I have spent a lot of time in Mazatlan the past 3 years and have plenty of non-sex tips to share. I think what is written about Mazatlan in Guidebooks is absolutely worthless to the type of person who would be a member of Club Hombre and that is the true raison d'etra of this guide. If you just want updated info on where to get laid, skip to that section. It will be highlighted in big bold letters.
GETTING AROUND
You have two options for getting to town. One is, of course, a taxi. Taxis are a flat rate of $20.00 or 200 pesos. Pay in pesos if you can. The exchange rate is nearly 11 to 1. HSBC has an ATM in the Terminal as you exit, and a branch in El Centro. I highly recommend getting an HSBC account. You can sign up online and they only charge you a 1% fee for foreign currency conversions. Most banks and credit card companies charge you that same 1%, plus an additional 2-3%, which can erode the savings you get from the better exchange rates offered by your cards.
Option number two is a collectivo. These are nicer then they sound. They are modern, well maintained vans. They run to all the high end hotels in the Zona Dorada and then drop off passengers, if any, at a couple of popular hotels in Viejo Mazatlan.
Collectivos are pretty inexpensive at 65 pesos, but the driver will expect a 20 peso tip. You do not need to tip the Taxi drivers. The main drawback to this option is time. This can be extremely slow at times. It is especially slow if you arrive mid-afternoon when traffic is bad. The van can take 7-8 passengers and will not leave until that many people have bought tickets. They usually fill up in a hurry, but on this trip I waited a good twenty five minutes just to get in the van.
Once the van leaves, it's generally a 45 minute ride to the Zona Dorada. Traffic is always horrible in this section of town and depending on how many solo travelers are in the van with you, it might be an hour before everyone is dropped off.
The hotels the collectivo visits can be fairly spread out and frequently involve out of the way driving in poor traffic in between stops. It doesn't take too long if you have a couple of families on board and it only needs to stop at 1 or 2 hotels, but I rarely get that lucky.
There is no collectivo service back to the airport. There really is no option but to pay the 200 pesos. I do have one possible way to get around this, but it's risky and would be very time consuming. I don't want to lead anybody down the wrong path here so I am not going to post it. If you are really interested, send me a message.
Once you are settled in town the best way to get around is by walking or taking the city bus. Bus fares are 5 pesos. It is 8 pesos for the Air conditioned bus going to the Zona Dorada. The drivers can make change. If you pay with a 10 peso coin, hold out your hand to get your change. If you are a gringo, it's assumed you don't know any better and the driver may try to pocket your change.
Buses run every 8-10 minutes and if you are staying near the central market there are probably many choices to where ever you are going. I have never waited more than 3 or 4 minutes to get on a bus. The buses are generally very fast and you can flag them down anytime they pass you. There are no designated bus stops. The major points of interest along a route are written on the window of the bus.
The Alternative to the bus is a pulmenia.
This is something akin to a high end golf cart, made by Volkswagen. They are ubiquitous and generally charge between 30 to 50 pesos to take you anywhere between the Zona Dorada and El Centro. I don't like to haggle with the drivers to get the appropriate fare and I think the machines are potential death traps. I also find the bus can get me there quick enough that it just isn't worth the extra money.
You will need to hire a pulmenia if you expect to find places to monger that aren't already discussed on Club Hombre. Be aware that they will likely take you to places that have been closed for sometime, tell you they didn't know they had shut down, and expect you to pay for the trip. Your best bet is to negotiate with the driver for a flat hourly fee. I would start at 100 pesos for an hour and end at 150. They should jump at that. There are far more pulmenias then fares, except during Carnival.
WHERE TO STAY
You do not want to be in the Zona Dorada, where most of the tourists stay. Inspite of the name, it's really not all that nice. If you have ever been to Venice Beach you have a pretty good idea what it's like. The mongering, with one exception, is all in El Centro. The restaurants here are expensive and mediocre, and the people you meet here will all be fat, middle aged gringos from the midwest, adorned in loud shirts, shorts, and flip-flops. The rest of Mazatlan is a real Mexican city. But you won't see it if you stay here. The only place I will recommend is Joe's Oyster bar, which has reasonably priced beer in a cool open bar right on the beach.
