2003/02 TJDick - Chiang Mai, Thailand
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2003/02 TJDick - Chiang Mai, Thailand
| By Tjdick on Saturday, February 08, 2003 - 12:48 am: Edit |
If you're a sensitive kind of guy,
you will not fare well in Chiang Mai.
To be one of the happier guys,
remember these words of the wise:
"You didn't lose your girl, you only lost your turn."
Thank you, Progman. That thought helped me keep an even keel at places like Linda's Bar.
BOTTOM LINE: Although Chiang Mai is not a primary "monger" destination like Pattaya or Bangkok, it is a popular tourist destination and you can find plenty of action if you stay a while. Bar fines are about the same as elsewhere (300 to 500 baht) and lodging is cheaper, but the girls charge more with "short time" usually starting at 1000 baht. "Long time," i.e. an overnight stay, is often refused. The good ones are all taken by 10 p.m. and sometimes much earlier. There aren't enough stunners to go around; those girls get all the business they want with or without you, and frankly they can be cunts. Some of the most stunning bar girls here are what would be called ficheras in Mexico, meaning they are only there to schmooze and sell lady's drinks and won't go home with you.
HIV WARNING: "bareback" sex (without a condom) is totally out of control in Chiang Mai! Most girls do NOT carry condoms (!) and throw caution to the wind. Look at the sobering stats on page 4 of:
http://www.unaids.org/hivaidsinfo/statistics/june00/fact_sheets/pdfs/thailand.pdf
That report doesn't break it out into male and female sex workers and the percentage might be higher for the males, but the females probably far outnumber (and therefore outweigh) the males, and those figures are five years old and are probably worse now.
OVERVIEW:
Chiang Mai grows on you. After a couple of weeks I had a harem put together and it was hard to leave. Chiang Mai offers cool winters, no mosquitoes, and cheap lodging. It's a good place to take a break if you're on an extended trip. After a month of eating Thai food you might want some of the great pizza at Art Cafe on the corner of Kotchasarin and Tha Pae Road. This is a great place to stock up on reading material if you're tired of the same selection from Asia Books you see at every book store in Bangkok and Pattaya. (My favorite used book store is the Shaman Book Shop on Kotchasarin Road Lane 1.) There are buffets at the big hotels for around 120 baht, such as Fueng Fah toward the east end of Loi Kroh Road. There are good five-week Thai courses at the AUA language center for 3500 baht, including one on "small talk" --is that suited to us mongers or what?! :-) It's a good base for seeing the outdoors of northwestern Thailand. Winter evening temperatures get down in the 60's, which is nice if you like to snuggle under the covers. :^)
ACTION:
The action I found is split into five categories. I cover them in this order only to get the short ones out of the way first:
Soapies:
There are at least five in Chiang Mai. I checked out two around 4 - 5 p.m. and the selection was not great, so try later in the day if soapies are your thing:
Phucombe Hotel (1150 baht)
Chiang Mai Hills Hotel (800 baht)
Another called Sayuri was recommended by a local expat, and some guys on this site gave it a thumbs up as well.
Freelancers:
All were undesirable in my opinion. East side of the Tha Phae gate (off the west end of Loi Kroh Road and a few blocks north). I saw three twenty-somethings there around 9:30 p.m. last night (on a Saturday). One wanted 500 for short time and 1000 for long time, then she changed it to 400 and 850. I think she was "on something" and couldn't remember what she had told me only a minute before. None were for me. Another one approached me on the sidewalk late in the morning after New Year's, but that was a fluke. She was not for me. I felt sorry for her; she seemed like a pathetic street urchin badly in need of a dentist. She asked for 300 baht for short time. Never saw her again.
Strip clubs:
I wasn't looking for any and stumbled across two plain old western-style strip joints:
Starxjx (good luck pronouncing that) on Loi Kroh Road Lane 3A. Cover charge 100 baht. Saw a few guys leaving with tattooed girls around 10:30 p.m. I looked at the four remaining strippers, got my money back, and left.
Cozy Corner. West of the Tha Phae gate near John's Place (covered later). Look for a sign that says "Ladies Dancing." There is no cover charge, and you get what you pay for. :-| The bar fine is 350 baht during the week and 450 on weekends, but they might come out if you just poke your head in and blow a moose call.
