This is a subject that's often intrigued me. I can't believe I'm posting this ... anyway ...

Does anyone have any hints as to how one might double-check one's hunches about the shape a woman's body despite the fact that she's still clothed? I mean, short of grabbing her and undressing her, of course ... Too often I've let misleading clothing -- whether tent-like OR extremely tight -- hook me into an undesirable deal.

Here is one strange thing I've noticed. Often, women with very square jaws and "masculine" noses have large, often long and droopy, breasts. Particularly if the women are otherwise petite, their breasts will be very large naturally. The shape of their breasts is generally something you can't figure out until you've actually gotten ALL of her upper clothing off, so having a good way to guess would be, well, helpful.

I know, this sounds like a silly thread, but I thought I'd send it off to Monger-Land as a neat little distraction. Here are some other dumb observations: you can always guess that she has a rounded tummy, if she keeps something on her midriff when she's promenading naked (as when dancing on stage as a stripper). No, more accurately, you can tell that she is INSECURE about having a rounded tummy, whether nor not she actually has one.

Also, generally, nipple color turns out to parallel the palms of their hands. If the palms tend toward brown, so do the nipples; or toward pink. And (last pointer) I've always noticed that women who wear a lot of pancake makeup tend to have very well-shaved pussies. I don't know why.

I don't pretend that any of this is scientific, just some interesting observations. I wish I had some way of knowing whether or not I'd be pleased by a woman's body, before having to go through all the rigamarole of getting her undressed, whether with a civilian or a provider -- by that time, your cost is already sunk, in whatever form, you'd better enjoy it no matter what you unwrap. Like ordering off the internet ...

BG

BG, haven't you ever heard of X-Ray Specs?

Why guess, or worry about X-ray specs, when for U$ 10.00 you can find out ?

Pauncho

Erip an X-ray machine weighs over 1000 lbs and needs 240 volts.

Book_guy

I think thats why I like strip-clubs so much...no surprises. You get what you see.

I love Nogales now for all its strip clubs.

Before I was relocated to AZ, I used to spend some time in TJ. Back in the 70's and 80's, the zona norte was mainly for locals, with a few gringos who spoke good spanish. The really hot girls were on Revolution in the almost too numerous strip clubs.

When they started to clean up Revolution a lot of the action was moved to the Zona Norte.

I remember on of the first times at adelitas about 10-11 years ago. I got this good looking little chica. I was totally shocked when I discovered she had one nipple!!!. She was very freindly,cute and enthusiastic, but that one nipple was truly deflating. I managed to finish, and every time I came into AB in the next months, she was always bugging me. One fellow monger I was comparing notes with one night, aked me what was wrong with her. I told him " She got one nipple, dude"

He though that was real neat and took off after her.
About that same time ( about 10 years ago) I went into the Unicorno. There was this GREAT looking chica, that kind of limped around.. and never danced. She came and sat down next to me and started rubbing my crotch and offering a session for $20 bucks. I was about to go with it when I noticed she had a prosthetic leg!!! Although I heard one-legged girls are good in bed, I really wasn't in the mood after the initial shock. Still she was great looking and the next time I was in TJ I actually went looking for her. She wasn't at the unicorno, but a chica said she was at a club around the corner (Isis?). I left to go look for her whenit occured to me i was kinda like the fugitive.. running around TJ looking for a one-legged hooker. I kinda gave-up after that thought.

Another time at the Sans-Souci, (about 6 years ago before the TV were truly starting to take over the place) A fellow monger gave me the warning, as I had been picking up dancers and going to the tecate around the corner for quite some time, to check before going back to the room. There was this awesome blond on the stage, that was getting a lot of attention from everybody, long and lean, she looked like she would give a good ride, well as I was about to tip a dollar to her I slipped my finger around the crotch area of her g-string and gave a good yank!! (don't try this in the US) I was REALLY shocked to see a little peter looking back at me.!!!

Latina a women are also masters of the elastic undergarment which will hide a least 20 pounds, I like to slip my hand around their waist, If It is really hard to the touch, it probably pretty packed. Same with the brassiere LOL.

I decided a while ago that unless I could just go with the face, I would only go with those dancers where I could really see all they had. So far no surprizes other than some overly hard breasts.

No more one-nipple,one-legged women for me.

OG

Wow OG, you really have an eye for talent. Nogie is a good safe place for you.

Btw, what was at the tip of the breast where the 2nd nipple should have been...just an areola or not even that?

I used to enjoy getting lap dances in NYC with a famous one legged porn star of the late 70's/early 80's, Long Jeanne Silver...she was very cute and had a big screen porn and stripping career utilizing a prosthetic leg. She'd cover it with a full length legging, walked perfectly and you'd never know she had one leg short of contact...but in the movies I believe she got kinky with it in ways you can imagine. Getting lap dances with her was wood on wood. I'm surprised it didn't start fires!

