DAMN. I didn't get any response from Turk regarding 'Gilda'. I guess the online bridal registry is a moot point now.
Turk, I've made a matching set of macrame bedspread and curtains for Gilda and me. I'd like to donate to you and your girlfriend to feather your lovenest.

I wonder if Gilda appreciates being pimped on a website created for whoremongers? Of all the places to go searching for stable relationship material!!! This is just too fucking funny. I can only assume that this whole escapade is a big goof on Turk's part, because this could NOT POSSIBLY BE SERIOUS!

Turk, before you sign off the thread is there any truth to the rumour that her real name is Claudia but she changed it to Gilda because it was her favourite currency. Apparently she used to have lots of Dutch customers.

Guys, I started to respond to Turks ridiculous post 3 times, then thought better of it. I decided to see if someone else was going to step up. Well...you have done a marvelous job. I literally laughed out loud reading these responses.

Turk...who are you? Is it you Deeg? I cant believe a human would be this stupid. It has to be a goof.

GCL, you are my favorite puto on this forum. You know what a puto is. That is what the garotas probably think of you after you have pay them. You are not only disgusting, but not worthy of Gilda. I am glad you exposed your true self.

Bwana Dik, your only activity and reason for being, from what I have seen is go go to Rio and rush back to your computer and post your latest escapades. Since you are such a big stud. Why don't you post pics of yourself in action. You have it all wrong about Gilda, I am not pimping her, especially to a slob like you. I think you belong in the terma, that seems to suit you very well.

The rest of you hombres, should learn not to hang around with guys like GCL and Bwana dik. Bad example for society.

Turk, we finally agree.

Amazing personal insights Turk. GCL & Bwana, forgive me, but I must agree with Turk here; you two spend far too much time and money in termas. The both of you disgust me.

Hemp? I trust you're listening to Turk? When you move to Rio, you'll need to avoid these two characters like the plague. Avoid Copacabana too. Get a nice apartment 30 minutes inland. Go to coffee shops and markets to meet nice girls. And most importantly - only date women your own age! lest you too should be seen as a lecherous gringo.

Having identified GCL and Bwana as pubic enemies #1 & 2 Turk, who's next? I suggest Mitch and Layne. Bad men. Very very bad.

Okay hombres. I have been skeptical about this Turk guy for some time and have been wondering who this guy really is. NO-ONE could be posting his nonsense in seriousness, just like the fictional character "Kid Cisco" (of a previous life) could not have been. Do we go with Kid Cisco, or is it one of the Brazilian guys trying to amuse himself? Inquiring minds want to know. GCL, what do you think?

LA Guy,

I have been watching this thread and thinking to myself. Oh No! Another Kid Cisco fiasco. Maybe I need to post again.

Turk,

I don't know you, but let me introduce myself. I live in Rio and I have met many of the people that you are now insulting. I haven't been posting on this board a lot, because indeed, I have a namorada too.

Of course, now that I have am exclusive, I no longer visit the termas. For me it is a mixed bag. I miss hanging out with the guys, and also the variety of women. OTOH, I am truly enjoying getting to know someone on more than just a physical level. Plus, as you note, when you are in a good relationship, the sex is much better than terma sex.

So that's my take. But here's another comment. Dude, Wake Up! This is a mongering board! What could you possibly have to gain by preaching anti mongering sentiments here? And then, you try to "hawk" a regular girl here? Your attitude really defies logic.

LAGuy...I swear Turk isnt me. You arent the only one to think so. I honestly thought it was DonGringo. THen it dawned on me... he might be the return of Andy Kaufman.

It's not me either, and I've had a few Hombres ask! The Turk handle has been around for a while and there was once a link to a yahoo group or something where some pics were posted. All I know is, I have run into guys like Turk (or the Turk persona) and they are out there. All I know is, the shit is funny to read!

DeeG don't worry about me and the age of the women. I have morals and wound not anyway DO a Garota over the age of 25. Anything over that would totally disgust me? And thank god GCL doesn't like blondes. 24 days left to I arrive in my new home RIO. - Thanks Hemp

Hemp,
On my last trip I actually witnessed GCL going to a cabine with a blond. Then on a tour of downtown budget establishments, he recommended another blond which he told me he had personally test driven. Just shows that nothing is sacred, especially in GCL's world.
CG

Okay, I do blondes again. I took a couple of years off...is that wrong?

