I'm home from my 12 days in Thailand. I'm totally bummed it's over. Send Prozac.

I'm a 52 year old man living in the Southwest USA. My past mongering was a singular trip last year to Costa Rica. I'm an average looking, on-the-lean side, fit kind of guy with a deaf, right ear. I tend to be a bit of a romantic. I mention these facts since they play a part in some of the particulars of my trip.

God, what a great time I had. I was in Bangkok for the first 3 days of my trip with plans to head to Pattaya for five days and then return to Bangkok for my last two nights. In Bangkok, I stayed at the Grand President on Soi 7.

My first day, during the afternoon, I took the skytrain to Patapong (is that correct? I lost my Groovy Bangkok map.) and wandered in and out of a few bars there. I noticed a tendency for the ladies to approach in pairs. Made it kind of difficult to carry on a conversation with both with one of them inevitably sitting on my deaf ear side. But the friendliness and openess was extremely enjoyable. At the begining of the evening, I headed to some of the beer bars around the hotel and then over to....Ack! what's the name? -- the enclave along Sukumvit that is not Nana Plaza -- anyway, I went to a few places, bought an occasional drink for a lady, and again noticed the tendencies for pairs to approach me. I talked with several lovelies I would have easily been smitten by had I not the wanderlust to keep on moving. So, from there, it was off to Soi Cowboy. Took a walk down the street of go-go's there but did not stop in any. Went to the bar section where I met Be. "Hey, c'mon sit down and talk with me," she said. "Gee," I thought to myself, "Someone who is just asking for a dialogue," and sit down with her I did. She was lean and pretty and spoke decent English and told me for a 400 baht barfine and 1500 baht for her, she would give me a great massage through the night. I never did get that massage unless the pelvic grind qualifies. I spent the next few days until late Thursday evening with her. We went to China Town and some temple I don't know the name of. I fell hopelessly in love with her and asked her to go to Pattaya with me. She declined, and my heart was broken. Thank god, she declined.

I had read in this forum and heard from folks how Pattaya was a mass of bars and go-go's, but I was still not prepared for how big of a mass it was. It was late afternoon-early evening by the time I had showered and settled into my hotel room. The delux rooms at the Sunshine Hotel on Soi 8 are quite nice. I had a balcony overlooking the street, and the noise with the windows closed was not too bad (at least to this half-deaf guy!). I wandered around my first evening, going up and down the various streets, smiling and waving but ultimately declining invitations to sit down. Then, after just leaving Walking Street, I hear a loud chorus of "Hi" and giggles that was absolutely infectious with its gaiety. Turning my head I notice a small bar with a bevy of ladies spilling over the countertop. Time for orange juice (I'm not much of a drinker)! I start playing some dice game with a couple of the hostesses and actually won a few of the games. As a reward for each of my victories, I get a kiss from the one with whom I am feeling most attracted. She's actually not the most attractive -- just the one I feel the best with. Her friend at the bar tells me that if this woman ever wins one of our games, I should barfine her as a prize. It was hilarious watching her face contort into a pout as she lost game after game. Finally, she wins a game, and we walk off hand in hand for a stroll around Walking Street. "How much for your time?" I ask. "Not important," she says with a sweet smile and a cuddle. "Whatever you want." I have been reading a bit lately about the falling-in-love chemical PEA (short for phenylethylamine, I believe) that floods the body when us humans first fall in love. Looking into those eyes of hers, I felt those waves of PEA engulf me. We stopped into a go-go (her idea) and watched a show consisting in part of a lady shooting small darts from a tube in her vagina breaking balloons. Her aim was uncanny. Around midnight, my date and I head to the hotel for a couple of hours of fun before falling asleep in each other's arms. The next morning, I awaken to her nestling intimately with me and we repeat in an abbreviated way the night before. I was rather hurt that she did not ask to stay longer after I gave her 1000 baht, though she seemed quite happy with that amount. Wish I could remember her name...

The next day more wandering. I stopped at a bar in the afternoon just around the corner from Soi 8 and talked briefly with a cutie named Nik. Her English was rather poor, and again she was not the best looking lass there, but I felt comfortable with her. She stopped talking with me after a customer came in whom she obviously knew. I went back to the hotel for a nap and shower and then that evening stopped at Emergency A Go-Go. I am a registered nurse by profession and yeah, I've seen a lot of women in nurses' uniforms, but I'm still a sucker for them. I was greeted at the door by a pretty one who shows me to a seat and then slides in next to me. She's 32 she tells me and feels old. Her English is adequate, and she rubs my crotch with alternating vigor and tenderness. When she has to dance on stage, she slides her tongue out of her mouth and suggestively runs her hands up and down the pole in front of her all the while holding my gaze with hers. She has a dirty, slutty way about her I find very appealing. She tells me her name is Miao (like the meow of a cat) and the bar fine is 500 with another 1500 for her time all night. I hem and haw and dawdle over my orange juice for the next 45 minutes. She seems to get a bit insecure asking if I would rather be with another girl at the club. I tell her I like her just fine but suggest that 1000 baht was all I was willing to pay. She snaps up the offer, and I was ridden hard all night with her hands, lips, tongue, and other anatomical parts. She wanted to stay, but I sent her on her way in the morning. She would have killed me if I had spent more time with her.

