Rating the Bars

I didn't go into every bar in Angeles on this trip – even though that was my goal – but I did rate each bar in or around the time that I was in it. I created a ratings system based on a 1 – 5 scale in the following categories: Barfineable Girls, Lady Drink Pressure, Interaction with the Girls, General Atmosphere, Overall Fun Factor. Each category was rated as follows:

Barfineable Girls – a very simple scale 0 - 1 barfineable (in my opinion) girl = 1 point; 3 barfineable girls = 3 points; 5 or more barfineable girls = 5 points.

Lady Drink Pressure – 1 = Drink Sluts abound; 3 = A little pressure generally from the mamasan; 5 = No pressure at all

Interaction with the Girls – 1 = bored girls doing the AC Shuffle; 3 = Interaction initiated by Customer; 5 = This is a WHOLE lot of fun!

General Atmosphere – 1 = Music too damn loud and its too freaking hot in the bar; 3 = Either the music's too loud or it's too freaking hot; 5 = Optimal conditions in bar.

Overall Fun Factor – 1 = a walk-through or maybe one beer tops; 3 = I'm having a good time; 5 = I haven't had this much fun with my clothes on in a LONG time.

For those of you bad at math, the maximum points a bar can get is 25, the minimum is 5. You may not like my scale, but screw you, it's MY scale.

In general, I rated the Perimeter bars a little higher than the Fields bars (average score of 14.29 to 13.47). However, if you toss out Icarus, Welcome Inn and Club 68 (my three lowest rated bars on Fields), the averages are almost exactly the same. So anyway, here's how I rated the bars.

Fields Bars I'll start at lower Fields and work my way up to the Checkpoint.

Club 68 – Overall Rating – 12/25

Barfineable Girls – 1
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 1
General Atmosphere – 4
Overall Fun Factor – 1

I never saw this place before Porker and I rolled in after visiting the McDonalds on MacArthur. There was only one other customer in there at the time. He bought us both a drink and suggested that this bar sucked. I didn't see anything to contradict his opinion, so it was one beer and gone for us. They do have a great slogan though “We owe you one.”

Blue Nile Executive – Overall Rating ??

Just did a quick walk through here. I wasn't here even long enough to give it a rating. I've never really cared for this bar, but in all honesty have never really given it a chance.

Blue Nile – Overall Rating ??

Ditto the report from Blue Nile Executive. I've just never liked the vibe of this bar.

Nero's – Overall Rating – 12/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

Porker and I stopped in here one afternoon right as they opened but only because we had stopped at the poker room across the street to find out what the deal was and it was POURING when we left there. We were the ONLY customers there for about 45 minutes. There were a couple of girls I would have barfined, and most of the girls were dancing their asses off on stage. When we didn't get served very quickly, Porker's complaint to the Filipino manager got us a couple of free drinks. If they'd only get rid of the stupid slot machines in this place it might have some potential. There are NOTICEABLY fewer girls here than I have seen in the past.

Bedrock – Overall Rating – 15/25

Barfineable Girls – 3
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 2

Recently re-opened after an extensive remodeling. A couple of very barfineable girls here, but overall a pretty generic experience. For some reason I've always liked this bar, but have never had good luck with the girls I've pulled from here.

Golden Nile – Overall Rating – 11/25

Barfineable Girls – 4
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 1
General Atmosphere – 1
Overall Fun Factor – 1

Some decent looking girls here, but they're too far away to fuck with. Plus having to walk up three flights of stairs past un-used slot machines is not a lot of fun. Throw in 105 pesos drinks and you can see why I only went here once.

Dirty Duck – Overall Rating – 12/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 1

Porker claims to have had great luck with barfines from here during his pre-married life. I've just never really gotten into this place.

Champagne – Overall Rating – 14/25

Barfineable Girls – 3
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

This bar was ALWAYS packed with girls every time I went in. So packed, in fact, that I wondered if any of them ever barfined! I've never had great luck here.

Welcome Inn – Overall Rating – 6/25

Barfineable Girls – 1
Lady Drink Pressure – 2
Interaction with the Girls – 1
General Atmosphere – 1
Overall Fun Factor – 1

One dancer, waitress asking us for drinks as we stuck our head in the door, and a nonsensical aggressive drunk whose words I'm STILL trying to figure out. How does this place stay open? In all fairness, I think we did stick our heads in on Easter Sunday. So maybe that wasn't the best time for a review. But if your going to be that bad – SHUT IT DOWN FOR A DAY.