Right now I am not doing midgets. Nothing against them, just not doing them. But who knows what the future holds.

Well I feel safe, for now.
CG

I'm still waiting for GCL to do a beautiful garota ... with ugly feet. More than anything else, that would reaffirm his alleged claim to normalcy

GCL

I agree with Turk that you are both disgusting and not worthy of Gilda. Why he didn’t include degenerate is a mystery to me.

I find those to be your best qualities and because of aforementioned qualities I consider your comments and your advice sound.

But having been seen with a blond??? This is not good. Whats next? Doing a garota before inspecting her feet for deformities? Before this thing gets out of hand you should search out a good 12 step group such as DABA anonymous ( doing a blond on the sly anonymous) or better yet seek out professional help. Try 1sta blondthengilda.com. But hurry before its too late.

GCL:

No midgets? You're limiting yourself too much. IMHO, there's nothing like a quadruple-amputee midget... sit-and-spin.... wheee! And you should see the look on their faces...

Speaking of which, Turk has gone on and on about Gilda's age and marriageable qualities, but not one word on height. How tall is she? If below 4'6", we may have a deal!

Abraco,

BS

You have no idea how sick it makes me to hear GCL is doing blondes again. I don't have a problem with Brunettes or hell even Midgets but stay away please from my Blondes. I am very concerned about the state of mind GCL has been going thru lately. Constant Nutting /Stress /Frequent Sessioning / Daily Diaries - Midgets - Foot Fetishes??? Is there a DR. in the house? - I don't even know why I worry about the guy because I do dislike him so very much. - Hemp

I think it's just some side effects of the dengue fever, that's all. I doubt that there are too many blondes in his future. Of course, if I ever log into his site and see a bunch of blondes in the cabini, that's when we know there's a long-term problem.

Wait a moment here. Deeg, where did GCL allege he is normal? If he is normal, we are a bunch of flippin freaks. Ok, we are a bunch of flippin freaks, but doing a blond or two does not make you normal.
CG

(Message edited by cortogringo on May 14, 2004)

CG
GCL's silence is deafening.
Right now, he could be ANYWHERE, doing ANYTHING with ANYONE. Thanks to Xanax, Prozac and a recently poured stiff shot of Havana Club, my imagination has finally come to rest. Let's just assume he IS in fact normal, and at the gym, shall we?
DG

Hey guys, I am booked for my first vacation in over a year!!!

I leave Rio on Sunday the 16th, connect from Houston to Minneapolis, and then onto Rapid City. I cant decide whether to bus it or take a rental car from there to Badlands National Park. ALso, does anyone know of a girl friendly hotel in the area?

You guys have no idea how good this feels to finally get to take off an do something cool for myself. I will try to post daily reports if I can but not sure if there are internet cafes in the area or if the hotel has internet access.

It's an honor to be lumped into the same category as GCL. Turk, you've made my day! BTW, what does Gilda charge for a session? And has Mitch ever done her? Because if he has I won't.

BT, good to hear your "voice" again. I missed you on the last trip, but even if you'd been around I guess I would have missed you, since when I wasn't debauching sweet, young innocents I was at the internet cafe posting my exploits.

Yeah, pretty odd guy, this turkish one. My first thought of this guy about a year ago is "who-in-the-fuck is going to post a (apparently) true picture of himself and his girl on a board such as this? Think of Elmer Fudd/Mr Magoo meets plain-stainy-jane. Discretion is certainly not a part of his creed.

BD,

I just got in today. Should be here for the next three months. Give me a shout to play some guitar or catch a meal.

BT

BT,
If I make it back I'll be sure to call.
BD

To the Hombres,

I can assure you that it was never my intent to conduct a sweepstakes for Gilda. Perhaps I was a bit naive, trusting that the Hombres here would show some honor and decency.

What I don't appreciate, and I am sure you would not either, is having Gilda and Cristiane, my Brasileira girlfriend, become the topic of insult and degration.

I never insulted you unless you deserved, and I have had to take the plastic bag and broom handle to several of you.

