Since I'll hardly be breaking any new ground, I'll forgo my usual reporting style and do an on-the-ground report with the President Solitaire as my headquarters.

So I got on the plane 20 minutes before the 2:15pm departure time. This is my fifth trip to Thailand, but my first trip on NorthWest. I got an incredible deal by buying an "Upgrade any Transpacific Fare" on Ebay for $320. I then bought a round-trip JFK-NRT-BKK-NRT-JFK for $800 and was able to get a seat assignment in Business Class almost 3 months in advance. With my Platinum Status on OnePass, I'm earning 48,000 miles this trip and not burning any. It's a really good deal and one worth looking into. Just do a search on Ebay in "Other Travel" for "Upgrades" and see what comes up. Be careful - I understand that the United upgrades are very hard to use, especially if you don't have status with that airline. They probably won't upgrade you until you're at the gate - only if seats are available. That's why the NW deal is so attractive.

I settled into seat 73A. After reading through many threads on the subject in flyertalk.com, I chose seat 73A located upstairs right behind the flight deck. There are no seats in front of you, so you have a good 10 feet of leg-room. I don't usually opt for the aisle since I tend to get up evevry hour or so and don't like climbing over people, but with this much room in front, you can walk around your seatmate even if he is in the flatbed option. There are also side lockers for easy access to your stored bags (I didn't check in anything) and four windows for your viewing pleasure.

The dreaded "we have a mechanical issue" announcement was made right before takeoff and long story short, we took off 2 hours late. That's not how you want to start a 13 hour journey. Once we were in the air I began to relax. NW has 16 747-400s and have retro-fitted 10 of the 16 with their new World BusinessClass (The remaining six are to be done by the end of the year). The odds were in my favor and my plane had the new WBC. Biggest difference: 110 outlets at every flat-bed (well 176deg) seat and on demand entertainment. I was counting on being able to plug in and set up my laptop with DVD player. It's got a nice 15.4 widescreen - great for movie watching.

While I was watching Lost in Translation, the meal service began and I placed my laptop on the side lockers and switched to the plane's IFE, watching the Last Samurai. The new screens are pretty clear and of a nice size. The food may have been the best airline food I every had - perfectly roasted boneless chicken with great vegeatables - incredibly tasty. Wine was free-poured throughout and after a couple of after dinner drinks I was feeling great.

Finished watching Lost in Translation just as they turned of the lights - still had another 8 hours to Tokyo. Stay up and watch movies or get some sleep? I popped 20mg of Ambien, watched one episode of the Shield and then converted my seat into a bed. The next thing I remember, breakfast was being served in the cabin and we were one hour away from Tokyo! Perfect.

We made up a little of the lost time but instead of 2.5 hour layover, I had 30 minutes. I didn't get to check out the famous public showers, but I did hit the loudly-touted newly redisgned NorthWest Lounge and wasn't all that impressed. No free wireless ($5 for the day) and one free station that wouldn't let me log on to clubhombre. Also noticed that my Tri-mode Blackberry (through T-mobile) never had reception - and I verified twice before leaving that I had international permissions. We'll see what happens in Bangkok - the great CSR I spoke with at T-mobile not only got me the unlock codes within 12 hours, but also had me write down instructions on how to call customer care from Bangkok. It's not as simple as dialing 611.

Used the bathroom to freshen up and it was time to board the plane.

Thankfully the second leg took off on time and actuallt landed 30 minutes early at 11:30pm. Again I was in a newly outfitted WBC, so I watched DVDs right up to landing. Really made the time go by fast. The flight crew was just as accomodating as the first one.

I cleared immigration in five minutes and having no checked luggage I went into the arrival hall to meet Nueng. I kept looking at my tri-mode Blackberry, which should have been roaming by now, but it was stuck in search mode. I didn't see Nueng, so wasting no time, I hit a payphone and called her cell. She was waiting in the same spot in Terminal 1 as she was in January when we both waited for Sandman to arrive from Manila. I was in Terminal 2, so I just walked over and found her quickly. She looked great andwas with an Angel Witch co-worker, Nim. These Thai girls hate to be alone and 18-year-old Nim wasn't hard on eyes either.

We got into a metered taxi and 250 baht later we were checking into the President Solitaire.

While I took a shower, the girls unpacked my bag and neatly put away all my clothes. I felt great after the shower, got dressed and handed each girl a gift of cosmetics. Nueng gave me a very nice plant - not knowing I can't bring that back with me. The gesture was appreciated.

We all went out to eat, and went back to that great seafood restaurant in Chinatown. This time I remembered to take a card. It's called T & K Seafood at 49-51 Phadung Dao Road in the middle of Chinatown at the corner of Thong Suphan Yaowaraj. I have the card with everything in Thai and will scan it in when I return stateside. We got there at 1:30am and when we left at 3:00am the outdoor section was still going strong. The food was awesome. Plenty for three people plus drinks came to 1,200 baht.

We then headed back to the PS and I waited for the girls to take showers. Nim settled in on the living room couch and Nueng and I got reacquainted with each other in the bedroom. By 4:30am I was happy and spent and called it a night.

Sunday, May 16

Got up at 11:30am, took a shower and while the girls took their showers I tried again to get the wireless internet to work, with no success. And my phone still wasn't roaming.

After everyone was dressed, we decided to head over to MBK to have lunch and get me a local SIM card, my one from January having expired. The taxi over was quick and we had a decent lunch at Black Canyon - real cheap, like under 500 baht and they take AMEX.

We went over to a phone kiosk and I bought a Happy card like the last time. I had the unlock code and instructions and unlocked my Blackberry myself. Popped in the new SIM, closed up the phone and waited. After two minutes I was in business - with a perfect 5 bars of reception! Plus my address book is intact. Gotta love the Blackberry. I called Socrates69 and hung up after six rings, figuring he was indisposed.

Went back to the PS, went downstairs and got a cable for the internet and was in business right away. Never did figure out how to hook up wirelessly, but having a hardline is better.

Just got a call from Socrates69 and we're hooking up at AngelWitch at 8pm. Gotta pay Nueng's barfine and that's as good a place to start as any. Planning on having dinner and we'll see what happens from there.

Well, it's 3:20pm now. Nueng and Nim just left to get fresh clothes and I'm gonna put in an order for clothes at a tailor. Gonna take the tuk-tuk to Sukhumvit and afterwards probably get a Thai massage.

It's hot and humid, but man it's great to be back!

My local cell number is 09-481-2447 if anyone is around. First round is always on me.

For 800 bucks (150-250 bucks difference) I'd agree you got a good deal on the bidness class, trip, esp. with the FF miles. Otherwise, I don't care how many ways you slice it, 99% of the world is paying waaaaaaay too much for an upgrade over the standard airline CHAIR on a frickin' airplane. So you get to your seat 15 minutes before me and exit the plane 5 minutes faster. Ooh aaah.

Have fun in PARADISE!!!

WS

Allow me to state, once again, that I WISH I WAS THERE WITH YOU!! I spent 75 days in SEA and I'm going through the worst withdrawals of my life!! Hoping it wouldn't be so bad I get on the airplane and come back to America only to rediscover how fat and princess-like woman in this country are. I gotta take care of my business, make some money, then get back on an airplane and get back to heaven!!

Porker

Until you've flown an airline with decent business class, or EVA's Deluxe, don't underestimate the power a "chair" has. If I was required to fly a 13-14 hour leg in coach I do not think I could make the trip (back problems). EVA Deluxe makes it bearable and their business class makes the trip home actually pleasant.

E

Epi, I totally agree. When I moved out to Asia I was able to use American miles to upgrade to Biz class. It makes a huge difference on those 8+ hour flights. I have been spenidng my first year here establishing my status on United (I was an idiot and didn't know about status match policies.) I am crying every long haul flight I have taken in coach since.

Porker, all you need to think about is the misery of your middle economy seat on your China Airlines seats on your last trip to Asia.

WS, Congrats on being Plat and getting one fantastic deal for $800, I lost Plat designation this year b/c last year I tried hedging my bets with both Star Alliance and Onepass. There is a slight diffce between Plat and Gold. But I was able to score a Biz tx on Singapore Air using Mexicana miles, on their new nonstop from LA-Singapore. That'll be exciting to try out 18.5 hrs in the air. BTW, I was recently successful transferring 25K miles from CO-Amtrack-United. This strategy actually worked and United has tons more fligts to SEA through its Star Alliance partners.

Porker: many of the upgrade miles we get are "virtually" free, and using miles to upgrade is the most efficient use of these miles. WS got an excellent deal for $800 (which is what you'd pay for an economy seat anyway). I've got 200K miles in my Co account, but only 65K are actual miles flown last year. So all that other stuff are bonuses, credit card, and promotions.

IMO, it's imperative that people who fly to SEA sign up for any FF program. Once you become loyal to a program and get an elite level, your miles really rack up like crazy. CO gets a lot of flak for being miserly domestically, but I've never had a problem upgrading internationally. There are also tons of ways to make up those miles with everyday spending.

