The only difference in travel this time is that, with the US back on standard time and Brasil on summer time, instead of a one-hour time difference from EST to Rio time, it's 3 hours. You lose two hours on getting in, arriving at 1:30 instead of 11:30, but you leave a couple of hours later, 8:30 instead of 6:30, which gets you two extra terma hours on your last day.

Another change was this time, I took full advantage of the 2-hour layover in Sao Paulo. United has a nice club there and has the United Arrivals area, which is basically 2 or 3 large bathrooms with shower, nice shaving kits, heated towels, the works. So after the 9 hour flight down from Dulles, a nice breakfast in the club and a shower and shave and change of clothes meant that I could hit the ground running once I hit GIG, which is exactly what I did. We landed around 1:00 P.M. and I was checking into the Marriott around 45 minutes later, and 15 minutes after that I was at Alcazar with the guys.

After lunch, I cruised up to Blockbuster and was standing with SweetMesquite and Laredo outside Luomo, waiting for them to open. They opened 10 minutes late this day, not sure why but all I know is I was the 4th guy in the door and still didn't get to snag Bia before someone took her back. No loss, I did a round through the place, doing the double kiss greeting to the garotas I knew from last time. I was feeling more than a little horny so I wasted little time and did a nice session with Bon Bon or some such shit, one of the black girls. Good session in all, two pops and I'm back in the boite. Aldaron had arrived but was not really in the game, with his wife and all keeping a close eye on him. Don came in with a crew of first timers, a bunch of doctors from San Francisco or something along those lines. I always like seeing newbie mongers on their first outing, I imagine it's not unlike being Jane Goodall watching the gorillas in the mist and shit. You want to just go over and show them what to do but you don't want to upset the evolution learning system. All I have to say, to all you newbies out there is, when you go to a terma, remember, you're there to fuck the girls, not get drunk in the bar and pass out. You can do that in the states.

My second session was with my future wife Nicole, who I will discuss in a later chapter. She's real quiet in the bar, not aggressive at all but in the cabine, she is something else. Nice natural 34Cs and the softest lips in Rio. I had to negotiate with her to get my bottle of KY Warming Liquid back but hey, that's what you do in Rio!

After Luomo I headed back to the Marriott and had four messages on voicemail from my favorite from July. I called her up and she came on over. We had dinner at La Maison, the place right outside the hotel, and then we hopped a cab to her friend's apartment to pick up a few things - which ended up being a huge suitcase of stuff. I was thinking she could leave a toothbrush and maybe a bikini or two in the room, but she had other ideas and without really trying I had an instant wife staying with me. We head back to the hotel and to be honest, after the flight and 4.5 hours in Luomo (with 4 pops) and a big dinner, I was really tired and just wanted to get some sleep. But hey, I hadn't seen the fav in 4 months and had to attend to her sexual desires. Now, not being to specific, the cannon was raised and put into position, but powder and shot were nowhere to be found. I must have pumped her for 30 minutes and got blown for 15 but I could not get a nut. For the first time in my life I was really considering faking an orgasm but just as I got to that point the powder was finally lit and I was happy as hell. She, on the other hand, was not happy with the events of the evening. I told her I was just tired from the flight but she's not stupid and figured that if I had been on the ground for 8 hours before she saw me, I must have spent the day in a terma fucking my brains out. Word to the wise - the cariocas are more territorial than any other girls I've run into, and that includes the PI, Mexico, Thailand, etc. We settled into bed for a nice sleep but I knew that I was going to hear about this again, and again, and again…..

Cannon? You actually refer to your unit as a 'cannon'?? I mean, honestly, what type of sick degenerate would do such a thing?

Seek professional help, before it's too late. You have all the markings of a sex-tourist/addict Mr. Catacony.

Playboy, you have good eyes to catch the "Cannon" reference. It is really sad to see a grown man using pet names for his unit. It was an especially disappointing reference for me because with all the discussion of garotas, my Zeppelin was just starting to rise when he brought it up.

"Word to the wise - the cariocas are more territorial than any other girls I've run into, and that includes the PI, Mexico, Thailand, etc." --CC

Word to the wiser: never have a wife staying with you in your hotel. It is almost the same as bringing your real wife with you. It is like bringing sand to the beach.

