Well we all have to start somewhere ! " The Hobby "

Me ( a repressed Brit now living in Ireland ) It nearly started in in 2000 on a business trip to BKK with a colleague (early 30's recently married still in love/lust) stayed 4 nights at Landmark went to Patpong twice he refused to enter any establishment with dancing girls/sexual opportunities. Me not brave enough to go it alone. Returned to UK and everybody asks did you go to the girly bars "no never did" was my reply, everybody responds "liar" "your too embarassed to admit it "

>>> Fast forward 2001 I began my "mongering appenticeship" in BKK. It was partly thanks to a group of Aussie guys who gave me a new perspective on my then newly found hobby.

I was on Holiday in BKK with a group of friends who were all ex work mates who decided to re-unite & relive our business " Glory Days " ( a classic song, thank you Bruce ) over 8 days in BKK. 4 of us jokers in this pack, 1 married, 1 living together, 1 recently single and Me moving to a new job/country looking for a nice holiday B4 relocating. I have lived with a couple of girls in UK but never married, Whoa ! did that ever save me money.(never got engagement ring back though)

Picture the scene: (in the movie version I will be played by either Adam Sandler, Sting or Beyonce)
In Patpong At 10.30pm my group were sitting in a non girlie bar (all green wrought iron with resident Thai band, just opposite Camelot or come-a-lot to it's friends) my group had no intention of going to any of the bars so prevelant in Patpong ie. full of lovely girls & endless sexual adventures.
Why the hell go all the way to BKK, Patpong, "drink" "Girls" "Feck" (tanks farther Jack) and not participate or even take a look !
(us Brits so F#~*ed up) Me, I was moving to another country on my return, even if I had made the Tabloid newspapers back home (front page headline reads) ENGLISHMAN HAS SEX IN LOS full story and pictures of naked arse on pages 3, 4 5 and 7 A BIG ARSE STORY. Even if was a Paparazzi poster boy I would be able to avoid the shame by migrating which was soon to take place.

So on to the fatefull/life changing meeting with the wizards of Oz. I was sober, only 3 or 4 beers on me but I was determined to take a look at the dancing girls. I tried to persuade my group to visit a girlie bar a few doors up the street but ended out checking it out alone ( my first time ever ) while my friends stayed put.
I was pleasantly suprised to see Men and Women enjoying the good service dancing/atmosphere and so many lovely girls.
I quickly learned my 1st lesson which I called " don't stare unless you care" with my eyes out on stalks at some of the tremendous "booty" ( what a great word, Thank U Snoop, USA, etc ) I soon found myself jammed between a couple of lovely ladeez, still nervous though " Be gentle its my first time" and when one rubbed her hand up my inner thigh I nearly eneded up on the stage when i jumped up with surprise. OK OK so I bought the girls a drink after the usual chatter, "where you from" "You have kind eyes" ( don't get flattered it means u r Ugly with no other redeeming features ) " whats that bulge in your trousers" " its my wallet" " Oh ! me show you good time"
Very surprised drinks were so cheap and with all this information left the girls ( in floods of tears, hell of a bulge that wallet) and went back to my 3 friends in normal bar.
Only gone 15 minutes and 2 had returned to hotel only recently single guy remained, he was also ready to go as his back was hurting from recent sports injury, WHAT ! I gave my friend the exciting details of the past 15 mins and all he was concerned about was the pain releif medication back in his room.
WHAT about MY pain ( the one between my legs ! note to self, your to old to wear tight jeans and get a smaller wallet ) WHAT about my relief hand or any other, I had come this far and was not going back ( this mongers not for turning )

Friend (ex) is in taxi, me back in bar new beer in hand and whoo new girls up dancing, still a bit nervous though. Then the cavalry arrived, a burst of energy through the door, manly cheers, girly squeals of delight, a call for "more beer" and "how u doin" (yes friend and Joey were even popular in Oz back in 01)
Joined by 4 great guys from Sydney who were young and handsome ( in a Butch, non gay way ) and I assumed would not have to pick up girls in this environment for a good few years yet.
Got to talking and they explained the logical/financial/emoitional reasons why men and such places exsist and for young guys ( mid 20's) they were "Bang On" (as we say in Dublin)

Back in the REAL WORLD is where we conform to the standards laid out/dictated by our jobs/professions, friends/partners, geography, financial situation, religous and social pressure's we would engage in that quaint ritual of courtship.
(by the way the Aussies made these points in a much more base and masculine language, but as a Brit living in the land of poets and James joyce I tend to go on a bit, kissed that blarney stone, so I did. why use one word when twenty will do ! )
Back to courtship, you go out on a Saturday night. pre arrange date or pick up a girl in a bar. (pre arrange is LT pick up is ST)
You have dinner may'be lots of drinks, dancing,
a movie. If its a first date the tension increases at the same rate as your credit card as
you strive to impress, always at the back of your mind ( and the front of your pants) will I get anything at the end of these romantic gestures ???
a chaste kiss on the cheek, lips, lips and tongue, quick feel, you feel, your felt, quickie, slowy, sixty nine, double header,
leather, PVC, lingerie, stay ups, stay downs,
late for work on Monday "lost keys to handcuffs boss"
short engagement, elope !