Soliciting extra services from legitimate massage parlors:
These are not the numbered-girls-behind-the-glass variety ("soapies"), but places where you go to get a foot massage or oil massage. This is dicey and you may not find any that you would want to solicit anyway. If "extra service" is available, she may suggest it, she might not. You can hint by playing with your weenie; if she tells you to stop it, stop it and enjoy the massage.
Went to the Phucombe Inn on Loi Kroh Road (not to be confused with the huge Phucombe Hotel on Huey Kaew Road where the soapy is). I was getting an oil massage for 200 baht from young petite cutie with sandy brown hair. I asked her if she was twenty years old. She replied she was eighteen and I believe it. She spoke no English and toward the end of the massage, after I had rolled over face up and she was working her way up from my waist for a second time, she pointed down at my towel-covered groin area and said something I didn't understand. I couldn't tell if she was referring to my dick or referring to that massage place, as if to ask if I intended on coming back here again. She had occasionally peeked under the towel, and I got the feeling it had been to check my state of erection. I kept asking her in my broken Thai to clarify, again she pointed downward at my groin, and I heard her say HA loy baht --the Thai words for "five hundred baht." Oh, boy! Just what I had in mind! :-) I told her yes, but was still unsure if she intended what I was hoping...
She removed the towel that had been covering my private parts, gently cupped her fingers, and gave my balls a nice gentle handling while scratching my crotch area. It was nice. Then she jerked me off with some of the oil. Her dainty little hand made my member appear larger. It was naughty and fun. I asked her if I could take her back to my hotel room later and we made arrangements, but I later cancelled when it was OBE (Overcome By Events, i.e., I met someone else by that time). She had asked 1500 baht for short time in my hotel.
Went back to see her a second time. I got undressed in the massage room and stood naked once again before this cute pixie flashing her pretty smile. Her head came up to mid-chest on me. My dick swelled and I put her hand on it. She squeezed the end of it gently and lovingly, still smiling. Oh, man! I felt light and slightly dizzy. For some reason it was extra erotic and I felt really horny as I did in my teenage years. I lay down and she got started on the massage. I declined extra service that time because I was saving myself for an all-nighter with a cover girl. She responded by doing the massage in a more arousing way, as if to get me to change my mind.
I saved myself, though, to create an aggravated load condition (ALC). My theory is that it "banks" sexual frustration and therefore enhances the pleasure of a later release. Plus it shortens re-load time if your later tryst is an all-nighter.
I had a spat with the cutie that second time because she stopped the massage to use her cell phone, so when I went back there a third time I tried another girl who was not as cute, but a bit older. With age came experience! This was a better massage. She ended up with smooth oily rubs up my inner thighs and crotch, with her thumbs gently stroking my scrotum. This was nasty and it felt great! I went in very worn out from sex but got an erection anyway. She knew I was hard because as she finished one of these strokes my cock sprang up with delight, making a small tent with the towel that was covering only my cock at this point. I pulled it off to unveil myself. She gazed at it saucer-eyed as she continued the massage. I already knew by now that a hand job would be done if I asked, and it was, for the same price: 500 baht.
I was again saving myself for a date, so I resisted the urge to pop. The hour of massage came to a close and she offered to keep going for another hour for another 200 baht. I agreed. She didn't charge me another 500 baht, though; the handjob surcharge I paid covered the extra hour. When I would get burned out on the stroking, she would do some more massage elsewhere, then go back to stroking me upon request, which was nice.
Bars:
There are a bunch along the west end of Loi Kroh Road and around the corner (north) up Kotchasarin:
On Loi Kroh road: The Easy Corner, Linda's, Butterfly Bar, Why Not, Naree, Stairway to Heaven, Mango. Also the Bunny Club (indoor) way east on Loi Kroh Road, just west of the Mae Ping river.
On Kotchasarin Road: Spotlight Bar (indoor), Lucky Bar, Power Bar, and the misnamed Charming Bar
On the corner of Loi Kroh and Kotchasarin: Ba Ba Bo Bo
Across the wall (or the moat, if you will), west of the Tha Phae gate: Cozy Corner, John's Place, December Bar.
