Believe it or not, I never really wanted to go to Pattaya. I’d heard the beach was ugly and there wasn’t much to do. Well, nothing much other than getting drunk and getting laid. However, I had a pal living there and I was a bit curious.

The bus dropped me off on the highway so I took a moto into town. Now, this is the second week of January, so I figured that things would be somewhat slow. Uh, uh. The two hotels I had noted were both full. I called my pal, El Diablo. We agreed to meet at Tahitian Queen on the beachside road. It’s a small, but nice bar, but there were no girls of interest to me there.

El Diablo showed up and we went down the infamous Walking Street. This is just a section of the beach road that they close to traffic in the evening. It’s terrific for taking evening strolls.

Anyway, El Diablo gets me set up in a serviced apartment belonging to a mutual friend. I can only get the place for two nights. I dump my kit and we head to his favorite haunt, Buffalo Bar.

Buffalo is too quiet, all the good-looking gals have been snatched up, El Diablo tells me. We chat over drinks. When he leaves, I grab a moto back to the beach. I stroll down Walking Street and get my bearings.

There are bars everywhere. There are girls everywhere. There are guys everywhere. There are families and couples. Huh? There are a surprising number of couples and many have kids in tow. I discover they’re all Europeans. There are also a disproportionate number of Russians. I’m annoyed by the fact that many of the Russian gals are knockouts and I’m suddenly hungry for white meat.

The sheer number of drinking establishments staggers me. By the time I leave, I come to the conclusion there must be one bar for every single foreigner.

I go into as many go-go bars as I can. I do my best to dodge the waitresses so I can avoid buying a drink, but end up sitting down in too many places. Some of the bars are damn fun and I’m tempted to stay, but I’m on an exploratory mission!

One bar I fall in love with very quickly. Just as I arrive, the girls clear the stage, the lights change and another set of dancers arrive. Within minutes they’re naked. They’re gorgeous. They have killer bodies and they have no clothes. One in particular catches my eye. She’s has large Chinese or Japanese characters tattooed down her back. Combined with short hair and a sultry dance style, I know I’ve found my mate for the night. It was just a matter of waiting for the show to end and getting her before someone else moved in.

Just then a bell rang. Not the drink bell, a bad bell. I knew it was a bad bell because the girls scrambled from the stage, grabbing their outfits as they went. Girls from around the room jumped up on stage and began dancing. A very Thai looking guy came in, walked around the place like he was looking for something. None of the girls asked him if he wanted a drink. He left and the staff visibly relaxed. Obviously, he was a cop making sure the “no showing” rule was being upheld.

I waited around for a long time hoping the girls would come back out. It occurred to me that they could be part of a troupe that goes from bar to bar and they were done here. I decided to move on myself.

By the time 2AM is approaching, I still have not found a sweet young thing to take home with me. The bar I’m sitting in has plenty of babes, but I just can’t seem to connect with any of them. Fat German guys in front of me are fondling the girls. They seem to love the attention. I can’t bring myself to do the same. (It sucks to have been raised a gentleman.)

I’m chatting with one girl who is quite cute. She says she wants to go with me. Mamasan says the girl wants to go with me, but the little voice in my head is telling me she doesn’t want to go with me. She just wants you to pay bar. For once, I listen.

At 2:30, the bar is still open, but I leave. There are plenty of girls in the street, but I still can’t find something that appeals to me. I’m very annoyed with myself. Earlier that day, during our Sunday brunch, I admitted to Epithemeus that I lost my mojo. I’m more convinced then ever as I go home alone.

The next day I sleep in a bit, but I’m up and out by 10AM. Walking street looks like a ghost town. The shops, few exceptions, are closed. It’s not until it’s close to noon before the place wakes up.

Some girls on the beach are doing a survey. I know it’s a bit of a scam, but I’ve got time to kill. I win a barbeque and a chance at a digital camera, a one-week vacation package or a hundred bucks. I just have to sit through a 1-hour sales spiel.

