This may be useful in determining how much longer you've got to play

http://moneycentral.msn.com/investor/calcs/n_expect/main.asp

Thanks CFK - "I am fucked" I will leave all my blondes to you buddy. - Hemp

Hemp,
I was thinking of you while entering my data into the equation. Apparently I will expire at 85

I think you have more predicted longevity than a few guys that come to mind

CFK

(Message edited by copperfieldkid on November 23, 2008)

CFK, you really made my day with this gem. I just found out that I have been dead for over 5 years.

Fuck me !! It said I would live until age 97. I can just see myself shuffling into Dollhouse pushing my walker. I better hope my 401 K comes back from the dead.

Thanks CFK, you made my fucking day. Aren't you just a fucking bright spot in my day. Oh well, at least I wont have to worry about fucking old ladies at the old folks home. I wont make it that long.

Pretty kewl - 75 is longer then I expected.

Hmmm, no category for how many third world hookers you have barebacked or how many 80 mile per hour motorcycle taxi rides through heavy traffic you have taken. This thing can't be accurate leaving out so many common risk factors.

At least I hope it isn't accurate, since it says I won't live to see 50.

Shit. When I lied about my past traffic tickets, my life expectancy jumped up from 72 to 88. Guess I'll keep driving like a maniac because I don't want to live that long.

Jag

Man! I got 98 years (36 more), and was close to the truth on everything (including my recently changed diet). My biggest negatives were cholesterol and gender (!)--I'll can only try to change one of those (but what's the point--this doesn't tell you what kind of shape you'll be in, or whether your brain function will make it to that age).

KM, I'll will you my walker. It'll have a built-in phone with lots of fresh numbers (not that YOU'LL need them), and be convertible into a piece of age-appropriate sex furniture.

Bluelight,

You nearly got keel-hauled just going to Foz do Iguacu. Did you factor that into your equation

I agree with Sancho. Bareback anal with termas garotas, thousands of blowjobs from thousands of mouths, eating food at Bob's, sitting near Diversity after he's pissed off a favela homecoming queen GdP, walking down Djalma Ulrich at night - we really need a monger's edition of the life expectancy calculator.

As for AZGuy, here's a funny story - Giblet and I were sitting in the boite at S with him back in September, and we mentioned how we tend to go sem comesinha on a selective basis. He mentioned how crazy this was, but apparently our powers of persuasion were effective because he admitted to us in the taxi afterwords to barebacking "a little" with his garota in the cabine.

Sure, a couple of days later he's taking more antibiotics and remedies than Howard Hughes after taking a shit, but I feel confident that with another couple of Rio trips under his belt, he'll come over to the dark side of mongering for good . Let's see you plug that into the life expectancy tool.

Mine went to 77, who wants to be 77? I want my kids to whack me out when I'm 60...

Cat, so much for what happens in Rio, stays in Rio.

I doubt I will make a habit of it, but I have to say, I cant imagine the "non-pros" I have been with in the states over the years get checked out a fraction of the times these termas girls do. Am I justifying now? ok so maybe I am justifying.

PS I am good with 70 something. It should still work then, right? Is that right CFK?

Jonesie, you can have plenty of life after 60, even if you discount half of what CFK says. Just keep your testosterone levels up, and stop smoking while you're still young.

Hey, no one said getting old would be easy, and it's certainly not for sissys. I would offer the following to several of you that responded.

Just to "comfort" some of you:

Hemp, your health insurance premiums are finally going to pay off.

Bliss, when you take a nap do people worry that you're dead and start CPR?

Khun_mor, if you live that long there will be nothing left to learn the hard way.

Azguy, just wait until you start looking like your driver's license picture.

Bluelight, great attitude, then you can simply look forward to dull and uneventful days and nights.

I Am Sancho, well at least you will have your act together without your body falling apart.

Jag, you'll get Mallzheimer's disease. You go to the mall and forget what
appliances you were going to purchase.

Hunterman, apparently you will outlive us all. Unfortunately your little black book
will only contain names ending in M.D!

Cat, you will ALWAYS be able to get into heated arguments about pension plans, Medicare costs, and Social Security benefits, not to mention the rising cost of AARP membership fees.

Jonesie, just wait, eventually you'll be content to smoke one of those Cubans, remembering the day your semi-annual erection became an annual semi-erection!

The only thing I know is life is what you make it! Death is NOT an option.

CFK

(Message edited by copperfieldkid on November 25, 2008)

(Message edited by copperfieldkid on November 25, 2008)

CFK, you asked if anyone tries to give me CPR when I take a nap. Only in Luomo and it just happened 2 or 3 times.

Bliss, I can't think of a better place than Luomos for CPR. Why? because if it works your fucked, and if it doesn't your fucked! Either way you're just plain fucked.

CFK

CFK, thank you very much, I leave for Rio in 8 days and I just found out from your fucken stupid post that I have 5 days to live...FUCK YOU!

Latinalover,

as you know timing is everything, try and hold on and not make a grave mistake

CFK
P.S.Change some of the info so you can at least make it thru the trip

How did everyone else do? It certainly would be interesting to see the opinions of the "ideal" age to check out
Obviously quality of life, etc, but just how long do you really want to live?

Maybe we should start a thread on what's on your Bucket List?

BTY: Longevity in America increased from an average 47 years in 1900 to 77 years in 2000. Jonesie, you are a shining example!

I re-entered information in the quiz and admitted to knowing Latinalover and Diversity and LOST 3 years!!

It's a good thing you didn't enter Hemp, GCL, LaGuy, Cat and some of the others or we would be attending a funeral? - CFK don't fuck around with that anymore or who would we have to poke fun at? - Thanks Hemp

And whatever you do don't tell them you know Jag or it is all over!!!!!!

Do they deduct years for spending all day every day sitting on one's ass answering mindless questionaires?

Apparently not, since if they did CFK would be a dead man by now!

I've been outside for 10 hours re-doing my outdoor sprinkler system! I personally just took another year off my life playing in the water and mud. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of charm and personality to burn off. Sunburned, tired, and not even hungry or horney. See what you guys missed!!

(Message edited by copperfieldkid on June 09, 2009)

Hell, I've got 7 years to go. Better buy more Viagra.

Ecjuan,

I'm sorry to hear the tragic news. Take some viagra laced with prozac, that way if it doesn't work, you wont give a damn.

I just re-entered new info, a few changes, and I gained 5 years

CFK - great to here the good news! I re-entered my info also and after my physical and stress test last week and telling the Doctor about my life style, Hot Tub Parties, young Chicas, etc. I was told 2010 might not be the best year for you Hemp? Based on that consultation I think I need to increase the Fiestas and Hot Tub Parties and get in all I can while I can??? - Hemp

So, did you lie the 1st time you entered your data, or the 2nd time?

MM

I'm shocked you would even think that, I merely fine tuned my information. - CFK

(Message edited by copperfieldkid on November 15, 2009)

Hemp - I bet it was the same Doctor that told you condoms cause wrinkles. Look, if your chicken's getting fried, it's from your own doing.

One wordMODERATION

CFK

You are right Dr. CFK - from now on only 2 Hot Tub Parties a week and 3 Chicas and I am cutting back on my smokes to 3 packs a day. Geeezzzz Dr. CFK I feel better already. - Thanks for the advice. Hemp

I decided to input some facts about Charlie Sheen into the Life Expectancy Calculator; he should have died 8 years ago with his lifestyle. He's definitely winning!

[For those joining the thread see first post to access the calculator]