Upon arrival in porto Alegre we immiediately noticed the higher percentage of blondes here . I by Blondes I mean absolute stunners . Porto Alegre as a city has a higher percentage of middle class citizens living there. Unlike Rio , with it's collections of various predatory street urchins ,you could really feel at ease walking down the streets here . We checked into The Blue Tree towers in Bella Vista . Ann excellant business hotel recommended to us by Bwana Dik . I highly recommend staying here as the rates were quite reasonable . It should be noted though that they have a strict visitor policy . This did not bother us because most of our action would be outside of the hotel .The breakfast here is also quite amazing . After checking in we decided that getting a good meal in our stomachs would be a priority before setting off to explore the termas . Unfortunately for us we found out that most of the restaraunts are closed between 3 and 7:00 pm . Through a highly informed taxi driver we finally found a place to eat and proceeded to pig out . I should take a moment to say that also unlike Rio where you constantly have to check up on your Taxi driver to make sure he isn't taking you for a ride , most of the drivers here are quite honest . When I say "honest" I mean that more than once we had drivers that actually refused tips .When was the last time that happened to you in Rio ? Anyway ,back to the adventure . After filling our stomachs we made an executive decision and proceeded to Sauna Karen D'ache our first terma .I had read quite a lot about this place via Tonyels excellant report on the topic . This would be our first afternoon destination .I have to say this place has a weird set up . Upon entering you feel as if it's a little bit like going to a theme park . There is a parking lot as you enter and to the left of that is the entrance . The place has a wall surrounding it and from what I can see an electrafied fence . I guess thats for customers trying to escape early . There is also this hilarious outdoor mural as you approach the entrance . I wish I had taken a picture of it because if my memories serve me correctly it was a painting of two people fucking on top of a camel !! I'm not kidding ! THe staff working here are very courteous and helpful . As we proceeded to change in the locker room we were giving these sleeveless robes that are reminiscent of The Flintstones . After changing into our cro-magnon outfits we had to pass through a fake cave . Again , I'm not kidding !! This "cave " was narrow and I really feel sorry for anyone who is weight challenged as you could easily get stuck there .After going through the cave you pass through the sauna ( ?!! ) and onward to the bar upstairs .
A live band was playing and I noticed that the bar had a nautical theme going on . Man , I could not stop laughing ! We grabbed a table , ordered drinks and observed the scenery . This place definately had some beauties . I wouldn't say they were stunners but there were some pretty women to be had there .It should be noted that in P.A. Many of the same rules that are prevellant in Rio termas apply here . One important thing to note however is that you have to negotiate price with the girl . This is the rule everywhere . What that means is that you have to have a pretty good command of Portuguese in order to "interview " these girls . It's important to know the bottom line in these places as it differs in each establishment . A small blonde sat down next to me with huge tits and a big smile . As I looked at her tits I thought to myself : no way could these things be real " They were just too big . After going back and forth a little she quickly agreed on a price of R100 and off we went . Big newbie mistake !!! I should have spent more time interviewing her and less time staring at those tits . Upon entering the cabine we took our clothes off and took a shower . I was delighted to see that those huge fun bags were indeed real .WE showered and it went downhill from there . It was as if she was totally inexperienced or something . WE fucked a little but she got kind of freaked out and got up . She then started to tell me some long ass tale about a broken relationship or something . I was pissed ! I got up put my Flintstones robe back on and marched back upstairs . I went back to the bar but everyone else was sessioning so I just sat there steaming away for 20 minutes until Scotch came up from his session . I asked him how things went and he replied that his session was mediocre at best . I grabbed him and marched off to complain about this girl to the management . They were very understanding and explained that it was her first day at the terma . They apologized profusely and then waived my entrance fee . That was cool but I was still pretty burnt . Scotch and I returned to the bar where one by one we were joined by the rest . THe general consensus was that most of the sessions were mediocre except for Tejy . My man Tejy came off in this place with a girl who would do anything he asked . He came back with an ear to ear smile . I hereby crown Tejy "king of Karen D'ache " .Oh before I forget this is the only terma I've ever been to where the guys are sitting around in robes that barely cover and the women are standing around in their street clothes . How backward is that ?
Later on that night we took off for La Barca which was described to us by a Taxi driver to be the hottest place around .Those familiar with Barbarella's in Rio would find that this place is quite similar only larger in scale . Upon entry we were seated at a table and assigned a waiter who we ordered drink from . The waiter informed us that if we were interested in any of the girls he'd bring them over . The women in La Barca are amazing ! There is no exaggeration there . In fact they are so amazing that you don't know where to start . Inside of La Barca there is a large stage where many of the girls change into bikini's to dance and occasionally one will do a strip show . Eager to erase the bad memory of my earlier session I had the waiter bring over a pneumatic brunette . I started to get the interview process going and talked to her a bit about what she liked . Everything seemed to be going smoothly until she asked me to buy her a glass of champagne . I said " no , how about beer ? or something else " she countered with red bull and whiskey . Knowing full well that these are the most expensive drinks I declined and within minutes she left . Most of the others were pretty tired at this point so I was the only one bent on sessioning . I had a couple of guarana's and took in more of the eye candy . Yep. some amazing stunners here .I looked around and noticed that most of the Brazilian guys were drinking a lot ,champagne and all , and playing grab ass ,thats it . I saw another girl with an absolutely amazing ass and had our waiter summon her over . She eagerly came over and sat down with a big smile . We talked a bit and it was the same routine , Champagne or red bull and vodka . Once I said no she left immiediately . Shit ! what was going on ? As a group we decided to take advantage of the free chicken soup being offered upstairs in the dining area . LaBarca's facilities are very modern , clean and top notch . I should also say that we were very pleased with our waiter who we felt looked out for us . I was a little disappointed at my unsuccessful attempts with the ladies in this spot . We were all pretty tired and decided to call it a night and head back to the hotel . My observations on La Barca are as follows : This is a great spot . I would definately go back . The newbie mistake that I made was thinking that I could take my time interviewing the girls . Don't do this . Let them know right away you are interested in sessioning not drinking and go from there . I would bet that you'd do well . None of the Brazilian guys were sessioning ,only drinking and playing grab ass . I'm pretty sure that the girls get a kick back from ordering drinks so thats what they push . Let the girl know you want to session early on in the conversation and you should be fine . I'll be back to La Barca sometime in the future but at that moment it was the end of our first day .