However, You may want to stay in the Zona Dorada if you find a good package deal. Alaska Airlines always seems to be advertising 4-5 day complete packages in conjunction with El Cid for 299-499. If you can score one of those, especially at the lower end of that scale, by all means do it. Airfare alone would cost that much. Otherwise stay in Viejo Mazatlan or El Centro.
I don't have a ton of experience with hotels in Mazatlan as I have always rented long term housing with colleagues to use as weekend getaways. However, I have stayed in a few Here are my recommendations:
1) La Siesta Hotel
This is in Viejo Mazatlan and overlooks the Malecon (a walkway along the beach that runs 3.5 miles from old Mazatlan to the golden zone). It's also just a few blocks from the Plaza Machado, a very nice shady plaza surrounded by pretty good restaurants, restored buildings, and a grand old theatre. It's also a very easy walk to the Central Market, which is in turn a fairly easy walk to the major mongering hot spots.
Prices here in early 2007 were 350-550 pesos. Be sure to negotiate. This was once the grand hotel in Mazatlan, but it’s not much more than a travellodge now. Many rooms have a view, even some of the cheaper ones, and they all have cable with a few English language channels, and I believe HBO. The location is tough to beat. This is not the cheapest hotel in Mazatlan, but I think it might be the best value. Free Wi-Fi. as well. Well, in the lobby anyway. Not sure if you can get a signal in the room or not. If you like to go to bed early, which would be strange for a monger, you will want to go elsewhere as they often have parties and/or live music in the courtyard at night.
2) Hotel Lerma
This hotel is not for everyone. This is for hard core budget travelers. You have two choices here: You can get a room with a dirty little bathroom and shower for 150 pesos a night, or a room without for 90 pesos. Those are the posted rates and are very much negotiable. Don't bother with the bathroom. The plumbing is terrible. The communal toilet and shower are much better.
I am a hardcore backpacker type and the Hotel Lerma is barely acceptable to me. The rooms are clean and the hotel is safe. But the room is unattractive and feels like a prison cell. Even so, for someone on a budget who plans on spending the day sightseeing and laying around on the beach by day, and then hitting the mongering venues at night, it could be a pretty good option. I do not recall the cross streets but it is not far from the central market. There are many hotels in this price range in El Centro, I don't know if this is the best of the bunch or not. This one does have quite a following with gringos though, many of whom live there all winter. I can’t possibly imagine why, given the cost of a long term rental in this section of town, but some do indeed make this home.
3) Hotel Durango Note: THIS IS PROBABLY NOT THE ACTUAL NAME OF THE HOTEL!!!!!
I can’t for the life of me remember the name. I think it’s brand new, I don’t recall seeing it before and I can’t find anything about it on the internet. This is in the Plaza Machado. It is the only hotel actually in the plaza, so you can’t miss it. I toured the hotel and took a brochure, but can’t find it as I type this. It’s a great deal. A single room runs 450-550 pesos, includes a fridge and microwave, Cable TV with HBO, and free Wi-Fi. The hotel isn’t luxurious, but is more attractive then La Siesta. Prices rise by a 100 pesos for an extra person.
If you are willing to pay 300-600 pesos a night you have a ton of options. The hotel market in Mazatlan is over built keeping prices pretty low. That changes for Carnaval, which will start on Jan 31st this year. The rest of the year though finding a decent room in this range isn’t a difficult task. You will be hard pressed to find one at these prices in the Zona Dorada.
LONG TERM RENTALS
If you are looking to stay in Mazatlan for a month or more, or will be coming down often for long weekends, it may be worth while to rent a long term apartment. Prices for a property in Viejo Mazatlan will generally run between $350 – $750 U.S. for a one to three bedroom furnished apartment, roughly comparable to a mid-range US rental. There isn’t always a lot of logic to how these units are priced. I usually take the first acceptable, inexpensive apartment I find. If you are the patient type, and can stand the Hotel Lerma for a while, you can probably do better than I if you hold out and wait for something really nice to become available. If the unit you are offered costs more than $300 and doesn’t have a washer and dryer hold out for a little while longer.
The best place to find an apartment is Happy Hour at Canucks Bar.
