Sorry about the delay. But I went for my maiden voyage Batam for the weekend. It was awesome and I now have a digital camera. I will write up a report on this Batam trip when I am done with this AC report/

A strange bed, a strange land, and a realization that I gotta whole lotta love to experience conspire to force a rather early wake up. Do the three S’s, exchange some SMS with Porker, and I am out the door for some adventure. As soon as I close the door to my room I encounter the ubiquitous hospitality of the staff on the Central Park Hotel. The women responsible for cleaning my room bolts down the hallway to introduce herself and ask if there is anything I need. “Why yes sugar, extra towels, lots of towels!” I say as I stuff some funny money into her hand. As I enter the hotel lobby, the cuties behind the reception desk wish me good morning by name. Then I turn to go into the little café cum bar and I get another set of personal greetings by name from some cuties. Dang, I have been here slightly more than twelve hours and everybody knows my name.

One thing quickly struck me about AC, and Fields Ave. in particular, is how damn optimized it is for serving the Western Mongering Male. All of the hotels’ customers facing positions (except security) are staffed by extremely friendly and cute young women. This is no shortage of places serving up western grub at reasonable prices. Also, the portions where overwhelming in size. Hey I am a fat man, but after living in Asia for almost a year, these entrée sizes are at least twice the normal size of restaurant meals in Asia. There is no need to elaborate on how western friendly and convienent the Go Go Bar scene is. Everybody you encounter speaks English. There are no squat toilets. And I didn’t see a single Korean/China man puking his guts on the sidewalks and no neon lit KTVs. I know it’s third world Asia here, but damn, everything felt Americanized and decidedly not exotic.

Porker escorts me around the block to Kokomo’s where I go native and have some pork adobo and coffee for breakfast. I was taken aback by the lack of fresh fruit and juices that are everywhere and cheap in SEA. Soon we are joined by a third Muskateer who I will refer to as DZG. While enjoying breakfast, we engage in the morning mongering ritual where every one recaps their previous evenings festivities. This is an enjoyable act of male bonding. I was quite impressed with the “show” some guys put into their “show” and tell sessions.

Over breakfast, DZG asks Porker about the Santos street scene. “Well dude it’s right out the exit here.” This leads to the first mongering activity of the day. We boldly walked the down the crumbling asphalt, avoided the aggressive advances of VCD porn pushers, and the calls of the trike drivers until we hit the Heaven’s Bar on the right side of the street. Oh the irony of this bar’s name. We marched up the entrance stairs into a little stuffy bar that reminded me of something I would have found in a bedroom of my seedy frat house. Mamasan slowly manages to stir one, then a second, and after much delay a third resident whore to entertain us. Now the street is known as blow row, but I didn’t see any bars with crawl spaces or other interior design attributes that I imagined one finds in a blow job bar. Nope, this was just a down and out sleazy little brothel. So we are paired off into three couples and I am playing grab ass with a simple looking gal in glasses and a tight top suggesting small but perky breast. Well I am here to have the experiences, so I decide to see if the quickie blow jobs are anything special.

You pay you 500 pesos and you take your chances. I go back to the short time room with my choice and it’s a small moldy hot closet sized bedroom. Obviously the girl lives here with at least two other girls and it’s just filthy. No showers or pre-wash; this feels like Mexico not the hygienic Asia I know and love. Well we manage to get our clothes off. She’s looking pretty average while I am looking way below average as I break out into a funky sweat. I opt for the blow job only and delicately recline onto the bed as I was afraid that I would cause a herd of cockroaches to appear and scurry off in all directions. OK, well let’s see what it is that makes blow row BJ’s so special. Well about twenty minutes later I had learned that there is absolutely nothing special. After all that consternation, I got a very average blow job from a very average girl in a horrific setting. The Monger X recommendation (which I did follow after this) there are some gems on Santos street but, at no additional cost, have your session in your hotel or a short time hotel.

After that scarring incident I walk out into the street in a daze. My eyes scan across to the infamous left side of Santos (home of scary Billy Boys) and I see an open air bar with a very angelic girl beckoning me over. I cross the threshold, enter the Luz Bar and into the arms of Lyka. In this place I will spend many happy hours and with Lyka I will some great times. This bar basically has a long open window with a small counter to sit at running it frontage – a great place to watch the Santos street world go by. The depth of the bar is quite shallow relative to its length with a small bar on one side and a videoke machine on the other. Immediately, I have a cold San Miguel in hand, a sweet beautiful girl in my lap wiping the perspiration from my brow, and my mood is quickly improving. Soon DZG is joining us and the party gets going. We have a little thing going where I say “open sesame” and then Lyka unbuttons and unzips her jeans, pulls each flap aside exposing her little cotton undies, and repeats “open sesame’ in an angelic little voice.