Voodoo – Overall Rating – 15/25

Barfineable Girls – 3
Lady Drink Pressure – 3
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 3

This place runs hot and cold. Sometimes it can be fun, other times it's plain boring. I pulled a girl out of here my first night who was decent looking, but one of us wasn't good in bed. Did get a free round from the Papasan, so that's a plus.

King of Diamonds – Overall Rating – 12/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

When I suggested going here one afternoon, Porker didn't even know it existed. Decent line-up but a small, small bar. Like Voodoo seems to run hot and cold.

Typhoon – Overall Rating – 16/25

Barfineable Girls – 3
Lady Drink Pressure – 3
Interaction with the Girls – 4
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 3

Not as many girls here as I have seen in the past – trust me that's a good thing. The stage used to be so packed it was difficult to find the cuties. There's also one doorgirl here I have seen outside of Typhoon every night I've been in Angeles. She's kind of cute with big-ass ears. Has anyone EVER barfined her?

Treasure Island – Overall Rating – 19/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 5
General Atmosphere – 4
Overall Fun Factor – 4

If only they had a lot of good-looking girls here this could be paradise. As it is, the mostly below-average line-up is buffered by some of the friendliest/raunchiest girls in town. I like this place – can you tell?

Just Stunners – Overall Rating ??

Didn't make it in the former Tender Touch on this trip. I wonder if the midget still works there?

Lancelot – Overall Rating – 14/25

Barfineable Girls – 3
Lady Drink Pressure – 3
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 2

I hadn't been in this bar for a couple of trips. There were some decent looking girls here and they were fairly interactive, but there's just a strange vibe for me here.

Rhapsody – Overall Rating – 16/25

Barfineable Girls – 3
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 3

Another hot and cold place. I went in here one night and it was SO dead and boring I vowed not to go back. Porker suggested going here a couple of nights later and I grudgingly went along only to have an outstanding time. If I rated the bar solely on my last visit it would be much higher, but combining both visits brings the overall score down to just average.

La Pasha – Overall Rating – 13/25

Barfineable Girls – 3
Lady Drink Pressure – 3
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 2

Like Lancelot, I hadn't been here for a couple of trips. They have a ton of girls on stage, but not too many cuties. For as many girls as they have, I would expect a much higher hottie ratio than exists.

Owl's Nest – Overall Rating ??

Didn't make it inside this bar.

La Bamba/Lollipops – Overall Rating – 16/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls –4
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 3

I'll rate these two together as the dancers rotate back and forth. Was here one afternoon and had fun fucking with the girls while sitting near the stage. Too bad they're not very good looking!

Gecko's – Overall Rating – 16/25

Barfineable Girls – 3
Lady Drink Pressure – 3
Interaction with the Girls – 4
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 3

In the past, I've really like this bar and had good results from the girls I've barfined from here. This trip Gecko's seemed to take a step back. The girls were not quite as good-looking although the waitresses tend to be very interactive and the place always seemed to be packed. That's not a good thing considering how small this bar is. This rating is probably a little high looking back, but I expect that, like the phoenix, Gecko's will rise again.

Dollhouse – Overall Rating – 12/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 3
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

This bar is what it is. Frankly, for one of the “big” bars, I think the talent here sucks. Porker and I and our girls caught the “cultural” show here one night. I sat there and made fun of it for the 15 – 20 minutes it took to complete. On the plus side, they did put the NCAA Championship game on the big screen for us and I didn't have to deal with a double-ladies drink scam.

Valhalla – Overall Rating - ???

Never made it in here. If the rumor of it's permanent closure after a recent raid is true, it looks as if I'll never have the chance to go in.

Carousel – Overall Rating – 13/25

Barfineable Girls – 3
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

Another bar I've never really gotten into. I did try the pizza at the Bistro out front for the first time and thought it was excellent. So, it's got that going for it. Honestly, I've never spent enough time here to make an honest assessment of the place.

Atlantis – Overall Rating – 15/25

Barfineable Girls – 5
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

Probably the biggest concentration of good-looking girls in Angeles. But they are so freaking far away that you can't make any connection with them at all. Also, who's brilliant idea was it to put the ugly looking wigs on the doorgirls? That's one ad person I don't want working for me! I'm not a fan of the “superbar” but this is probably the best of the bunch.