This is all subject to change, including the names of these places --and the scene has changed over the last month-- but as of this writing: Of the Loi Kroh bars, only Naree, Stairway to Heaven, and The Easy Corner have girls who could be bar fined and taken out. The rest have prick teasers who only get you to buy drinks and don't tell you they can't be bar fined, giving double talk and leading you on. Most places had no one I was interested in consorting with on my first trip a month ago in early December, but now the selection is better. The cuties are apt to turn you down here, and finesse and coaxing may be required! They're just not as motivated to do business. Most bars have pool tables and most of the girls are pool sharks.
Short-time prices are 1000 to 2000 baht, but I got long-time from a nicer one for 2000 baht. It's what you can negotiate, and if you don't pay her price she'll won't go. It ain't Pattaya. If you take the attitude, "The heck with that, I've never paid more than a 1000 baht for long-time. I'll pay what I'm gonna pay," you'll go home alone. They are just not as motivated to do business here.
NAREE BAR
Naree opens in the late morning before the rest of them. The girls there are slutty in demeanor, sporting tattoos and cigarettes, short shorts, and beautiful, smooth legs the color of caramel. I had one over to my room for a nice three-hour short-time for 1000 baht, and then long time the next night for 2000 baht. She had huge, natural breasts that stuck straight out, and were easily the biggest I've seen in Thailand. (She has Cambodian blood.) They have that wide base we were talking about earlier. [There was a thread about the Thai Ministry of Health citing western bras as the cause of certain breast deformities in Thai women.] Except hers stuck out so far! They had their own time zone.
Another girl I had from there was twenty-two (the second time she said she was twenty) with a perfect body. (Clothed) photos of her are included with this report. Really incredible satiny-smooth legs. I noticed her on my first trip to Chiang Mai when I was seeing the big-breasted one mentioned above. I also saw the busty one on my second trip; when that fizzled out, she went home for a while, and I finally got together with this one. We had been making saucer-eyes at each other without saying anything during these two trips. In my room I spent good deal of time smooching her incredibly smooth brown thighs and bottom. Her legs were as smooth as could be, and even up close --an inch away-- in the light from the lamp on my night stand, her smooth, brown thighs had a sheen as if she were wearing nylons. What a cute pussy she has. Among the best I've seen. When we got started, it quickly turned into what they refer to in Mexican slang as a "colchonazo," i.e., a T-H-R-A-S-H-E-R!! If she wasn't actually turned on by me, she sure gave an Oscar-winning performance! She could take it all, too, in spite of her petite figure. Her petiteness itself was a turn-on; next to her I felt like a large man. I pushed up for a few seconds to watch it go in and out of that tender swath of black pubic hair. It looked like a submarine! She didn't try to press her thighs together to prevent me from getting it all in there when I started coming. (I find that unbearably frustrating.) With her I had no problem maintaining erection with the condom. Bar fine 300 baht. I gave her 1000 for short time.
STD WARNING: Both of these girls would happily do it bareback and even seemed to encourage it, so beware. One of them tempted me in my room by flattery. We had been making out in our underwear on my bed. Her body was literally hot, like a hot water bottle. We were gently bear-hugging each other and kissing each other all over the face and neck, and I quickly swelled to half-mast. I decided it was a good time to do the unveiling, so I got up and slid off my underwear. She said, "I don't have big size condom for you." [Note: This was flattery; mine's not that big.] I got the distinct impression that she intended to do it bareback. The temptation was controllable in my case only because I had just gotten over the clap --that'll change you forever, believe me. No bareback sex feels as good as looking down at your healthy, clean pecker and seeing a strong stream of plain old straw-colored urine coming out. If you don't believe that, you just wait until you get it. I had my own condom, so no problem.
(Sorry to get back onto gonorrhea, but just for a minute, there's something I forgot to report earlier: After I had started on Cipro, which later proved futile, I was in Laos. I held my dick up to look at the opening and saw something that I had not seen before: raw, red flesh protruding out from the inside like hacked, bloody meat. It was like my dick was saying, "How could you DO this to me, man??" It was slightly terrifying to see that and realize that I was not looking at a photo, but my own dick. Then I started having thoughts about how this is my only dick and I'd better take care of it.)