Next I ask if she wants sing some songs for us. I learned quickly that is the question every filippina wants to hear. Soon we are pumping fifty peso coin after fifty peso coin into the videoke machine. Lyka loves to sing and I enjoy having her serenade me with love song after love song. The Santos street version of the good humor guy comes by and I spend a buck buying ice cream for all takers. If you ever wanted to live the life of a whale but only have a tourist class budget get ye to olde Angeles quickly my friend. OK soon the girl wants me to sing a song so I break out Steve Miller’s “Abracadabra” to keep with the magic party theme. Hey I got all gals up and dancing and singing – I ‘m having a blast. My adoring public – Lyka – wants another. That’s when I pick the song that becomes the theme song for our Santos Street Love Story: Dust in the Wind. Yeah yeah I know you were spitting milk through your nose hearing that one. She doesn’t know the song but Lyka goes all goo goo eyes on me and I will end up singing that song many times.

We all know where this is going – or do we. DZG suggests that we take Lyka for a little short time action back at his room in the Orchid with some picture taking. I really like this one but I have not nearly had the necessary recharge time from my previous trip to Heaven. So we agree to take her back and just do a photo shoot. The three of us go back to DZG’s room and we get her naked and he starts snapping. Damm she got a great little body, especially the ass. I start fondling her all over, sucking her tits and posing her pussy. Soon she and I are making out. I think DZG now has the goods on me and I will never get to fullfil my dream to be president. Anyway he excuses us as he leaves and requests that we put a towel on top of the covers first. So I strip down and Lyka and I are exploring each other. DZG returns to the room while I am straddling her face and doing the reach around masturbation on her. DZG quickly retreats to his bathroom. I start to get my freak on, but I think I here the sounds of somebody baking brownies and have a suspicion (later confirmed) that peering eyes were watching through the ventilation slots on the bathroom door. This coupled with lack of recharge time lead to a –uh uhm – diminishing performance. In response, I lay on my back and Lyka crawls between my legs to show me how a real BJ specialist does it. DZG emerges and takes some photos of the activities from the sofa at the foot of the bed. Unfortunately, after about ten minutes it was pretty clear the “magic” wasn’t going to happen. Anyways Lyka was a total sweety. We tipped her 200 or 300 pesos on top of the barfine. I vowed to return tomorrow in more virile state.

Moving along, there was some dinner. I think Steak night at the Orchid. My porterhouse was tough and flavorless. After a little nap, it was time for some bar hopping on Fields. Once again accept my apologizies, because I can’t remember much accept that I started at the main gate side and I wanted to work my way towards the Blue Nile End where I hear the hottest girls reside. Well I met up with Porker at some point and I was marching towards Blue Nile until we walker past Bananita’s and the door swung open. In this opening I caught a glance of the most incredible lean body with beautiful full b-cups covered only by one piece thingie apparently made out of dental floss. Detour. Well Porker and I brought the customer count up to three. Never the less it seemed like the party was starting just fine. I soon had the vision in white on one side and a friend on the other. However, it seemed the air was let out of the balloon quickly. I was enthralled with the looks of these two girls, but their energy stank. I also learned later that they were saying not so flattering things about me in tag a log. OK there was one still quite spunky, very cute one on stage being very playful. So I had her come down for a drink. She sat between my legs and she remained playful. Porker indicated it was time to move on. I was exhausted and decided my bar hop was going to end here. Here come the rookie mistakes. I ask about barfines and the two hotties at my sides indicate Mens. Bullshitting me or not, their shitty attitudes weren’t worth the burining of their trophy bodies in my mind. So I go to the cute one between my leggs. “Me cherry girl.” Folks at home please always do the Epi enquiry before you by any drinks.

I actually like the cherry girl, and she quickly tries to sell me on taking her. Although she was cherry she liked to have her pussy eaten and she did blow jobs. This was probably a case of a snow job not a blow job. At the time it sounded like it could be a lot of fun; and it was. So me and my cherry bar fine retired to my deluxe room at the central park hotel. The cherry girl did shower with me and was super affectionate. After some cuddling, my lips worked down her body until I came to the tiniest precious little twat. I have never seen a cherry pussy before, and I still probably hadn’t, but I did enjoy the little fantasy. After a good twenty minutes I had the little cherry girl bucking up a storm. After some more cuddles and kisses, cherry girls lips worked there way down my body until she came upon the tiniest but not so precious wiener. Anyway her blow job was pretty good and not so innocent. After a while she needed to go to the bathroom and spit something out. After brushing her teeth, cherry girl gets under the covers and snuggles right up next to me. However, my head started to hurt because I stopped drinking beers. Next I gave cherry girl quite the surprise. “Sweetie I just want a short time, you go now.” Her face displayed shock and rejection. Her response was to shake her head no and hug me tight. Nope I didn’t want this as I slept off my drink. “No. I am serious you go now.” Without a word but looking dejected cherry girl reluctantly got dressed and graciously took her trike fare and left.

I take three aspirin, a vitamin C, and guzzle two bottles of water. Day two is in the books. Perhaps my story so far is a little dark and full of some mistakes, but have no fear as I was having a great time at this point. Furthermore, my actual rate of intercourse does pick up a bit as does my ability to pick winners.

I have never seen 50 piso coins but maybe they were tokens or something. I like your writing style and your sense of humor. I just landed into the US after a 10 day visit and am already missing one particular sweetie.

