Hi gang. RT here.

OK, it’s this simple. Everything you have read/heard about this place is true. End of discussion. But first, the daily travelogue.

Somehow, I managed to sleep seven hours and awoke not feeling like shit for the first time this trip. I confirmed my reservation for the jacuzzi for midnight.

After breakfast and a quick e-mail check, I took a quick walk over to the Blue Marlin to get grounded and (what else?), had a talk with a few more ex-pats from the USA. Today’s discussion: Dealing with the bureaucracy in Costa Rica. It seems that there is a lot of waiting on line for ANYTHING here. The consensus is that this place is rough to live in if you have to work, but a beautiful thing if you have enough money to get by.

Hearing enough from these lucky bastards, I decided to lose a few dollars in the casino and went on my way for my sightseeing tour of San Jose, and to get my hair cut at the topless barber shop.

I wandered, took a few pictures of town. It really has a New York feel to it – not midtown, but definitely the southern part of the city.

Following my map, I could not find the topless barber shop, so I just continued my walking tour, stopping at the Park Hotel to buy some souvenirs and at a more traditional gift shop to bring back stuff for some other people. There were few chicas at the Park Hotel at 2 pm. I’m not certain, at $30, that the pricing structure there is in line with the rest of the city. Yes, it’s only thirty bucks, but you have to draw the line somewhere. The girls at Bogart’s were equally attractive, and were only 6,000 colonnes for a half hour ($18). Also, I picked up a Spanish-English dictionary.

Needing new batteries for my camera, I had my first misadventure in San Jose. They tried to rip me off at the camera store. I asked for four batteries, and the girl gave me two, two-packs (at 760 colonnes each), instead of a four-pack for 1,060 colonnes. The language barrier made it difficult, and at times I considered just paying the extra $1.50, but I stayed firm but quiet and polite, and eventually reason won out. If that remains my biggest problem here, then I’m sitting pretty. I wanted to grab a bite for lunch, so I stop in some hole in the wall restaurant (not a tourist place) and have my best meal of the trip for only $6. It’s just down the block from the Blue Marlin, so I stopped in. The chica count at 4 pm on a Thursday: 25, and most of them mouth-watering.

I get back to my room around 4:30 and the message light was on. It was a call from Natalia (Yes, that’s her name. I’m sure now). She left her phone number, so I called, but either she wasn’t there then, or it was the wrong number. My Spanish could not be sure. I was worried that she was canceling, so I got out my notes and looked for a plan ‘B’, and waited.

The phone rang again at 6:00. It was her, calling to confirm 8 pm. This alone is reason enough to love CR. She called to confirm. Incredible.

Having a couple of hours before I was needed, I headed to an ATM and then back to the Blue Marlin to inspect the roster (purely as a research activity) and to gamble some more. Chica Count at 6:30: easily 50-60 and more coming in, and I left the casino WINNING some money. Another San Jose first!

THE BIG DATE

Just as I was turning on the shower at 7:30, the phone rings in my room. It is the bellhop, telling me that Natalia is here for me (have I mentioned that I LOVE this hotel). I say OK, and a minute later at the door is Natalia (early!!) and the bellhop with the log for me to sign her in.

She’s in yet another sundress and as beautiful and young as ever. I explain that I need to shower first, hand her the TV remote and shower and shave in record time. Here’s where it starts to differ from a regular date. First, very few totally hot 18-year-olds are willing to date me. Second, she sees me leave the bathroom, gets up and takes her clothes off and we go at it for a half hour. The answer to every question about this session is YES, so don’t bother asking, you know the answer.

My research indicated there was place called El Pueblo in town, with clubs and restaurants. I suggest this for dinner (using my dictionary). She agrees, and indicates I made a good decision.

We go downstairs and take a $2 cab ride to El Pueblo. Think of any of these new entertainment/dining complexes in the States, without the shiny-ness and attitude. And older. Not run down, but older. There are shops, bars, and restaurants. I feel right at home, except I have a hot chica on my arm. There is music blaring everywhere, half American and half Spanish disco.

We stop for a drink at a bar, and try to talk somewhat. I’m limited by both my lack of Spanish, as well as the thought of what I’ve done/will be doing with this girl. Incredibly, no one seemed to notice how odd it was for a lovely young lady to be with a dirty old man. Either they see it a lot, or EVERYONE is very discreet, or they just don’t care. For her part, she had no problem being out in public, so maybe it’s just a cultural thing. After the drink, we look at all the restaurants, and pick one. It was good, but a little overpriced, IMNSHO. After dinner, we go to the Disco Inferno (I think) and cuddle. The cover was 600 colonnes each (about $2), but included a drink, it turns out. This place is big, with lots of dark corners and couches. We grab a corner and make out for a while like teenagers. I finally spring the Jacuzzi idea on her and she smiles and agrees. We leave and take a cab back to the hotel.

We get back at 11:30, so we go to the room and cuddle and make out until midnight. Upstairs we finally go and into the Jacuzzi. What follows for the next hour again is the only reason I needed for this trip. I’m in a Jacuzzi on the roof of a hotel in Costa Rica. The view of the mountains is beautiful, and I’m going at it like gangbusters with a beautiful 18-year-old. Again, the answers to all questions are: YES, YES, YES, YES, YES, and I nearly drowned at one point. And would have died happy.

At one a.m., we descended back to the room and got into bed to relax. I realized that I was up to doing nothing for a loooong time, So I told her she could leave if she wanted, although she was welcome to stay until the morning. She asked if it was all right if she left, I assured her it was, and she left at about two. I’m not sure what ‘todo noche’ includes. Some have reported until the morning with a sleepover, others indicated that 2-3 am is a normal quitting time. Either way I was happy. I gave her 50,000 colonnes (about $150) for the six-plus hours, and she was more than agreeable to that price. I might have been able to offer her less, but it seemed like a good amount.

The language problem was both good and bad. It was bad, because we just couldn’t converse all that well. We muddled through, but that was all. It was good, because I suspect that I’m not all that interested in most things that 18-year-olds would want to tell me.

RTGOOCH TIP #9: Spring for a pocket-sized Spanish/English dictionary. Barnes & Noble had a tiny one, made specifically for tourism. It had entire phrases, and fit neatly in your packet. I forgot to get it before I left, but it would have been $7 well spent.

Well, that’s it for day 4. Tonight is the big lesbian oil show right on the bar at the Park Hotel. I will be there, but without a haircut. I hope the chicas still find me attractive 8--).

Take care,

RT