I used to download a LOT. I guess I was your average horny college guy, or something. I happened to be involved in academia throughout the 1990s, and I had associations with major research universities, so I had pretty good 'net access. I had dialups from home, so I could get good pictures, at a rate that, at the time, was considered fast. I remember how excited I was when I got Archie for my Mac -- a program that would manage a thousand file downloads, you just click the URLs and let it maximize your bandwidth efficiency and sort them all into folders on your hard drive.
I found out what I liked, and I would spend whole afternoons carefully opening neatly organized windows with JPEGs in them, one after another, watching the little bar climb from 0% through 30, 60, 90, 100%. In some browsers you could watch the picture crawl down the screen, first the upper portion, her face, her neck, then her breasts, then belly, then pussy ... you'd know if you wanted to get the rest of it by then, it was usually just legs and scenery after that. I remember the good old days of "babe-rank" when it was a dot-com unto itself, and having access to twenty JPEGs of softcore North American beauties was a big excitement to me.
It was also a big savings. I had previously bought a lot of Playboy and Gallery magazine, and so forth. With a free 'net connection, my porn expenses dropped from about $40 a month to zero. Sure, I tried out a few online pay services -- I remember blowing almost $100 on a see-you-see-me proprietary video-conferencing thing in about 1995, for example. I'm glad I looked, but I didn't keep up the monthly membership.
Well, now I've moved out of academia and have a lower-grade connection from the house. I work on the 'net often enough in my office, looking up stuff or just checking the news. In fact, my home connection is actually a little faster now than it was back then (I've improved from the old 12K, and then 24K, up to a 56K). But relative to what else was available at the time, I'm a turtle now but was the speediest of hares back then. Then, my 12K was the fastest home connection any but a few tech executives had; now, my 56K is about minimum for internet functionality, and is MUCH slower than average, and CRAWLS relative to what your normal bloke on the street corner COULD pay for.
And yet I've gotten spoiled. Now I only want MPEGs. I used to be delighted with Playboy centerfold type photos on the 'net, and now I want money shots in forty-second clips from spermshack.com and the like. My connection has gained only about 50%, but my appetite has increased twentyfold, from a satisfaction with a 100K image, to a desperation for a 2MB movie.
As well, I've honed my tastes. I no longer like just the old average cheesecake shot, some corn-fed pretty American girl showing off her breasts in front of a photographer's backdrop. No, I want a very beautiful woman, with slender arms and no flab on her ass, with naturally bouncy titties (I don't actually care if they ARE fake, but they better not LOOK fake), I prefer more Caucasian-looking features (and if you can find a chick who has the shape of those features, but with darker olive, Asian, or African skin and almond-shaped eyes, I'm in heaven), and I want her using her hands and mouth to jack off some dude so he cums on her face, and I want her to really act like she likes it, and I want him to shut the fuck up while she coos and murmurs, and I want eye-contact from her during the act, and I want (if I can get it) multiple men to multiply ejaculate on her, and I want to be able to see her perky tits the whole time that this act is consummated. And if I can't get all of that then I'm pretty much disappointed and I move on to the next file and download IT.
I mean, who the fuck reprogrammed me with all these specifics?
In fact, last night before I went out to a local dance club, I decided to try a few experiments. While I was getting ready to go out, showering and shaving and finishing the laundry and all that crap, I booted up the computer, linked to my favorite clearing house of free cumshot porn, and connected to several MPEG files and started them downloading. Usually I can't download more than four or five in an hour (dial-up, as I said), which limits what I end up wanting to keep here on my home computer, and prevents me from seeing more than two or three hot women in action. But this was a bigger plan. I was going to smack them into a folder on my hard drive and then watch them in a BLISTERING FURY of porn experience, all at once, no download delays.
Well, I got hot for one or two of the chicks. They were doing the trick, these moving images. Often I used to whack off while downloading, but oddly I wasn't inspired to do that. I somehow needed the ACT OF DOWNLOADING to get me REALLY going, to the point where I'd drop my shorts and fish the lube out of the drawer. Since I wasn't watching the little progress dialog climb from 0% to 30, 60, 90, 100%!!!, I was dulled out by the whole process. It was just a set of images on my computer, no more exciting than a Playboy magazine happens to be. (By the way, the previous tenant of the apartment I just moved into had subscribed to Playboy, and I got a few of his in my first few months here. The writing was pretty good, and the pictures were pretty exciting, too. Maybe I'll go back to the print media?) And then after I went out last night, crashed and burned at the pick-up-the-civilian-girlies game (jeez, they can hammer your self-esteem, can't they?), finished the night at a strip club, had some rigorous lap-dances that really got me horned up with no place to go (you can grope, as long as the clothes stay on, here in this small Southern capitol city), and then couldn't find a massage pull-off joint open that late ... well, you'd think I'd be happy to have this new and exciting set of porn on my computer, right?
No. I didn't even want to look at it. It looked garish, and too easy. Somehow, there was no challenge. I wasn't titillated by the act of downloading it painstakingly slowly, having something to distract me as I constantly swapped windows to check the progress of this file or that, having something else to have to anticipate. And I wasn't experiencing the MPEGs as brand-new. I had seen them.
Once, only once. I had watched each forty-second (or shorter) movie-clip JUST ONCE before going out. And yet that was enough to inure me to them.
Am I doomed for life? Has internet porn prevented me from ever having a normal relationship with printed or digitized media, much less with real human females? And isn't the whole download-hotness thing strange? Do other guys have that same association, between getting horny and seeing the progress bar climb from 0%, 30, 60, 90, to
argh, I just splattered the keyboard.
Kidding, kidding ...