Crystal Palace – Overall Rating – 13/25

Barfineable Girls – 4
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 1

Another collection of hotties, who don't interact with the customer. Of course, I was here with a barfine so that may have made a difference. A friend of the barfine worked there and was pointing out the lesbians among the 3,000 peso barfine girls. It is a surprisingly high percentage.

Byrd Cage – Overall Rating - ???

Just popped my head in looking for Bud one evening. Didn't stay long enough to make a judgment on this trip.

Tropix – Overall Rating – 20/25

Barfineable Girls – 4
Lady Drink Pressure – 2
Interaction with the Girls – 5
General Atmosphere – 4
Overall Fun Factor – 5

I'm surprised that this is my highest rated bar in the Fields area. I stopped in here on three different occasions and had a blast each time. I pulled two quality barfines (including one half-black girl who was my second best barfine on this trip) from here and fucked with a cherry girl who everyone in the bar simply called “Cherry Girl.” The only downside is there tended to be a lot of attempted lady drink leeches. Remember that the girls with the green background on their numbers are the 3,000 pesos barfine girls. Thank god I avoided them in my drunken stupors.

Agsaya – Overall Rating - ??

Didn't make it in here.

Body Shop – Overall Rating – 17/25

Barfineable Girls – 4
Lady Drink Pressure – 3
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 4

I had heard that the quality of the line-up at the Body Shop had gone downhill, but I found there to be a good number of what I consider barfineable girls here. The waitresses were VERY interactive; the dancers not so much. Overall, I had a quality time in here every time I visited.

Las Vegas – Overall Rating - ???

Didn't make it in here.

Eager Beavers – Overall Rating – 13/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

I never went in here when it was Stingers so this was my first visit. If I remember correctly, I went in here on Easter Sunday – probably not the best time for a review. The place has potential, even though the layout is a little bit funky.

Roadhouse – Overall Rating – 14/ 25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

Great 2 – 1 Happy Hour here and decent looking if a bit standoffish girls. Took one for the team here as Bud had pulled down a little strawberry girl to sit with while his wife stepped out for a few minutes. When the wife came back quicker than expected, Bud's strawberry girl became “my girl.” I'm not sure his wife bought it, but it was worth the try.

Anglewitch – Overall Rating - ???

Didn't make it in here this trip.

Butterfly Rock – Overall Rating - ???

Didn't make it in here this trip.

Barhoppin' – Overall Rating - ???

Didn't make it in here this trip.

Checkers – Overall Rating - ???

Didn't make it in here this trip.

The Honey Pot – Overall Rating - ???

Didn't make it in here this trip

Klub Klass – Overall Rating - ???

Didn't make it in here this trip.

Bunny Ranch – Overall Rating – 13/25

Barfineable Girls – 3
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

I've heard some good things about this bar, but didn't see them during my visit here. I think it's got potential, but got blown away by it's neighbor on this trip.

Coyote Ugly – Overall Rating – 19/25

Barfineable Girls – 4
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 4
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 4

Along with TI and Camelot, the second-highest ranked Fields area bar on this trip. Table top dancers, 60 peso SMLs, a bunch of good-looking girls and a papasan who bought me several drinks. What more can you ask for? One of the tabletop dancers had the body of a true superstar – a 10 in anyone's book – although her face was a mere 8. Unfortunately for me, my stalker came from this bar which put it off-limits as I tried to shake her. (FYI, the stalker has since gone back to Manila and got a job at the Mall of Asia claiming that she will never go back to Pampanga because there are too many bastos guys there – and she still claims her undying love for me. It's a good thing I gave her a throw-away email address.)

Brown Sugar – Overall Rating – 12/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 3
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

Ugly girls, lazy waitresses and a shitty layout. Can you tell I don't like this place?

Camelot – Overall Rating – 19/25

Barfineable Girls – 5
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 4
Overall Fun Factor – 3

While here one night at the end of an incredible barhop, Porker boldly claimed that there was not one girl on stage that he wouldn't barfine. Now, Porker was as drunk as I have ever seen him – I had drank at least 15 SMLs by this time and he was averaging 2 rum and cokes per 1.5 of my SMLs – having said that, I would have barfined all but about two. Of course, we were so drunk and (in their eyes) toxic by that time that I had no chance of convincing one of these girls to go with me. I always meant to go back, but, as sometimes happens in AC, I got side-tracked.

