Let’s get on to the fun stuff of day one. We are ready to hit the town around sunset, and since Bafana’s leg is in serious pain, I decide a visit to the oh so close by Santos street is in order. As soon as we hit the start of the Hole in The Wall Restaurant, I hear a shrill “Monger X” and soon I am tackled in the middle of the street by a crying Lyka from the Luz Bar (sheesh I am the only guy to ever gave out a 500 peso tip.) I really dig the Luz bar, and soon I have them cranking up the karaoke machine and a round of drinks for Bafana, Lyka, and I. We start with the Lyka-MX greatest hits Dust in The Wind, Abracadabra, and Let’s Just Kiss and Say Goodbye and soon everyone at the bar has a migraine. Fuck ‘em I drinking cold San Miguel, getting my unit mauled, playing with titties, all while taking in the vista of the Santos Parade of dysfunctional humanity.

Photo: Lyka Karaoke 01

Meanwhile Bafana has hooked up with a much better looking one that mine (damn where did she come from) and he seems to be enjoying himself immensely with this oh too innocent to be on Santos honey. Shoot less five songs into the our set and Lyka puts on the hard press to go back to the room for some ST. Hmmm, the quick press is a little surprising but the gimpy Bafana is happy with his choice and has decided he wants to take her long time. I was going to suggest that he wait to see the more extensive offerings on Fields Ave. later, but I know Bafana likes to settle in quickly on his first night. So off we go back to the CP hotel. As usual with Lyka she delivers a good BJ, quality fuck, and will take pics. After about 45 minutes round one is over and Lyka is getting dressed and telling me some BS story about having to be somewhere at 8 and that she will make it up to me if I take her LT tomorrow. Lyka has to be the world’s worst liar and I can’t believe this little (now fallen) angel is running on me. If I get someone trying to run, these days I will crack down pretty hard and immediately suggest we go have a talk with mamasan. However, I look at this as free pass to fuck whoever I want at her bar, while before I was branded here. Ah being less myopic than a bar girl pays off again.


Photos: Other Lyka 02 03 04

After Lyka split I called Bafana to let him know I done had me a runner. We had a laugh about it and decided to go get a bite to eat at Sub Delicious around the corner (Bafana’s girl opted to sleep instead of joining us) I know people bitch about the lack of good food in AC. But I love Sub-D. Living in Singapore I eat fantastic Asian food all time, but I never get any good American food (and no English Pub grub doesn’t count.) So getting a Philly cheesesteak, and Italian hoagie, chicken wings or onion rings that is so close to how it is in America is a real treat for me. In AC I eat at SubD almost everyday. At the table next to ours is a set of three super hotties and the Korean guy who has barfined them. Two of the girls in our direct eyesight commence serious flirting while the drunk Korean guy drools on the third one. Eventually the Korean dude goes to the John and I immedieately start the conversation. When I asked them where they worked. With complete yeah we are hot shit attitude “We work at the Jungle” then the other one says “We will see you there.” And the first one Replies “Yeah like tomorrow” after which they high fived each other like they just proved Fermatt’s last theorem. Well they were spunky and hot, I will refer to them as the Jungle girls.

After chowing down way too much greasy food Bafana decided to retreat to the hotel and I was alone to bar hop. I hit a lot of places but don’t remember too many as I started in heavily on the Taduay Rum and Cokes. However, I do know my last stop was Treasure Island. Treasure Island is a closet that calls itself a bar, and in my opinion it can be really fun or really awful. This place always has a group of hideous pushy lesbian trolls, these girls are damn annoying and are all over any customer who comes in the door. I wish management would wake up and see how much business the ugly dike crew drives away.

Photo: TI Lesbo Trolls 05

After a little while I am sitting one of the bench sofas feeling no pain. There is an older big titty (and very fat) waitress who gives a great 30 minute massage while she milks a lady drink. She is working me over pretty well. All of the sudden I am feeling my resolve to continue the hunt waning and decide to take stock of the situation, and I ask the little thing curled up next to me who I have bought a drink for if she is a cherry girl. And of course she is. Next thing I know, grandma waitress does her usual move where she goes from working my thighs to trying to play with my dick and offer to blow me real good back in my room. In my previous visits I show her no stir and politely decline, but all of the sudden my dick responds and starts to grow erect. Grandma already anticipating the usual rebuff has her hands of my dick, when I slur the words, “It’s OK don’t stop.” Whoa I must have made Grandmas year as she immediately pounces my dick and has me hard as a rock in nothing flat. Long story short Grandma, Cherry girl, and I are headed back to the CP. I am sure anyone watching this scene from Kokomo’s would comment “That has disaster written all over it,” as we walked by.