WS
I have never been able to use the wireless internet connection at PS. Even in the Penthouse suite the wireless only worked on rare occassion. Their wireless network is useless IMO. I always take a cable with me and just hook up on day one. As you said the wired connection is better anyway.
Nice to be met at the airport by someone you know you are going to have a fantastic time with --Chai mai ??
Look forward to your upcoming reports on the " higher end " areas.

Wallstreet,

As usual I look forward to reading about your exploits it will keep me going until I go to Cuba at the weekend.

KM,

I managed to get connected in the PS by wireless in a few places. In my room I sometimes had no signal in the study, but if I moved into the bedroom I would get a good enough signal. Ask where the local booster is situated. In my hotel in Malaysia I had 2mb access and downloaded emails and looked at CH while having breakfast. So do not give up on wireless just yet

Epi,

Sorry to see you stuck in Farang land. Hope you make some good money in the coming months I am hoping to have a bigger party than last time ,later in the year.

Porker,

The way I justify it, I take one week vacation at a time. Of that week 40 hours is on a plane. Actually, with the runway delay, I was on the pla\ne for 42 hours. Being in Biz class means my vacations starts when I get to the airport lounge and hit the open bar. I actually enjoyed the flight over - got to watch some movies I hadn't had time to see and got a great 7 hours of sleep. Getting that sleep meant instead of being exhausted open arrival and going to bed, I was able to shower and hit the town, gaining another night.

Or simply put, my fat ass won't fit in economy.

Epi - sorry I missed you too. Hooked up with Socrates69 last night and he had nothing but good things to say about you.

Merlin - You opened my eyes to the world of FF. I had no idea what I was doing until you took the time and guided me. On every trip, my first glass of champagne gets toasted to you.

KM - unfortunately, not only does there wireless not work, but their internet has been down most of the past day and a half. It just came back up at 7:00pm Monday, so hopefully I'll be able to update my report after dinner/bowling tonite. Had a great time at the Coliseum on Soi 55 last night and Neung and I got terrible food poisoning at dinner from Cabbages and Condoms. Go figure, never got sick from the street vendors and almost die from a well-known restaurant. Still hitting the town tonite - it's all out of my system.

I took the PS tuk-tuk over to Sukhumvit and got out at Soi 11. The gameplan was to buy some summer shirts and then get a traditional Thai massage. I walked over to Versaces on the corner of Sukhumvit and Soi 7/1. All I wanted was some short-sleeved silk shirts that could be worn outside the pants, a summer staple for me. We settle on a price of $275 for 10 shirts. I think I could have gotten him down to $250 but I wasn't in a real haggling mood. They had plenty of bolts of silk to choose from and in 5 minutes I had made my choices. The fitting was fast as I had another custom-made shirt on that fit well. I go back on Tuesday for the first fitting and they should be ready by Wednesday.

I then walked back to Soi 11 in search of a traditional Thai massage place. I found Sabai Sabai and walked in. A young lady grabbed my hand and had me sit down. They brought out a menu and I choose 2 hours for 500 baht. She then washed my feet, gave me slippers and led me upstairs. We entered a cubicle and I noticed that this place had more privacy than the usual Thai massage places. I wondered if any extra serves would be on offer? I changed into a set of pajamas and laid down. All I wanted to do was relax and the girl didn't seem interested in conversation, so it waws a perfect match. The massage was good - not the best I've gotten, but not the worst. About 45 minutes in, she asked if I would like "special" massage. I wasn't in the mode for a handjob and in my experience "extras" in places like these are exorbitant unless you do some real hard bargaining, so I politely declined. The regular massage continued and nothing was offered again.

Soon it was over and I got dressed, noticing the sessiuon ended 20 minutes early. Oh well, I'm not going to argue over 20 minutes. It was now pouring rain outside, but luck was with me and a tuk-tuk was dropping someone off next door. 5 minutes later I was in the PS.

I talked to Socrates69 and he was going to be busy with his lady until around 10, so he was going to call me then.

Nueng was right on time at 8:00pm and for some reason I felt the need to have dinner at Cabbages and Condoms. I had read in a few places that the food was good. We took a taxi to the restaurant and the place is huge. It has ouytdoor seating under a myriad of lights but we opted for the AC inside. Nueng did the ordering, me adding only the soft-shell crab special. The food was good (so we thought at the time) and the price was ok. As dinner winded down, Nueng suggested we go over to the Coliseum, on Sukhumvit and Soi 55. I was fine with that and she asked if she could invite one of her girlfriends, Da. No problem.

You can't possibly miss the Coliseum on Sukhumvit. Inside, it's a huge set-up with a stage and the type of musical review/comedy acts/dancing routine/lip-synching that the Thais love so much. No cover charge to get in and the place was half full. It was after all Sunday night.

We settled in at a table and ordered a bottle of Johnnie Walker Black. Whoever markets Johnnie Walker in Thailand is a genious. It's everywhere and everyone's gotta have it. And it's gotta be Black Label which cracks me up because they mix it with Coke AND club soda. Go figure. The bottle was 1,300 baht which I thought was very reasonable.

Da and a gay friend of Da and Nueng showed up right after we arrived. As Khun Mor has noted, the Thais love going out in groups (especially when there's a farang picking up the check!). And I gotta admit, I like an entourage.

Meanwhile Socrates69 called and I told him where we were. The drinks were flowing and a good time was being had by all. Socrates made it over and although the music was loud, we were able to talk a little. Total class guy is Socrates.

I was wondering how many bottles we were gonna go through, but we barely killed the one. The waiter, who stood next to our table the entire time, refreshing everyone's glass when it was half empty, was going easy on the JWB and heavy on the sodas. Man, if I was running that place it would be the other way around. Total bill, including a couple of snacks was just under 2,000 baht which I thought was very reasonable.

At 1am Soc headed out and we weren't far behind. Nueng, Da and I headed in a taxi to the PS. And then it started. My stomach was feeling a little off and as soon as I hit the bathroom I knew I was in trouble. Was it something I ate, or did I catch something? It came on strong and fast. Chills, fever, the runs. Then Nueng's face started turning gray. So it was the food.

I'll spare you the details, but a restless night was had by all. I popped some Cipro and Immodium AD but it wasn't doing much good.

I called Socrates at noon and begged off lunch plans, telling him I was stricken. I told him we'd try for dinner. Nueng went home for medication and I basically just lounged around and took naps and eventually the worst was over. I was feeling better by 7pm and took a shower as Nueng showed up. She was feeling better as well.

I called Socrates but only got a recording. My local SIM card was now not working in my Blackberry, but I'd have to sort that out later.

Nueng suggested going to an all you can eat sushi/shabu-shabu place in Silom. I asked her if she was crazy, but she insisted it was a great deal only 199 baht per person. Just what the doctor ordered - discounted sushi!

The place was busy and fun - everyone has a cooking pot in front of them and raw meat and sushi pass in front of you on a conveyor belt. I kept looking at the raw fish, wondering how long it was sitting out, but Nueng didn't hesitate and started chowing down. I followed suit and the food was good.

Hate to stop here but it's almost 8am and it's time for bed!

Ws
You messin around with my woman ??? LOL -- Lot's af Da's around but my Da does have a friend named Neung who I have never met-- both very popular nicks in LOS. It wasn't my Da was it??
Coliseum still one of my favorite clubs in BKK. The waiters in every club I have ever been in are very tight with the booze they pour. You can never empty your glass before they refill it but use little Black and mostly mix. Makes for a longer evening as most of the tables are there for the night- if they were heavy handed all their customers would be on the floor or driving the porcelan bus.
I tried SabaiSabai on Soi 11 once -- they are more like Baron's than most traditional massage places but no private room. Some good looking pooying there but mine wanted 2,000 baht for a BJ and 3,000 baht for FS. I laughed so hard the dude next door wanted to know what happened. She refused to bargain so we just finished up a half-assed oil massage and I gave her no tip. She was pissed but WTF- I am never goin back there again !!

KM

Not to worry, she wasn't your woman. But I gotta tell you, when Neung asked if she could invite her friend Da she said "very nice face and tall" I thought we might have a scandal on our hands.

This Da turns out to be Info Central - queen of the bar girls. Knows everyone everywhere. Used to work at Long Gun and actually used to work everywhere, but now hangs her hat at Angel Witch. She's a lot of fun to be around. Better be. I'm paying her BF to be part of the nightly entourage. More to follow. . .

WS

Wish I was there for your party, glad I missed the hong naam festivities immediately following.

Let me know when you make plans for your return trip and we'll see about hooking up this next time.

WickedWilly

We'll do another Eden party, deal?

E

As usual, a great, detailed report. Thank you.

WS,

Nice reading about your recent exploits and it's good to hear your going strong! I've been swamped at work since our last trip to Germany, but can't wait to break away sometime soon. I'm getting a little antsy, so i've been at travelocity weekly pricing out different itineraries Given the prices during the summer, I'll probably try to hold out until sept/oct, and make my annual jaunt to bkk and PI.

