A little background on me. I live in Puerto Rico, the land of J'LO and Ricky Martin. All my life I have had a bit of a curse, the curse is that on one day of the year I will be guaranteed a miserable time. That day is my birthday. When I was little it would always rain on my birthday, no one would show up and my grandmother died on my birthday.

I tend to get sensitive about that day, I’ve had fights, car accidents, been robbed, etc. It got so bad that I just stopped going out that day. So you can imagine that I wasn’t looking forward to June 1 this year, but as I thought about it I decided to once and for all break the curse.


September of the previous year I had flown to Dominican Republic and had an amazing time. But a quick search of the flights to DR proved that American Eagle are bastard’s, they raised prices from $300 of a one hour trip to $382. Phuck that! I needed a new destination. Rio? No not enough time to save up and that darn language barrier. Thailand? that 17 hour direct flight from JFK to BKK was not something I wanted to experience. Mexico? No its gone to shit. Colombia? No that’s for more experienced Mongers. Cuba? No I don’t know how to get around that pesky embargo. Costa Rica? hmmm let me take a look.

I quickly found CRT and joined up. I was ready to move my next mongering destination to CR. I was quickly greeted by Ruffnuts and I felt welcome. Then things went sour, when I made a joke that resulted in a Vet flaming me. Things quickly got out of hand and I became The Infamous Coqui The Dark CRT Poster. Some of the flak I got I deserved and some I didn’t. It became a snowball effect just getting bigger and bigger.

Through it all I managed to learn allot about Costa Rica and I was contacted by many board members who were just cool people. I contacted my wingman Mr.Ed (who goes by another name in CRT) and we set our tickets for 6 days in Costa Rica.

Through it all I worked very hard and saved every penny I made. I was a cheap skate for months, I took any trip I could get my grubby hands on no matter how bad it was. Finally June 1st rolled around and I entered the plane ready to meet the land of Costa Rica.

I had a connecting flight to Miami for $400 dollars it was truly worth it. My flight left at 7 and would put me in Costa Rica at 12:30 noon. The flight was pretty smooth and uneventful for the fist half. The second half I was seated next to an elderly man who's daughter lives and runs a hotel in Quepos. He told me allot about Costa Rica, whether its true or not I don’t know basically he told me there was no army and their police force stopped working after 5pm.

Soon the plane landed and I set foot on Costarican soil. I had brought carry on baggage only since I always hate checking bags. I flew through immigration and custom (I didn’t even have my bag checked!). As I approached the exit doors I prepared myself for an gauntlet of airport arrival (after visiting the Dominican Rep you become pretty hardened with airports) boy was I in for a shock! No one trying to grab my bag, no one begging me for money, no corrupt officers asking for a bride, quick and efficient airport experience. In less than 5 seconds I was in a cab on my way to El Presidente Hotel.

What can I say of my first impression of Costa Rica? Well first of all unlike what other members had told me it was not a third world country. Anyone who says this is an idiot who has never been to a real third world country. The country side is beautiful and city is very modern it reminds me of back home in the mid 80's to the mid 90's mixed in with today. On the way to the hotel I saw modern cars, billboards for Kamur, Dennys, hotels, stores, etc.

By 1:00 I was entering Hotel Presidente, I gave the driver 2 bucks and checked in to my hotel. The staff was courteous and nice, I got my key and safe key and entered my room. My first impression of my room was that it was small but then I realized that for the price I was paying it was pretty darn sweet, the bathroom was very comfortable with good water pressure and warm water. Still does it have to be a universal law that the label that says Hot Water is really Cold and the one that is Cold Water is really Hot? And I also thought it was amusing that my view from my window was really a stone wall.

I put my extra cash in my safe and I set up my laptop on my desk with my handy new laptop lock. Took a quick shower and proceeded to look for the nearest ATM. So I make a left and take a block up and see an ATM. I pop in my card ask for 10,000 colones and I get...........Nothing. Okay lets try again for 9,000 colones..........nothing. Okay don’t panic. I get my card out and ask the guard what the problem is. He tells me the ATM only takes VISA. He points down the street to another ATM.