It appears that I have created a whole new forum where hombres can enjoy taking pot shots at just regular guys who are looking for a relatonship rather than an all-out assault at every terma, disco and beach whore that passes by.

I don't really care what you do with your time while in Rio, fuck yourselves to death until you're bodily fluids are completely drained from your bodies and you are brain dead.

I don't really care about the remarks made at me, but when you cross that line in the sand and insult my girlfriend and her friends, and then make my business your business, then I have no choice, but to respond in kind.

The title of this forum is RELACIONMENTO SERIO (Serious Relatonships) not BASH TURK, okay?
I must say that never did I imagine that there are truly dispicable people on this planet. Many of them live right here in ClubHombre.Com.

I have just learned from Cristiane that one lucky hombre, a chemical salesman for a Fortune 500 company with offices in Sao Paulo, is scheduled to meet Gilda is weekend, and I am really hopeful things work out.

You see guys, there are hombres of honor and decency on Club Hombre. It is a shame that a few bad apples has given this forum such a bad reputation, at least from my point of view.

Sincerely,



Turk

Turk; Can you please let us know what you are smoking? It's obviously some pretty good shit.

He could have just let it all die.... But NO.

Turk can you explain what taking a plastic bag and broom handle to someone means exactly?

GLC - You really expect us to believe that you're unfamiliar with this?

I'd eaten some bad sushi that day. While visiting GCL at his office (back when we were still speaking to each other), my bowels were seeking immediate relief. Dancing the rawfish shuffle into GCL's bathroom, I found only 3 sheets of toilet tissue beside the commode. While rezipping and dashing out to the janitors closet for more paper, I completely forgot to knock. This visual image has scarred my retinas for life.

GCL and the maid.

One wasn't dressed, while the other administered a sound 'Turking' with the aforementioned equipment.

FORTUNATELY (for the maid), I was able to maintain sufficient control long enough to return to the bathroom before spewing from BOTH ends.

A "Turking". Not until now did I know I had administered one.

A "Turking". Not until now did I know I had administered one.

If my traumatized psyche recalls correctly GCL, you were the Turk-ee.

I tried to let you off the hook on this one, but the above bold faced lie forced me to reveal the truth.

Has anyone met Turk ?
Is he a tuff guy or a wimpy monger? No offense Turk but I meet many guys here in Mexico that think they have beautiful mexican girlfriends only to find out that the hundreds he sends her a month is going to her tuff guy boyfriend.

And I meet these guys and they look worse than a car wreck and they expect some 19 year old hottie to be true to him and love him for him.

Its tuff but thats life, si?

OK, I think I understand the broom thing, but what is the plastic bag for? Preventing splinters? What exactly is the correct procedure for administering a "turking"? Do the garotas like it, or is this just some weird GCL fetish?

What a coincidence. It's Roadglide and GCL. I have a feeling GCL stands for Gringo Can't Get Laid without paying for it. Roadglide I have a feeling you are biker. Am I right?? WIth those funny leather leggings. How nice.

Why is it that the two of you hang around together? You follow each other like a bunch of ants. Must be the you two hombres have something going on and trying to keep it secret from the rest of us hombres. Hee. hee.

I thought I would provide you some prazer:

http://www.craigslist.org/eby/ers/31885074.html

Enjoy it while you can.

Was I just given the plastic bag or the broom handle?

Miss CraigsList looks like she could give you either one, with muito prazer, and for a very unreasonable price (note that your real buys fewer dollars these days).

You're amusing Turk. You fail to realize that many of us do support guys seeking relationships. A friend of mine is married here in the US with a girl he met overseas. I also know others here that are in relationships. They get along fine with other members of this site.

Of course, the guys we support are not as naive or as pompous as you. Your claim to be respectful is a complete lie which is easily exposed by simply scrolling up in this thread but can also be confirmed by other posts of yours.

Not that you would be honest with Gilda or Cristiane, either. Did you tell then yet that you were advertising Gilda on a website whose purpose is the discussion of prostitution in other countries? Don't forget to tell them so they can thank you for your honor and decency.

I think most of us are supportive of guys that guys that settle on a single girl as long as they respect what this forum is about and don't relate to the majority here in a condescending manner.