After we did it, I produced a recent blood test showing I was still negative for HIV antibodies just because I happened to have it handy and thought it might make her feel better, feel slightly relieved. She cast her gaze downward as if I had brought up a taboo subject. Whoa. Perhaps foolishly, I asked her if she was HIV+ or -. She said she's negative, but she said it as if she were lying. (You can sometimes tell if someone is lying. Police are trained to do it, so don't contradict me on this.) I said, "You don't know, do you?" She murmured, still looking down, "I know." Maybe she's never been tested and didn't want to think about it.
I brought her home a second time and she tried to get me to insert bareback! Hmm. Was she trying to get me to "join the club"? Couldn't help but wonder.
That second time was for a very short time --we were in my room no more than thirty minutes total-- and I had to bribe her with 1500 baht! And tolerate some snotty behavior as I coaxed her away from two other guys (who had not bar fined her) when I abruptly barged into Naree at 10:30 p.m. when things were in full swing. I had already exhausted all other possibilities that night, so I had no choice except to go home alone, which would have been wise on that occasion from a value standpoint. It ain't Pattaya.
A couple days later I proposed long-time. She said that she could that day, so I came back by later. Staying on Loi Kroh Road, you sort of pops in and out of these places throughout the day. She told me she wanted 5000 baht for long time! Out of the question! She's not the only game in town so I saved my money for another one. She could act like such a cunt! (For instance, once we were in relationship, she would start a conversation and then when I began to respond she would put her head down on the bar to sleep as if to ignore me, like she didn't have time for me. Another time I ran into her in the daytime and she invited me to get on her scooter with her, so I did and we rode around; I suggested we go to my hotel for a quickie and she wouldn't even answer me! What a cunt! Who needs that shit? There's one cure for that: shut the water off, i.e., don't give her any more money or attention. There are too many other women here to fret over that. Thailand makes for good relationship training.)
Days later, after a debacle at the Easy Corner (see below), after more mind games like taking turns ignoring each other, we got together for some afternoon delight. She was responding to my acting like a cunt. Have some of mine, bitch. Just some mind games. I had said I wanted to take photos of her, but she didn't understand and just wanted me to take off with her on the back of my scooter. Didn't pay bar that time. We went to my hotel room to resume negotiations. She would allow no nude photos and we settled on short time for 1000 baht. To the most casual observer, we would have appeared to be two young, sex-starved lovers who had just made up. THRASHER again! Both sides outpoured with a lot of "Oh darling how could I have been so stupid oh I need you" --etcetera. It was emotionally nourishing! :^) We continued to play games, going through cycles of holding out on each other, ignoring each other, and reconciling in flames of passion, but it was understood on both sides, and it was kind of sweet when the game was understood.
THE EASY CORNER
Stopped here one night when I saw someone special. I couldn't quite believe my eyes. All of these bars lack a front door and have a storefront that opens entirely out to the street. She and some others were standing on the step at the front, flagging down male passers-by. I said hello in Thai to her as I walked in, pretending to be nonchalant. Up close I saw that her face was perfect. She was a world class cover girl.
I sat down at the bar. Someone took my order and I mentioned that I would like to buy her a drink as well. I didn't care at this point whether she was just a drink-pushing "fichera" who wouldn't go home with me. My eyes craved satisfaction! I was quite pleased when she came over; sometimes the manager wants these pretty ones to stay on the step flagging down men and won't allow them to stay back in the bar for too long.
Eye candy. To my amazement, she was every bit as beautiful as my first impression. She was (is) one of the prettiest girls I have ever seen in my life, bar none (including movies, TV, magazine ads, etcetera). I was smitten. Her English was pretty good, but my English was suffering because I was dumbfounded! (I only speak a few sentences of Thai.) I explained that I just don't talk much. She was off the divinity scale. I was trying to control the number of compliments I dished out, not wanting to overdo it, but I told her at least twice that she was very, very beautiful. I finally whispered that universally understood English phrase: "Pay bar?" She said she was on her period and couldn't go, but could go on Friday (this was on a Wednesday night). I asked if she could do "long time" on Friday, and she said she wasn't sure. I tipped her a couple of times with 100 baht notes, and called it a night by 10 p.m.