The place is packed with ex-pat gringos who come to socialize with fellow countrymen. Many of them own houses with apartments to rent out, or have the 411 on a number of nearby units. I have found all my apartments here and found them quickly. This was my first stop in Mazatlan this year. I only came for a week and was not looking for a long term rental. I figured it wouldn’t hurt to ask if anyone had an apartment they would rent for a week. As it turns out, someone I had met here before was going out of town for a week and was going to have to board her dog. I took her apartment gratis for a week in exchange for babysitting the pooch.
The other place to look if you don’t immediately strike a deal here is the pacific Pearl. It’s a free publication for gringos available in the lobby at La Siesta Hotel just around the corner and down the street from Canucks. In the last edition there was a hotel in the classifieds offering a 3 bedroom apartment, two blocks from the Plaza Machado, for $350. I didn’t look at the unit, but even if it was just barely livable that’s a screaming deal considering the desirable location and the size.
WHERE TO EAT
The great food is what keeps me returning to Mazatlan. I haven’t traveled around mexico extensively enough to really know if the cuisine in Sinaloa is really superior to that of other Mexican regions, but its far better then the food I have eaten in Baja or Puerto Vallarta. I stay away from traditional sit down restaurants for the most part in Mazatlan. Generally, they are of dubious quality and not that much different from eating in the Mexican chain restaurants stateside. This is especially true in the Zona Dorada. For the best foods you have got to eat like a local. Eating like a local means eating at the ubiquitous taco stands and vendor stalls.
The specialty of the Taco stands, and maybe the best thing I have ever put in my mouth, are Chorreadas.
This is a tortilla with fresh cheese on top, grilled until it is hard like toast. It is then layered with chopped carne, a salty, watery and vaguely red sauce of some sort, and some red colored seasoning I can’t identify sprinkled on top. It is served with grilled unions on the side. All taco stands have big bowls of Pico De Gaillo, hot sauce, and watery Guacamole to dress your tacos with. Limes naturally, are available too. Everybody uses all three. All of the vendors must buy the stuff in bulk and they all appear to buy the same brands as the sauces taste identical from cart to cart. I adore the hot sauce.
I am well aware the Chorreada sounds like a very simple concoction, and to prepare, I am sure it is. But the different flavors all work together in such harmony to create a meal of wonderful complexity that would rival the most expensive gourmet dishes at 4 and 5 star restaurants, at a price of 12 -15 pesos a piece. Two make a light but satisfying meal. Three should fill you for the entire evening. Being the hedonist that I am, I will sometimes indulge in 4, or even 5. That normally results in an antacid purchase. Entirely worth it in my view, but consider yourself warned.
Nearly every taco stand will make a Chorreada, as well as it’s virtual, but less tasty and complex twin, the Vampiro. But each cart has just a little different take on it. It’s great fun going from stand to stand trying different versions. That said there are some that are heads and shoulders above the rest. The best ones that I have tried, and are can’t miss if you are going to eat out in Mazatlan are the following:
Raymundo, a very nice man and his family, sets up his stand every evening, around 6pm I am guessing, at the corner of Zaragosa and Victor Uribe. He is never open on Mondays.
Soledad has a nice little cart located at the pharmacy across the street from Hidalgo Square. Hidalgo Square is roughly 3 blocks north of Plaza Machado and maybe 1-2 blocks east. Any local could point you in the right direction if you had problems finding it from the Plaza Machado. Soledad, by a hair, has the better food. She makes all her tortillas from scratch which just makes everything taste a little fresher. She also uses just a tiny bit of beans on her Chorreada, something I have not seen any other vendor do.
Please make sure you visit both of these carts at least once. Be aware that during the day there is a different taco cart making food at this exact location. I can not endorse his food as I have never sampled his wares. In general, the taco stands during the day aren’t all that great. They use lesser quality meat with more gristle and smaller tortillas.
For daytime eating I suggest the Central Market.
There are a couple of stands inside the market. One of which often, but not always, has fresh Chile Rellanos. They cost 30 pesos and are large enough to constitute a complete meal. Do not miss this if you like Chile Rellanos. The east side of the market, on the exterior, has a number of taco stands. I especially like this one for its Birria (Goat) taco:
If you haven’t had Goat before you need not be afraid. It’s not radically different from beef but does have a bit of a gamey flavor. I don’t know if Birria is always stewed, but it is at this particular stand.
In addition to great food at the market, you can’t beat the atmosphere of sitting on a stool eating amongst the insane commotion of the market and the traffic. It’s a distinctly Mexican experience.
