Despite my late night on Friday, I woke up fairly early (about 9) and got ready to start my day. My first stop was the front desk to see how they can possibly call this room a 'suite'.
They're very nice people, so I turned off the Ugly American act and simply asked, "How much is my room?". "Thirty dollars," she promptly replied.
Well, that made sense. I didn't have a suite, and a regular room went for $30. I must have mentioned 'suite' ten times in making the reservation and confirming, and the girl was the one who said $50, but I had an OK room in an OK hotel (with a Banos Turcos) for $30, so who was I to complain? My next question was even easier: "Where's the Banos Turcos?" The answer was equally simple: "Oh, in the other hotel."
OTHER HOTEL??? Now I was more confused. The phone number on the website matched the number on the business card, and when I dialed it, the phone rang at the front desk. The business card (with **this** hotel's address) and the web site mentions the Banos Turcos Spa. I give up - there are just some things I guess that I'm not supposed to understand. All that aside, I would stay at this hotel again. For $30, it's perfectly fine.
My next stop is over to Surquillo to see the woman who is renting me the apartment. She thought I was just going to pay, but I was going to check it out first, then pay.
Even though the apartment is in Surquillo, it is only a five minute walk from Miraflores Central Park and Pizza Alley. The building is nice, and she buzzes me in and I walk up to the third floor.
Clara meets me, lets me in and shows me around. The place has a small kitchen, small living room with a mattress where the couch should go, some nice plants, and a small bedroom with a queen-sized bed and a small cable TV. There was a phone for local calls for me to use. The bathroom was small, too, but everything was there, Clara seemed nice enough, and it was only $120 for the week. I figured that I would give it a try, thinking that even if I hated it, it would take me a couple of nights to figure it out, so the cost really wasn't a factor. I paid her and said that I would be back at about the same time tomorrow.
With my plans to use the Banos Turcos in my hotel out the window, I resorted to plan 'B' and grabbed a taxi to Banos Turcos Relax y Vida.
Banos Turcos Relax y Vida
Carlos Villaran #121
(Frente al Banco Internet Via Expressa)
Santa Catalina - 265-5370
12° 05.366' S, 77° 01.291' W
http://www.geocities.com/relax_y_vida
Relax y Vida is possibly the happiest place on earth, with one small exception. For the low price of only 70 Soles plus a customary 30 Sol tip ($20.90 + $8.96), you get to spend an hour with a cute, girl-next-door looking chica where you get a nice massage, time in your own private steam room, all the kisses and attention you want, usually great head, and you feel like a million bucks when you leave. It's as if these girls were sitting there their whole life waiting for you to come in, so that they can treat you like a king for an hour. The only exception is the no full service rule, which was studiously honored on four of my five previous visits (one girl was a rebel). Despite that, I always have a great time there and recommend the place to everyone.
When I got there at 11:30, I asked the mama-san if the lovely Camilla was working. She told me that she would be in at noon. I said that I would be back, and walked around the neighborhood for a while, returning right on the dot.
Camilla wasn't there yet, but they put me in the waiting room (more like a living room with a bar and a handful of attractive young girls). I had a drink, read the paper, and chatted with the other girls. One even remembered my name from a few months back. This place gets some traffic, so I was pretty impressed.
Finally, they tell me Camilla is here and she is getting ready. Camilla gets me, and we go in to a first floor changing room. This was different. Usually, I get taken upstairs and change in the massage room. Camilla give me a robe and we cross the hall into this room with a huge Jacuzzi and a steam room - no massage table in sight.
One thing that I have learned at Relax y Vida is that they know what they are doing, so I asked no questions and went with the flow. I told Camilla that I was happy to see her again and that I wanted to spend two hours with her. We showered, got in the tub and started making out like the teenager that she was. We went into the sauna, back to the pool, I don't remember it all. I do remember (and always will) watching Camilla take a deep breath and dive under the water to go down on me for as long as her air would hold out. I finally got off, and we jacuzzied, cuddled, kissed and talked for a while, until she was able to rise the dead.
At this point, I explained how much I would appreciate some regular sex. She told me that it wasn't allowed, and changed the subject. When I pointed out that it was certainly allowed at my hotel when she got off from work, she turned down that suggestion as well. We went back into the sauna, where she had me lay down and got on top of me in a 69 position, we went on that way for a while, and I incredibly came a second time in about an hour, For me, that's unbelievable.
I tried one more time to set up something for later, but she stood firm. She did let me get off one quick photo. It's good to know that there are Hurricane fans everywhere.
Photo: Camilla 01
I grabbed a quick $2 lunch on the street (soup, main dish, beverage and dessert), and then took a cab back to the hotel to rest up for the evening. The Hurricanes had a football game against Georgia Tech, and then who knows what would come next.
The nap at the hotel did me good, and by 6:30 I was playing some blackjack while waiting for the 7:30 kickoff. As far as I can tell, there's only one place in Lima that shows American sports with English announcers, and that's the Corner Sports Bar & Grill.
Corner Sports Bar and Grill
Avenida Larco #1207
(2 blocks from LarcoMar)
Miraflores - 242-6429
12° 07.796' S, 77° 01.781' W
This place is your usual sports bar - a dozen TVs, chicken wings, burgers, etc., smack dab in the middle of Peru. You can always get a quick fix of English when you need it (not from the staff). I always at least stick my head in when I walk by, just to see who's playing. They post a schedule of what is being shown outside (and have the list ready the day before), so you can plan your day around it if you need to.
I walk in, sit down, order a soda, flirt with the waitress, and settle in to watch the 'Canes kick some butt. Then disaster kicks in. We can't gain a yard, and look like a high school team. I don't even remember what I ate, and I was hating life. The waitress continued to flirt, and she looked so cute in my 'Canes hat that she let me take a few photos. Despite being pissed off, I realized just how easy it was to meet 'regular' girls here in Lima. It wasn't just the waitress; many girls took more of an interest in me than was necessary on this and other trips. That's something that could be worth investigating, perhaps.
The 'Canes lose. I'm distraught. But not too distraught to give my hat to the waitress, who asked for it. I had plans for it the rest of the week, so I told her that she could have it after next Saturday's game against Virginia. Also, it gave me a chance to flirt again later and see how that goes.
I was too pissed to consider seeing a girl that night. Besides, Camilla left me high and dry in the afternoon, so it wasn't that big a deal. I took out my frustration at the blackjack tables at three different casinos: Miraflores, Hacienda and the Golden Palace in San Isidro. I wasn't at the top of my game, so I cut my losses at each casino and was back at the hotel eating a room service dinner by 2:30 in the morning, and asleep soon thereafter.
La Hacienda Hotel & Casino
Avenida Larco & Avenida 28 de Julio
Miraflores
http://book.bestwestern.com/bestwestern/productInfo.do?propertyCode=76402
12° 07.604' S, 77° 01.766' W
Golden Palace Casino
San Isidro
12° 05.776' S, 77° 01.241' W
http://www.casinolahacienda.com.pe/golden/principal.html