Next time, if you want to find out if they are cherry, look at their tag/license hanging on the front of their uniform. If the number starts with a "V", then they are a certified virgin. The lettering before the number separates the hygiene dates for cherry girls as opposed to the others. Found this out on my last trip and sure enough, the girls were not bullshitting about this technique. I caught one girl lying, and she screamed at me, "How you know that" and I told her that her Filipino boyfriend told me the secret.

MongerX, reading your report was ALMOST as fun as being there for me, as your descriptions are absolutely friggin' PRICELESS. I don't know if everyone is laughing their ass off reading this report, and maybe you really DID have to be there, but I can't remember the last time I laughed this hard (probably when Epi was telling some of HIS morning after breakfast tales on MY cherry trip), and am sure it was NEVER reading a trip report. This is GREAT stuff, dude, and PLEASE keep it coming.

I am REALLY sorry I missed y'all's Santos fiesta that day, but caught the abbreviated version a couple days later and you guys really did do that place right. Describing that place with dogs, cats, little kids, baklas, hos, and horny dudes all mixing together is impossible with mere words, yet you did a fantastic job.

Re: our barhop on this night, I think it was the night we started at Cambodia and had some fun upstairs. I had a GREAT time that night, and YOU really put me in the mood by suggesting that if we were gonna kick back at Cambodia, we might as well kick it 'AC style' and just have girls around for the hell of it. Broke me out of my ultra-tightwad mode and let it really hit home that I was ON VACATION!

Blazers, they were 5 peso coins, that actually look very similar to Mexican 10 peso coins. Like MX says, it's all like funny money there anyway! Interesting stuff re: cherry ID's.

Oh yeah Porker is right they were 5 peso coins. At 50 pesos a song, singing would have been more expensive that Boom Boom. Can't have that!

Porker, your right this was the night we hit Cambodia. Shit I had it on the fourth night. Oh well let me offer a short synopsis here.

I was determined to actually hit all of the Blue Nile bars on this night. So I had the brillant idea that I start my bar hop at the McArthur end of Fields and just start with these bars. Unfortunately, I hit this places too damn early, and the meat wasn't in the display case yet. My limited impression was these places were huge, had the best facilities, and looked like top end US strip clubs. Also, the set up was such that girls danced kind of removed from the customers. In all honesty, I was not that comfortable here as it felt much more impersonal and business like than the other typical AC places. I think these Bars are better if you are in a barhop group of half of dozen people, rather than if you are lone ranger or with just one other guy.

Speaking of Lone Ranger, I was quite happy when Porker sms that he wanted to join me. So we met at the Shwarma place. Put something in the Bellies and Commenced barhopping.

By Far the best venue of the evening was Cambodia. The place has two levels which exenuates the narrow feeling of its length exceeding its width. It's cool to that they have a dancing stage on both levels. P and I start stage side level one where the are some definite lookers and some big hooters. All of the sudden I got big hooters on the brain and I must have them.

Porker struch first getting his game on with a very cute curvaceous Cherry girl. Things weren't going to according to plans as a small chested waitress nameed Cindy started to persistently work on me. She was massaging my shoulders, hugging me, and being quite charming. Although Like the feel of the velour of the cocktail waitresses uniform my impression was that her tits were small and she had a chipmunk face.

Suddenly I saw a big tittied, white porcelain skinned, chinese looking beauty dancing about four dancers down from my place at the stage. This girl looked like she should be in a top end Singapore Karaoke, not in some LBFM white boy go go bar. Well I get the eye contact thing going. Howeve, she is moving to go up the stairs to the second level. Porker agrees to buy his big tittied cherry girl some drinks and I motion to China girl I am going up and I want her to join us.

Unfortunately, after I get a seat upstairs I don't see my girl anywhere. Damn it Damn it Damn it, I must go Sotong Sotong on those titties. Of course to make matters worse, clingy troll waitress has followed me up here. At least she feigns looking for the girl. Oh well, I break down and by the waitress a Lady Drink while I await the emergence of the China Doll.

All of sudden the mileage goes into overdrive. This waitress is giving me a great massage. Then all of the sudden her hands are up my shorts. Damn it she is making me fucking hard as a rock, She is whispering how she will give me a massage and everything else I desire. Stop it you troll waitress, I need big booobs enveloped in smooth silky skin white as snow.

For the next half hour or so this continued. The waitress I was trying to scorn just kept he hard and horny the whole time. In the sofa next to me Porker appeared to be getting great mileage from his cherry girl. Soon the rounds of boy shots are started. However, china girl never arrived and we moved on.

You know how I said I was unlucky. Well that's wrong I was lucky and stupid as hell. I should have picked Cindy. Porker got her number and did an afternoon short time with her. At his show and tell I crying, as Cindy delivered all the goods I want including great massage, BJ, and ass rimming. Somtimes you shouldn't get your mind so set on what you want, as fate will unexpectedly deliver you treasures if you go with the flow. I learned my lesson. Oh yeah, Cambodia bar Rocks!

Here are some pictures of Lyka:
Photos: Lyka 05 06

Here are some Billy Boys enjoying their ice cream. A Postcard From Santos Street