Day One – Getting a feel
The bellboy led me over to the 3rd tower. We were waiting for the elevator. When it came down, the doors opened and out came a very pretty girl. Seeing that I knew no Thai, I was trying to get the bellboy to ask her if she would like to come up to my room. Well, I guess it got lost in translation and off she walked away. Wasn’t sure if she was a working girl but she was alone. In hindsight I guess I should have tried to communicate that myself. But in any case I’m thinking if all the thai women look like this, it’ll be great!

Got up to my room and asked the bellboy how to get to Nana Plaza and Soi Cowboy. I knew they were fairly close but not exactly sure. By the time I dropped everything off and got out the door, it was like 145am. Great… only 15” before the bars close. Followed the bellboy’s instructions to Nana, go back down Soi 11 to Sukhumvit, turn right, then at the first signal, turn left and you’ll see it up there. No problem finding it, problem was all the bars were closing. So for investigative purposes, I followed his directions to get to Soi Cowboy. Went back the other way on Sukhumvit. Went to the first signal the other direction but couldn’t find it. Walked around a bit, still couldn’t find it. Getting tired of walking aimlessly so I just head back to the hotel… I’ll find it another time.

Too excited or something but couldn’t sleep and just hopped out of bed about 8am and had the breakfast buffet at the hotel. It was pretty good with a mix of Thai, Indian, and American food. They offered a lot of fruits and veggies too. All for less than 200B.

So then went walking around. A tuk-tuk got my attention and told me he’d show me the city for 10B. I knew he’d probably take me to a bunch of places I might not want to go but I figured for 10B, I could get a little tour of the city, this was my first time here.

His 1st stop, a tailor, Sammy’s Fashion. Been looking for custom shirts. The guy sold me on a couple but when I got them, the quality was pretty poor, especially having paid 1000B/each for them. Next stop, a soapie, Happy House. Small place, maybe about 10 girls, all ugh. He took me to a jewelry store, a silk store, a food court, the Lucky Buddha. Got some souvenir buying out of the way early and got to see a lot of the city even with these detours. He was telling me that he gets one coupon to buy gas if I stay at least 5” and gets more if I buy things. So I would purposely stay 5” just so he could get a gas coupon or buy souvenirs for more extras. He was like indebted to me. He told me he’d keep driving me around for free.

I just had him take me back to the hotel cause I wanted to work out. Get those kinks out from that flight. I told him I wanted to go to Chao Praya 2, so he said he’d come back in a couple hours and take me for free. The gym at the Grand President, 2nd tower, was decent -- had treadmills, stairclimbers, weight machines, and free weights. Not to mention it had American ESPN which I didn’t seem to get in my room.

Had lunch at the restaurant in the 1st tower, La Brasserie. Had some thai dishes recommended to me and very delicious! The help was friendly, helpful, and not bad looking either.

The tuk-tuk came by on-time. Off to a Chao Praya 2… or so I thought. He took me to Chao Praya 1 aka Jay-one. I told him I wanted to go to CP2 and pointed to where it was but he was acting ignorant. I guess he got a better kickback from CP1. Well, I was going to go to both anyway, so I went ahead and went in. I thought at least he’d wait around for me but he left. Just when I thought I might have a personal taxi, oh well.

CP1 had about 30 girls in the fishbowl. Saw a couple that looked decent but not spectacular. One was Kip about 5’1”, 105# and the other was Go about 5’, 115#. Both were natural down there. Kip filled up the bathtub, and Go undressed me. Then escorted me to the tub where Kip got in with me and washed me. After washing, they put me on one of those air mattresses. Using a lot of soap, Go who was like a C-cup slid up and down on me both backside and frontside. After rinsing down, we went to the bed. They both did CBJ and CG only. No other positions, no DFK, they just like to suck on your n*pples. This 3-some was 4000B/each + CP1 charges a 5% fee if you use a credit card.

Followed the Hombre directions to CP2. Turned right from CP1, crossed over the pedestrian bridge, walked about another ¼ mile and there on the left was CP2. They had about 20 girls but ugh, charging 1850B.

Since the tuk-tuk left me, I thought I’d use the Skytrain. Made my way back to CP1 and continued walking for about another ½ mile to the signal. The stairway to the Phaya Thai train station (on the Sukhumvit Line) is right at that corner. That is Exit 4. You’ll want to remember that for future visits. Went to the booth and bought a 3-day pass for 280B, unlimited use. This is great!