I have never gotten sick, or had diarrhea after eating at these places hundreds of times. I have never heard of anyone else getting sick either. However, I do look a cart over for anything glaringly unsanitary before I eat there. I think you are less likely to get sick here then a restaurant. They cook the shit out of all the meat. Just use common sense.
While most of the food in Mazatlan is good, there are a few places you should avoid. Just east from Raymundo’s taco stand, on the corner of Zaragosa and Serdan, is a mystifyingly popular taco cart. While it is not bad per se, it serves food that is merely tasty while other carts across the town are serving up religious experiences. The food at this particular cart just doesn’t taste all that fresh. It would do if nothing else was open nearby.
The place you absolutely must avoid is Rin Rin Pizza. It’s hard to turn around in the city without finding one. I was out and about on a holiday when most of the carts where closed and was left with this as my only option. Next time I would choose hunger. I don’t know what to say about this place other than they put a pink mayonnaise sauce on a pepperoni pizza. I am getting nauseous just thinking about it.
The other food to avoid is hot dogs. Doesn’t matter who is cooking the hot dogs, they are just profoundly different from what we eat here in the states. They look beautiful, they are colored bright red and look like fancy sausage, but they taste just like hot dog with a terrible soft and squishy texture. Mexicans often eat then by cutting them up into pieces and smothering them with hot sauce. This intrigued me when I saw it, don’t let it do the same for you! Thank me for my intellectual curiosity saving you from yours when you bypass them. This is the closest thing I have ever seen to a literal enactment of putting lipstick on a pig.
WHERE TO GET LAID
Tarrandas Bar
This place has been pretty well covered on Club Hombre, but I have a few things to add:
First, don’t bother going before 10:00pm. I think it opens at 9:00pm. I arrived at 9:30 and just sat drinking alone for a half hour. At the most there were maybe 5 other patrons in the club until some chicas showed up to danceat 10:00. By 11:00, the place was near capacity and there were 12-15 girls dancing. Most were in the 5-6 range. Doable, but nothing to get overly excited about. There was a couple of girs I would rate a 2, and two girls that I would rate a 7. The dancers don’t make any tips by dancing, the dancers make them from “table dances.”
A table dance lasts for 1 song and costs 45 pesos. You get a lot for 45 pesos. You can touch and caress pretty much any part of the dancers body. The guy sitting at the table in front of mine alternated between sucking on his dancers nipples, to fingering her. Not all the chicas were quite that free with their bodies, but not one was so conservative that she would have avoided jail had the police raided a club like this Stateside. The two hottest girls never danced at all, they had clients lined up for dances and privados from the get go.
Privados, according to my English speaking waiter, were 200 pesos plus whatever I negotiated with the dancer for sex. According to reports here, chicas are asking 300 pesos for sex. I am unable to verify that. I did have a good view of the privado area from my seat though, and timed several people coming in and out. The average time in a privado was about 15 minutes.
The total cost of sex seemed pretty steep to me for 15 minutes in a booth, so I passed on the idea of getting laid here. I debated paying 200 pesos and getting the privado, and nothing more, just to see what one could expect for 20 bucks. I really wasn’t turned on by any of the dancers though and decided to save my money for another day.
The clientele here is almost exclusively Mexican, but they seem pretty gringo friendly. I didn’t raise any eyebrows from the staff of the clientele by being there, and my waiter spoke a little English. There is also a sign on the wall, in English, that says American dollars are accepted and exchanged at a rate of 10 to 1. The bar is located on a safe and surprisingly nice residential street. There is no reason to be nervous about coming here.
I sat at the back of the club as I was trying to watch everyone and get the feel of how things worked here. Don’t do this. Sit at the front. Get as close to the stage as you can get. Dancers dance in 3 song sets. They keep the clothes on for the first two songs and take it all off for the third. As soon as they start taking clothes off the lights suddenly dim. If you are not close to the stage you will not be able to make out very much. You will only vaguely see the naughty bits. You will not be able to tell if she is sporting massive amounts of cellulite, for example, from a distance.
