This report is written for those who have never been to Quito...If you are a vet, scroll on down.

Quito: An Introduction

Four consecutive nights of mongering had pushed me to the point of exhaustion. Here I was in a South American casa de chicas with a very lovely Latina doing her best to arouse my interest...and I was failing miserably to rise to the occasion. One of the downsides to turning 50 I told myself. To her I said, "No problema. La culpa es mia. Esta bien."

My plan was to get up, put on my clothes, slink past the Ecuadorian patrons waiting their turn in the lounge area, and go back to my hotel for a long nap. My chica of the moment had other ideas.

Carolina pushed my back onto the lumpy mattress that dominated the small, dingy room. She gently nibbled my ear, then inserted her tounge....slowly, methodically she worked her way down my body....eventually taking my manhood in her mouth until...He Scores..TOUCHDOWN! Total cost...$12 ($15 now in the same place)including one drink each for my chica and me...

A good friend of mine had a similar problem in the U.S. with a $300 escort. "I aint Jesus," she told him,"I don't raise the dead."

$15 for a half hour romp with a hot Latina determined to make you happy (a matter of professional pride, I suppose)is just one of the reasons I love Quito.

A $150 gfe overnight experience with some of the finest looking girls in town is another reason to consider placing Quito on your Hombre's list of places to visit....

Ecotourism belongs on the list, too....

Tucked into a valley high (9,000+feet above sea level) in the Andes Mountains, Ecuador's capital city has much to offer the adventure seeking hobbyist.

Here you can spend your days mountain biking, exploring the charms of Colonial Quito, or bargaining for leather goods in an Indian market. Take a siesta. Enjoy a meal of baby back ribs washed down by a Pilsener, a local beer.

Then head out for an evening of club hopping. Take your time. Find just the right and take her home with you por la noche, sending her on her way after breakfast. Catch a few hours of sleep...repeat....ah the good life! But I'm getting ahead of myself....

Getting There

Airlines...American and Continental offer direct flights from NY, Miami & Houston. Other carriers connect through Latin America.

Documents...A US passport valid for 6 months is required for entry. Ecuadorian Immigration will issue a Tourist Card for up to 90 days upon arrival. A $25 exit tax payable in cash will be assessed at the airport prior to departure.

TIP:Make a copy of your passport and put it in the saftey box in your room or hotel front desk along with your $25 exit tax. This way if you are robbed you can still get out of the country.

Money...The US dollar is the standard unit of currency in Ecuador, having replaced the Sucre in 1999. Master Card and Visa are widely accepted at hotels and restaurants, but you should ask if there is a surcharge. ATM's are readily available. Traveler's checks can be exchanged for a 1.5% commission at Vas Cambios, on Amazonas street near Venitmilla in the main tourist area...and at Banco Pinchincha at 12 de Octubre y Salazar, near the Swiss Hotel, for about 1/2%. A TIP: take a wad of crisp, new one's and fives with you to use for taxis and other small purchases. Change is sometimes hard to come by....

Language Skills. A little Spanish goes a long way! Most taxi drivers speak no English. The majority of hotels have at least one person on staff who speaks English, but day in day out it is best to plan to use espanol....

TIP: The Lonely Planet Latin American Spanish Phrasebook is an excellent resource for those, like me, who speak only a little espanol.Chicas think the section on "intimate Spanish" is cute....

What to Pack...US Condoms, Clothing that can be layered (Quito's weather ranges from 50 degrees F to 70 degrees year round). Bring a rain jacket or umbrella. A flashlight is useful...small bottles of hand sanitizer are very useful. Used frequently, hand sanitizer can prevent an episode of Montezuma's revenge.

GETTING AROUND

Customs...As you step off the plane in Quito you will know you are in the Emerging World...You will exit down the steps onto the runway, follow the pathway marked in yellow to Immigration. Immigration is not a problem...you will be issued a tourist card after answering a couple of basic questions about the purpose of your travel (hint: tourism will suffice...no need to mention mongering)...a few short steps to your left is baggage claim...Pick up your bag and go to Customs, about 50 feet away from the baggage area. I have never actually gone through customs...usually one of the guards waives me around. As you go outside you will see throngs of people waiting on passengers...

Cabs... They are waiting at curbside. The fee to the tourist or business sections should be $3 to $5. Tip: If you do not speak espanol, write the name of the hotel, it's address and the nearest cross street. For example, Hotel Alemeda Plaza, 12 de Octubre y Salazar...and hand it to the driver. If he does not have a meter, ask "?Cuanta cuesta? If he is helpful, a tip of $1 is in order once you arrive at your hotel.

