Oldest American at age 114, dies

TRENTON, New Jersey (AP) -- Elena Slough, documented as the nation's oldest person, died Sunday at the nursing home where her daughter died three days before. She was 114 or 115, according to different sources.

Slough died in her sleep at the Victoria Manor Nursing Home, where she and her 90-year-old daughter, Wanda Allen, lived, according to Judy Moudy, a supervisor at the Lower Township facility.

The Gerontology Research Group said Slough was born on July 8, 1889, making her 114 years old at the time of her death. But Krista Rickards, director of marketing at Victoria Manor, said Slough's son had a 1930 document that listed his mother as being born in 1888, which would have made her 115.

What is not in dispute is that Slough had been the oldest person in the United States since April, when 113-year-old Mary Dorothy Christian died in San Pablo, California. Christian was born on June 2, 1889.

Next on the list is the 112 year old mean old man only known as Ben. He is still active yet has major cases of amnesia and finds time to donate thousands of dollars a month to girls that only have sex with him in Tijuana, Mexico.

He also spends his spare time as a crossing guard at the local schools making sure all the kiddies get home safely. On Halloween it is a local tradition for the kids to throw condoms filled with liquid geritol at him. Despite several hip replacement surgeries he is an upbeat man and plans to give all his money to a fat pig that he fell in love with in a TJ whore bar called La Tropa.

Real fuckin funny.

See you Thursday night.

I hear that the purchase of another fatpigmobile is being contemplated since she called him and professed her undying love but still managed to slip into the conversation how she needs new wheels (for her padrote real novio and her joto-fucken primas).

Ben says you take things too far !!

He is reading an Auto trader as we speak

What gratitude this cunt has. He blows 1800 dollars on a car for her and she turns around and says its a piece of shit and sell it within a few months.

Well it was a piece of shit. Why buy an old ford when you can buy a used reliable Japanese car ?

maybe because he knew that he would be out of the picture if it always ran good and didnt need repairs so he purposely bought her a shitmobile to ensure an ongoing loving relationship

Now you've done it.

You have hurt my feelings and I am going to cry.

Did I mention I saw Sugar Pie yesterday?

We had a wonderful afternoon with lunch at the sombero shaped building on Aqua Caliente and a two hour dessert at La Mansion.

Afterwards we looked at new BMW's.

Potrero was the name of the rest..

I have a completely hilarious roast on this whole topic of Ben's puta selling his car. I'll inbox it to a selected, limited number of mongers that does not include Ben.

Lets all get together and send in money to Hombre to ban Ben from the boards

It was not my car.

I bought it for her and it was registered in her name.

Now it's in Texas Mike's name.

That was your great inbox you didn't want me to see?

What has happened to Texas Mike?

I have not seen him in at least a month.

He drove to Ensenada in the Escort, you silly man, that's why you haven't seen him.

I'm sure everyone will keep the inbox to themselves, under penalty of death.