Originally posted by Defconsul in his trip report 2005/02 Defconsul - Quien Vives? Nicaragua, Jan 2005

27 de Mayo -

One night I was at Hippos (a trendy restaurant in the Los Robles section of Managua) my traveling buddy was still sleeping at 11:00 PM from his first day's workout. I was nursing not a hangover, but a severe headache. I resigned that I would call it a night and have some coffee and a sandwich. Three Nico borrachos were drinking the night away, and they invited me to their table when they noticed I didn't have a lighter. We all work in the same industry and my spanish was good, so we hit it off immediately. One of the guys wants to take me to 27 de Mayo and I accept. Guys, this is gringo-zero in Managua. If you thought your life was in danger at Polanco, I assure you that Polanco is Disneyworld compared to 27 de Mayo. Cool thing about Nicos when they are drunk is if they like you, you're money is no good! So we are both shitfaced, but he more than I. The girl with me was ordering doubles, which was cool, because my money was no good here ;-> I don't know if she was the most stupid of God's creatures, but she offered her drink, asking me if I liked the taste. "It's soda!" I exclaimed. I guess it didn't register with my new Nico friend, so I said with a little more conviction "We are paying double for doubles of nothing!?" He had a mouth full of Flor de Cana, and when he heard me say that, He gushed is all out, all over the girls at the table, and then yelled "Joo are fuckeeeen trying to ripoff friend!?!? (I guess he forgot he was paying) Jooooo fuckeeeeen putas!!! The place came to a standstill, like EF Hutton was talking, and the three girls at our table got up and dumped their drinks on him, he leaped at one of them, and I dove on him to keep him away from her and we fell to the floor. With no more drinks to throw at us, they start punching me and hitting me with a chair (they were after him, but I was in the way, holding him down). Oh shit, here come the bouncers! As fast as it started, they subdued the girls (not us) and kicked them out. They apologized to us profusely, and the whole place erupted in laughter and applause as we got up and dusted ourselves off. What's wrong with this picture? We were the ones that were supposed to get whacked on side of the hill, after being hauled off by the bouncers! Well, it turned out that my new Nico friend was Bolanos' nephew and everyoine there knew who he was - my money was no good there because his money was no good there! Three more girls come to us, waiters, manager apologizing, and man, my back and ribs are hurting. I go to the back with a prize looker. I offered her $20.00, but she refused. If you laugh at Fear Factor, scratch your head wondering what's so hard about The Amazing Race, and can stand all the drama and the pain that comes along with it, this place has the best lookers I've seen in Nicaragua so far. They are not dolled up Playboy/Vale Todo style, they are just simply the best looking companeras in the barrio, out having a good time.