Hey, do they make those elastic undergarments that hide 20 lbs for hombres?

OG: Interesting observations about TJ. Once, at Unicornio about nine years ago, I ran into this absolutely incredible looking Latina from SD--gorgeous body, incredible breasts, pretty face. Claimed she came over to TJ on the weekends to dance 'cause she loved the music and the attention on stage.

But when she spoke, you couldn't understand a word she said. She had some kind of speech impediment and all her words came out slurred and mashed up, kind of like a long moan. She looked like a dream, sounded like a wounded animal. I still think of her.

To hell with the 1 titted, 1 legged hookers. I want a no-legged 3-titted hooker. The closest I ever got was Emma de Puebla (SG) who has a diminutive third nipple (Nothing to be interested in).
Pauncho

Erip,

The nipple just wasn't there!. Just one big areola, not even an inverted nipple..nothing. It was really bazzar. I tried to ask her what happened but she quickly changed the subject so I didn't push it.

The first time I was at the Unicorno was in 1976 I was in college, and a few buddies and I just came back from the Ensenada Ride. (This was when I was still athletic) and the Ensenada ride was more of a race than the big tourista thing now. My freind was looking for the "donkey show" and some street tout said "give me $5 and I'll tell you". After we were suckered in, we actually had a good time. I've always had fond memories of the place, and on all my visits to TJ, I always pop in for at least one of my favorites.. The $5 hand job in the back booths. ( although I daresay the cost has probably gone up). I now get vitually the same thing at the clubs in Nogales in the guise of a lapdance.!!

I had already known of the extra's back then at the Unicorno, in fact I was introduced to the delights of the latina when I was a wee wanker in High Schhol on one of my many surfing trips down south. But that is another story.

I once tried to wear one of those "man girdles" you know .. the ones that are neopreme rubber like a wetsuit.. that go around your waist, makes you look thinner, lose weight etc., etc. It actually did work, I lost about 10 lbs wearing the thing for a week, and it did make me look thinner,, But it made mt midsection sweat like a dog and was really uncomfortable after about 1-2 hours. I just got into a habit of wearing bigger and bigger shirts LOL.

Someone tell me if they find the one-legged hooker!!

OG

book_guy
What I like to do with chicas is do the body fat test. I like to pinch chicas arms and place my arm around waist and politely measure body fat.

Dudes...some of you guys really had some weird ass pussies...my dick went numbed reading your craps...but I must bow down on you guys to have the courage to finish for monger mission even after discovering the facts.

BookGuy, I usually buy them a drink, have them sit at the bar while I'm standing w/ my arms around them gently doing the USDA inspection. My only legitimate explanation to "women who wear a lot of pancake makeup tend to have very well-shaved pussies" is that if they like to take care of the way their looks then of course they also want to take care of 'the tool of their trade'.

As far as your observation regard "nipple color turns out to parallel the palms of their hands", I think the lights inside the bars might have hinder your visions on this....j/k...Palms colors are either pink, white, or pale stale. I have a chick w/ yellowish palms (which I told her to check w/ a doc. because she could have liver diseases), should it be safe for me to assume she has yellowish nipples???...wow...tasty...hahaha...

Simple, if she doesn't look great downstairs
then she isn't going to look better upstairs that's for sure.
So she better be a stripper onstage or be wearing something tight for me to take her upstairs.
Good indicators: nice full lips and her skin feeling warm too. I will feel the upper arm too,
pretending I am just playing games or being flirtatiuos but really I am checking for body fat and body temperature. A cold, flabby arm is no-go for me. If she tells me she had a kid under 1yo I won't take her either, because normally she'll have a loose pussy that is like fucking the air. (Just my criteria)

Oooh, I like that business about warm skin. Flab does get clammy easily, especially on a hot night if she's sweating. Also, have you ever noticed that the fatter the chick is, the firmer she is (and not in a good way)? I notice that the women who are almost skin-and-bones (almost!) have the most phenomenally soft bodies, because all that's left is the official adipose tissue. But women who have some "meat" or "baggage" are actually firmer, because the rolls of fat stick together in a very muscular way, much firmer than adipose tissue alone.

Comments?

Yeah.

Since adipose tissue is fat tissue, your last post has me completely confused. Whether it is official or unofficial, adipose is composed of fat cells.

For some reason most women who are really slender, as in an A cup, have the best looking asses. Whereas the ones who look good in the chest area often have butts that look like they want to wiggle, or waddle, out of their skin.

Speaking of what naked women look like..........

Does anyone have a preference for pussy lips shapes? I gravitate to the extremely butterfly types that are already slightly spread. Their lips tend to be more pronounced and also more elastical responsive to nibbles and other tongue action.