I go to an office on the next beach down the road where I have to put up with some English bastard trying to be my good pal. Satisfied we’re now chums, he starts telling me what a great opportunity buying a timeshare is. The sales manager follows up with all the usual sales tricks. Although never a sales person, I’ve read enough books to know exactly what they’re up to.

Sales manager sees that I’m not going to bite so tells my good English friend to show me what I’ve won. He scratches the box and … I’ve won a week vacation in any one of thousands of resorts owned by the company.

It’s not until later that I check the fine print. I have to send 1000THB handling charge to an address in Chaing Mai. There’s no indication as to when I’ll receive a reply or what restrictions are attached to the holiday. You can bet your boots I didn’t kiss my money goodbye on that one.

Oh, the free barbeque? That’s just some re-heated fried rice and vegetable noodles.

I do another survey of the bars, this time heading down the beach road and exploring some of the sois there. I find myself in a bar some friends used to tell me about. Inside, I get to chatting with the manager. He’s older than I am, but ended up marrying a teenager a couple of years ago. Yikes!

He offers to introduce any of the girls to me. Instead, I get him to tell me about the ones he knows. I figure I can compare the personality with the looks and settle on a couple before meeting them.

The one I’m most fascinated by is one who was just hired. Kai is barely 4’10” and so cute it makes me want to pick her up and carry her home right away. She’s quite happy to go with me, she says, but she’s on her period. Damn! We calculate that she will be fresh the day after tomorrow, so I tell her I’ll pick her up then. Meanwhile, I explain, I will take another girl. This is OK for her and I establish the fact that I’m a butterfly.

I’m also tempted by one of the older girls. She’s heavily tattooed, bleached hair, muscular (but not hard bodied) and looks like she has an attitude. Not really my type but if I where ultra horny, this would be my girl because she looks soooo bad.

I’m not horny though; I want some good lovin’ from a fine woman. I follow his advice and decide on one of three women. The first gets taken by another guy. The second, although good looking, isn’t nearly so pretty as when she is on the stage. The third is a petite thing with high cheekbones, big eyes and a warm smile.

She tells me she would like to spend the night with me and I believe her. At midnight we get back to the apartment. She’s happy, I’m in a good mood. The sex is warm and friendly, just the way I like it. In the morning, we have a repeat performance. We have another in the afternoon.

She’s not really into it, but she’s very accommodating, almost subservient, but she seems happy enough. I take her out for a late lunch and walk her back to her bar. I’ve already told her I’ll be taking another girl from her bar the next night. She made no comment.

Walking along with her hand in mine, I’m thinking about what kind of girl I should go after that evening. It occurs to me that I’m a bit shagged out and would probably be not much good in bed. A thought suddenly comes to me.

“Ann, would you like to sleep with me tonight? I’m too tired for boom-boom, so just sleep.” She looks up at me with those big eyes, smiles a warm smile and nods. She has to go home and change, so I agree to pick her up at the bar in one hour.

I rent a bike, move my stuff out of the apartment and into the hotel and pick her up at the agreed upon time. “So,” I asked her as she sat down next to me, “what did you do?”

“Took shower” she replied.

Now, even if we discount the two showers we had before we went to sleep, Ann had quite a few showers already that day. Early in the morning, maybe around 6, she got up, took a shower and came back to sleep. When I woke up, we made like bunnies then followed up with a shower and some lounging around. When we finished our afternoon session, we showered again. She went back to her apartment and showered before coming to the club to meet me. That’s four showers before dinner.

Is it any wonder these are the cleanest women in the world?

We stopped at the hotel to drop her stuff, and then went to the mall to see a movie. With time to kill before the show, we checked out the “Believe it or Not” attraction. Frankly, it’s over priced for what you get. However, it’s a time killer. “The Haunted Mansion” was another waste of time. We left the theatre and went back to the bar area to eat.

We sat within a stone’s throw of Boys Town. I have no desire to swing the other way, but it is another world watching Farangs coming to town to pick up other guys. Some of these fellows, you can be sure, are letting their hair down (so to speak) like they can’t back home. I see one guy in his late forties, in good shape but balding, walking around wearing a fancy mesh shirt that would look more at home on a Latino in the disco. A few minutes later, a group of German guys in their early thirty made their way down the street. They were really, really, good looking. Not made up, but sharp and confident, the sort of guys that make the girls go weak in the knees. Fortunately, as I notice a couple of Thai guys in tow, they won’t be satisfying any ladies anytime soon.