Alaska – Overall Rating – 10/25

Barfineable Girls – 1
Lady Drink Pressure – 3
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 1

Another bar I've never really gotten into. Porker and I were in here LATE on the night of the epic barhop and there was not a single girl (who was not a cherry girl) that I would have barfined. There was one cherry girl, but she was marginal at best. Props to Alaska for putting the cherry girls in red bikinis. It makes them easier to spot.

Insomnia – Overall Rating – 11/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 1

At a time in the not-too-distant past, I used to have a lot of fun here. Now the only girl worth sitting with in the place was the doorgirl at Porker's side. It's sad how far this bar has fallen.

D'Club – Overall Rating – 12/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

I have never see as many girls in D'Club as I did on this trip. Unfortunately, most of them were butt-ugly. You should have seen the expression on our waitress' face when Porker tried to get bastos with her. Priceless!

Icarus – Overall Rating – 9/25

Barfineable Girls – 1
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 1
General Atmosphere – 1
Overall Fun Factor – 1

I thought Koren oriented bars were supposed to be packed with drink slut hotties? If so, I missed it on this night. And it was fairly early too – around 8:00 PM. There was not a single girl I would consider barfining in the place. Truly repulsive.


Perimeter Bars – I'm not going to name all of these, just the ones I went into. Remember the average score here was 14. Any score higher than that was an above-average bar for me.

Stampede Bar – Overall Rating – 13/25

Barfineable Girls – 1
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

Atmosphere rating takes a hit here as we visited during a brown-out and it got damned hot. Unfortunately, there's just not many good-looking girls here, save a pretty decent-looking door girl.

Cherry's Bar – Overall Rating – 16/25

Barfineable Girls – 4
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 3

Same brown-out here, but much cooler and a MUCH better selection of girls. However, I'm willing to bet the cherry girl ratio was VERY high here.

Dr. Holm's Bar – Overall Rating – 13/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

The good: cheap draft beer. The bad: ugly girls. A couple of waitresses caught my eye, but they were already occupied.

Eruptions Bar – Overall Rating – 20/25

Barfineable Girls – 4
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 4
Overall Fun Factor – 4

A very big surprise on this trip. In the past, this bar has been a waste – not so on this trip. Bud and I stopped in here one evening and there were four girls (including my half-black, half-Filipina waitress) I would have barfined in a minute. Unfortunately, I had other plans that night and never made it back here.

Gentlemen's Club – Overall Rating – 12/25

Barfineable Girls – 1
Lady Drink Pressure – 3
Interaction with the Girls – 4
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

Have spent many fun night here in the past, but the quality of girls has declined dramatically in this bar. It's too bad, because I have some great memories from here.

Touch of Class – Overall Rating – 13/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

Just another slightly-below average bar in Angeles. Not much to really say about this place.

Peanut's Bar – Overall Rating – 15/25

Barfineable Girls – 3
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 2

A surprising bar for me on this trip. There were several cuties in here, but the Fun Factor takes a hit as I was here at about 12:30 in the afternoon and was still hung-over from the night before. There is potential here.

Nifty's – Overall Rating – 16/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 4
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 3

We were going to leave Peanut's so Bud went on a scouting mission to see which of these little bars had the best talent. His report – Nifty's. It was apparently “Nurse Day” at Nifty's as the girls were all in uniforms. However, Bud and Porker scooped up the two best-looking girls and that brought down the fun factor for me. A classic AC moment happened here as Porker – who had been drinking early on a Cialis-laden stomach – went to the bathroom to blow chunks, returned and continued to party. Had that been me, I'd have been down for the count. Kudos to the Pork Meister.

Matrix Brawn – Overall Rating – 16/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 2
Interaction with the Girls – 5
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 3

They ain't much to look at, but they know how to suck a cock. In the end, that's all that matters!

Fire and Ice – Overall Rating – 13/25

Barfineable Girls – 1
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 3
Overall Fun Factor – 1

I used to like this bar a lot. I have pulled some nice girls from here. However, on the last two trips, it has been pretty bad.

Electric Blue – Overall Rating – 16/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 4
Overall Fun Factor – 3

A new (for me) bar that had a couple of decent girls. There is some potential here. Flirted with a girl in this bar one day when barhopping with Bud and Porker. Tried to come back for her a couple of times and never made the hook-up.