The next night, Thursday, I went back to the Easy Corner after a day of walking around stunned. She was there and we repeated the above, holding hands, and I slipped her a couple of 100 baht notes. But she mentioned that she didn't think her period was going to be quite over by the next night, and that she wanted to spend Saturday and Saturday night with her son because it was a special school day, but Sunday we would get together. She had told me she had a five year old son, and tonight I had brought a Thai letter book with me for her to give him as a gift. I was doing anything to ingratiate myself with her. I told her I would just come on Sunday. She said, "I make time for you." See you Sunday. She said OK and gave me a long, slow, wet kiss on the lips. I was delirious and went in for another. Then she gave me a third. I had my arm around her waist. She was thin enough that my arm reached all the way around and I could touch myself no problem; she was very slender.
I came anyway on Friday and Saturday on the chance she would be there. Some of the other girls tried to tempt me and they were cuties, suggesting "pay bar" up front so that I would know they weren't teasing, but I had tunnel vision at that point. I only had eyes for the main squeeze.
Sunday I showed up in the best duds I brought. I had shaven twice, including shaving all the peach fuzz from my neck and ears. My hair was perfectly done. I had a clean shirt and zero body odor. Long story short, she stood me up. Nobody knew where she was. I asked if she might be there the next night (Monday). One of the cuter girls there (who had tried to tempt me into going with her) told me frankly that she didn't expect her to show up the next nigh either. She was right. Next night she didn't show. One of the lady bartenders who had been especially nice, helping me pass the hours I waited by practicing Thai with me, said "She go home." This immediately made me think that she had gone on a trip with another man.
A few months earlier I had taken a stunner from Pattaya to Ko Samui for a few days. We came back to Pattaya on an afternoon, and I went to her bar that evening before she reported to work and asked for her. Mamasan told me, "She go home," meaning to see her family elsewhere in Thailand. Everyone there knew that she had really been staying with a farang (me).
[A farang is western foreigner like us.]
Back to the present situation in Chiang Mai. After a gamut of excuses had been offered and I had produced my phrase book asking which nights of the week she works on, some of the other bar girls finally got together and, on this fifth night in a row that I had been there, humanely put me out of my misery with The Truth: she was staying with another farang, and no one knew when she would be back. It could be one or two weeks for all they knew. I knew the girl had been pulling my chain and I didn't want to know the truth earlier, but I still felt dejected that I was probably not going to see her. Fuck.
My experience in Thailand has been: Yes, world class super models can be found for hire, although it is rare, but the competition for them is FIERCE! Just getting a minute alone with her to get a proposition in edgewise can be challenging to impossible, so I guess I was lucky in that respect.
The next day the lady bartender (who lives above the bar, which is common here) told me about the farang. I did not need to hear this, to say the least. It was a Dutchman who comes to Chiang Mai on a regular basis. I displayed a thick wad of thousand baht notes that I had intended on blowing on the super model, and the bartender said for me not to do that. On the bright side, it was kind of neat that the other girls had leveled with me and were supportive of me, and I felt sort of honored by that. The next night I went back and rang the bell in the bar, indicating that I would buy drinks for them all. (It was expensive, though! 1400 baht! Ouch! It was worth it to hear them cheer.)
No long trip is without such disappointments for me. I try for the prettiest, and they can be hard to land. It was a dull, minor heartache that just had to be ridden out. And "ride it out" I did! :-) I went to the Spotlight Bar (see below).
I did finally get together with her more than a week later. It was kind of anti-climacted; she didn't look so radiant without her make-up. This was good because it mollified my desire for her, and I did enjoy her company anyway. That was the one day of the trip I was not feeling well, and I couldn't come, but it was OK. She had tiny little buns that were covered by one of my hands, and we snuggled and slept under the covers all night. We didn't come out until noon. She put all her make up on and WOW! Instant babe! I remain glad to have spent a night in her company.
THE SPOTLIGHT BAR
Bar fine 500 baht. If you don't get there by 10 p.m. the good ones are both taken. On my first trip here an British expat told me, "There's a lot of trouble there," meaning possessive guys fighting over girls. How could that happen with regularity at the same place? Don't know, but I saw it happen first hand: some guy came to pick up a girl he had apparently made arrangements with earlier, just as she was leaving with someone else. Barking ensued between the guy and the girl, the two guys, the jilted guy and the manager, and the manager and the girl (he chewed her ass out good), but ultimately, he who bar fined her first that evening (the guy she was leaving with) prevailed without fisticuffs. The jilted guy was over it by the next day. I know this because that was me. :^)
Of the two I considered do-able, one would do long time and the other would not.