Happy trails!

-dm

Wallstreet, I'm assuming that your Blackberry didn't work because it didn't have the right band on it for Japan, which is different than anywhere else. I have a 4 band (850/1900 for US, 900/1800 for everywhere else) but it never works in Japan, and it's the only place I'm told it won't work (which so far has been the case in my experience!).

So the original plan was for the three of us to go bowling, but Nueng said said had no power so let's do something else. I told her she could be the big boss tonight and we'll go wherever she wants to go. Well, I got more than I bargained for.

Da met us outside the sushi place and we walked through the market at Patpong past all the bars. There was a lot of talking and giggling going on between the two girls, so I didn't know what was up.

We exited the market and then entered a walkway across the street that was full of go-go bars.

The girls said Da knew someone who works in one of the clubs and they have a good show. OK.

Only problem was they were male go-go bars. Well I've been clubbing in New York and have been been at gay-oriented clubs with girls before, so I went in with an open mind. The minute we walked in I knew I was in for a rough time. The place had a stage crowded with Thai guys dressed in short shorts with numbers. The music was blasting, but they were standing still just looking out into the very dark seating area. We sat at a table near the stage and ordered drinks.

Neung kept asking, you ok, you ok? and I'm like, sure, no problem. Well a whistle goes off and all the guys jump offstage. Three guys come running onstage and start "the show". I don't think I'll ever get the image of the guy with Yakuza-style tattoos ramming his dick up guy number 2's ass while guy number 2 sucks off guy number three. How close were we to the action? Well I could tell that condoms weren't being used. One of the guys working at the club came over to talk to Da. Like I said, she knows everyone.

Thankfully the show ended after about 10 minutes. It was time to move to the next venue, the Hollywood Awards a/k/a Hollywood Disco. Da asked if it was ok if her friend came with us and I said no problem. But I had to pay his barfine to get him out of the club - 300 baht.

So the four of us take a cab to the Hollywood. It's located across the street from Ratchada Seafood. Same set-up as the Coliseum, except here you buy the bottle on the way in. Johnnie Walker Black 1,300 baht - same as the Coliseum.

We get escorted to a table near the stage and this place is packed! It's Monday night in Bangkok and it looks like a Saturday night in New York. Everyone drinking and having a good time.

Same type of show as the Coliseum, but bigger and more elaborate. Tons of hot dancers and an American rapper with boy band moves.

Da's other gay friend from the night before shows up, so now it's a party. The place is not as comfortable as the Coliseum - constant jostling by the crowd, but everyone was cool. Da says her friend (from the gay bar) can get me anything I want, he's well-connected. I play dumb and she says you know, special cigarettes, yaba, etc. So I half jokingly say I'd probably enjoy this club even more if I had some yaba. Fast rattling in Thai back and forth and I'm told yaba no problem 800 baht. My interest is peaked and I say sure, give me a price on 5. He comes back with 700, because I'm a friend. He says it can't be done tonight, but he'll give it to Da tomorrow afternoon. I know, I know - but I like living on the edge sometimes.

So now it's about 2:00am and the show is ending. There's no bill to settle as you pay for the mixers as you go along. We leave and head to an outdoor restaurant on the other side of the parking lot.

We all sit at a table and order several Thai dishes. The food is cheap and good - we don't finish the half of it. I get weird looks and laughed at when I say maybe they can wrap this up to go. I guess the concept of doggie bags hasn't made it across the Pacific.

As we leave I look at crowd. It's 3:00am and the restaurant is packed. I ask Nueng who are all these people and don't they have jobs to go to? She laughs and says these are people who have good mama and papa who take care of them - they don't work only play. Thai trust-fund kids?

The two gay guys head off in seperate taxis and Da, Nueng and I head back to the PS. Da gets comfortable on the couch and Nueng and I retire to the bedroom. Another great day in Bangkok.

WW - I'm sure your going to have a great time in Cuba, especially since your a dancer. Those women LIVE to Salsa. I've been hitting some Salsa clubs in New York, prepping for my trip to Cali in July.

Epi - I'll let you know for sure the next time I'm going to Thailand - of course you'll have been there at least 2-3 before my next trip.

Andres B - Thank, glad you're enjoying the report.

Don Marco - Nice to hear from you! I know how the work thing goes, been getting slammed at the office as well. Glad to see there's a trip in your future. Should be good weather over here in October.

Sojourner - My Blackberry saga could fill it's own report. Here's the lowdown:

I never tried in in Narita, and didn't know Japan ran it's own frequency. Never heard of a quad-band phone - who makes that?

I couldn't get the Blackberry to roam in Bangkok. So I unlocked the phone, went to MBK and bout a DTAC (Happy) SIM. Powered down, inserted the SIM, powered up and 1 minute later I was up and running locally! Didn't have to do anything else.

So the next night, I power down, put in my t-mobile SIM to check emails/voicemails from New York. Power up and it goes into search mode - can't find the network. So I power down, swap sims and power back up. Now the DTAC sim won't work - still searching for a network. So now I'm dead in the water.

My back-up was the cell I bought in the PI in January and I know it works in Thailand. But I forgot the charger.

I know I'm on vacation, but I'm very sensitive to being reachable.

So I borrow Nueng's cell and call t-mobile support in the states. Reach a Blackberry specialist and after 15 minutes, just as he's giving me instructions on how to set the network, her phone runs out of load. Fuck!!! I'm cursing up a storm and Da hands me her cell phone.

I call and get another specialist who talks me through the process. He doesn't know why I was able to automatically get a network automatically on the local sim - he says you have to go into Options, then Network, then Scan for Networks.

Bingo - four available networks come up:

AIS
Orange
DTAC
TH ACT 1800

He says to choose AIS because that's the only network tha t-mobile has a roaming contract with. I find out later (the hard way) THIS IS 100% FALSE.

But I choose AIS, save then register and perfect - a full five bars of reception! I thank the tech and hang up. As soon as I hang up with the tech, I get a message on my Blackberry that says "Data Connection Refused" Fuck!!! What good is a Blackberry with no data connection.

But at least I know I have to set the network. So I power down, but in my DTAC SIM, power up, scan the netwroks and select DTAC. AND IT WORKS!

So at least now I have a local connection.

The next morning, I look at my phone and it's in search mode. So I scan for Networks - but only one comes up:

TH ACT 1900

I click on that, but I don't get a signal. I'm now back to square one. I'm pretty furious by now.

So I go to Pantip Plaza where I need to buy software anyway and buy a small Motorola phone and get my local SIM to work. So put 500 baht on the phone because I'm going call t-mobile and get them to fix this once and for all.

I get another specialist on the phone and he resets my phone. I scan for networks and all four Thai networks come up. This guy tells me I have the choice of AIS or DTAC. I choose DTAC and register the network. Immediately I hear buzzing and 28 emails are downloaded. So now it looks like we are in business!

I now have a local phone and a global phone. I'm very happy.

The next day, I wake up and the phone is in search mode. Looks like you have to set the network daily. I set the network to DTAC, but it's still searching. So I try Orange and get nothing. I then try TH ACT 1800 - AND IT WORKS.

Since then my Blackberry has been working perfectly (3 days in a row!) So it would seem the key to international roaming in Thailand on a t-mobile phone is to use the TH ACT 1800 network.

By the way, in the time that it took to right this up, I received two phone calls on my Thai phone, 1 call on my Blackberry and 3 emails. Nothing life and death, but I do like to stay in the loop.

I'll post this is the Topics section - hopefully this will save someone a lot of time and aggravation

So it's Tuesday late morning/early afternoon. Lounged around with Nueng and although
it's only two days ago, I can't remember what we did before 5pm. Nueng's cell rings and
it's Da saying she'd swing by to pick up the money for the yaba. Well I guess the deal
is on.

We have dinner on Soi 11, a Thai restaurant called Roibeling (sp?) It was ok. Nothing
special, don't recommend.

Da calls and said she'll meet us at the hotel. 5 pink yaba pills for 4,000 baht - the friend discount of 700 per went out the window. Da says it takes 10 minutes to take effect, so we should take them later. It's 10:00pm - too early to go to Hollywood where the girls want to dance while they trip. Over their protests I insist on going to the Q-Bar. The Q-Bar is a classy bar on soi 11, walking distance from the PS, but of course
we took a taxi.

It was a little early for the Q-Bar too. The deal is 500 baht to get in and that gives
you 2 drink tickets. The girls are mad because I spent 1,500 baht and a bottle of Johnnie Walker Black cost 1,300. I try to explain it's 2 different type of places and in 10 years they'll like the Q-bar and it's my money so just chill.

We have our drinks and the girl's insist on tasting my Belvedere Martini, ven though I
tell them they'll hate it. They hate it.

So I pop a pill and the girls share one. We order another drink and wait for something to happen. Nothing. 30 minutes go by. Nothing. Da is really embarrassed - I tell her no problem - at least it didn't kill us.

