First watch this JAL 747 do a crosswind landing at Hong Kong's old Kai Tak.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OtnL4KYVtDE&feature=related

Then watch this KAL 747 attempt to do the same.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V4gRNpU-5Qk&feature=related

I'm sure the JAL landing stained a lot of shorts; but the KAL landing probably sent everyone to the drycleaners!

That was the scariest airport in the world. I still vividly remember my first landing at Kai Tak. Took me several minutes to stop shaking and I am by no means a white knuckle flyer.

Was very cloudy and windy day and could see ZERO with the plane bouncing wildly in the dense clouds.You could tell we were on an incredibly steep descent angle. I really started to think we were crashing not landing. Then we suddenly broke thru the cloud base and you saw tall buildings seemingly right in front of the plane and about eye level !! We looped right around the corner of one of the buildings and made the sideways type landing shown on the videos . I had no one warn me about Kai Tak and what to expect on landing.


I kind of miss the excitement now. The new airport is so boring in comparison.

I remember that 45 degree bank at what seemed 500' altitude above the apartment buildings on the approach as being exciting.

It brought you close enough to count the items of laundry on hanging on the veranda of the apartments immediately below.

Equally "fun" was the fully loaded takeoff on humid, hot days at Kai Tak, when before leaving, some passengers were taken off the plane to make weight limits. The 747 would then lumber sloooowwwly down the runway, the wingtips bouncing up and down almost touching the tarmack, with the plane just barely clearing wheels in time.

Of course China Airlines pilots were the most skilled landing at that particular airport. Here was one of their better landings in an almost brand new, factory fresh 747. Just delivered from Boeing 3 months earlier.

http://www.airliners.net/open.file/0180234/M/

Of course it took the opening of the new airport in Hong Kong for China Airlines to really perfect their HKG landing technique. At the old airport this landing would not have been possible without going into the water.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JuoeYaR4MP4
http://aviation-safety.net/photos/displayphoto.php?id=19990822-0&vnr=2&kind=C

That's it, next time I grow up I'm goona be a train engineer! This is too scary for me....

CFK

Laguy,

do you know how much you are fucking things up for me? I was hoping to feel much safer.
I am going to have to give new consideration to everything...[deep sigh]

CFK

CFK,

I feel a small pang of conscience. Hopefully, these will make you feel better.

Laguy,
for a while my feelings of anticipation, anxiety, frustration, and happiness were definitly in a suspended and antimated state.
Now they are just antimated thanks to you.
I am speechless! Apparently those twelve step programs really do work......

CFK

I would think that one of these is probably best for CFK these days.

Cat,

I actually had the original pedal plane when I was a young boy, and I never crashed it! I wish I had it back, they are worth a fortune.
Ah, the High and The Mighty! I really miss logging time in that plane..............

Heres the China Airlines takeoff technique.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21qZPaCRSQI
Flaps? We don't need no stinking fraps.
Good thing theres a tiny section missing out of that fence.

I think after flying for 37 years and logging 25,000 hours, without killing anybody, no accidents, and no violations, not to mention all your butts I've had onboard and hauled to Rio, you should all throw a festa for me [FREE] and I get to go first with each and every girl! I want 90% blondes too, and Hemp can cum AFTER I do.
See Hemp, I am sharing afterall............Laguy can wear a lifevest and cool sunglasses and handle the general needs of the guests between trysts, and GCL will be in charge of the famous sex chair. Of course Jag will hand out cigars for anyone needing a smoke break; Cat will be monitoring the door keeping any and all rif-raff out! Diversity will collect and hold cell phones and take calls, no one wants to miss a call or opportunity to tell the boyfriend they are off the program do they? Blissman, you will be in charge of writing up the event so it can later be posted for those that can't attend. If your name/handle is not listed please don't feel bad, you can just come and enjoy and with no duties assigned. BrasilSpecialts will be doing the photo shoots, wallet and 8x10 glossies available. BluesTravel can do the videos. Anijo, you can't come because you will tell the Garota to do weird things, maybe next time. OK-start working on it.......
CFK

Sounds good, lets call up your ex and see if she can provide your apartment as the venue. How many bedrooms does it have?

I believe it already has a turnstyle in the entryway in lieu of a front door, that will help me in my doorman's job.

Cat,

you're always looking out for me [OUCH]....
Problem is the Condo/Apt is in Santos, near the water of course with a lovely view, oops I digress.
We could have the whole family, Mom, and her two sisters help out I suppose. Maybe have Lucy and her Mom attend also and make it a hell of a "family style" festa...
If the turnstyle has been installed you will be given another position: Condom Boy, I think you know what that involves!