Took a little nap then off to check out the Eden Club. Run by the Frenchman and the story at this place is you pick one girl and she picks another. So a 3-some is mandatory. Selection was pretty sad. The Frenchman told me to come early, a half-hour before they open(1pm) to check things out. So I put that on my agenda and go to Soi Cowboy.

I couldn’t find it last nite but I found it now. At that one street with the signal, Asoke Rd/Soi 21, there’s like a canopy sign that says ‘Country Road’ or something like that on the NE corner, well actually its just north of the corner. Just walk under it and there is Soi Cowboy. It kinda looks like downtown Vegas – one open block of bars instead of casinos. There must be like about 30-40 bars. I didn’t go into all of them but went into the ones recommended here… LongGun, 5Star, Afterskool, Dollhouse, Midnight, Tilac, Baccara. Nothing, well, there was a maybe. At the bar Baccara they do have that glass 2nd floor stage but the girls wore panties They’re just a bunch of little bars, typically an elevated stage in the middle with girls in bikinis, barstools and tables surrounding and a bar on the perimeter.

Of the 4 main mongering areas, been to Nana, SoiCowboy, now off to the Painters Bars. Went to Dali, Monet, Bacchus, Wall St. Didn’t see anything until I got to Monet. These bars looked more like a typical American bar and all the girls except the mamasan were behind the bar. If you buy a girl a drink, she will come on your side. On the other side of the bar at Monet, one girl is at a profile to me. I look down and say, d*mn, this girl got some roundbootie. The typical thai girl has got a flat butt. I buy her a drink and she comes around. Her name is Tit, about 5’, 105#. She gave me a nice lapper and little kisses on the lip. I finally ask her if she’d like to come back to my hotel but she tells me she has ‘men’. What? She says she is having her period now. I was initially thinking, d*mn, why didn’t she tell me that to begin with but later thought it was nice of her to tell me that at the bar rather than barfining her and going back to my room and her telling me that.

Okay, at least I wish she would have told me sooner but still had time to go back to Nana before 2am. Nana is like at the SE corner of Sukhumvit and Soi 3…well actually just south of that corner, about 100 feet you’ll see this opening to a horseshoe-shaped mini-mall with 3 floors. There are probably at least 6 bars on each floor. So same thing, I check out all the recommended bars – Hollywood Strip, G-Spot, Rainbow3, Rainbow2, Hollywood Rocks. I only saw like 3 possibles in all these bars. Well of those 3 possibles I go back to the bar with the most attractive, Rainbow3. Sit down and get a drink. Well that one isn’t there anymore but I see another. But she just ignores me, then the one I liked comes on stage. One of the mamasans brings another girl to me but I point onstage and ask for that one.

Her name is Ma, about 4’10”, 90#, natural down there. Paid a 600B barfine then went off to a short time hotel just above Rainbow3. Room was 300B. Agreed to 1500B plus 500B tip if service was good. Showered together but gave no BJ, allowed no fingering, no kissing, just straight mish and doggie. I told her I was hungry so she took me to a food stand, they’re all over, but went to the one just at the street before entering Nana. Got some satays and watermelon – they were like 10B each.

CP2 is one of a few MPs that doesnt pay comission so cabbie/tuk tuk doesnt like to take you there.

These prices seem a little high to me. 4000B at CP1 for a threesome - that is 105 dollars.

Most massage girls give CBJ and NO DFK. BBBJs are more for Beer Bar girls, freelancers and most go-go girls.

Avoid Tuk-Tuks as you will always have problems.

The best thing that happened to you that day was the Tuk Tuk driver left you. You thought he was a nice guy doing you a favor but he was fleecing you from the start. They purposely take you to shops that have inferior clothes , jewlery, or whatever. These places cannot get customers legitimately so they rely on the shyster cab and tuk tuk drivers to haul in the sheep.You were ripped off by huge commissions at every place you stopped. He gets a lot more than a gas coupon and you pay for it.
Rules 1,2,3,4,and 5 NEVER listen to the advice of a taxi or tuk tuk driver in LOS !!

Merlin -- I have never had a CBJ in a soapie that I can remember. These girls are trained to do BBBJs.

I must have had a score or more of soapies and everyone has been BBBJ and 4000 baht each, is more that twice the going rate.