The fact is you really don't know, can you read a girl's/woman's mind I think not.
We do know that just a small thing, anything
a comment/look/farting in the taxi will suddenly change that horny honey who was giving you the green light all night into a can't won't don't woman. Its back to square ONE another date or another girl, sexual tension ruins your working day/week and we start the procedure all over again, we've all been there, right.

But in the UNREAL WORLD of BKK other similar locations its reversed and stood on its head !
YOU KNOW that if YOU DECIDE there will be sex/lovemaking/fantasy/exctasy/kissing/cuddling
at the end of your date/liason/business transaction.
The sexual pressure and uncertainty is a vast weight lifted from you and I (me personally) can really enjoy myself and be myself, rather than present a persona that I hope will impress her enough to " get me some" (still avoid farting in taxi though)
Yes you spend money, have dinner, go dancing, buy gifts but YOU DECIDE and the fact you do so even though "the cats in the bag" makes it a impressive and genuine gesture ( or you want to do something really kinky )
When Im in BKK I treat women the same as at home
Always go for Lunch/Dinner/ dancing/clothes/lingerie shopping.
This is me also reliving my youth, but it makes me very happy and most probably the lady with me also happy (I hope so)
My friend with the bad back at the begining of my story told me the next day over lunch " I was sad" for going to such places, his moral high ground needed oxygene and a sherpa guide to be reached.
With a little encouragement from my new Aussie friends I had met a gorgeous girl and gone to a hotel ( "Ho" tel ) I was still a bit nervous, like a virgin on Prom night, but she was helpful and lovely and we did what comes naturally (but sadly not together, except for the 9th time ! OK so I lied)
I also went back following night ( whaddya want a mongering medal ) I did not feel bad I was'nt cheating on anyone, I took precautions, locked the door, checked the wardrobe for newspaper reporters, had me condoms handy, had great sex (well for me anyway) I left about 5 while she was sleeping, she had good english and would have liked the other kind of oral experience but was still trying to "work things out" in my head (obviously had done so by that evening)
but as I lay on my bed back at the Landmark I
had a big smile on my face which was still there when my friend told me I was sad.

Ironically the following year my "your sad" friend visited Singapore, on his return after a few drinks he told me that he know understand why
I gave praise and had a preference for Asian girls. He revealed that in Singapore that he had
had slept with a young lady who was out of work tour guide ! he bought her meals/gifts but "she was not a working girl"

Guess you can be glad to be sad.

Thanks again Aussies,
you rock you rule and your nobodys fool.

(I'm a first time caller, hope you enjoyed this)

"Do you remember the 1st time" ( lyric from Jarvis Cocker & Pulp )


Can you still remember or are you to burned to care ?

Did you do it whilst drunk or did it just for a Dare,

Was she beer Goggles pretty or a face from the past,

was it over too quickly or did it "Just" last,

To that moment of exctasy when everythings clear,

Write it down and tell us, we cant wait to hear.


( Jarvis eat your heart out) denny27

Finally some pictures from 2004
looking forward to meeting dave the rave in May
thanx for E mails & pics Dave "it pays to advertise mate" hurray for Hollywood

Photos: 2004 Thailand 01 04

Nice pics and interesting discussion!

Denny27,

It was nice to meet you and Dave the Rave the other night. You are the first two mongers from teh Club that I ever met....hope to meet more of the guys. Thanks for the drink, the good converstation, and stories...

I am in Thailand so can't see the pic, but will certainly check them out once back in Canada next week. Interesting reading....obviously written from someone who truly enjoyed the first and subsequent experiences....

All the best to you
fdr

Thanks for the candid report. The details were poetic. It does seem like an unreal world when you are back home and reflect on the fantasy that you just lived. I noticed you went with Poppy, I loved your shot of her in the bathtub. Heres a pic of her you might like.

Photo: Poppy

Thanks for Photo Bahtman. Poppy ! Lovely girl. Thanks to Dave El Rave's sage advice I met her a few times and she had a new look/style of hair, make up, dress every time we met. also very photogenic and IMHO V.beautiful inside and out. left me a very nice letter (in english) after a visit, which was a first for me ( sounds like I never received a letter in my life, but you know what I mean) . Maybe it was the large amount I gave her on her Birthday (prev. post) But will convince myself it was in appreciation for a fun time spent together. She has a scar on her right cheek (and on right hip) which she seems to
have hidden with make-up on your pic or was it not there when you took photo ? I met her early May and it is visible in bath photo. also notice same tummy piercing in the bath shots and on some photo's I took during earlier meetings, so don't imagine your pic is very old. I have Nikon digital camera which I bought in a sale at one of the London airport duty free shops for about £300/$600 last year and tend to take 2 or 3 quick photo's in same setting with the hope of getting a good one.
It also helps if the subject is happy to participate, as I said on a recent post a grudge photo is nearly as bad as a grudge F*%K !
I don't think I will ever be able to reach your standard of picture but its great to have some reminder of fun times. Finally on Poppy topic I will always remember walking into the Foxhunter Pub for Dinner with her about 10 ish one evening and 3 euro/farang were exiting the raised dining area where we were being seated, Poppy looked sensational, the look they gave me was priceless
verbally described it was along the lines of " You lucky Bastard" "I hate You" "How could you"