There are lots of cabs in Quito. A fare of $3 or less will get you most anywhere in the business/tourist parts of town. Most are metered, but many turn meters off late at night. Without a meter, always ask the fare.

TIP: Make certain your taxi has a license...the number should be posted on the upper right hand side of the windshield in big numbers.

Where to stay....Quito is a large city that stretches for 20 plus miles up and down a narrow valley. There are three sections of town that have hotels...Old town, or the Colonial section of the city has a few tourist-class hotels. This part of town is dangerous at night and not recommended.

Mariscal Sucre is the main tourist area. It extends from Parque Ejido in the south to Ave. Orellana in the north. 10 de Agosto and 6 de deciembre form Mariscal's east-west borders.

Mariscal contains most of the hotels in town, ranging from $5 per night hostels to $100 at the Hilton Colon. At about $20 per night Hostal Jardin del Sol offers good basic accomodation. A clean room, hot water, cable tv with ESPN & CNN, breakfast included....I've stayed here several times. While I enjoy the staff, I no longer recommend staying in Mariscal. As the economy has worsened, the rate of robberies has gone up in Mariscal. Ecuadorian ladrones aren't stupid...they know gringos bring dollars and they know where gringos stay...Mariscal's nick name is Gringolandia!

Better, in my opinion, to look outside of Mariscal for a place to stay. I have found several hotels and hostals on 12 de Octubre to be a safer alternative. Hostal Santa Barbara charges about $40 per night, breakfast included. It is set in a beautiful old colonial mansion, just north of Ave. Colon.

Alemeda Plaza, 12 de Octubre y Salazar, is a more upscale alternative. I negotiated a long term stay for $65 per night, though the quoted rate is $100 per night for a one bedroom suite.Suite here are great, complete with kitchen, dining area, living room with work desk, and one and a half baths. Breakfasts are made to order and great! You can order room service at no extra charge or go to the penthouse for breakfast The Alemeda is located near the Swiss Hotel and the Radisson..It is just as nice and the prices are much lower. Chicas are not a problem here.....


TIP: Ask for a discount for whatever reason, usually for a weekly rate or a gringo discount or ? make up your own...web site http://apartec.com/index_4e.html# or email alamplaza2@punto.net.ec

Utell.com offers several choices...I can recommend the Dann Carlton...$60 per night, $10 for chicas at night, free during the day.Includes a great breakfast...Ask for a room with a king bed on the end toward Parque Carolina.

Safety...take a cab at night. Never walk alone at night. Stay out of parks at night, and in the areas around the parks. Repeat...even if your destination is only a few blocks away, take a cab.

Where to Eat...Lots of good restaurants with reasonable prices can be found in the Mariscal area...ARCATE at Baquedano 358 y Juan Leon Mera serves great pizza cooked in a wood fired oven. ADAMS RIB on Calama between JL Mera and Reina Victoria. Man food served by a colorful American xpat.$5 will get you a slab of ribs and a couple of Pilseners...MAMA CLORINDA's at Reina Victoria 1144 serves inexpensive Ecuadorian cuisine. For lunch try the cheese & potato soup served with half an avocado rising out of the center, like a green island in the midst of a yellow sea. About $3 with a beer.

OTHER TIPS: Papaya Net, on the corner of Calama Y JL Mera, is a good internet cafe. $1 per hour..call the US for 18 cents a minute. Safari Tours on Calama offers a variety of tours in Land Rovers with English speaking guides, about $50 for a day tour.

THE HOBBY:CLUBS

Clubs con 5 estrellas: Extasis and 515 are the two upscale clubs I have visited in Quito. A Dolls' House and Techo Rojo are other options, but I have not visited either.

Ecstasis comes to life after 11 and rocks until 5:30 AM. Most of the chicas start to come in around 10:30. Sip a Cuba Libre and take your time.

Once you have made your selection, buy her a drink. Talk a while. Then tell her you want to make love. You can take her out by paying a bar fine, but I prefer to try the girls out on premisis and call them later if I enjoy myself.

Your chica will accompony you to the front where you pay for your drinks and $15 for the room. The cashier will hand you a receipt, which you will need when you exit. He will give her a condom and tissue.

She will take your hand and lead you up the stairs to paradise. Upstairs an older woman will hand you a towel and show you to a room. Tip her a dollar.

Rooms are nice here..queen size bed...mirrored ceiling..& a private bath with hot water. Sessions here are not rushed...some do BBBJ's some do not...sex is always covered. Girls cost $70-80...total with drinks around $115.

515 is a less intimate, larger club. Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights are the busiest and have the most girls. Total cost is about the same as Extasis.

Overall, I prefer Extasis. There are more semi-pros working there, which I like. Friday night is a good night to find a girl who holds down a regular job during the week and sees clients on weekends.