1,500+fine+500 tip +room is way overpriced too. Late at Nana you should get short time for 1000+fine or wait till 2pm and meet them outside. Still we all make mistakes at first. I look forward to reading the rest of the report.

I gotta learn to stop pestering the girls for photos, mabey that's why I'm not getting enough BBBJs at the massages.

Maybe I'm just too old and too lazy but if you guys don't use tuk-tuks or taxis, how to you get to some of these places? Some places are just too far to walk or too far from a Skytrain station... ie the soapies up along Ratchadapisek. I got to loathe both the tuk-tuks and the taxis but didn't know how else to get around. I even tried the tip about dropping me off at a nearby hotel like at the Prince Hotel, but the driver took me to Cupidy anyway. I even scolded the driver, walked over to the Prince Hotel, went to the bathroom and came back to Cupidy.

The general rule is never take a Tuk-Tuk anywhere (especially someplace THEY suggest because they get a commission on ANYTHING you buy and YOUR price goes up, or a "Tour" of the city) and never take a taxi to a massage parlor. Taxis are generally safe to take anyplace else, but do NOT accept any suggestions on where to go. Know where you are going and tell them where. In the individual threads here under Bangkok there are tips for avoiding paying the taxi commission at massage parlors.

For example, to get to Mona Lisa Massage, say you want to go to the nearby Siam Hotel. Walk in, wait for the taxi to leave and then walk over to Mona Lisa.

There are tons of other examples like that. You did it right with the Prince Hotel to Cupidy trick.

Some of the massage parlor threads also indicate which parlors pay the taxi tout and which don't. For example, CP2 is completely safe to take a taxi to. J-One, is not.

Roundbootie

I either walk, get a taxi or go by skytrain. A lot of people do not like walking in the heat and you obviously mastered the skytrain, so my only tip to you would be for the taxi and anyway these are so cheap.

Firstly be firm as soon as you get in. Always make sure the meter is on straight away, if it is a problem get out and hail another. Then research your destination so you sound confident where you are going, even write down the address, or print it out in Thai to give to the driver. The key is to look like you know the score, even if you do not. Next, never take a taxi from the obvious mafia areas like in front of the GP. Lastly as has been said above if the drivers offers to take you anywhere be firm and let him know what you want and do not be lead by him.

If you get any hassles just get out and get another taxi, in my experience nowadays 95% of all taxis are OK. One thing though, be firm, but not aggressive, there is a difference and being aggressive will get you nowhere.

Merlin wrote: "Avoid Tuk-Tuks as you will always have problems."

I quite enjoyed my tuk-tuk ride in Bangkok! Yes, it's probably the most dangerous way to travel...yet, I thought it was exciting and fun. Maybe because I ride Harleys, and have been riding dirt bikes every since I was in third grade?

But, no, I agree that you should never follow the advice of tuk tuk or taxi drivers. And there's that one tuk tuk that's always parked in front of NEP... very pushy bastard, when I was there. Certainly someone not to be trusted.

Wickedwilly: thanks for the tip on being firm but not aggressive. I know what you mean but don't know if I can act one way w/o being the other. Being lazy and old, I just took the taxi right out of GP, not walking out of 'harms' way and flagging down a moving taxi.

Guzybear: I agree that the tuk-tuk are fun to ride. Plus they weave in-and-out of traffic better than taxis. And the motorcycles taxis do even better but never took one of these in BKK just in Pattaya. I know its been posted you risk your life on a motorcycle taxi but don't you save time when there's heavy traffic?

RB
You are exactly right-- your mistake was taking the taxis parked at the Hotel. That's rule # 2. Those guys are vultures waiting for a score. Always flag down a moving taxi and tell him where you want to go. He may not know how to get where you want to go-- just say goodbye and flag the next. Believe it or not some of the honest taxi drivers do not know where all the soapies are. Some will still suggest another soapie with " younger prettier " girls . Just be firm and say NO !! Or " mai ow "" I don't want .

Guzy --- I ride a Harley too but am not about to get into a tuk- tuk in Bangkok at least not after midnight.. Not about the danger of the accidents. Some of those dudes are dirt poor and desperate and a farang late at night is easy prey. I have in the distant past had some pretty scary rides down some deserted side streets where thoughts of mugging or being led into a trap were impossible to avoid. Sobers you up really fast I'll tell you.
Maybe a little paranoid , but if you were there you would know what I mean.