Yes, I forgot that "cannon" was a copyrighted description from one of the sick fucks on this board. I couldn't think of a better term though for what I'll call Terma Dick - similar to whiskey dick where you can get it up with no problem, but getting it down can take a while. Most normal mongers in Rio experience it at least a couple of days while they're there, which is probably why garotas always call us safados.

Riorules, my plan was termas by day and serial honeymoon at night. The problem that occured was that my fav lives way the hell over in Barra de Tijuca, so as an experiment I decided to go with it and see how having a live-in garota would work for a few days. Stay tuned for the results.

By the way, at the same time in the same hotel, two other esteemed mongers who will remain nameless also were shacked up with their favs. It was a veritable den of domestic tranquility down there, for a few days at least

Cat:

Sounds like you had fun, as usual.


As for live-in "wives", you guys really have to learn how to say "If you don't like it, get the f- out" in Portuguese (Se nao gosta, cai fora). Favorita or no, there's always another garota in Rio.

BS

Badseed,

Thanks for Portuguese lession. I've been looking for that exact one.

(Message edited by off2golf on December 29, 2003)

Another good use of that phrase is "cai fora, piranha" which is especially useful while while having dinner at Terrazo Atl.

Badseed and Catocony,

Since Portuguese is rarely pronounced like it's spelled. Can you give us a little phonetic help with "Se nao gosta, cai fora"

Thanks,
Sterling

See below for best guess, Am I correct?

Se = See
nao = now (approximate sound, nasalized)
gosta = gaws-ta
cai = rhymes with pie
fora = faw-ra

I assume cai=fuck

Before using the above phrase, you may try
Voce vai embora ( Go away )
Voce vai embora, por favor ( Go away, please )

or

Eu quero otras garotas ( I want other girls )

or

Eu gosto de homem, nao garotas ( I like men, not girls ) - Did not use this one yet!



(Message edited by howard69stern on December 29, 2003)

CAT..show us a picture of the wife so we can all share in the Glory!! She has got to be damn fine to let her move in!

No pics of the ex-fav as we still communicate regularly. Read about her stay in the next couple of chapters and all will be explained. She's trying to work her way back into my good graces though, but she was a real pain in the ass by day 3.

My first chance to experience one of Luomo's monthly anniversary parties and I'll be God Damn if she doesn't start back to work there the day before it.

You didn't tell me your wife pulled out a couple of Samsonites when you went to her apartment. What the hell were you thinking letting a girl move in like .... (nevermind)

Oh yes... the poor newbie at Luomo. Nice guy, but he needed to relax. I remember Don was trying to get him to go with Bia for his first time, but we were discouraging that because it would have set the bar to high for every girl afterwards. We tried to get him to "ease into it" and do either Marina or Sheyla first... both quality choices, but not animalistic. I won't even say what happened to the poor guy.

"Cai fora pirahna" is slang for "get lost pirahna." It's a running joke now with mine. I got pissed and sent an email back in Oct. She never wrote back, but instead brought it up during my second Oct trip. She wasn't really mad... just amused, seemingly perplexed by how I would know to say that. It was all Badseed's fault.

I still have dreams of that Mariott bed.

"...but she was a real pain in the ass by day 3." --CC

LESSON NUMBER 3: never have a wifey staying with you in your hotel room. It is almost the same as bringing your real wife with you.

I know how tempting it is to have gatinhas stay with us in our hotels or apartments, and prove to ourselves that they somehow must really like us, etc.; but, soon enough, we find out the hard way that they too expect some sort of commitment from us.

I disagree on the multinight stays. It's a personal preference but for me, I tend to remain fairly detached (she called me "stone ice", I had no idea what she meant until I figured out she meant iceburg. I guess the burg parts translate into piedras (stone) in Portuguise instead of town. Oh well.) with the girls when the time comes to part ways.

I figure, if you're having fun and the sex is good, that's the big thing. I've had fun, not just in Rio but all over, both with body count days (2-4 different girls) to monogomous weekends. The danger of the serial honeymoon is of course you get roped in emotionally. So, if you can control that aspect, I see no harm in doing the serial method. Particularly, like Aldaron states, if you're in a sweet place like the Marriott where you can order in room service and live large for a couple of days. In its own way it can be better than dealing with the scene on Atlantica. Actually, Aldaron and I had the best of both worlds - we safado's actually left the girls in the rooms at night and ventured down to TA to hang with the guys.