We take a cab over to the Hollywood. Now here's the great part. I was wondering what would happen to the bottle we didn't finish last night. Apparently someone signed the bottle and they'll keep it for you! They even mark a line to show no one took a swig from your bottle! I only had to pay for the mixers and ice - like 300 baht. Very reasonable.

I basically the same show as the night before. It's now 2 hours since we dropped the yaba and still nothing. The girls are bummed but I'm just happy no one is foaming at the mouth. Then all of a sudden I feel something. Or is it the drinks? No, this feels like something. I turn to Nueng and her pupils are dialated like saucers. It's really feeling good, not too speedy, just good. We groove to the show for 30 minutes and Nueng and Da say it's time to go. I follow their lead into a taxi and they say go to the hotel.

It's really taking effect now, the street lights are streaking into the sky and the music on the radio sounds awesome.

I want to go back to the Q-bar or Onze, but the girls insist on going to the hotel. So we head upstairs and put on MTV. I insist that the girls drink plenty of water and everything is pretty mellow.

It's now about 3:00am and my buzz is staring to wear off and I'm pretty tired, but the girls want to keep going and drop another half each. I say I'm gonna get some sleep and head to bed. I fall asleep right away.

I'm awakened at 4:30am by loud talking. I hope it goes away, but it doesn't, so I get up and enter the living room. Da is talking, so screaming into the phone at someone.

Then I hear this awful grinding noiuse from the kitchen - it's Nueng looking out the window, grinding her teeth like I've never seen before. She tells me to come see the elephants outside the window. This isn't good. Why am I not seeing elephants?

Nueng is so wired, I'm getting nervous. She wants to join the pool party that she insists is going on downstairs. She wonders why I don't see any of this. The mood swings are rapid. She's kneeling and wai-ing in front of me saying she's a bad girl and she's sorry. Da is in control of herself but Nueng, at 4"11, 40 kilos jsut can't handle it. She's bouncing off the walls.

I try to get her to come to bed, but she can't stay still. The girls come up with the bright idea of going to Da's apartment where they can listen to a CD that will calm them down. I think it's a bad idea to go out in public looking like that and dred them making a scene in the lobby.

It takes 15 minutes for Nueng to put her shoes on and I let them out, hoping for the best.

Another 15 minutes goes by and no calls from the lobby, so I think everything is ok. I go back to bed, but sleep isn't as easy to come by as it was 3 hours ago.

The saga will continue. . .

I actually passed up the opportunity to check out a gay bar with my LT in BKK during my last trip, now I'm glad I did. Sounds a bit too raw for me. I kind of wondered why some of these girls ask to go there.

As for the Blackberry, it sounds like a great system to stay in the loop. I'm considering getting the system, especially if it works in LOS. I rely heavily on internet cafes and often times it's difficult to locate them or the connections are bad. In the States T-Mobile has a great wireless hotspot network at all the kinkos, starbucks, and Barnes and Nobles for $30/year unlimited. I understand that a lot of the European areas are similarly connected, perhaps they will expand into Asia soon considering your Blackberry is working there. We'll see.

I went to Rachada Seafood last time, everything was good but we ordered one lobster dish that was smothered with some real thick, butter sauce. Got me a bit sick b/c it was slathered on there. Also, I've been hearing that they use a lot of preservatives and other stuff in the lobster and crab tanks so have been avoiding these places for the most part.

Anyway, great report and great issues to discuss, please keep it coming.

Wallstreet,
My mobile phone is an NEC525 and I have AT&T Wireless GSM service in the states plus international coverage. In Thailand, however, I use another cell phone with a 1-2-Call SIM card. Interesting hearing your problems with Blackberry though. My company has wanted me to get a Blackberry but they didn't have international coverage on their service, so I never bothered. Then I heard they will be getting international service again, so I may be getting one after all... unless of course it really works like crap, which it sort of sounds like from what you're saying....

Sojourner-

I actually highly recommend the Blackberry. Once I figured out the deal about scanning and setting for networks (which I'm sure wa on page 842 of the manual) it has been working great. Receives email instantly and have had 5 bars of signal strength everywhere - once I set it to TH ACT 1800 - which t-mobile does NOT recommend. But that's a t-mobile thing, not a Blackberry thing.

Merl,

I don't understand the Thai girls' fascination with the gay bars but they are really into it. You missed nothing, except I (unfortunately) can tell you that the myth about Asian men not being well-hung did not apply to the guys working in that place. They do an "introductory" walk-through where all the guys are off stage and they come out on stage one at a time with their dicks at full erection and the DJ announces (in English) their name and number.

I wish they had that system in the girl go-go bars. Have them strip and stand on the stage for 10 seconds by themselves, announcing their name and number. Would make the selection process a lot easier - an your seeing exactly what your getting.

The Blackberry is great. Makes sense that they're set up in Europe as t-mobile is the ATT of Germany. Before coming over I called t-mobile and they assured me the roaming would kick in automatically. Had the rep told me I'd have to scan and set the network (which is very easy) I would have avoided a lot of aggravation.

More to come.

Thank you, I enjoy reading your reports. Not only are they interesting but make you realize there is a whole different world out there!

Wednesday

I wake up at 1:30pm to the sound of my Thai cell ringing. I answer and instead of Nueng, its Xeneno who's just settled in at the Dynasty and is raring to go. He's gonna come over and in the meantime I take a shower.

30 minutes later Xen is at the door. I've always admired his reports and his legendary Back and Forth report with D'Art really got me going for my first trip to Thailand. I had the pleasure of meeting Xen in New York a couple months back and he's a great guy to hang out with.

We agreed to check out a massage parlor - he had found one that hadn't been reviewed called Bangkok Cozy on New Petchburi Road, so off we went. Xen is very organized and professional when it comes to hobbying. He had maps printed out, landmarks in sight and wrote down the prices so he could argue with anyone if they tried to tack on the dreaded "white guy surcharge".

We talked to one of the President Solitaire doormen and gave him the name of the road so he could translate it to the driver - something that's very handy to have. Well, I take taxis everywhere, didn't take the Skytrain and their brand spanking new subway is due to open in June, and maybe it was luck, or maybe it was having Nueng at my side, but I didn't hit traffic or any surly taxi drivers so far this trip. That was about to change.

The driver understood New Petchburi Road and you could tell he was very annoyed. He kept saying that New Petchburi is a very long road (true) and he wanted an address. Xen wouldn't give him the name, just in case Bangkok Cozy paid taxi commissions. Xen and the driver kept going back and forth, neither one giving in. I was sitting back enjoying the show. Xen finally budges and said the 2300 block. The driver countered with - need name, numbers hard to read (also true). Xen finally gave in and said Bangkok Cozy Massage. The driver wanted to know why so far, many other massage parlours. Xen said no - Bangkok Cozy. Then Xen noticed the driver hadn't turned on the meter and wouldn't do so even after Xen asked several times. It was about 4:45pm and we were by Asoke Plaza and the driver said he couldn't take us because his shift ended at 6pm and if he took us, he'd be late returning the car to the garage. It was now raining and the driver pulled over under the underpass so we wouldn't get wet and could hail another taxi from there.

Xen was pissed because he was sure the driver wasn't going to get a commission and that's why he wouldn't take us. I was still reserving judgement.

It took us 30 seconds to get another cab and this driver was much more accomodating. He was about 130 years old and spoke no English, but after several tries, he understood New Petchburi and happily went in that direction. We made the turn off Sukhumvit and came to a dead stop. And waited. And waited more. The worst traffic I've ever been in in my five trips to Bangkok. But the driver didn't care and the air conditioning was on, so we just sat back. Like we had a choice. Luckily Xen is a great conversationalist and the time went by relatively quickly.

Xen and I are very different when it comes to the hobby. I just go with the flow and Xen is all about the numbers. He approaches the day with a firm gameplan in hand and his retention of details amazes me. The boy knows his stuff. Me, I'm happy I'm getting laid and I'm happy with one girl taking care of me and having the occassional "tryst" on the side. Anyone who's able to hook up with Xen in "the field" should consider himself lucky. This is also a better board because of his contributions.

It was almost 6:00pm when we hit the 2300 block and we could see Bangkok Cozy across the street. So the first driver was right - it was far, it was bad traffic, and he wouldn't have made it back to his garage. In fact, the traffic was even WORSE going back. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

The meter read 110 baht and I gave Grandpa 200 baht for being such a good sport. The reaction from the driver was one of the highlights of my trip. I have no idea what he was saying, but he was ecstatic. He was grinning from ear to ear, the one tooth in his head gleaming in the rear-view mirror.

Knowing we would never make it across 6 lanes of traffic and a median, we walked to the nearest overpass and quickly made our way to Bangkok Cozy. We enter the parking area and some guys standing outside greeted us and pointed to the door, which is not obvious. We entered with great anticipation wondering if it would be worth the hassle of getting here. We turned the corner and saw the fairly large fishbowl well-stocked with ladies. As we got closer, we knew it was going to be good. There was a LOT of talent behind the glass.