It’s at this point I realize that we should all actively encourage homosexuality in men. I mean, think about it. Every gay guy out there is one less guy we have to compete with!

We go back to the hotel and settle in for a nice domestic night. With the aircon turned way down, there’s lots of snuggling from Ann all night long. The next morning, I’m raring to go.

I leave Ann to sleep in while I grab some breakfast. When I return, she’s just waking and I’m in the mood once more! She is very accommodating to my needs. We spend most of the afternoon in bed, an amazing girlfriend experience. I got to know her a lot better, even though her English is quite poor. I half regret sending her away that evening in favor of a stranger, but I already made plans with Kai.

I take Ann back to her apartment around four. At five, I return to the bar to pick up Kai. She looks as cute now as she did a couple of days ago. She’s pleased to see me. She then informs me that she’s still on her period. This is a blessing and a curse.

I send a text message to Ann, “If you want to go with me tonight, come to the bar right now.” She calls me back a minute later, telling me she’s still home and that she’d love to go with me. That night we go to a surprisingly good Thai movie at the Big C mall.

Later, I introduce the concept of balcony sex to her. She’s nervous at first, but then really gets into it. Looking out over the city as she gets nailed from behind turns her on.

After enduring another night of girlfriend sex, I know I have to go. Three nights in a row is becoming a habit. She wants me to stay, naturally, but further adventure waits.

Photos: Little Pet Ann 15 16 17 18 19
Admin: Last photo of set below

Trat and Ko Chang

I took a regular (damn slow) bus to Rayon, Chonbury and Trat in order to make it to Ko Chang. The bus started out OK, but got more and more crowded the further we went. As the hours got later, however, most of the riders had disembarked until there were only a handful of people left.

I moved up to the front of the bus where this girl did her utmost to communicate with me. Panee spoke only a handful of English words, but was so excited to talk to me it didn’t matter. The driver did most of the translation. She was on her way to Issan so there was no sanuking opportunity (even if there didn’t seem to be any already). I could not figure out how old she was. Was she a kid, or a lady on the make with a Farang.

It was midnight by the time I hit Trat. I hauled my butt around trying to find the recommended guesthouse. Ended up in the wrong one and passed out. I later learned that I was only a few hundred meters away from some little beer bars with little Thai ladies available for little money.

Ko Chang was another adventure entirely. I got a minibus to the wharf, but grew rather suspect that every other person on the bus was a Farang. To make maters worse, everyone the boats (coming and going) were Farang. It wasn’t until we were halfway across that I noticed the other boats, regular ferries, coming from a second wharf not far away. If you go to Chang, make sure you get with the locals on the other boats and save some money.

On the other side, there’s no where to rent a moto. It’s just a resto-wait-area with a bunch of tuk tuks waiting to rip off tourists. I learned as the days progressed, that the tuk tuk drivers had the island all sewed up. Although you could rent a bike on the main beaches, you had to pay them to take you there, and take you back. Furthermore, they would not take you where you wanted to go. They only went where they felt like it and if you wanted to go with them, you’d pay for the privilege.

Ko Chang, despite the positive things I’ve read about it, is not terribly interesting. It’s no so well developed, so you won’t find big hotels or much to do other than hang on the beach. By the same token it’s developed well enough that the taxi mafia have managed to do their thing.

After two days of exploring the island, I’d had enough and was ready for Cambodia.

Hombre, can you swap this shot for the last one in the post above, please? That thermastat is driving me nuts.

Photo: Little Pet Ann 20

Damn!!!! I thought the thermostat was the best part of the pic !! LOL

That's some weird fetish you've got, Khun_mor. Myself? I prefer radio dials (tweek, tweek "Hello, Tokyo!" tweek, tweek).

I like to turn the knobs and then check to see if the "water" is warm. You know, "tweak, tweak, check if it's warm. Tweak, tweak, check if it's warm."

E