I am sure this is not your (now) ex-wife case, but most gatas in Rio are from other states and are living in apartments with 6, 8 or even 10 other girls. So they really appreciate being invited to stay over long term. In this sense, you are actually doing them a favor staying with you over night or for the weekend. Enjoy the experience.

....yeeesh, I'm afraid that now there's going to be a band of mongers running around Rio yelling "Cai Fora!" at everyone... it means the same thing as "piss off" in English, although literally it's "fall out" (cai is the imperative form of cair - fall, and fora is out). Howard69's pronunciation is pretty much correct, although for what it's worth I made a slight grammar mistake, it should be "se nao gostar...", now I'm starting to sound like Xenono. ;-) But as long as I'm being painfully pendantic, Iceberg=IceRock in English too, "berg" is from the german (so is Burgh, the orignal of "burg"). No word for it in portuguese (no 'berg's in Brazil. except for Catocony!), it's just an "ice-bergey", of course.

And I'm glad I could contribute to Aldaron's wedded bliss!


BS

Guys:

More seriously (at least less bullshit pendantic), have any of you guys ever tried taking your "favoritas" along for pussy-hunting, at least to TA and Help? Even if your girl isn't bi-sexual, she's at least "participating" in the "hiring process". Anyway, they know that you are going to fuck other pussy eventually, and you know that they are going to go straight back to selling their own, and they've all done duplas (even if they haven't been "active", so to speak), so it's no great leap of cognition to bring them along to get some extra T&A. As long as they're not losing out financially, they don't care. Once you have your garota indoctrinated in the fact that you are still going to get some strange, you can probably still go have your one-on-one fun at the Termas while she is shoppping or working or whatever.

I'll admit I've never tried this myself with a GP, but I've done it a few times with different "semi-pros". What I mean by this is a girl who isn't staying with me for a previously agreed-upon price, but who gets paid later in gifts, bit of cash "to help the family," etc, which is pretty much the same as most of your "GFE" hookups. Two girls I've done this with had a blast, and the other one "went along for the ride", was all sullen in bed, and had to be subsequently kicked out of my hotel room. Oh well, .667 batting average. Anyway, with brass balls, a bit of cash waving around, and a shit-eating grin, anything is possible in Rio.

Enjoy!

BS

I've only progressed to leaving a girl in my hotel room sleeping alone while I go out foraging for pussy.

Badseed,

As long as your favorita has it in her mind that she is #1 with you, let her do the selection, keep her #1, and go have fun. I've got two girls in Sao Paulo who I have done this with, and it is great.

Just make sure the your favorita perceives herself to be your number one girl.

Enjoy the life,

Moondog

Have you guys gone mad? Inviting your #1 girl to help you pick out another girl for a dupla? Sordid, sordid, sordid.

I think I'm going to have to start surfing the 'cleaner' boards from now on.

Playboy:

I only invite them after we've been to Sunday morning church. Keeps them pure (in thought).

BS

Badseed,

If Club Hombre had an award for "line of the month", the following would get my vote.

"with brass balls, a bit of cash waving around, and a shit-eating grin, anything is possible in Rio."

This had me ROFL.

Sterling

I like the idea of strange during the day, and familiar at night. It's cheaper and you get to keep your stuff in your room.

Badseed and Moondog are correct...they all have done it so allowing them to be in on the process the duplas are way better this way...however I dont allow them to completely choose the 2nd girl because they will usually pick inferior or a friend...I choose and they do the talking...

Layne: Well of course YOU'RE the one doing the chhosing, you just let your #1girl be involved in the process. Otherwise,as you pointed out,she'll get a dog,no competition.

Sterling: Amazing the bullshit I write after I've had a few cups of coffee in me...

Enjoy the Life!

BS

Sure it was just coffee?

Badseed,

Let me buy you a beer or six. If you're that good on coffee, I've gotta see what you do on some real lip lubricators.

Sterling

Lip Lubrication and Sterling

I will be 24 hours and 12 beers eradicating THAT visual from my mind

Playboy,

Sorry to leave a skid mark on your virgin mind. I forgot you were a "newbie". I'll be gentle from now on.

Do you know what they call "duplas" in the PI? This one is for Murasaki's dictionary of terms: they call it "sandwich". The two girls are the bun(s), and you're the hotdog.

Sterlin:

My mind may not be as "virgin" as Playboy's, but the rest of me is... no lip lubrication, thank you very much! Go "be gentle" with Playboy...

Thanks for the virtual beers, though ;-)

BS