I breath a sigh of relief and head to the one down the street, I swipe my card and ask for 50,000 colones. It tells me my transaction has been cancelled. Cue the twilight zone music.....

Okay im freaking out and I need to relax. I head to Zona Blue. With the map I start to find my bearings, I wind up passing in front of a Foreign Affair. Then I finally see the sign of Zona Blue. Its raining lightly and my feet are starting to get soar but it feels good to be doing so much exercise . I have $40 dollars in my pocket and I enter Zona Blue. I flash my VIP card and they waive me through to the waiting room filled with the girls.

The selection that day.............was not that impressive. Maybe it was a weak day or the girls weren’t dressed the best but I just wasn’t going for what I was seeing. Finally I chose

Photo: Samantha 01

FYI this is not what she was wearing that day, she had on this hot little miniskirt and tank top that had me curious. She gave me a nice massage but a covered blow job (sadly not to be my last) but on the plus side I got some good french kissing from her part (sadly to be one of the few). The session was good but I just had my mind on other things namely how the Phuck I was going to get access to my money if my Debit Card didn’t work. Zona Blue was nice but the rooms inside were a little run down in my opinion.

I decided to walk back to the hotel, I specifically chose the route that took me to Del Rey, I had heard on the board that there were ATMS there, I asked the guard he pointed to one by the casino, I tried it and got INVALID PIN NUMBER. Now im freaking out, not to mention horny by all the cleavage that im seeing at Del Rey. I go back to my hotel and call my bank. They tell me that my card is fine. To try again and if that doesn’t work ask for a cash advance.

I head out the door in search of another ATM. I finally find one two blocks from El Presidente in front of a bank with a armed guard. Fist time I see a guard with a shot gun that was a cool sight. I try my card and..........Excelsior!!!! Money!! $$$$$$$ I Haven’t been that happy in a very long time.

I had not had anything to eat since 4:30 in the morning. I looked across the street and saw McDonalds. It was like a light from the heavens shined down and illuminated it for me. I ran in and ordered the mother of all meals, once I payed for it I practically started scarfing it down in front of bewildered employees.

Once I finished eating my orgasmic meal (Do you know what they call a Big Mac in Costa Rica? Me neither I didn’t order one but I did order some nuggets which were cooked flat and had black meat instead of white.) I headed back to the hotel.......Well I tried but I got lost. It was my own fault I thought I had the city in the palm of my hand but the more I walked the more I felt like I was miles away from my destination or going in circles, the people I asked couldn’t give me correct directions finally gave up and hailed a cab a minute later I was back in The Presidente where I went upstairs and took another shower, put on some perfume, organized my money and went walking to Del Rey.

Once I was out the door I heard a familiar "Ey My friend!" it was the little punk from the walk to del rey video on CRT!!! I quickly ignored him and kept walking once I got to the Del Rey I would get guys outside the door offer me cigars or ask me for money to which I replied in a stern and simple NO and they just backed off. These are the famous pestering beggars I read so much about in CRT? man what a joke? Dominican Rep beggars put these guys to shame.

I walked around Del Rey and saw allot of girls on the slot machines or black jack table (sad sight seeing such beautiful ladies wasting their money on rigged games) I turned to the left and I saw the blue marlin. I wasn’t impressed by the size of it. The bartenders were hot but I didn’t feel like pinning over them. Not many of the ladies approached me, which kind of made me a little sad. I saw some guys sitting on a table by the door. I asked if they were CRT and they replied yes and asked my nick.