D'art,

I guess the ad on Craigslist didn't get the job done, so he had to advertise her here as well

Turk are you a male gold digger? It sounds like you are trying to set up this guy just to rip him off. In almost every post you have included something about money.

True most of us on this board are financially secure "read comfortable" otherwise we would not be able to travel the world.

That does not mean that we are not able to see thru your little scam. I can only hope that your fortune 500 salesman can and should if he is part of this board.

I'm just glad my bullshit story about being a chemical salesman still works, but on a serious note, in the words of our dear departed master of the obvious, WestFargo, if Gilda doesn't let me do bareback anal, "I dwont pay!"

I'll post a report about my meeting with Gilda and the dupla with her amiga (I'm sure it's not your namorada, Turk) later this week.

Turk5555,

I know how difficult it must be being mocked by the likes of GCL and his compatriots. Many of us think you are a real cool guy, and would really like to know more about you. I understand you previously posted some pictures of you and your girlfriend on this website, but unfortunately the links to those pictures no longer exist. Turk, and I am saying this as a friend, please post those pics again so we can all get to know you better.

My Fellow Hombres,

This topic is strictly for relacionmentos serios. If you speak any Portuguese at all, you will figure out what that means on your own. Those of you who have stories to tell about your relationships with Brasileiras are welcome to post them.

The rest of you mongers, who apparently have only one thing on your mind, which is to mock me, insult my Brasileira girlfriends and her friends, and post your whorehouse exploits, think it is funny, I have no use for you.

If you want to see pics of me, I really find that flattering. Why don't you post pictures of yourselves, so we know what YOU look like. You won't because you are probably too ugly and nothing but a monger. In short you have to pay for sex because no self-respecting garota would have sex with you without payment, hopefully if she is smart, collected in advance all in cash.

Sha Ching, Sha Ching. That's the sound of the terma cash register.

I fucked a Chinese chick named Sha Ching, about seven years ago, I think.

Yes, Turk 5555, you hit the nail on the head. It is so dreadful living this life of extreme ugliness and grotesqueness. Indeed, when I viewed the movie "The Elephant Man," all I could think was "but oh, why couldn't I be as pretty as he." But no, instead I have had to live this horrible life of mongering, and, in your own words, "Sha Ching, Sha Ching." But have you no mercy on us uglies, who were not blessed with the blessings that have been bestowed upon you? Oh, how I would just love to be so pretty as to be able to fuck Gilda in the ass without having to pay. But not, it shall never be. Life is so unjust.

Cat. I gotta go with Turk on this one (Fair and Balanced approach). You probably had to pay Sha Ching to fuck her. You loser.

Turkey:

Believe it or not, you don't OWN this topic, nor any other, so forget about telling guys what tehy can or can't post. In fact, this thread was started by Hombre as a way of breaking off the whole Gilda disussion from another, termas-related thread. If the discussion has drifted away from the wonderful, good luck that we've beeen granted to have the opportunity to meet Gilda, it's your own fault.

Previously, I stuck up for you due to bald-guy solidarity. However, in protest I am now once again growing hair, soon it will be down to my ass, as a tribute to you. Rarely have I met as pompous an ass as yourself, thank the mongering gods that I only know you eletronically, not in person. Speaking just for myself, please don't call me your "Fellow Hombre."

BS

(Message edited by moderatorB on May 24, 2004)

GCL and LA guy

I think you guys nailed this one. And Turkey55 has me figured out as well. All I do is think of how I can be more like him. His statement that he has no use for people like me really cut to the bone. I'll try to give up my mongering ways and settle for a 30+ year old girl like Gilda. Although I've never seen Turkey or Gilda I dream of the day that I might.

Turk is onto something here guys. My last two brazilian girlfriends have both been 30+ years old (ok make that 40+). There is no substitute for experience. Sure the younger girls have

firmer breasts, and

their vaginas can be tighter, oh and

they might not have any wrinkles, and

they have more energy, and

their nubile asses have that perfect crease where their chubby cheek joins their taught thigh, and

their vaginal fluids will generally flow with very little stimulation making the need for lubrication a moot point, and

I could go on and on, but seriously, why would anyone prefer a 18-24 year-old when they could have Gilda for example? or her older sister? I'm behind ya 100% here Turk. Older chicks RULE

DonGringo