Beers are 18 pesos for Pacifico. Beer prices are listed on a poster on the wall. The poster is rather confusing as it says Pacifico Medias are 18 pesos. I took that to mean the little tiny 6 once bottles of Pacifico you will see around town. Consequently, I paid 30 pesos for Negra Modelo and thought I was being smart and saving a few pesos by ordering a full sized bottle. However, I didn’t see anyone with a tiny bottle of beer. I think media is what they call the normal sized bottles of pacifico, as opposed to the 1 liter ballenas that are so popular around town. Waiters will ask you every 15 minutes or so if you want another beer, but will not hassle you if you decline.
Overall, I would say coming here is a pleasant diversion and a hassle free place to spend a few hours. I didn’t feel compelled to monger here, but will always check it out on future Mazatlan visits. I was there on a Monday night following a Mexican holiday so I may not have seen the A list.
La Botana
I was here about 3 years ago on my first visit to Mazatlan. I stayed a whopping 10 minutes. I decided to give it another shot this time around even though they wanted a 40 peso cover. Once I got in the bar, I couldn’t imagine what my objection to the place was the first time around. The girls, roughly 20 of them, were gorgeous! The spinner on stage as I entered was roughly 25, very light skinned, and looked a lot like a young Catherine Zeta Jones. She was the closest thing I have seen to a 10 in Mexico. The drop off after she left the stage was dramatic, but every single dancer that followed was at least a 7, most I would rate an 8. The worst looking two girls in the club were easily sixes.
It took about 3 hours to see the entire line up. After the dancers starting repeating their sets I decided to find my Zeta Jones look alike and ask for a privado. Before I had a chance to move, one of the girls I rated a six jumped on my lap and started rubbing my crotch. “Would you like a private dance? Only 20 dollars!” I told her in all honestly, maybe later. She said she would show me a real good time. I asked, “How good?” She said she would give me a “blow yob,” for $100.00. I just about gagged on my beer. I told her I would consider it for $50.00. She gave me a vaguely stern look and said “No, the price is $100 Dollars. If too much money, I give you lap dance for $20.” I asked how long the lap dance would last and she said 1 song. I sent her away, finished my beer and left. I think I discovered why I hated this place the first time around.
La Botana is on the northern end of the Malecon. It’s not quite in the Zona Dorada, but it is close. The clientele is at least half gringo here, which at least partly explains the crazy prices. I suspect also that the club takes half of the money which is why the girls won’t negotiate.
My guess is that you could take a girl out of the club at the end of her shift for considerably less money then you would pay for 5-10 minutes of sex in the privado. In spite of a good, and largely gringo crowd, I saw only 1 girl take a customer to a private room. Not too many people biting at the insane prices. I suspect they would eagerly agree to meet you at another time away from work if the price is right. I didn’t attempt this partly because I don’t have enough language skills to negotiate this, most of the girls here didn’t speak any English beyond a couple of words. More importantly, I didn’t think bringing a hooker back to my middle class neighborhood, in the apartment I was loaned for a week, was a terribly smart idea. I would be shocked however, if it couldn’t be done. It would be worth paying a premium price for most of the girls here, but not $100-200 for 5 -10 minutes in a closet in the back of the club.
La Fonda
After striking out at La Botana I was ready to get laid. Stupidly, I decided to walk all the way to La Fonda in El Centro to save 3-4 dollars in cab fare. In my more or less inebriated state this took a little over an hour, and my urges had largely subsided by the time I arrived.
La Fonda is a brothel Pure and simple. It is located at the corner of Najara and Juan Carrasco. There is a Cantina called Bar La Fonda on the bottom of the building, and the maroon colored top half of the building houses the brothel. There is no way to get to the brothel from the bar. Walk to the south side of the building and there will be a gentleman with a large night stick sitting in a plastic chair behind a gate. Tell him you want to go upstairs and he will open the gate and let you walk up. If there is nobody there just wait a minute, he will be down shortly. As you make your way upstairs he buzzes you in with a button attached from the wall. The noise alerts the girls upstairs to an arriving customer and they rush out to be ready for the line up by the time you reach the top.
There were 8 girls or so in the lineup when I arrived at 1:40 am. Most of the girls looked very young, 18-22 if I had to guess. I am not always the best judge of such things, however. Most didn’t look real happy to see a customer. Five of them didn’t even look at me and stared at the ground. The other 3 smiled and made eye contact. I chose the prettiest one who smiled, (not a very high bar really), and off we went.