Fat puffy lips? No thanks. You can't flick them with your tongue and they pretty much just sit there looking pouty.

Pierced lips? Yuk! I hate the metal right there. It's so cold and hard looking.

I also dislike puffy lips. Above or below. Puffy just looks flabby to me ... like, lose weight chica! Also, you can't get in "up to the hilt" with your own ... umm ... appendage. I dated a "Reubenesque" woman once -- not very; she was about average for your typical North American well-endowed woman; 5'4", 140 lbs maybe? -- and the sex was bad. There was NO angle at which I felt like I had truly impaled her ... always swathed in her damn inner thighs. It was like fucking an inner tube.

Shy Guy: adipose tissue is composed of fat cells but is held together differently. Excess fat (fat which can be lost, eventually) on either gender has structural "fibers" running through it in a manner that's different from adipose tissue. Go to a strip club, meet a very very skinny girl, feel her ribcage or her lower arm near her wrist. Compare to an average-weight hottie; and to a gordita. You'll note that average and gordita have a "texture" in common, and the skinny one has a different, SOFTER texture.

Irony: skinnier is softer. Anyone, anyone?

I guess I don't have a preference for pussy lip (labia) shapes. What I like to see is a well-defined clitoris - that's where I spend most of my time at the Y anyway.

Oh, and don't you wish your tongue was 8 inches long sometimes... I have dreams of inspecting the cervix and points in-between con la lengua...

One unfortunate aspect of evolution is that many women don't even have a clitoris - or rather, their clit didn't "emerge" to the surface during natal development like it's "supposed" to. Strange evolutionary quirk. You know, until hormones kick-in, the penis and the clit are the same thing? This explains hermaphrodites - muy interesante...

I think it's fascinating how humans are essentially identical in the early stages of pre-natal development, and our hormones (and the timing therein) directed by your X or Y chromosome "turns us into" either male or female, anatomically anyway. This is why some chicas' clits never make it to the surface (or at least, very little of it). This hormonal timing, BTW, also helps determine a wide variety of other sexual and non-sexual characteristics - probably including homosexuality. Oops... got off topic - sorry.

Hey, what about pussy lip coloration? I like it all pink. I dined at a Y one time that was oddly discolored (almost grey) - yikes - what a buzz-kill.

Sorry to ramble, guys. MrBill is bored (and pussy-less) today.

Not the way I remember it in my gross anatomy and histology classes, but hey, you're the expert.

I'm not an expert (by far), but I do have a psych. degree with an emphasis on sexuality. I got most of my info from this and a stint at pre-nursing school (chemistry, biology, microbiology, anatomy, physiology, etc.) But the pre-natal shit is straight out of any anatomy/physiology textbook (at least one written in the last 20 years or so).

Shy: I defer to your superior knowledge regarding fat tissue and connective structures therein. I freely admit my explanation was gathered from a variety of unreliable sources and I have little authority on the subject. It made sense at the time, so you can "think of it" that way even if it isn't exactly true for what goes on UNDER the skin.

So, I say again, regardless of actual anatomical construction, ya gotta admit, there's a strange "softness" to very skinny women, a softness that less-skinny women DON'T have. Are you familiar with this phenomenon? Anyone?

Mr. Bill: I wasn't referring to you. Your description of embryonic and fetal sexual development pretty much matches what I learned.

Bookie: Yes I was referring to you and appreciate your clarification. Frankly, in my experience, women with lots of extra flab are pretty soft (but not when their flab is stuffed into bras and girdles two sizes too small), but lots of extra flab is a turn off to me.

On the other hand, I do prefer women with nice hourglass figures so the real petite skinny (I think of as boyish) figures I tend to avoid as well, so I really can't comment on their SF (softness factor). In that respect, I guess your experience does outstrip mine.

Speaking of soft.....

A lot of it has to do with age, IMHO. Skins gets less soft with age, especially if not taken care of properly.

My last trip I was reminded of just how good a young (18-19) woman can feel in my hands.

I consider myself quite the connoisseur of pussies, having spent considerable time closely examining them. (I also have quite the photo collection.)

Hoping to head back in another week or so, and I would be interested in any suggestions along the lines of what Tight Fit mentions above, especially if they are well trimmed and wet....

Oh wait, I can take care of creating the wetness...

(A bored Curious, also home pussyless...)

Just landed a job w/ the United States Whore Inspection Dept. (USWID) after completing my Whore Inspecting 101 course from reading this thread. Wow...my fuckable chicas in the zona went from <10% down to <0.1% if further applying all these criteria.

The sexiest thing about a woman's body is the way she moves it! Or rather the way it moves me.

(Message edited by copperfieldkid on February 20, 2013)