Happy Rock – Overall Rating – 19/25

Barfineable Girls – 4
Lady Drink Pressure – 4
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 4
Overall Fun Factor – 4

Big turn-around for this bar since it re-opened. I was kind of caught up on one girl here, but was never able to make the connection due to a variety of factors. A bad round of golf....

Honeyko's – Overall Rating – 19/25

Barfineable Girls – 5
Lady Drink Pressure – 3
Interaction with the Girls – 3
General Atmosphere – 4
Overall Fun Factor – 4

The most consistent bar on the Perimeter trip-in and trip-out. The one thing I could do without are the drink slut waitresses who try to massage you while you are sitting down. This much fun and I never saw Damien in the bar.

Wee George's Bar – Overall Rating – 9/25

Barfineable Girls – 1
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 1
General Atmosphere – 1
Overall Fun Factor – 1

This place was bad. And I had heard some nice things about it. In all fairness I was here late which is NEVER a good time to be a in a Perimeter Bar, but YIKES! I'll give it another chance earlier in the day on my next trip.

Roadies – Overall Rating – 11/25

Barfineable Girls – 2
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 1
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 1

Ditto the Wee George review. Here too late, no more hotties.

Lost in Asia – Overall Rating – 10/25

Barfineable Girls – 1
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 1
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 1

Ditto the previous to reviews. Late in the evening, nothing but fuglies.

Mirrors – Overall Rating – 14/25

Barfineable Girls – 3
Lady Drink Pressure – 5
Interaction with the Girls – 2
General Atmosphere – 2
Overall Fun Factor – 2

This place has potential if only the girls would be a little more interactive. If I stayed at the Clarkton, I could probably find several doable targets here. However, what's the deal with the “cultural” show? That just ain't right.


I didn't take many good pictures this trip - just a part of the "bad round."

A couple of fun dancers from Coyote Ugly.

Photos: Dancers - Coyote Ugly 01 02 03 04 05

This girl spent about 40 minuted polishing my knob one night before I decided I couldn't finish in her mouth. To her credit, she took a hell of a pounding afterwards without complaint.

Photo: Santos Girl 06

Here's the Stalker. Apparently, she's back in Manila now working at the Mall of Asia.

Photos: Stalker - Coyote Ugly 07 08 09 10

Good-looking doorgirl from Stampede/Cherry's.

Photo: Doorgirl - Stampede 11

Great report!!

Hehe, thanks again for trying to cover me in Road House! Wife got back at me with the white russians though!

Hey, we were there at around the same time and I agree with your bar ratings almost completely. Thanks for the detail run-down. Many of the bars have totally different personalities depending on which day and what time of the day you go in. So always stick your head in and have a look for yourself. I must give Camelot and Eruptions more of a chance next time.

Thanks for this great report. I enjoyed reading your rating, makes me remember my last trip in Decembre. My favorite bars were Geckos, LaPasha, Eruption, Champagne, Camelot, and DollHouse for the show. I consider DH a good place to get your BF. I will return in 2 months !! cant wait.

Massive amount of work...thanks! Fun work I am sure!

wow! you really took good notes or have good memory. i don't even remember the names of the clubs i went to! hehe! there were a lot of hombres there at the same time! AsianBear and I were making our rounds during easter as well. thank you for taking the time to post the details!

Man, this was one EPIC report, and I've gotta say, El Apodo pulled no punches about any of this. On AC-centric forums and amongst locals, it's amazing how things get tilted for/against a bar depending on whether the papasan buys one a free drink or not.

I wish I had the energy to comment on all the bars we visited together. I generally agree with you about everything you've posted, we have similar tastes/expectations for service/lineups.

Some preliminary comments, though:

CPH was awesome this trip, like usual, only the internet worked awesomely well. I had a room facing the alley between CPH and Orchid and only noticed the construction noise ONCE. There were no air-con probs whatsoever, and most of the time we were there it was hot and without rain. Staying at CPH for 32 USD per night and using the pac Breeze pool is a no-brainer, as far as I'm concerned if you're on a budget.

Carousel food is damned good for the money. I don't think anything costs more than p200, and portions are BIG. Contrast to Kokomoz, which has NOTHING anymore on the menu for <220 pesos, and marg Station's prices are so horrible I won't even walk in to glance at a menu anymore.