We sat in a booth that was close enough to get a general feel, but too far to read the numbers. The set-up was from left to right with three classes of girls (Xen will correct me if I'm wrong and I think the prices went from 1,300 to 1,600 to 1,800, depending on the color of the girls number. There were also 4 sideline girls - don't remember the price.

A manager sat in our booth and welcomed us. Xen whipped out his notes and confirmed the prices as listed on the website and the the session was 2 hours, not 90 minutes. The prices were the same - no Western surcharge. Xen then insisted that he was going to pay the tab for my girl. I enjoy picking up the check and get embarrassed when someone buys me something, but Xen wouldn't listen to my protestations.

We ordered drinks and looked over the girls. It was really hard to make a choice. Xen had a couple in mind as did I. We then walked over to the glass to get a closer look. We both made our choices, giving the numbers to the manager. He called the two girls out. Here's my knock on massage parlours in Bangkok. There's no interaction (although I found out later - from Xen, that you can call girls out and have a drink with them and not be obligated. But that means nothing, as Xen will attest later, I'm sure).

My girl looked just as good, if not better than she did behind the glass, but she turned out to be a midget. Well, almost. She was the smallest girl I've ever done. Barely came up to my elbow. Number 16, her name was Em, 20 years old and MAYBE 4'9" and 75lbs. The elevator was out of order, so we walked up to the third floor.

The rooms were nice, the only knock I have is there's no toilet - that's down the hall. Otherwise spacious and clean. Em and I settled on the couch and ordered drinks. We got to know each other and as soon as the drinks came and the bath supplies arrived, we started kissing. She knelt down in front of me and undressed me, neatly hanging up my clothes, while the bath was filling.

She stipped down herself, revealing nice b-cups. She had a fine, tight body. Em led me to the bathtub and I got in. She joined me in the tub and starting washing me in a very sensual way. Hmmm, I hadn't been to a massage parlour since my first trip to CP2, in search of the elusive Thip. That session (not with Thip) left something to be desired and I focused on the go-go bars since then, preferring long-time sessions.

The bath took up close to 30 minutes, but I wasn't in a hurry. I had two hours to kill. There's no raft here, but the girl does soap up her tits and scrubs you down with them. Em dried me off and I laid on the bed, waiting for her to join me.

She started off with a nice massage and then I turned over for a very nice BBBJ. After a good fifteen minutes, I stopped her and had her ride me cowgirl. We switched positions sveral times - Em was VERY accomodating and took instruction well. I wasn't taking notes and wound up having three sessions on three different days so it know gets foggy but I think I only popped once with this girl and twice with another girl the next day. So we'll call it one pop about 1:30 into the session. She cleaned me up and rubbed me dowm - Em wasn't in a hurry either.

I then took a shower, dried off and let Em dress me. It was time to go, though no phone call came - this place will give you a 10-minute warning as I found out on Saturday. I had a really good session and I usually overtip anyway, so I gave her 1,000 baht, which obviously made her very happy. If you like VERY small ladies, I highly recommend Em (#16).

We went downstairs and Xen had already finished. I believe he had a very good session too, but I'm sure he'll do a blow-by-blow in his report. The manager thanked us and after he gave me his card, I gave him 100 baht. I was pretty sure I was coming back to this place and I like to have people look out for me. In fact, on Saturday, the manager ALMOST saved me 2 hours of waiting time - but I'm getting ahead of myself. His name is SomSak - he has glasses and a terrible bolbous nose.

We left and hailed a cab and the traffic was bad, but not as bad as coming over. Word to the wise: Do not go to Bangkok Cozy during rush hour or ANYTIME on Friday. The traffic is that bad. Trust me.

Nueng gives me a call as I'm in the cab and apologizes profusely for being a bad girl, swearing to never do it again. I'm just glad she's ok.

Xen gets out near Nana and I continue on to the PS. Sorry again, no notes but as I remember (and I'm typing this on the plane from Bangkok to Tokyo having been up for the past 30 hours and wanting to post this in Narita) we went somewhere for dinner and then went to Onze on Soi 11, a stone's throw from the PS and next to the Q Bar.

Now I didn't know what the deal was with this place, and later found out that D'Art did some research on it a while ago and posted it in the topics section. He gave it a thumbs down - citing cost. I found out information very different from his when I returned on Friday, so they may have changed policy. But you'll have to wait for that. Da joins us outside and we go up the carpeted stairs towards the entrance. There is no cover charge and this is the only place in Bangkok that DOES NOT check id. Not a big deal, but I've taken out several 19-year olds - legal to work in a bar at 19, but must be 20 to enter a club. Makes no sense to me, but it is what it is.

We take a seat at a table by the stage where a live band is playing. Food and drinks are ordered and the girls are digging the music. The band IS very good. I scope out the floor, adjust my eyes to the dim light, and like what I see. There are tons of HOT, well-dressed Thai girls all over. Probably 2-1 girls to guys, all the guys being Thai. Not a Westerner in sight. I thought some of the guys were Japanese and there was a sushi station, but Neung insisted all the men were Thai, no Japanese. I figure she knows better than me.

There are super hot girls behind the bar, not making drinks, but serving them. Are they available? Don't know. At one point, 4 Thai-mafia looking guys walked past us over to a wall and a hidden door opens! You can see an elevator in the back, going up four floors. A few minutes later, 3 of the hottest Thai girls I've ever seen make their way through the door. I ask later and am told there are Karoke rooms upstairs. I still can't figure out what's going on with the girls, and resign myself to coming back alone before 10pm when it's quiet and I can ask some questions. It's close to 2am and I ask for the bill. I had a few Pina Coladas, the girls had a drink a piece and we ordered some food. Drinks are 200 baht each - I think very reasonable for this place. Bill was 1,300 and they take AMEX (frequent flyer miles). A good time was had by all.

We walk to the PS and go upstairs. After watching TV, Neung and I leave Da in the living room and go make some noise in the bedroom.

Thursday

Woke up on the late side to the telephone. My shirts from Versaces were downstairs and did I want them sent up? Hell yeah, seeing as I only packed 3 and was sending two out everyday for cleaning. They looked great. Versaces did a first class job. What I also liked about them - they aren't pushy. I like the work done at Louis Tailors, but they keep hounding you to buy another coat, another suit. It's tiring after a while and I knew I only wanted shirts and would be hassled to by a fuckin' tuxedo and whatever else. So on Wicked Willy's recommendation, Versaces got my business and I wasn't disappointed.

The two brothers who run the place were really cool and when they found out I was from New York, they politely asked if I could recommend any good reasonable hotels as they are coming over in October to measure US-based customers for suits. Last year, they stayed at some flea-bag motel in Carnarsie, Brooklyn for $169 a night and said they were afraid. I told them they should have been afraid. Indians in that neighborhood are not welcome. I gave them three recommendations off the top of my head and will email them more. Real nice guys.

Neung went home after our morning romp. I decided to check out the Ananda Spa downstairs at the PS. They had a package for 2,900 baht for a three hour treatment -Body polish (exfoliation) herbal facial and an aromatherapy massage. The place is pricy, but it's first class all the way. I like to pamper myself a little and I felt pretty all over afterwards. I know, I repulse myself too sometimes. Afterwards, I went to Pantip Plaza to pick up literally $10,000 worth of software for about $75 (130 baht per cd). I hadn't eaten, so while I was waiting for the software to be burned, I went up to the third floor where they have a really good food court. A plate of rice and your choice of three Thai dishes for 40 baht. And another 10 baht for water. It was really good.

I know most people don't like tuk-tuks and the US Embassy warns against taking them, but it was about 6pm when I finished at Pantip, traffic was snarled and there wasn't a taxi to be had. So I took a tuk-tuk back to the PS. Apart from the fumes, it was great. Made great time and the driver was very cool. And once you've ridden a trike in Angeles City, you'll think a Bangkok tuk-tuk is a Cadillac in comparision. Much more comfortable and the fumes didn't get to me like they did in AC. Not that Bangkok is anything to write about environmental-wise.

Made it to the PS in about 15 minutes. Didn't negotiate a fare, just handed the driver 100 baht and he was happy.

Neung called and said she'd be at the hotel at 8:00pm. On the dot she arrived, me having taken a nap. We went to the Major Mall, which has a really nice movie theatre and a bowling alley. We opted for the bowling. After 10 straight gutter balls, Nueng gave up. My yelling "lang-ho" (gutterball) everytime probably didn't help either. The Thais are not very competitive, at least in bowling. I didn't have an open frame going into the 8th and was on course for about 230. Just as I'm ready to bowl, Nueng screams to stop. She looks at the clock and says wait. Apparently at exactly 10pm all the bowlers line up and bowl at the same time. The first player (if any) to strike wins a bottle of whiskey. I waited a couple of minutes and when it was time, I slipped and threw a gutter ball.

Lang-ho, Lang-ho yelled Nueng. The tables were turned. It was a good time and the first time I ever ate octopus while bowling. Then it was time to move on.

