I mean really likes this. Takes us both deep, with neither ever feeling neglected for a minute. She pockets her well earned stipend, and another day in paradise is behind us, however, the bitching about heart burn reignites.

Laughing and enjoying your report, thanks for posting. Have not been to CTG but it's on my short list. Definately sounds like a convenient place. Picking up chicas on the beach, need to try that... touts sounds like a pain in the ass though.