Gentlemen,

It has been quite a while since I’ve done anything more than log on for a minute or so. I was in Bogotá, Colombia last May and for a variety of reasons have not been checking in on the board. I hope you are all doing well and that each of your respective travels have been prosperous. Bogotá was excellent, and to the best of my ability I will recall the essentials of my trip such that it may assist those of you who will find yourselves there at some point in the future.

WHERE I STAYED:
Based on the advice of another, I made a reservation at Suites Real 85 (011-571-218-0100 from the US or http://www.suitesreal.com/index-e.html). For $29 per night you can get a one bedroom apartment with a small kitchen, 24/7 security, a full-sized bed, room service, hot water, etc. I spent a few minutes exchanging pleasantries with Javier, one of the security guys, and gave him the equivalent of a $10 tip for helping me to my room with my bags upon my arrival. This proved to be a great investment as Javier was able to help me out many times with directions and sound advice on which directions to walk and which to avoid. He also was very laid-back, as on one particular night when I bought three different chicas back with me at different times throughout the night without incident. Suites Real was great, perfectly located and I recommend them to anybody thinking about hanging out in Bogotá for some fun.

EXCHANGE RATE:
I will quote prices in dollars based on an exchange rate of 2850 pesos per dollar. If you show up in Colombia with dollars, you’ll not get such a good exchange rate, but by using my ATM card to take money out I actually got a rate of about 3000 per dollar. So 2850 splits the difference and gives a fair estimation of what I paid in dollars.

GETTING AROUND BOGOTA:
Like all of Colombia, taxis are cheap and plentiful. I never had a problem finding one, nor did I ever feel threatened inside of one. Others tell me that taxis can be dangerous though, and it has been recommended that you call and arrange a pickup. Taxi phone number are usually numbers like 366-6666, or something similar with one prefix digit and a remaining string of same digits. This is the kind of stuff to ask your doorman, or just observe from taxis around the city.

While in Bogotá, I discovered something else that I really liked. Their public transportation system is called the Transmilenio, and was actually quite good. It ran all the way up and down a major road called Autopista, which is Spanish for highway. If you like spending time wandering around and doing your own self-discovery, the Transmilenio was good and there were usually very good-looking women riding around too. For more information on that, check out this English language web site at http://pages.infinit.net/colombia/bogota/trans/transmil.htm. I don’t want to babble too much about public transportation, but for more information leave your questions in my inbox and I’ll be happy to respond.

SAFETY:
I felt very comfortable in Bogotá. Of all the Latin American cities that I’ve visited, it was the most cosmopolitan (although I hear that Sao Paolo, Buenos Aires and Santiago are equally so). I do speak good Spanish though, and have been to Cali enough times to have picked up on Colombian slang and style of dress, which help me to blend in. Again, having made pals with Javier was really helpful in keeping me out of the wrong places. All in all, I found Bogotá as safe as anywhere if precautions are taken. The general rule of thumb is to stay in the north side, and at night to stay pretty much north of Avenida 75 or so. This is completely acceptable and should not hamper your ability to hobby at night in Bogota.

THE HOBBY:
There are plenty of avenues for hobbying in Bogotá, many of which run 24/7. I tried a little bit of each and was never disappointed.

First there are the typical “take-out” nightclubs that are most discussed within the few existing discussions on Bogotá. The two that I remember most vividly are “Exstasis” and Cassanova.” In these establishments you’ll find a few skanks, a bunch of decent-looking women and a few knockouts too. They’ll ask for $35 but will go for less. You have to pay the fee to leave with the girl, which runs about $25 but can also be negotiated. I usually chose to bargain on the exit fee as opposed to the chica, and was able to get that down to $14, putting the total cost of your experience under $50. I did this a total of five different nights in Bogotá and had the girl fall asleep with me until the next morning each time. I generally found these girls to be professional, but not to the degree of, say, the Blue Marlin girls in Costa Rica. Most of those girls go home unsuccessful on the average night and are happy to hang out with you if you treat them well. One thing about those places though is that the drink prices are outrageous. One night in Exstasis I ordered a shot of aguardiente and was charged $12…get two or three drinks and your total cost for the evening goes way up. If you visit one of these places, don’t feel pressure to do things like order drinks for the girls. There are a lot more of them than of you and you can always get up and go find another girl if the first one becomes pushy. If you are going to buy drinks in these places, do not run a tab! Just pay as you go…they will offer to start a tab, but just tell them you want to pay now and they will oblige.

Next are what are called “Reservados.” These are places where you walk in, are seated down and the girls come and introduce themselves one-by-one. At the end, you choose the one you like, and she’ll come get you and take you back to a room. Prices range from $7 for 15 minutes to $30 for an hour, depending on the place. I did this more than twelve times and was happy each and every time. Each of these places had at least two attractive girls, all of whom were friendly and enthusiastic. Reservados are typically plain-looking houses that you wouldn’t otherwise notice when walking down the street, so you have to know where you’re going in order to find one. Many of them advertise in the daily newspaper (El Tiempo), where the advertisements say something like “Chicas Lindas” and then provide an address, maybe a phone number and nothing more. Taxi drivers all know bunches of them too, so if you are comfortable flagging down a taxi then ask your taxi driver as well.