Nueng wanted to go to Soi Cowboy and Da was going to meet us there. In Bangkok for 5 days and this would be the first go-go I was in. And I didn't miss it.

Called Xen and told him I'd let him know which bar we were at. The girls wanted to see the show at the Long Gun. I avoided the Long Gun on my last trip, not wanting to deal with Nat a/k/a Ohm or any of the girls I had BFed out of that bar. But Long Gun it was and we walked in the door. Xen said he'd meet us shortly.

Da, Nueng and I sat down and it took 30 seconds for me to see Nat. She saw me and the girls right away and started dancing in front of a guy seated on the other side of the stage. Honey, I'm with two girls, you're not gonna make me jealous.

Xen joined us quickly and the drinks started to flow. Both Xen and I remarked that there was A LOT of talent on-stage. I know the LG takes a lot of hits on the board, but on the nights I've been there, I've seen a lot of very doable girls. I guess it's just timing as things change quickly.

I decide to send over a drink to Nat just to stir things up a little. She comes over, doesn't say anything, bangs glasses and downs her Jack and Coke down in one gulp. Then walks away. She dances on stage and Xen is hooked, very much considering BFing her. I give him the lowdown - she's great for short-time (Xen's specialty anyway) but you don't know which Nat you're gonna get. She can be a real dynamo in bed and she can be real erratic. Pot luck. We noticed that she added nipple rings to her repetoire in addition to her pierced clit and double-studded tongue. Hate to admit it, but she was looking HOT. Not beautiful, but very, very sexy. And just turned 19.

After her set, I send over another drink. This time she spends some time with us and I introduce her to Xen. My girls are just watching, not saying a word. I ask Nat for her number and she says she doesn't have a phone. Xen and I say every bar girl has a phone but then she gives me her number saying it's still the same. Then it hits me - she either doesn't want me to see the $300 phone I bought her two trips ago or has sold it for another model. Like I care.

She walks away and Neung comes over and says if I want to BF any ladies it's no problem. Not that I need permission, but I thought that was a nice thing to say. That's why I keep her around.

Nat comes back again and we order Tequila for everyone, but my girls pass. I think Nat does 2 and I know Xen did 2 and then Nat disappears. Xen is pretty sure he's going to BF Nat, so I walk over to the Mamasan, who I really like and had bought a drink for when we first walked in and beat Xen to the punch. I wanted to give him a gift to remember.

Of course as is Nat's style, she was nowhere to be found. After 15 minutes, the mamasan came over and said Nat accepts the BF, but she's very drunk and throwing up at Long Gun 3. Xen said it best: I didn't even know there was a Long Gun 2. They own two other bars, Midnite and something else, so maybe that's what she was referring to. Nat comes in with a towel over her mouth, obviously fresh from the can. She comes over and without missing a beat, asks if I can BF her lesbian friend, whose name I can't remember (Bim, Bum?). Sure, why not. Let Xen go to town, although Bim has been known to pull a runner too.

Xen is now very drunk and very excited. This could be a match made in go-go bar heaven. It's about 1am and we exit the bar. We take cabs over to the PS and go upstairs - but I can't remember why. I wanted to take everyone to Onze but Nat asked if I'm stupid, she's only 19 and can't get in. By the way, the answer is yes, I'm stupid. So Xen and his two girls go over to Soi 7 and me and my girls decide it's not worth going to Onze, as it's 1:30 and they're about to close.

So back up we go, not having caused too bad of a scene in the lobby. Then the usual routine of TV and another great session with Neung.

Friday

Neung shocked me in the morning by saying she was going to get her hair done and color it blond. I was all for it and suggested we go over to Soi 16 to Areca, a great beauty salon with a 30-something Thai woman owner who I find hot. And her workers aren't bad either. It's located opposite the very good restaurant Kuppa, which is next door to the Somerset Lake Point, a fine serviced apartment complex that I stayed at on my third trip.

The owner was very happy to see us (we went there together in January) and had Neung sit down. Much to my pleasant surprise, they expanded their operations to include an upscale Massage center on the second floor. I decided to get a two hour oil massage while Neung got her hair done.

The lone masseuse was AWESOME - one of the best massages I've ever gotten. What I remember of it anyway as I dozed off midway through. After the two hours, I went downstairs and got a haircut. Very nice job. Neung wound up waiting for me to get done. I spend more time at the beauty parlour than a girl. Of course I need a lot more help in the beauty department then Neung does. Neung's hair was no longer jet black, but it wasn't really blond either, just lighter. She was very happy with the cut and color. Now the service was first class, but I found it a little pricy. No prices are listed so I don't know which services cost what, but the total bill was 5,500 baht, half the price of New York, but I thought a tad expensive for a free-standing salon deep on Soi 16. I will go back again, but beware it ain't cheap.

We head back to the PS and Xen calls wanting to do something. I said I was up for anything and let Neung have the afternoon off. Xen came over and we decided to try another unreviewed massage parlour, Zodiac. The address was very close to Bangkok Cozy so if the place sucked, we could always walk across the street. It wasn't quite 3pm so we had a shot at avoiding the rush hour traffic.

We went downstairs and got a cab who had kept offering to take us to Cupidy. He evn turned into the Cupidy parking lot. That 500 baht commission must be hard to pass up. We made decent time and although the number is very close to that of BC, it was a good klick down the road on the opposite side.

We entered and was disappointed to see only three girls, none in the same class as those of BC. We chalked it up to the early hour and headed towards the BC. It was about 3:45pm and there were a good amount of girls behind the glass. We took a seat in the front booth and almost immediately identified two prospects sitting on the right side with one girl between them. One was very animated and the other wasn't. I liked them both and so did Xen. I suggested we take them both before someone else grabbed them as businessmen were starting to walk in. I gave the numbers to SomSak who was very happy to see us. I wound up giving the wrong number and the center girl was called out. We both started shouting "no, no" and I went right up to the glass, got the right numbers and SomSak called out our ladies.

I deferred to Xen and he picked the animated one, me taking a girl in white who had some clevage showing. Xen suggested we have drinks with the girls first, which I didn't know you could do. If you get a bad vibe, you're under no obligation to take the girl. Animated girl sits next to Xen and is very talkative. My girl sits next to me and doesn't say a word. Xen's girl does all the talking and mine just sits there not saying a word and not smiling. Looks like Xen got the better end of the deal.

We take the girls upstairs and go to our respective rooms. I order drinks and start up a conversation with my girl Ae (# 157). She starts to loosen up and things are looking up. I find out she's 19, been working at BC for a year and comes from Sukothai (sp?) a 7-hour bus ride from Bangkok (300 baht each way) as opposed to a one-hour plane ride at 2,000 baht each way. She deems Sukothai the second prettiest place in Thailand after Uden (sp?). It's time for the bath and after undressing me she takes off her clothes. What a smoking body! Baby c-cups pointing up - my favorite. I am cursing myself for not bringing my camera - they are a sight to behold. Not perfect, but pretty awesome. She's about 5'6 and has a tiny bit of baby fat which she is very self-conscious about, but I find her superb.

She gets into the tub and starts washing me very thoroughly. I enjoy every minute. We head over to the bed and she starts with a great massage. I turn over and she starts with a great BJ. OK guys, here's the negative - she doesn't do BBBJ. I ask twice and she declines, but for me her body and personality make up for it. After about 15 minutes I pop. We head over to the couch and relax, After about 15 minutes I go back on the bed, which surprises her a little but she doesn't hesitate to join me. Start again with a CBJ then move onto several positions including one new one for me (hard to describe - had to be there).

I could have popped again in 15 minutes, but I savored every moment and lasted an hour. We cleaned up and then headed downstairs.

Xen was done and disappointed. His girl turned out to be a loser - total opposite of her act at the table. Goes to show it's a total crapshoot.

We say good night to SomSak and Xen wants to see if there's a better selection at Zodiac as it's now primetime. Maybe 2 more girls. Cross Zodiac off the list. It's starting to rain and things go downhill from there. Traffic is so backed up going in our direction that we decide to chance it and hail a cab in the other direction, hoping he knows another way to get back. Might have worked, except we couldn't catch a cab to save our lives. 20 minutes, nothing. Xen wants to take a cab in the traffic jam, but I suggest we walk to the next major intersection which is at least a mile away. Xen isn't thrilled but agrees. The traffic is so bad that we make substantially better time than the cars in the parking lot known as New Petchburi Road. We get to the intersection and once you pass the light, things start moving. We spot an empty cab and head back to our respective hotels. Xen wants to get in a good session and I'm spent. We agree to hook up later.

I get a call from I am Sancho who's in town for one night only before heading off to Vietnam. I hooked up with IAS in New York a couple months back and have always enjoyed his posts. He doesn't have a working cell and I'm not sure of the plans, so he says he'll call at 8:30pm. Nueng calls and says she's at the hotel, seconds befor I arrive. Great timing.