I hate to admit it but this was an absolutely incredible session. After the showers I am laying on my back and grandma breaks out menthol mints, oils, tissues, and god knows what else at the foot of the bed. I get naked cherry girl to start making out with me. Grandma pops a mint and next thing I know Grand Ma is delivering the ice blow job of the century. It ain’t just the shaft she is soaking with the menthol laden saliva, my balls are soaked and numb, and then my ass gets a numbing soaking too. I mean grandma was eating some serious ass. Next grandma got cherry girl down below the waist and starts to give her blow job lessons with me as the test dummy. Unfortunately, the sight of grandma doesn’t really help me maintain a good posture. So I pull cherry girl up and put her on her back and I start to make out with her, I start working my kisses down her body with a prolonged stop at the nipples and eventually and I am into so serious muff diving. During this Grandma continues the shock and awe on my ass, balls and shaft. She even lubes up a digit and gives me a prostrate massage while scooting under to blow me! Grandma is an animal.

Eventually cherry girl starts to get into it as her pussy gets wet and she start to rock and tumble. From behind Grandma, guides me to start climbing back up on Cherry girl soon I am face-to-face making out with cherry girl and grandma gives me a go ahead shove on my ass as she gets up and quietly retreats to the comfort room. Shit Grandma wants me to take the cherry. So I start to tease the CG’s pussy lips and clit with the head of my cock. She starts to pull me in and then at the last minute says “no no. I can’t do this” Hey I am cool with this and lie down next to her and start making out again. On cue Grandma emerges from the CR. I lay on my back and pull CG across my chest, play with her tits, and make out with her all in an effort to shield my eyes from Grandma working her magic.

Grandma is giving me a great BJ. But while in the CR grandma must have cleaned out the cobwebs, because all of the sudden I feel grandma impale herself on me. Holy crap she squat me 100 mph and it feels awesome. Then all of the sudden I feel a dramatic change in sensation, and I quickly realize, “Holy Shit I am in Grandma’s Ass!” Grandma is riding me for all its worth and I am doing everything in my power to keep cherry girl in my eyesight and shield me from the sight I don’t want to see. What my eyes don’t see the pecker doesn’t know. All I can say is that grandma seem to do a never ending cycle of PTATM until I exploded god knows where. I was utterly and completely drained. Nothing could have made me feel better at that moment. But wait Grandma rolled me over and she gave me a great one hour body massage which for most of time was four hands as grandma was teaching cherry girl how to give a good massage.

Even though it was a ST (about 2.5-3 hours) I was really inspired to give these two a tip (yeah yeah I am generous when I am drunk.) The only problem was I only had Sing dollars and they wouldn’t change them at the hotel. So I actually marched out in public again with these two, and of course at the ungodly hour the only open money changer was the last one on Fields by the checkpoint. Of course I made a bad handling funny money drunken mistake. I had intended to give each girl a 300 pesos tip. The next morning I realized I had given one of them a 1200 pesos tip where I had mistaken a 1000 peso note for a 100 peso note. Oooops, but there’s no sense letting a less than 20 dollar mistake ruin my mood. However, I did cringe a bit when I saw the pics the next morning, for all the hot cherry girls in AC I did not pick one of them and Grand ma was atrocious. Hey I gotta give full disclosure here, but I promise the girls will get better looking. Sorry If you are temporarily blinded.

Photos: GrandMa 06 07

Photos: Cherry Girl 08 09

Ok OK, I believe you now....you do fuck ugly broads but not in your home turf(Indonesia/Singapore). This story was absolutely hilarious. Great writing as usual.

Question about Lyka. Did you pay the 500 piso short time for her or full barfine. If you just paid 500 then its ST but if you paid the 1,000 and she bailed well then that's quite different, especially from a Santos girl. You have the same philosophy as myself with runners and ST girls....as soon as they pull a runner, all bets are off and you can fuck any other girl in the bar and she is not entitled to play any bullshit games or jealousy. If she ever gets jealous or tries to brand you in the bar, just point to the time she ran and the score is settled. I never realized why I didnt mind short times sometimes and its because it gives you a trump card and freedom to fuck new girls.