I went at one point to a place called “Casablancas,” which is kind of a hybrid between a reservado and a nightclub. All the girls there are working, and just like in the nightclubs you can invite one of them to your table and buy a drink if you want. Also just like the nightclubs, they have an occasional strip show. In Casabalancas there was actually a small pool in the center of the floor that had a bridge over it, which is where the girls dance. Like a reservado, the action takes place on-premise and the prices were more similar. I mention Casablancas specifically as I found a girl there named Sandra who was an absolute knock-out. This girl (who was from Cali) really stood out even for Colombia standards, which are very high. The average woman in Colombia is pretty, and what would be an exceptional women in the states is much more common there. This girl Sandra was exceptional regardless of location, and really got into the sex too. She did BBBJ, lots of kissing, and even after the sex really liked kissing. This girl could make hundreds of $$$ in Costa Rica but was really happy with the $18 for a half hour and the $7 tip I gave her after.

Another way to procure talent in Bogotá is through the escort agencies. They also advertise in the newspaper and are available 24/7. The cost is about $60 for an hour and 15 minutes, which is expensive in Colombia. Another obvious disadvantage is that you don’t get to see or talk to the girl you get, but for research purposes I wanted to try this out and actually found a few good things about it. First, the woman who answered the phone was very helpful and asked me to describe the types of characteristics I liked. After listening to me, she told me that she could have someone there in 15 minutes, to which I agreed. Exactly 15 minutes later, an attractive girl who fit the description showed up. I paid her the money, she called her agency to check in (and start the clock running, I suppose), and then basically attacked me. It was great, and after Sandra she was the best time I had in Bogotá. At the end, she called her agency to report back, and they asked to speak with me. They asked me if the service was good and if I had any complaints. Of course I did not, but the agency seemed to be the most customer service oriented of all the chica procurement avenues I tried. This avenue is also great if it’s late at night and you want to get laid but don’t feel like going out to a nightclub.

Last there are the massage places. These places also advertise in the newspaper, and the ads look similar to those for the reservados. The difference is in the content of the advertisement. If the add says something to the effect of masajes starting at 20,000 pesos, a 15 minute masaje is all they are talking about. Of course you can get more for a longer time, usually for about $35 - $42, and some of those places have attractive girls too. If you like a good massage before sexo then this is a good daytime option as well. I tried two different massage places right in the zona rosa and had a great time in each.

All in all, it is easy and cheap to get laid in Bogotá.

ODDS AND ENDS:
Like I said, Bogotá is very cosmopolitan and there is a lot to do aside from the hobby. The Gold Museum in downtown is great, there are restaurants of all sorts, etc. One of the things I really liked was a neighborhood called “7 de Agosto.” It’s sort of a fashion district where I bought some shoes and some fútbol jerseys. The zona rosa was pretty cool, with two malls, a bunch of bars, stores, etc. It reminded me a lot of Coconut Grove in Miami, with a few exceptions. The major exception are the street touts who will offer to bring you to a place with chicas. If you already know where you are going, just politely decline. If you wish to hire one of these guys, I get the idea that it is safe but you’ll probably be targeted as a dumb tourist and quoted ridiculous prices for the drinks and for the girls. It’s better to walk around in the daytime and find these places on your own so that you know where you’re going at night.

CONCLUSION:
I had an awesome time in Bogotá and hope to find myself back there soon. Should you go? It depends…I wouldn’t go to Bogotá (or anywhere in Colombia actually) without a good command of Spanish. All of the communication I did, with Javier at the hotel, taxi drivers, the security guards on the Transmilenio, chicas, store clerks, and whoever else was done in Spanish and could not have been done in English. I imagine that standing out as a foreigner who does not speak Spanish makes you more of a potential target for crime, so while Bogotá seemed safe to me it may not to others. It also depends on what you like to do while not getting laid. I think I said something similar to this in a Cali trip report some time ago, but I’ll say it again. If you’re the type of guy who likes hanging out in bars with other gringos while smoking cigars and speaking English, then Colombia is not for you. Costa Rica (and maybe some other places, like Rio, that I’ve never been to) are great for that, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with it if that’s your thing. Bogotá is great if you like to discover new cities and can blend in well while doing so. That’s more what I like to do anyway, so for me Bogotá was perfect.

If you have any more questions, feel free to write to me in my inbox or at lamuerte63073@hotmail.com. I am sorry that this report is so overdue, and I will try to do a better job of checking in over the next week.

LM

LM is "vivo" again!

I would like to chase the Paisas of MDE, in October? What do you know of MDE:-)? Thanks

LM
Good report. I'm going to Bogota next year and I think I will try out the Suites Real 85. Thanks for the information.

SF,

I've never been to Medellín, but there sure are some great looking Paisas out there. Medellín is worth the trip I'm sure...keep me posted on when you'll be there and maybe I can join!

Boot,

Good call on the Suites Real 85. The location is great and it has everything you'll need.

LM

LM, I'm trying to plan a quick three or four night trip to MDE sometime in October?

Hope you can make it:-))))))) sf4dfish