We decide to start the evening at the Coliseum and then hit Spasso. Da and Cie (the gay third wheel) meet us at the Coliseum. Tonite there's a special band "Latin in Love" so there's a cover of 200 baht, but that also gets you an hour of Karoke, one game of free bowling and I think a free car wax. OK, I made the last one up.

Same deal, bottle of Johnnie Walker Black and we order food, which turns out to be pretty good. Before the main act, they have several routines, including maybe the most bizarre live act I've ever seen anywhere. Three guys come out and are dressed in masks, one is Saddam Hussein, couldn't figure out the other two (but they were Westerners) AND they were dressed as amputees. They had one leg bent at the knee so it looked like a stump and they were dancing and kicking on their one "good" leg. Totally bizarre and incomprehensible but I couldn't stop watching.

IAS called - he just finished up a session at Eden's and said he'd swing by. 30 minutes later he showed up and we had a great conversation. Really great guy is IAS. He was really looking forward to his first ever trip to Vietnam. And I'm looking forward to the report.

Latin in Love comes on and performs a bunch of Gloria Estefan, Ricky Martin and Shakira. The crowd loves it. It's about 11:30 and we decide to head to Spasso. I give Xen a call and he's just picked up a cutie and is gonna meet us there. Spasso is in the basement of the Grand Hyatt Erawan and I've read that there are fine freelancers that work out of there. We pull up to the hotel, a real swanky joint and are led to a staircase that goes down to Spasso. It's 600 baht to get in, but that includes two drinks. I pay with my Amex and we head in.

Spasso was THE biggest disappointment of the trip. The mix: 60% Western men, 20% their Western wives and 20% the ugliest looking freelancers in Bangkok. And older. And ugly. Did I mention ugly. This was worse talent than at the WORST bar in AC. They were dressed upscale, but who cares. Unreal. And the place is packed. We can't get a table and Nueng doesn't look happy. I tell her I'm going to call Xen and tell him not to come. He answers and says he's just arrived. I feel bad and tell him to come down and I'll pay the entry fee for him and his girl. Xen, pulling the move of the night, avoids the staircase and enters through the elevator lobby which puts him PAST the table where you pay the fee. Nice move!

We sit down and I tell him how bad it is, but he doesn't care, he's in love. He's found himself a Juliette Lewis look-a-like, replete with braces.

We walk in towards the girls and I give Xen two drink tickets, figuring we'll leave right away. But Neung shocks me and says she LOVES the place. The live band playing is very good and playing some good tunes. So we stay a little while. Xen and Juliette hit the dance floor and my girls are having a ball.

We spend an hour there and I stare at amazement at the drecks working the joint. And the businessmen loving it. I really don't think these guys know where Nana or Cowboy is. I think they're here on business and think they've struck gold at Spasso. Oh well, not my problem.

We all leave and go over to Onze. Once again they don't card anyone, which is good for Juliette as she isn't 20. No overt cover charge, but they did charge 100 baht per person on the final bill.

Another good band and lots of good-looking, well-dressed, young Asian beauties. What I thought Spasso would be. We order drinks and everyone is having a good time. Xen and Juliette leave around 1:30 and my girls want to go get some noodles. I beg off and tell them I'll meet them at the hotel. 15 minutes to closing - please someone make a move. But nothing. What's the deal? Shortly the lights come up and it's time to leave. I pay the bill and start to exit. One of the doormen asks if I had a good time and I tell him I'm looking for a good time. I explain I'm looking for a lady and what was the deal here?. He said there are girls available but it's up to you to negotiate when the bar closes - there is no barfine structure. He said no problem to get a lady. Unfortunately the timing wasn't right, but next time I'll get there early and talk to one of the male bartenders and make him my best friend. How good-looking were these girls? I would have gone 6,000 for the night. Best looking, best dressed girls I've seen. Of course that doesn't mean they'd be good performers, but I'm willing to give it a chance. Next time. Went back to the PS and won't bore you with the same old routine. But it was good.

I just landed at Narita, Sunday afternoon. Here's the nice thing about club access. The connecting flight to New York is delayed 4 hours. But at least I have free food/drinks and internet/electric outlets. And I'll be able to finish and post the report before leaving. They just redid the Northwest World Club - it's decent. As opposed to the shithole at Don Muang called Louis Tavern. They have nothing - cookies and drinks. No internet (or you can pay 100 baht for 20 minutes) and do you think they have shower? Why would they - they don't even have A FUCKIN TOILET!!! You have to leave "the club" and use the public restroom that had no toilet paper. What a joke. And it's open to the public - anyone crazy enough to fork over whatever baht they're getting for entry. Whatever the airlines (and there's a lot of them) pay to have use of the facilities should know it's not worth it. Okay, no sleep, 4 hour delay, I'm a little grumpy. Back to the good stuff.

Saturday

So my last day in Bangkok. Get up pretty early and hit Chatuchak, the weekend market for gifts for home. Got there at 9:30am - wasn't crowded and wasn't hot. Picked up some nice stuff for some people back home.

Got back to the PS and was tired. Plan was to hit Khao Sahn Road tonite, a place I'd never been.

I decided to take a nap as I was going to go straight to the airport for my 6:15am flight. My plan was to finish my report by Narita, post it in Japan, and then sleep all the way to New York. Thanks to the 4 hour delay, I'll be able to do that.

Neung wasn't tired and said she had some errands to run. I told her not to come back early, let's meet at the hotel at 8:00pm. No problem.

I woke up at 2pm and figured out the gameplan. I was going to go back to Bangkok Cozy, figuring it was early enough and there shouldn't be traffic at 3:00pm. I was right. The driver flew over to New Petchberi Road in under 20 minutes. Real nice driver. I asked him to pull over, but he said, no, let me swing around. Of course, swinging around on New Petchberi means going a mile out of your way. And there was traffic on the other side! I let out an audible groan and he said don't worry, only take 10 minutes. It's now 3:30 and I decide to call SomSak on his cell. He remembers me and I tell him I'm 3 minutes away - please pull 157, same girl as yesterday. He said no problem, I get her now. Two minutes later I'm inside and much to my dismay, a local Thai had just pulled her out. SomSak was apologetic, but it wasn't his fault. Ae looked dismayed - gave me a "what can I do"? look.

So what to do? I sat in a booth and decided. I was going to wait. There were plenty of girls in the fishbowl, but I had a feeling I was two hours away from a special session. And I brought my camera this time. So I kicked back, ordered some food and a soft drink and watch the show.

Fellas, if you're gonna go to Bangkok Cozy, and I recommend that you do, get there between 2 and 3pm on a Saturday, if you can. You'll avoid the traffic and there are tons of hot-looking girls available. Here's the lowdown (from Ae): The majority of the girls get there at 2pm. She gets there at 3pm. Everyone who's on duty is supposed to be there by 4pm. There are 120 girls on the payroll and 80 work per shift. Saturday is their busiest day - so there were never more than 40 available girls behind the glass -the rest were upstairs working. And the nice thing about getting there early is you see the girls up close as they walk by the booth on the way to the fishbowl at the start of their shift. There's no "employee" entrance, they walk right by you. It was a beautiful parade.

I'm figuring this guy isn't going to take the full 2 hours, but I was wrong. At 5:25, SomSak tells me the guy just got the ten-minute phone call. Put me in coach, I'm primed and ready for action.

Ae comes down and is shocked to see me still there. Why you wait for 2 hours, many beautiful ladies? Yeah, but none as beautiful as you. The pak-wan was starting, softening her up for the photo shoot.

We went upstairs and she attacked me on the couch, even before the bath supplies arrived. She took out her phone to show me pictures of her family, and 100 baht note fell out. Her tip from the guy who beat me to the punch. She said he fucks for 5 mnutes and sleeps until the phone rings. Once a month, like clockwork. Had to be this Saturday, right?

So after showing me the photos, I take out my camera. She doesn't want me to take any photos, but I talk her into it. But it was flat-out refusal for any nudes. Got some towel shots, but that's it. I'll send them to Hombre on Monday.

We went over to the bed and the session that ensued was one of the best in my life. Only popped once, but it was awesome. Ae gave me her number and asked me to call her from New York. Might be time to move Neung out of the steady rotation and bring in Ae for the next trip. We'll see how it goes.

I tried again for the nudes, but she held her ground. Even offered money, but the girl couldn't be bought off. I still have the memories, but would have liked to share. What a great girl. If anyone partakes, tell her you know Andrew from New York. Maybe it'll help.

It was now 7:30 and I headed towards the PS. I called Neung and she was running late, so I decided to hit Lólita's. There's a ton of stuff I wanted to do but didn't and I was determined to get a great BBBJ.

The driver dropped me off on Soi 8 and I didn't see Lólita's to the right and walked all the way down the Soi, thinking the hotel with the green neon L at the end was Lólita's. I walked all the way back and spotted it on the second try. There were at least 8 girls waiting outside and one girl and customer at the bar. No one upstairs. Someone recommended a particular girl to me and when I asked for her, of course she turned out to be the girl with the only other customer. I think he had just finished, but wasn't in a hurry to leave and I was running late.