Honey Kos/Damian -- Bud and I hit it the day you left (I'd leave the next day), and it was off the CHAIN! Bud was begging me to ST some chocolatey, gumby-esque nympho, but I was in big-rack mode, and her pissing in a glass onstage kinda of threw me. Not to mention that Damian DRANK IT! (No BS!). I couldn't help to feel sorry for poor Epimetheus stuck in the USA, as he would have MARRIED THAT GIRL!

The ONE bar that Bud never seemed to steer us to on perimeter -- FOXYS -- had by FAR the best lineup I saw there in two weeks, and there were probably 5/top 20 girls I saw in AC bars in 2 weeks working there.

Your convo with the La Pasha girl was insanely funny! Too bad the humor was lost on her. To be honest, I wouldn't remember the La Pasha girl that gave me the fake phone # if a gun was to my head. I do remember having fun there, that night, though. I Kinda remember Camelot better. Lotsa above average looking girls, but I'd bet bad attitudes are to blame for their not seeking barfines than out obnoxiousness.

Lancelot had a FUCKLOAD of girls, but none onstage that seemed remotely interested in doing business. I bet the PI BF were lined up across the block to take them home at night.

Or... Testing a theory from your showgirl report, maybe they're all DYKES?

Teq. Reef was good, better than I remembered from Pattaya. The cheaper stuff on the menu seemed tastier and a FAR better value than the main entrees. The waitresses were amazingly eager to please. This is NOT common in AC!

MY Matrix Brawn trips were immensely dissapointing -- showed up too early the 1st time, like 3 girls applying warpaint to prepare for their shift, and the 2nd time, some local Pinoys were hugging the bar as hangers on to some dickhead bell-ringing pasty-faced giant-gutted whiteys which shut down ALL fun onsite possibilities for several hours the last afternoon I had in town. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Re: Cialis stomach-churning: I LOVE Cialis. It makes me feel like an On Demand Shane Diesel taking a half tab every other day. But... Mixing it with any serious amount of drinking and not eating every 2-3 hours makes me projectilely hurl! I know dr's advise not mising it with booze in the first place, but there's a catch-22 for mongering with me: If one is neither FUCKING NOR BOOZING, what in the HELL ELSE is there TO DO?

End part 1. Thanks MILLIONS for your excellent report so far.

Great report and I also basically agree with your bar review. As per Porker's follow up my last two trips both Foxys and Nasty Duck on Perimeter had good line ups.

Lancelot has become a Korean dominated bar . Porker -- Maybe if you had taped your eyes down into slits the girls would have paid more attention to you.

Wow, sounds like I was reading one of my past reports...See Bud, I am not the only one who thinks AC has a tiny amount of hot girls. Still a hell of a lot better than being stuck here in farang land.

Porker, have an ex-honeyko who went to work now for Tropix, as a "Spotlight Girl". It's the same deal as Dollhouse and Atlantis. They all have the 3,000 Peso barfine for their best girls. She writes me emails and says that between better salary, and more money when she gets a barfine she's making more than before. She actually said the way things are going soon she'd have more money than me.

This is what bothers me about these places. They could give all the bar owners the idea that they can raise the barfines and the dumb porineers will pay! I avoid that group at all costs. I also don't like their setups as interaction with the girls is hard which turns me off.


BTW: I think that you can order Carousel food at LaPasha or Typhoon and that they will deliver it for you. I know that you can order their Pizza that way, as I did it with Hippie one night last year.

Thanks to everyone for their kind words. It's a dirty job, but someone's got to do it.

As to my previous claim about branching into another location, I just bought a plane ticket back to the PI for July. I WILL NOT stay in AC the whole time, but will probably spend the majority of my time there. Just like golf, AC will eventually suck you dry - in more ways than one! I wouldn't mind looking at Indonesia this summer. Anyone willing to show a rookie the ropes?


EA

"A friend of the barfine worked there and was pointing out the lesbians among the 3,000 peso barfine girls. It is a surprisingly high percentage."

Can't wait til this is added to your rubric! lol!

EA,

Nice, honest, report. I'm a bit tired of the "I had such a blast" BS reports. I think you hit the nail on the head, short trips to AC can be very fun, if and when you find a few great girls. But there's no guarantee that will happen even if you stay beyond a week. I recommend 5 days maximum. If it doesn't pan out you can go elsewhere, if it does you can quit while you're ahead.