The cost was 700 pesos and the madam demanded payment upfront. The session was average, about all I could reasonably expect given my alcohol induced clumsiness and lack of language skills. The setup wasn’t exactly conducive to GFE anyway. The brothel is too small, there is no place to really sit down and make small talk with your chica. It’s expected you will make a decision right away, and once you make your selection, everyone sits down on the couch and starts watching the TV blasting pornography at a billion decibles. I don’t like to waist a lot of time with chit chat and the like. I am definitely not the kind of monger who wants to have several drinks with a chica before doing the deed, but this was just too impersonal for me.
I felt a little guilty after leaving the place, this truly seemed like a miserable existence and I felt sorry for the girls who were working in this depressing environment. The sight of six childlike girls curled up into a ball on the couch, covered in blankets, blankly staring at a hardcore pornographic movie as I made my way out the door, made me sick to my stomach. I decided I was done seeking out the casas on this trip.
Bar Los Tolucos
This is not a hooker bar or a table dance club. It’s a run of the mill cantina on Zaragosa, a block east of the park. I poked my head in the door one evening and saw 3 very tall, athletic looking Morenas sitting at table looking bored. The bar was otherwise basically empty; just a couple of Mexicans eating a taco and sipping on a Pacifico. If what they say about Mexican cantina’s is true, that any lady hanging out in one is either a prostitute, or doesn’t care if people think she is, this might be a good place to check out for an adventurous soul with good Spanish language skills. That person is most definitely not me. I don’t have any idea what the protocol is for picking up a whore in a Mexican cantina is, just thought I would throw this out there for anyone who might like to try.
Club Noctourno
This is not the name of the club, I failed to catch the clubs name. This is what all the table dance clubs seem to have emblazoned on the side of their buildings. I wasn’t aware of any beyond Tarrandas and La Botana. I saw this one on my taxi ride back to the airport. It is a yellowish color and is located on the very last block of Najara. It’s a big building and you can’t miss it. I don’t know if it is even open anymore, but if not, the paint job is still perfectly intact.
OTHER THINGS TO DO:
Hike to the lighthouse. Great view of the entire city from the top. Beware that there is a sewage plant right next door and the smell can be awful for the first part of the hike. If it’s really windy, you can sometimes smell it at the top. I still think it’s worth it.
Visit Juarez Market, a large Mexican flea market. The thing goes on for blocks and blocks. Most of the stuff they sell here is complete garbage. It’s just interesting because the place is a complete zoo. Thousands of Mexicans descend on it every Sunday to find cheap appliances and second hand clothing. It fascinating to see how they live and the madness of the crowd is fun. Plenty of food vendors here as well. I bought 10 home made tamales to take home from a lady selling them out of her house for about 30 pesos. When you get tired of all the chaos there is a good sized market to peruse and a several storefronts selling some more junk. It’s about a 15 minute bus ride from the central market.
Go to the beach. The most attractive beaches are on the north side in or around the Zona Dorada. The problem is the number of vendors and time share salesmen who will assault you the moment your foot hits the sand. This can make it hard to relax. You can catch a pulmenia in the Zona Dorada and have him take you to Brew-ha. It’s an open air restaurant on a secluded section of beach where you won’t have to deal with any, or at least not many, vendors hawking junk. They also serve great seafood. Superb jumbo shrimp. They push a platter of jumbo shrimp and a lobster for 160 pesos. The lobster in Mazatlan is awful and doesn’t carry a lot of meat. Buy a meal that is strictly shrimp if you are going to eat here.
Alternately, you can go to Stone Island, south of Old Mazatlan.
The beach there is muddier then up north but the view is fantastic. You can rent a horse or an ATV and explore miles of undeveloped coast line. Be sure to eat at Letty’s restaurant on the beach. She serves an excellent whole fried fish and a very good shrimp quesadilla. Either one will set you back only 60 pesos. There are a few vendors pushing worthless trinkets, but not nearly the number up north. If a vendor comes by with Coconut balls, you must try one. They are almost sickeningly sweet, but delicious.
Go to the Aquarium. It’s very modest but it’s inexpensive and worth seeing for the Sea turtle exhibit. Also included with admission are the bird show and the sea lion show in the adjacent gardens. I have had many masturbatory fantasies about one of the ladies running the bird show.