CFK

(baleful look on face) Scribe? That's all I get to do after all I have done to get people through the air safely???

Air travel. It's all about the freezepoint.

Ok, ok. I will serve as scribe for the event. At least it beats Cato's reassignment.

With the collection of senior citizens at this festa - I think I'm the only one not on the AARP roster or close to it - that was mentioned in the invite. You better have a Viagra Station attendent in there as well or you won't have to even have a Condom Sommelier.

Cat,

The AARP recognizes the post of Viagra Station attendant as the highest and most sought after.
In a fitting tribute the theme of the festa will be: The Old Men and the Seed
Ok, Bliss, you can man the jump-start machine, just in case. This does not relieve your duties of reporting.

CFK

Hey; There is a new airline out there. Big Balls Airlines.

http://www.yourfilehost.com/media.php?cat=video&file=08060204_bigballs_airlines.wmv

RG.

Roadglide,

I can only imagine what the flight physical over there would involve. Damn, the're tough enough already!

CFK thanks for sharing but I have a problem with CUMMING after you and I guarantee there will be no kissing. Please let Anijo attend, I like a little wierd as long as she wears boxing gloves. I'll have the tatoo by then "exit only". By the way great idea GCL and the sex chair! We need more for Cat to do. -

Hemp, Cat will be so busy with newbies he won't have time for anything else, you know how he is!
He gives the term "Task Master" a whole new meaning.
I hope I live long enough to see him become a Father! [God forbid]

CFK could you imagine CAT a father and having triplet sons. Oh my god!

HEMP,

he could name one after you, me and Jag-the 3 Wise men!

CFK

If I had kids and they started acting like any of you three retards I would smother them immediately.

Cat, to quote thee:

Another example of natural selection at work


CFK

Time to reclaim this thread from all the meaningless pitter patter and get it back on topic.

Here's a dinger. Landing in a severe cross wind, a massive gust sends a wing into the runway, then the other hits on the compensation. The pilots abort the landing and gun it off the runway.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/europe/article3478681.ece

If there had been a hickory nut between the throttle and the firewall I bet it would have been squashed flatter than 80 year-old tit in a mammagram press.

>>squashed flatter than [an] 80 year-old tit in a mammagram press.<<

Where have I heard that expression before? Was it Jim Rockford on the Rockford Files, or maybe homesy Dan Rather on the evening news?

Just wondering.

Muraski,

..."Time to reclaim this thread from all the meaningless pitter patter and get it back on topic."
Well, after flying for 37 yrs and with the airlines 30 yrs and 25,000 hours I can tgell yhou this: those guys are fuckin cowboys, not heros! They either (if x wind in limits0 did a piss poor job of xwind landing techniques or(if xc excedded the limits) shuld not have attempted the landing- PERIOD!

Additionally, if you or anyone knew how to fly an airplane you would recognise that if thay were to drag any wing it should have been the right wing! For heavens sake, figure it out!

Laguy,
it was probably the 80yr old you mistook for a 50yr old!

Um, where did I ever say they were heroes or did a good job? This video just qualified for this thread by giving passengers brown shorts.

Besides, I thought you're not supposed to drag any wings at all!

Sure, dragging wings is okay, so long as it's only one wing at a time!

Jag

The only think that should be dragging is the flight attendants ass AFTER you've nailed it. Nothing, repeat nothing, else should ever be dragged, pushed, pulled, ductaped, scraped, scratched, or bent.

>>The only think that should be dragging is the flight attendants ass AFTER you've nailed it.<<

Are you talking about the blue-haired over-the-hill flight attendants on US-based airlines, or the gay ones? Inquiring minds want to know.

Then again, I suppose there is an off-chance you're talking about Singapore Airlines female flight attendants, in which case I can "get behind" the sentiment.

Goddammmit LAGuy! I am busted. How in the hell did you ever figure out that I am Dan Rather?

Laguy,

...."the blue-haired over-the-hill flight attendants"
THAT, is a violation of the Guy Code!
In the good ole days we had nothing but cute and attractive ones, which over the yrs attrition, marriage, and of course the EEOC has all but wiped out. Finding a hot one on a US carrier is about like finding an honest GDP.....

[Bliss is really Colonel Sanders]

The world's scariest runways.... Not videos, but pictures:

http://www.travelandleisure.com/articles/the-worlds-scariest-runways/1

Go to #6, Lesotho. If that won't scare the shit out of you on takeoff, nothing will.

Check out Baguio Airport. I was still in amazement that there was a cliff on essentially both sides of this airport.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/storm-crypt/2313294621/

(Message edited by xenono on August 13, 2009)

At least that runway is 5900 feet long. Cakewalk!