The morning after Miao leaves, I decide to head to a gym I saw along Beach Road not far from the hotel. It is not open yet, so I stop into the bar where Nik works. She is there and talks with me but does not remember me from the day before. She seems very embarrased by this, and I chide her about her forgetfulness. We laugh together. I finish my cup of tea and tell her I shall return after my workout. When I do return, I am dripping wet from sweat, and she wipes my face and neck with one of those cold, wet towels offered at the bars. I tell her I am too sweaty and stinky and need to shower. She asks me to come back. Right after my shower, I do. When I get back to the bar, she shows me a note she has written (her written English, I would find out, is much better than her spoken English). The note gives her apologies for not remembering me from yesterday. She is glad I came back. She is happy to see me. One of her fellow hostesses at the bar tells me Nik would like me to pay her barfine. This I do gladly and with the help of her co-workers, we climb aboard a baht bus and go to "the top of the hill" to visit a temple. We have our fortunes told there, and I find it endearing the way she solemnly performs a ritual at one of the alters. We make plans to go for an elephant ride that next day. I again start feeling the flood of PEA. But that night, something is wrong -- though she is warm and soft and pretty, her lovemaking is rather uninspired. I wonder if I made a mistake making those next day plans.

But a promise is a promise and the next day we head out to some mega tourist trap with shows and elephant rides. As the day goes on, Nik seems to become warmer with more laughter, sweeter kisses, and deeper smiles. That night she opens up more. The next day we go to two more temples. She tells me how much fun she is having with me. Her eyes hold mine for longer and longer periods of time. She spontaneously kisses me and massages my temples. By that night, she can't seem to do enough with her fingers, hands, mouth, and tongue. She tells me she only wants to make me happy because I have treated her so well. Back at the hotel, she writes a love note to me in Thai and scrambles from the room to have it translated into English for me to read. I am awash with PEA. The next day I cancel my final two-day reservation at the Grand President and decide to stay in Pattaya. I have to give up my delux room at the Sunshine and move to a standard room for these final two days. No big deal. The remainder of our time is a blur. I do recall a lot of laughter and playfulness. Our last night together, she gives me a gift of a winter scarf and a stocking cap with two tassles on it (I had told her it was cold in the USA). She tells me the two tassles represent her and me together. We go to her bar for a drink. The owner/papasan approaches me and tells me he has heard what a good man I am. He presents me with a gift wrapped box. Inside is a new alligator skin wallet. I know he was probably just showing his appreciation for the steady income of barfines I provided, but I am still deeply touched.

That was my trip in the proverbial nutshell. Four different ladies in 11 days must be a new low for this forum. And I still never got one of those famous soapies, although I did get a 2 hour, traditional Thai massage for 400 baht. There is so much I have not done or seen. I can't wait to get back there.

Great report - you just can't explain what happens until you've been there. I have gone with so many wild plans only to have something happen that just changes everything. It sounds like you had a wonderful time.

Great for a first timer. And dont worry about you women count. You had some quality sessions. I also did 4 women on my first trip.

I cant tell you how many folks are bummed after returning from Thailand.

Harley, you're right.

God forbid. Bark, I see you retiring there.

Nice report. I don't think you have anything to worry about re: low 'body counts'? What's the price tag on falling in love multiple times in less than two weeks? Sounds like a helluva vacation to me!

good report: things being a blurr and all, probably more fun that way.

are you already planning your return trip?

go with the flow

Bark,

Even one great one in Thailand is worth two dozen in the bush in the US! Ever had four in two weeks here? Rest my case!

Nice first trip to the LOS.

Sandman

Thank you all for your kind comments. Good point, Sandman. It would take me 20 years here in the USA to get the experiences I had in two weeks in Thailand. Pasathai, I started planning my next trip about 48 hours after arriving in Bangkok. I get 3 weeks vacation per year which, considering the time involved in traveling there, I guess works out to 2 vacations a year. That's not enough. So, DickJohnson, I definitely need to start considering a retirement home in LOS. Or do they need any USA-trained nurses there? Hmmmmm... Yep, Harley and Porker, it was one wonderful, helluva vacation. Like I wrote, I can't wait to get back there. Again, thanks for all your kind comments.

Bark-- Some of my best trips were 2 or 3 weeks with ONE girl -- not the one I married but another I should have. Took her to Pattaya, Phuket and never felt like I needed any others. Quality beats quantity any day. Next trip for you might be different but it sounds like you are easily smitten and the Thai poo-ying certainly know how to make a guy feel like there is no one else for them but you !!!!

Bark, welcome to that infectious fever known as Thailand!!! Totally agree with Khun Mor; quality is more important than quantity. And there's always "the next trip."