Tip: The 5 * clubs are not Quito's greatest bargain. But they provide a means of making contact with attractive women who will come to your hotel the next night for $150...or who will travel with you on overnight trips to some of Ecuador's scenic wonders.

4 Estrellas (a bit generous for some of these clubs). Night Cat is accross from the new Marriott, at the traffic circle on Amazonas. Hit or miss, depending on the night. Pleasant enough staff, some of whom speak English. Expect to spend about $75 here, total. All Ecuadorian girls, as far as I can tell. Bandinis...look for the blue neon light on top of the colonial building on Juan Leon Mera, just a couple of blocks from the Hilton. An old colonial building with a bar and stage all the way to the back...and rooms upstairs. Very pleasant waiters...some of the girls are dogs...others quite attractive. Again, it varies. Buy a drink and wait. If you don't see what you like, go elsewhere..no minimum, no cover. Rooms are a step down from the 5 star establishments, but still have a private bath.

3 estrellas. Vibracion...Wilson between Juan Leon Mera and Amazonas.Almost all of the girls in this club are from LaCosta of Ecuador. There is a stage/shower show at night. Open early, around 7 PM...but it does not rock until late. Rooms here are very basic...mattress on the floor, no private bath...but with drinks, room, chica costs at about $50...not a bad deal if the chica is right. Some of the best sessions I have had have been here. Other nights, I move on...There is cover charge, but it includes a drink and is minimal..about $5 or so...so, again, if you don't see what you like, move on...

2 estrellas. 270 La Nina, between Almagro & 6 de Deciembre. Open in the afternoon, this can be just the place for a couple of cold beers ($2)and a hot woman ($10 fore 30 minutes). Most of the girls here look like $10 hookers, but I have found some very attractive women in this place who for one reason or another cannnot work at night in one of the 5 star establishments. Some of the rooms adjoin the bar/lounge area...so if your chica makes noise...all the guys sitting around in the lounge will know you are having a good time. I kinda like it....but to each his own.

1 estrella or less. On Almagro, diagonally across the street from Il Risotto, a fine Italian Restaurant, is a rowdy Ecuadorian bar that occasionally has a true diamond in the rough. Sex and a drink for $10 in a crib with a mattress. The bar area is always crowded with locals. Always...4 in the afternoon or 11 at night.

THE HOBBY: ESCORT SERVICES

I have used several escort services that advetize in the local papers

lahora.com.ec/clasificados/paginas/servicios.htm

Firts (note to perfectionists---this is not a typo..this is the way they spell it)Class. Not always accurate descriptions, and it does not always matter.

In May I asked for a young Columbiana, Tall, thin with blonde hair..."si, no problema," said the owner.She'll be right over...an hour later a short brunette with a full figure shows up....I told her I was sure she was wonderful, but she was not what I asked for. I had a particular type of girl in mind. She told me she would make sure I was very happy if I decided she could stay. I felt a little sorry for her, and it was late enough I didn't think I would find anyone else so I said ok....Best decision I made that week! There's a moral here somewhere, but it escapes me at the moment. Cost: $90-$125 depending upon the girl. The fee is supposed to be for three hours, but more often than not they will spend the night if you are a nice guy and promise them breakfast.

Top 3 Things I have learned:

1. Arrive on a Thursday and go to one of the 5 estrella clubs. Thursday is one of the better nights for variety. Try out a chica ...if you like her, get her number...and see her outside of the club. Going rate: $150 por la noche....

2. Beautiful women don't always make the best partners (see my story above).

3. Don't leave Ecuador without exploring the country. From the beauty of the Andes Mountains (higher than the Rockies!), to the Galapagos, to the rain & cloud forests, to the warm springs of Banos, to the Indian markets, to the beaches of Atacamas..Ecuador has much to offer..

TIP: All of the above sites are wonderful in their own rite, but much better to take along a chica....

SUMMARY

There is a saying in Ecuador that the women there are like helados, they come in many flavors. Mestizos (a majority of the population), blacks (6%) and whites (3%).... They are waiting....

Nice report, brings back a lot of memories.

Thanks,

Moondog

The airport departure tax when leaving Ecuador is now a whopping US$31.60.

Anyone has any updates about Ecuador, Quito or Guayaquil? Please write. Thank you.

Tomlatin, since no one has updated perhaps upon your return you can do this, thanks in advance as several of us are considering a trip ourselves.

This is a nice report. Did you forget to bring your camera?

thank you

Guys instead of Quito, I went to Guayaquil instead. The tax fee was $26 when I left on 9-13-07. If anyone has any question or need help, please don't hesitate to email me at tomlatin@gmail.com. Happy hunting!