After my debacle with the super model at The Easy Corner (same night --I finally got together with her a week later), I got one of the ones I liked here who looked like an 1940's movie starlet. She just had that aura. Short time 1000 baht. She was very sweet, twenty years old (believable) and slender, with a very pretty, pure Thai face with round eyes. Light brown hair and dimples, petite legs and bottom.
Back in my room we had fun, taking our time. We practiced making Thai letters for a while. This was another one I had been eyeing and tipping for a few days. When she was disrobed to the point of having only her top and bra on, she indicated that she wanted the light turned off before she would remove her top. (At first I thought it was going to be as with a street girl in Tijuana and she wanted more money to take her top off.) I always want the light on so I can enjoy the view. I comforted her and got her to remove it anyway, and I saw what she was hiding: she had had some breast surgery, possibly an enhancement, and the jerk who had done her breasts left them with hideous lumps of brown scar tissue above each nipple. The lumps were larger than the nipples and also included inch-long scars where he had made incisions. Poor thing. I didn't react in any way when she unveiled them, but after a few minutes we put her top back on without the bra and commenced.
LINDA'S BAR
For me, this damn place was nothing but a source of pain, anger, and humiliation. It's next door to The Easy Corner, but the personality of this place is totally different. There were two lookers there with a very condescending attitude; I never got to them. Once I waited for a big old man to leave because he had them and another girl clinging to him. One of the cuties told me she would come see me after he left. Before he left, a pack of young guys came in who evidently had dibs on the two cuties, because they would no longer go with me --even for short time-- saying, "I have customer" and "My boyfriend here now."
STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN
There were a couple ladies of Indian descent; made arrangements with one for long time and she asked for 2000 baht. I thought it over for a minute (which she didn't like, of course). I said OK. A minute later she amended long time to 2 a.m. for the same price, so I said forget it and got my bar fine back. That bar and The Spotlight have small dancing stages where girls dress fully clothed.
THE BUNNY CLUB
This is a very small new club with only a couple of girls (one of whom was just "bought" by a wealthy farang), located way east on Loi Kroh Road only a block west of the Mae Ping River, so it's in a totally different neighborhood. Bar fine 500 baht. They don't get as many customers because it's out of the way, so they have a rule that you can't take anyone for long time before midnight. Two-hour short time only. I said, "Look, it's 9:30 p.m., by the time I get her back here it will be midnight anyway, so what's the difference?" Mamasan called the boss and said sorry. I sat in the club brooding with the girl when I got an idea. I offered to pay double-bar, i.e. 1000 baht, for long time. Mamasan told me the bar fine is only 500, so I paid that and took her for long time without having to wait until midnight! After the big boss she called on the phone supposedly said no. What?? This is Thailand.
WEST OF THE THA PHAE GATE
None of these places had anything for me, but I list them because the "scene" may change by the time you go. You may want to get away from Loi Kroh Road if it gets old.
John's Place: Just a quiet outdoor pub with a bunch of men chatting and a bench out front with four older and heavier freelancers. Poor bench.
Thai Time: Around the corner from John's. Tiny pub with a cutie tending bar and a couple of guys gabbing.
Cozy Corner: A plain old western-style strip joint fifty feet from John's Place and described above under "Strip Clubs." Have a look if you're already there; it's free.
December Bar: Harder to find, and you'll be sorry if you do. I didn't even get off my bike to go in. The ladies were like the ones in front of John's Place.
GENERAL NOTES ON CHIANG MAI
On Loi Kroh Road there were a few obvious lady boys in the mix, but not from Naree; not sure where they came from. I saw an old farang man leave with one and wondered if he knew what he bought.
One of the idiosyncrasies of Chiang Mai: The ones that can be bar fined almost never spend the night ("long time") the first time; they always say "tomorrow long time" and counter with "short time" for tonight. If you decline short time, she might still meet you the next night for long time. But some won't do long time at all, ever, period.
If you can be tactful and build a rapport, you can proposition some waitresses working in the smaller restaurants on Loi Kroh Road. This is touchy and calls for delicate judgment. Thai language proficiency won't hurt either.