A real hag entered the bar and attached herself to me and the girl I asked for said she was a friend. Now what do I do? There were some hot, young-looking girls waiting outside and two of them came in. I don't want the hag to lose face, so I take her and one of the hot girls upstairs. I figured the hag had to have great game with that face and body. I was wrong. She used way too much teeth, so I politely pushed her to the side and let the young hottie work on me. Didn't get her name but she was awesome. Great b-cups too. Nueng called just as I was ready to pop - I told her I was almost there.

5 minutes later I exploded - for me, there's nothing like a great BBBJ. I tipped the girls 500 each and settled up the bill. I love Lólita's.

Headed to the PS and Nueng was ready. I cleaned up and we met Da and Cie downstairs. Took a cab to Kao Sahn Road, the place for backpackers. We had some decent Thai food at a place showing a Manchester United game. I had almost gone a whole trip avoiding the hooligans, until now. Just not my style. Put Kao Sahn Road on the been there, done that list. Lots of young Westerners throwing up in the street. Next.

The plan was to go to Gulliver's, but the place was standing room only. The girls then got the bright idea of getting their hair corn-rowed. It took two hours and I got a great cheap massage while they got their hair done.

It was time to head back to the hotel. The girls packed while I cleaned up and Neung and I had our final session. I settled the bill downstairs. The PS was solid - really friendly staff. The internet was down for two solid days and the wireless connection never worked and the hard line would go out at least once a day. Otherwise it was great.

Taxi came at 4:00am and the girls saw me off to the airport, as Neung lives next to the airport. Took twenty minutes to get there. Said goodbye. No tears, no regrets. Had an awesome time.

Sat in the crappy lounge for 15 minutes, then went to the gate. Plane took off 15 minutes early but I'm still in Tokyo for another 2 hours. At least the lounge is comfortable and I was able to finish the report before I get home. Back to work tomorrow.

After every trip I say this was the best trip ever. And I'll say it again this time. I didn't golf, didn't fish but I had a great time. Wanted to go to the PTT Raceway a US$1.4 million indoor track on the second floor of the RCA building on New Petchberi, but never had the time. The cars go up to 65 miles per hours.

Neung is a sweet girl and took care of me, but it's time to move on to another adventure. The next trip, whenever it is will have a different flavor, but hopefully will be as good as this one. Or better.

I'll send the photos to Hombre on Monday.

Okay, I'll ask...what is yaba?

WS, I can totally relate to waiting for a girl in an MP. My last session with the famous Tip at CPII was on a Christmas Day. She was to be my "present" before spending the evening with the GF. I called her to confirm that she was working that day, but when I finally arrived, she had been taken.

The mamasan told me she was only 30 minutes into the two hours. So I did what any sane mongering fool would do for Tip. I waited! Bought a cola, sat down by the wall, and watched as the bowl turned. Luckily, she finished 30 minutes early, so I only had to wait an hour. Even better, the guy never fucked her. She told me that he was a wacko who came into sleep with her every couple of months, but never had sex. My jaw dropped at the notion of not having sex with the woman who set the soapie gold standard in Thailand. But hey, fresh pussy for me!

The resulting photo session is posted on this board as evidence of what can happen when one exerts a little patience. Anyway, thanks for the report; as usual it made for fun reading. Hope to bump into you one of these days.

M

It was nice to meet you again WS. I had a great time at the Coliseum. Sorry to hear that Spasso didn't work out so great. After I left I wound up with a waitress out of Midnight on Soi Cowboy and it was one of the awesomest sessions ever.

Murasaki: Despite your Asian handle, you need to check out Brazil. While I did not particularly hit it off with Tip, I did notice that everything about her that could appeal to us hombres, is par for the course in Brazil. One of these days I am hoping to see you here (yes, I currently am down here in Brazil, although can't say for how long).

WS, it was great meeting you. Thanks for introducing me to that disco. I frequent discos often, but usually with budget-minded disco freelancers who do things street level. The service that we got in your presence was unbelievable, all for a decent price. My drink never reached the halfway point before our personal waiter refilled. Your date and her friends were great as well. Neung is such a cutie with a real free spirit. Hard to believe she's a gogo dancer as she resembled a hot university student you'd see on the BTS! Her friend Da seemed nice too. If I didn't already have 4 sessions (2 bbbjtc, 2 cp) that day with 2 different gals and have plans to meet up with one after the disco, Da would definately be a contender.

too many girls, not enough time....

LAG, as you well know, Brazil is on the list. If all goes well in the next few weeks, my first trip after a disastrous year and a half will be this fall to Asia. Brazil would most likely follow in the spring.

Socrates, in an essay not to exceed a few hundred words, please describe for the audience the differences between a "gogo dancer" and a "hot university student" in Bangkok. In my mind, and experience, they can, and frequently are, one and the same. Not to mention all the university students who "freelance" for spending money... In fact, I have posted pictures on this board of a dancer out of Voodoo who was also a senior at one of the better universities in Bangkok. Student by day, poo ying by night. Bless her heart....

Travelsrr
Ya is Thai for medicine or drug-- Ba is Thai for crazy. Put it together and what do you have ???

Wallstreet,
I agree with you about Q-bar. I really like the place and on busy nights, there is some nice action there although it doesn't always jump out at you like at Nana or Cowboy. It's also classy enough to take your girl too and not be embarrassed. Well, ok, maybe not always... last time I was there I had one of my regular gf's in tow and some guy felt her up as we were pushing our way through the crowds. She turned around and slugged him...gotta love that about her. I've had a couple 'regular' gf's that I've gone there with and they tell me it's where a lot of the 'in' crowd goes, so I guess that makes me almost in? Love the story of taking the taxi from the PS. Haha... it's a wonder the taxi didn't take you the long way around just to get more than the base fare. Last time in BKK, I stayed at PS and enjoyed the convenience to Q-Bar. Always wondered about Onze, so maybe I'll have to check it out, although sounds like might be better not to go to that one solo. Your experience with Spasso sounds similar to mine. I've seen it very hit or miss. There have been times when I've seen some great ladies and others when it was nothing but dogs. I think maybe it's related to how many businessmen are in the hotel on any given night, and how picked over the selections are. It's also way to crowded on the weekends for what they've got, and the ladies tend to be overpriced when they are decent. I've had a similar experience in Riva at the Sheraton, but better luck generally at CM2 at the Novotel Siam Square.

Thanks Khun.

Sojourner
The taxi drivers love to get fares that only go a few blocks. They make 35 baht for going where they were formerly going empty for nada !! When I stay at PS I frequently end up taking taxis to and from Foodland only on Soi 5 -a 10 minute walk--because Da hates to walk. Hell, she calls a taxi on Sukhumvit at Soi 11 when we get off Skytrain just to ride the 4 blocks to the PS !!The drivers are all amused but love the trip !!

Murasaki: I'm sure Socrates will weign in, but for me the big difference is they way they dress. In my third report, after I meet Neung for the first time, my initial remark was that she dresses like a University student, not like a bar girl. To me, that's a big turn on. Socrates was also amazed that she was laughing at all the jokes during the show and having a great time. He had had a run of jaded girls and Neung is nothing if not jaded. Plus I like her physical appearence.

Sojourner/KM: living in NY, I walk EVERYWHERE, especially when the weather is good. I lucked out this week and the weather was on the cool side, thanks to a lot of rainstorms, not typical weather for Bangkok in May. Twice Nueng was actually cold OUTSIDE. Man, I've NEVER been cold in Bangkok, but I don't weigh 80lbs either.

As KM said they get 35 baht for the first 2 (or is it 3) kil., so they love going down the block. Taxi drivers in NY are all about the quick pick up/drop off. They make very little money sitting in traffic.

I'l have to try CM2 next time.

By the way, I'm totally inundated at work, but managed to send off the photos to Hombre on Tuesday. Nueng you've seen, although the jury is still out on the last set of her in corn rows, but I was very pleased with the shots of Ae from Bangkok Cozy. We'll see what everyone else thinks.

Murasaki, I wasn't trying to be analytical or anything, and didn't know many university students work at the gogos. I was just stating a first impression that had. When I first met Neung, her innocent looks and something about her demeanor made it difficult for me to imagine her pole dancing at NEP is all.

WS, a friend of mine is a freelancing junkie. About 2 weeks ago, he told me that because of the recent bust at CM2 and the influx of middle eastern or indian customers (don't remember which) that have been frequenting the joint lately, that the quality and number of TGs have been going downhill. Maybe someone who has been there recently can say for certain.

Photos: Neung 01 02 03 04 05 06 07 08

Photos: Neung and Da 09 10

Photos: Cozy 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22

Hate to criticize anyone's pics (thanks for submitting them, some cuties to be sure), but those corn rows -- YUCK!

I agree. Thank God she got them on the last night. And cost me $50 (for both girls). The cornrow stylists were doing a brisk business on Kho Sahn Road. Just another reason for me not to go back there.