Blazers

Lyka's a ST girl - methinks a full 24 hours of her would make you cry from boredom while you cock was falling off...

MX

I know you TOLD me the story, but the pics REALLY made the whole thing FAR to vivid!! When I first panned down to the pics I threw up a little bit, but the CG helped. Of course, you know you could have gone back to her the next day and taken her faux cherry, but that's a story for your upcoming trip, eh?

E

MX - BTW, when showing pics of Lyka at the karaoke machine PLEASE do me the favor of cropping out the rhinos in the background.

E

damn MX you are kidding? That ..... ummmmmmm.... BIG girl is grandma? u let her touch your rod? My dick would of curled and hid up my ass!

Awesome tales from the crypt amigo-- u got the right attitute and personality to make AC a perfect fit for ya! Keep those stories coming (hide the pics if u can tho).... Burp@!

-DM

Yep, I know I deserve all the razzing you can muster for this one. But I think it makes more interesting to report the whole story not just the ESPN highlights. Also, I think I may have dethroned Porker's claim to have fucked the ugliest woman in Asia and paid for the privelage. Sorry Foot Massage granny but you had a good run.

Lyka was a 500 pesos ST, but from Santos this is supposed to be for two hours.

Epi, I think the Rhino in the background is an 11 year old Rhino in training, (I guess I am not the only one who buys ice cream for the house.) Obviously she is not on the programme but just another element that is the surrealism of Santos.

And I do promise that the pics get much better - how could they not. But it isn't until day three that I will get some pics up that will get you run for your bottle of Jherkins.

These are very nice photoes and add an sense of reality to the story. Thanks!

Are you being sarcastic??? Those girls, besides granny, are cute.

M,

Great report and you certainly made the most of the being there.

And CG is not beautiful, but certainly is cute - what I would call an "ayam kampong" (Indonesian for village chicken) which surely will be delicious to pop!

Any1 likes ayam kampong here?



C.


p.s. did u have a nice weekend?

(Message edited by crazier on November 21, 2004)

"I think I may have dethroned Porker's claim to have fucked the ugliest woman in Asia and paid for the privelage. Sorry Foot Massage granny but you had a good run."

Next time we're in Pattaya I'll run you past FMG and let YOU be the judge. Yours does have MORE then her fair share of ugly, but NO ONE beats Porker's FMG. Honestly, it'll scare the Cialis right outta your pores!!

E

Crazier,
All the girls in AC are pretty much "ayam kampong," Every girl in AC is from the country (some fresher than others) or as they say here from the provinces. For an Ayam Kampong lover like yourself there are tons of fresh off the bus girls, but I am not as sure that you will like the looks of them.

Mx,

In my quests for the ultimate "ayam kampong" (village lass) with, the help of JW (Johnny Walker) and / or beer, there have been times when I have awoken and wanted to kill myself for doing what I did when I look beyond my left or right arm and see what I have attached to there!

Luckily, my lack of a camera under those circumstances made sure that I did not keep images of those for eternity.

There was once a girl from the Ice Pub !

Yes, you know the place but that night, she 'sneaked' on me at the Steps, and since it was the last New Year, I was horribly stoned out of my mind!
'puke'

C.

Crazier, contrary to reports there are lots of cute women running around AC. However, each of the cuties seems to have two or three ugly cousins. May main concern was that the cute girls still have a very Philippine look to them. If that look does nothing for you, well you won't be happy. However I have been very pic happy this trip and should have some specimems for your evaluation upon my return. Oh and don't let the Orchard Tower, Duxton Road, and Paramount Philippinas crowd be a indicator of the AC quality standard. The ones in AC are younger, less hardcore, and much much better looking. I can't believe anyone bangs those ones who make it to Singapore.

MX how's it going down there? Come up for air once in a while and try to post some teaser pics !!

"In my quests for the ultimate "ayam kampong" (village lass) with, the help of JW (Johnny Walker) and / or beer, there have been times when I have awoken and wanted to kill myself for doing what I did when I look beyond my left or right arm and see what I have attached to there!"