Thanks again for the great pleasure derived from your many fantastic Photo's / works of art.

Will be in touch via your CH inbox.

Chok Dee Khrup (still got it Epi)

PS " Do you remember the first time " I wrote that in April (under the influence of a bottle Merlot) and was the first thing I wrote on CH
so up my own arse (an Irish/english saying)
Since then met some great people in person
Dave D Rave, a godsend to a single traveller in BKK, introduced me to fellow clubbers and lovely lay deez. had a few drinks with fdr1932 ( surely not your DOB) Blumpy who has become a very good friend. even had a quick drink with the legend who is Epi (also the first guy to ever inbox me on CH with advice for my Pattaya trip, thanks again)
And now from April to June things have changed
Daves moved on to greener pastures, Blumpy and myself trip over and looking forward to another trip/adventure in LOS and all our past posts are reminders of whats been and gone! God knows what we will be writing at the years end ?
( no merlot tonight, australian reisling )
must go as Im in danger of disappearing up a small orifice, again!

I have Nikon digital camera which I bought in a sale at one of the London airport duty free shops for about £300/$600 last year and tend to take 2 or 3 quick photo's in same setting with the hope of getting a good one.

Denny

If you had ANY idea how much Bahtman and I have spent on equipment it would give you a heart attack!!

As for taking 2-3 pics at a time I probably take 10-100x the pics you do. Yes, we all apply the same process of trial and error.

You're taking time to record these memories for yourself and then kind enough to share it with the rest of us here on CH. We all really appreciate it...

E

I can imagine that the combined value of yourself and Bahtmans photo equipment would equal the combined GDP of a small African state.

I mentioned the cheapness of my camera to make excuses for the varying quality of my "snaps" .

I did pick up the photographic tip given to Dave the Rave on a recent post, about taking those saucy rear view photo's. it seems VPL without the L is now in fashion. (Dave has some great photo's, like myself I think he is a sucker for a pretty face)

With regards to sharing ?
I have to be honest maybe Im just showing off ?
or its a primeval thing and a long lost relative was a cave painter.
I guess really its all about "tit for tat" (apt phrase) If you expect other CH adventurers to show photo's for general viewing and enjoyment, in the interest of fair play you should also contribute. ( Oh yeah and a bit off showing off might get in the mix ) I do appreciate your appreciation. Have a great weekend all, Glorious weather UK and Ireland.

Lots of recent posts in the theme of "Im a Newbie CH'er" and "I am soon going to LOS for the first time". So I am hoping that there will be lots of "first time adventures" to report (hopefully with pics) But I still think that even those hard nosed mongers can still remember the start of their illustrious mongering careers ? All of us were Thai virgins at one time. So take the time and roll back the years and tell it like it WAS !

Also please note November will see arrival of Blumpy and myself plus others hitting BKK and Pattaya (after spell in Iraq Blumpy ready for a serious GOOD TIME) hope to catch up with old friends and make some new friends. Planning to spend many evenings with the Prince of Bangkok, Dave the Rave in the new look AngelWitch. (a must for any first timers )
Reports tell us the even the toilets are number 1 in Nana, what a usp unique selling point " clean girls and clean toilets"
" the can smells as sweet as our girls" obviously Dave has tuned into the Euro/US hidden
Male obsession about toilets. hoping he is flush with success ! ( hopefully more people than Dave will get my stupid puns ? )

So back to the point, The first time ,Thai lady or Thai trip, post now and share the love (or sex) thanks, D27 (ex sith)

Hey Denny 27, funny post, I hope you know you've

got a book in you, If I may be so bold the

working title will be " Monger Pulp Fiction "

the raw and real story of SEA SEX.

This was my first adventure yesterday, I think it was me that said,

" I love the smell of Pooying in the morning "

Photo: Morning Adventure

What about your book "A couple of tits now " or to use its UK title "I copped a load of clits now"

JK Rowlings look out another story about a young man with a different kind of Magic wand
who casts a spell on young Thai ladies and also
the pictures in your book would be a million times better.

A book inside me ! well I checked, you were right, it was a rolled up copy of the karma sutra.
no wonder I could'nt sit down comfortably !

Hope to see you if your around early November
BKK or Patt.