If you're "butterflying" around Loi Kroh and Kotchasarin Road, which intersect, have your own wheels so you can cut that corner off by taking the tiny streets within (inside) the block; that way your acquaintances from other bars don't see you smuggling a new girl home. Be careful because you will meet oncoming traffic coming around corners! IF YOU THINK YOU KNOW HOW TO DRIVE ON THE LEFT SIDE OF THE ROAD, YOU DON'T! Out of habit your hands will jerk you the wrong way in the event of an impending head-on collision! Watch it! I saw two scooter accidents (both scooter vs. car) in one day here, and those were between locals. If you rent a scooter here (150 baht/day), you have to leave your passport or driver's license, as opposed to Pattaya where one only need leave a small deposit, usually two days' rent. Throughout Thailand a scooter is known as a "motorbike." A motorcycle is known as a "big motorbike."
Chiang Mai is a pretty big city so there could be more action elsewhere. Every day I saw farangs with cuties I had not seen in any of the bars. A lot of farangs live here because it's a nice place to live, and some of these girls were girlfriends. Others were "imports," i.e., girls brought from elsewhere for a short vacation. I found numerous other clubs where I was welcomed by the locals, but they were dance or karaoke clubs. Got time? Mingle.
Good scooter cruise: Take the road past the Chiang Mai Zoo and CMU and see the big waterfall, or go up into the foothills.
LODGING:
There are many places on Loi Kroh Road that are a short walk from the aforementioned bars. The Traveller Inn and others have fan rooms for 250 baht, bigger air-con rooms are 500 baht; all include a private hot shower. I dislike hot weather and even I find air conditioning unnecessary in Chiang Mai, especially at night. There are guest houses everywhere. Wherever you stay, be discreet when bringing someone back to your hotel; this is not Pattaya. Most of the guest houses expressly forbid bringing ladies back, and the hotels may take a dim view of it as well. I rode in with mine, which made it easy to come in the back way from the scooter parking area. They were dressed in a decent manner and once inside we headed straight to the elevator.
One of the 250 baht rooms I had was tiny, but that made it nice in its own rite, because it reminded me of my room when I was a teenager. I brought someone from Naree back there and the tiny simple room made it seem like a teenage fantasy, like I was lucking out with the cutest cheerleader in school when my parents were gone and I had the house all to myself (which never really happened, by the way).
You can also rent a room for 3500 baht/month at Chiang Mai Mansion (or just about anywhere in Thailand, for that matter) that includes a refrigerator, nice TV, bed (you buy your own sheets), and bath with hot water, and a balcony and some furniture.
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=== My first-timer's report from a couple of months ago (Dec. 2002): ===
Linda's Bar had some passable 6's and 7's who seemed unfriendly for Thailand, so I moved on to the Butterfly Bar and sat down. Don't write any of this down, just see "what it is" when you get here, but this is a noteworthy first-time experience:
While chatting with another Yank I noticed that one girl in particular was exceptionally attractive and appeared to be about twenty years old. She is a light-skinned, very Asian-looking sylph with black hair, so her actual age might have been as high as twenty-three (in my estimation).
She was naturally taken. When she looked behind the guy she was with, she could see me, and I signaled her every chance I got, beckoning her to join me instead. The guy I was chatting with agreed that she was the clear winner and said that he had noticed her on a previous evening, and that she was taken then as well. (He had already latched on to another gal.) I was sure I would not get her away from that guy; she looked like a young cover girl. I could suck her cunt 'til her head caves in. She was an honest 8.
"Good things come to those who wait." The girl with my new buddy asked me what I wanted, so I pointed to Miss Clairol. To my amazement, after some lobbying by my buddy's girl, the babe came to me! The bad news (long story short): After buying her a drink I asked her to come home with me. She would not. That explains why the other guy let her go. She is apparently only there to hustle drinks. She said her name is "Nancy." My buddy's babe spoke pretty good English, so I made sure I understood what the score was: she was not coming. Buddy's babe asked me if I had already bar-fined her (400 B), which I hadn't, then she suggested some other girls, which of course I was not interested in.
====== The next night (Dec. 2002): ======
Went back to the Butterfly, one of the dozen or so bars on the west end of Loi Kroh Road. Bought a drink and played pool with another girl I saw last night --one that was suggested by an older Thai woman working there when the babe wouldn't come home with me. She appears about eighteen or nineteen. She wouldn't go either!