I must admit I once tried to chew off my arm to escape an "attitude" decision I made the night before. I WISH I had the excuse "I was drunk"!!

And yes, some pics end up "lost"...

E

DM, since it is Thanksgiving and the start of the Christmas season here are NINE teaser photos. From my first three days.

A cutie (or should I say THE cutie) from TomCats

Photo: Tomcats 13

Spent a lot of time in the Blue Fox the past two nights. Here is Angel who I am waiting for her Aunt Flo to leave town

Photo: Angel BF 14

Here she is doing a body shot off Lani. Lani is a member of the pair I have bar fined the last two nights

Photo: Lani/Angel Body Shot 15

Joanne is the other member of the barfine pair

Photo: Joanne 16

This was my best threesome ever. But given my past lousy luck with threesomes this isn't saying much.

Photos: Joanne/Lani 17 18

Wow, you made MY Thanksgiving with those pics! Well, that and Manning's 6 TD passes...

Wouldn't you LOVE to have the Pringles franchise in AC?

FCK Manning-- every week there's someone mucking up my fantasy team.


MX-- THANKS for the pics. U got some awesome action pics!!! Your tomcat gal is definetely a cutie ;)

Grandma is giving me a great BJ. But while in the CR grandma must have cleaned out the cobwebs, because all of the sudden I feel grandma impale herself on me. Holy crap she squat me 100 mph and it feels awesome. Then all of the sudden I feel a dramatic change in sensation, and I quickly realize, “Holy Shit I am in Grandma’s Ass!” Grandma is riding me for all its worth
Mongerx welcum to NastyWorld..... LOL
Damn... i had to give granny's pic a 9 just for her effort... in two years i have not read a report that got me Hard.... NEXT TRIP TO AC I WILL FIND GRANDMMA !!! every now and then you need to get as Ass Nasty as you possibly can and you did.
Just wish i could have seen the faces of guys as you walked your prom Queens to your room (LOL)
When i grow up i wanna be just like you!
Nasty....

I now see why so many fuckers move heaven and earth to get back to the PI. Yikes.

Me with a pocket full of change and a belly full of beer, well, I might just be "flirting with disaster" myself...Great stuff

That ass licking, ass giving grandma Mx posted pics of wasn't THAT bad -- certainly not as ugly as Pattaya Foot Massage Grandma(tm). But Foot Massage Granny had inSANE tits -- the heaviest tits I have ever felt in my LIFE, and like Mx's filipina grandma, made sparks fly out of my nether regions like a girl half her age never could.

Personally, however, I'd have to say Vicky and the chubby freelancer I got at the Nana restaurant last December were uglier than both Mx's granny and foot massage granny comBINED! THEM was some UGLY CHICKS! In the words of Mark Grace, the ultimate 'slump busters'!

More power to you Ho's-- less competition for the pretty ones for me!

Ah... Angel. When I took her "paired up" with another girl they were blasting their way out the door the next morning at 8am. Of course, she'd only been working bar for less then 2 weeks so she wasn't 100% up on barfine etiquette.

MX

Do I recognize some "ferry terminal lingerie"...?

Looks like you're indeed having a GREAT time!! I've not shot any real "pink" shots here in Batam, but still having a good time. Hope we can compare pics soon.

E

Angel is really up my alley too - tell her she does not need all that make up and she will be even more appealing!

Ayam kampongs as they should be, with their natural skin and beauty shining through!

I have a shot of one girl (Dewi) but, with clothes on - I am sure you will lust for her, in Batam this last weekend.

Unfortunately, Epi was not able to persuade her that Bule(s) are not always big down there!

Ghenggis did her twice in an hour forgoing Pacific; I did her early in the morning after two shots the night before with Winda & one real factory lass I met in Pacific and, Ghenggis went again after me! (that's saying something for her!)And she was as good that 3rd round as qst so says Ghenggis!

She was one hyper sweet f**k that I will want to repeat again! Glad you shared.

Well, with Jetstar flying to Manila, I might be persuaded after CNY but my friend, there's Vietnam, Cambodia, Laos, some parts of China, More of backwater Indonesia .........

Do you want to leave Asia one day and not sampled the huge variety all over the place?

Theres also much of Thailand outside Pattaya and Bangkok.

Granted that its not as convenient, but, theres fun in the hunt in the kampongs too!