"Coqui" I answered. I got some "oh so your Coqui" stares. I met Latinoheat which I immediately got along with, very nice guy and Pidd (I think) who was also a nice gentleman. I decided to excuse myself and get something to drink. I went to the bar and asked for a mild drink and looked around. When I saw

Photo: Dang 02

Don’t be fooled by the picture she was at least a 9. She was distant and quiet, I asked her were she was from and she said Colombia (this was not going to be the last time I went through this exchange). Of course she asked for cien, I got her down to 80. I decided I wouldn’t get anything lower so I took it. A covered blow job, peck kisses and some decent sex later it was over. I felt that Dang was good but had allot of sadness in her. She was quiet but deep down I saw a sweetness that wanted to come out. If you ever see her buy her some water and make her laugh im pretty sure she could use a good laugh. I gave her one of my gifts a nice neckless. She smiled quietly and gave me her cell. Sadly I never used it (wouldn’t be the last cell phone number I picked up)

After Dang I headed back to Del Rey. I walked around and around looking at the talent which was very very good. I was actually looking for Panamanian Daisy, I wanted her as my birthday gift. I couldn’t find her. I kept walking around and met up with some more CRT members. Who didn’t know how to react to me, at first they were pretty miffed at me then they kind of let that be water under the bridge. One pointed out Daisy to me and I was off!

Photo: Daisy 03

What can I say about Daisy? Well for one I broke the coveted CRT rule and payed Cien. I figured that it was my birthday and she was worth the breaking of the sacred rule. Boy was I right. She was amazing. I mean I wouldn’t say she was the best I ever had but she was right up there and she is incredibly hot a very strong 9 in my opinion. Of course I got a covered blow job but I did get some nice kissing (no tongue) and a pretty good massage followed by very very very good sex.

I gave Daisy one of the toys for her daughter (a Barbie named Daisy......I shit you not). Plus some glow in the dark massage cream I didn’t think I would need (boy would I regret that).

After Daisy left I kept wondering when Mr. Ed would get to CR. I had forgotten when his flight flew in. So I decided to do a few laps around Del Rey to find him. I kept looking around the talent was good but every girl i went up to kept asking for cien and really didnt feel like hageling plus i know i only have 4 bullets a day so i was saving my last bullet for someone special. I kept bumping into this cute Colombian named Margarita. She offered 80 and wouldn’t budge below. I told her I would think about it and kept walking around.

The talent was great around Del Rey but no other girl would go below cien and the ones that did I just wouldn’t get a good vibe with. I kept hoping I would bump into Mr.Ed so we could take off and check out other venues since Del Rey was pissing me off. But I couldn’t find him finally I gave up and sat down and started to weigh my options. On the one hand I had a sweet chica who offered me 80 but on the other hand I could gamble and try my luck on one of the 10's who were walking around.

I decided I couldn’t respect myself if I broke the cien for an hour rule so I chose

Photos: Margarita 04 05 06

Margarita was supposed to stay with me for an hour but she wound up staying longer because she grew quite fond of me. She was pretty good in bed and very affectionate which is just what I needed. She wanted more bullets out of me but sadly I was all out. But luckily she kept trying Very Happy

When I came up for air, Mr.Ed was pounding on my door, he told me he would talk to me tomorrow. I snuggled with Margarita and soon she had to leave once the clock struck 12. I gave her more than 80 and I made the mistake of leaving my gift bag right in the open and she wanted practically all the gifts, I gave her two but she pouted and had me wrapped around her finger so I wound up giving her one more. She held me down and told me she only wanted me to be faithful to her while I was here. I lied of course and told her I would. She left giving me quick kisses and leaving me with a large smile on my face.

The time change was messing with my internal clock even though it was midnight it felt like 2 in the morning. I decided I had to get some rest. So I took yet another long and warm shower and hit the sack.

Not bad for my birthday of course far from perfect but I think I made a dent in the curse. Cool

End of Part 1.

Like that Daisy chick..thanks for sharing

"He told me allot about Costa Rica, whether its true or not I don’t know basically he told me there was no army and their police force stopped working after 5pm."

Yeh, that about sums it up acurately, LOL