Walked a few steps west to (? One bar west of Linda's). An ex-pat there who speaks fluent Thai told me that that's how the Butterfly and the surrounding bars are --they're just "drink whores," he said, and *this* bar (the one we were in) was one of the good ones, i.e., *these* girls are bar-finable.
I noticed the one he was chatting with was rather attractive and top-heavy, in her late 20's, no apparent tattoos. He was getting up to leave and I mentioned that she was cute. He said, "Well, *she's* not too interested in going." What the f***?
Another girl working there asked me what I want to drink, I ordered, and she told the nice one to bring me my drink (this is all in Thai). Without even acknowledging my presence, the nice one said something to the effect of "No, *you* get it for him" or "You sit with him." Then she resumed her place out front on the sidewalk, helping the other girls there flag cars down to attract more suckers to buy drinks.
Chiang Mai is not like anywhere else in Thailand. These girls can be unfriendly. One ex-pat who had been living here a couple of months told me that the girls here want to get to know you first, and want you to stick with them as a steady boyfriend. Could this be HIV-caution?
I checked out some bars on the east side of the river: the Riverside, the Brasserie, and another whose name I can't remember. Those appeared to be just dressy bars attached to fancy restaurants, not a pick-up scene.
Around the corner from Loi Kroh Road is the Spotlight, with girls dancing on stage. None attracted me there, nor at another dance bar a few blocks north of there (next to John's Corner).
tjdick@hotmail.com
| By Blazers on Saturday, February 08, 2003 - 07:42 pm: Edit |
This is the first complete section I have seen on Chiang Mai...excellent job. Very detailed. Sorry to hear about your time in Hat Yai...some mean ass people there.
| By Tazzzy on Sunday, February 09, 2003 - 09:45 am: Edit |
An awsome, detailed report TJ...I'll be there in a couple of weeks and this report will come in handy. Thanks for the taking the time to write a report the way a report should be! I'll attempt to do the same upon my return.
Great report TJ !! I have never been in Chiang Mai without female company. Twice with my ex-wife and twice with my ex-Thai girlfriend from US. Therefore I have never really explored the night scene in Chiang Mai so your report will be invaluable if I ever do. Not likely though. I have seen pretty much all there is to see tourist wise, and your report confirms that it is not worth it for mongering alone. Why try so hard when beautiful young girls are falling all over you in BKK and Pattaya chai mai ? BTW- on one visit with my ex-wife we were driven around by her younger brother and I found out that Chiang Mai has some really wild bars and brothels but for Thai men only. He said he could not take me to those as I would not be allowed in. This is the case in most outlying places we believe has no action. It is just no action for farang!!
TJ, you had considerably more luck than I had when I was there in early December. I found Chiang Mai to be a decent enough place to visit, but the mongering horrible. I stayed at the Traveller's Inn and checked out the bars on Loi Kroh Road every day. All dogs. Spotlight was all dogs. All the bars behind the gate across the moat had all dogs. I even went to Sayuri and stayed 30 minutes hoping something doable would appear. All dogs.
The short of it is that I didn't fuck a thing in Chiang Mai, and headed back to BKK to fuck my brains out with all the Chiang Mai beauties who live there and not in Chiang Mai!
| By Flashy on Friday, August 20, 2004 - 06:29 am: Edit |
TJ, a most useful and welcome report. I was in Chiang Mai a few weeks ago with girlfriend. It was unfortunately that time of the month for what seemed an eternity and I was in dire need of attention. Thanks to your report, while she was spending time at a spa getting dolled up, I was able to put the 2 hours I had on my own to most productive use, zipping off to the Phucombe Inn for an oil massage and very satisfying HJ. Ahhhh... and being back in time to pretend that I had spent my entire time writing email and postcards. Thank you!
Phucombe Inn:
The place is a legit massage place, obviously with some extras being offered to the willing. I was a little disconcerted upon arrival to find out that as in many other legit places, there are three mattresses in one room where people get massaged. I was a little worried at first that this would mean only a regular massage, but once I lied down, she kindly pulled a curtain across, separating us from the rest of the room. I was also there in the early afternoon and there was no one else there. While giving the HJ, she kindly accepted to pull up her shirt and bra so I could have a lick, nibble and squeeze of her very fine pair of bouncers. At 500bt (massage and HJ!), it was quite the bargain.