Posted by Curious on October 19, 2000 at 19:17:00:
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On my last trip to TJ I drove my work van across the border. It was kind of a spur of the moment trip, so I didn't leave all of my work paraphernalia at home. I hide the more valuable stuff, and some things I had along (like my 35mm camera) I put in my bag and carried with me into the club and hotel (which allowed me to get some pretty decent semi nude pictures, BTW.) No problems until I am heading home. As I am waiting to cross the border in late morning, a customs agent approaches and starts looking at my van. Asks if it is mine, how long I have owned it, do I have the registration, open the hood, etc. Finally he says OK, go ahead. When I hit the border, the guy punches a bunch of stuff into the computer, checks my license plate, and asks more questions. He then sticks a paper on my dash and sends me to secondary inspection. A couple of quick questions once I get there, and they tell me to wait. Now, what is really funny is that sometimes I have bought prescription drugs in Mexico that I have brought back for myself or my friends. On this trip I have nothing - NADA - that is even questionable. The ONLY "incriminating" things I have are some film in my camera of half naked women, and a couple of polaroids taken inside the club - one clearly showing the "Chicago Club" name. These are in a folder with other papers in a little expanding file, where I also have my insurance, registration, etc. An hour later they come over and start taking my van apart. One guy is working on the engine compartment, and two guys are working in the back. I noticed they had kept pounding on the sides of the van like they wanted to hear if it was hollow or not. The interior is paneled and carpeted. At least it WAS. A woman is asking me questions. "You have new tires?" "How long have you owned the van?" "What do you do?" "What else have you had done to the van recently?" (I did a major fix up on it this year, after deciding to fix it up rather than buy a new one - so it is a lot. Engine rebuild, new battery, tires, radiator, redid my parts storage in the back, etc.) They striped the paneling out of the back, took off the door panels, and even a panel under the dash board. And found - aside from a bunch of dust - foam insulation! And about a dollar in lose change. Now, I will admit, they did put most of it back together (although it rattled a LOT on the drive home, and I spent this morning tightening and adding screws to hold the paneling on). All this for no reason I could figure out EXCEPT the ONE thing that has changed. Now, as background - I have driven this same van across the border probably a 100 times. I have been searched entering Mexico quite a few times - but only a couple of times that took more than 5 minutes. I have gone to secondary inspection before, but never had to spend three and a half hours while they tore my van apart. They have never found ANYTHING wrong, BTW. The few times I have had something of questionable status they never even looked at me twice. But this time I had a beard. Yes, that is correct - In the past 2 months I grew a beard, and this is the first time I drove the van across the border sprouting my new look. One gal at the club even said I looked kind of "Mexican". I am guessing that the beard had an impact on the way the border guys looked at me, and that it had something to do with pulling me into secondary. I certainly don't think it had anything to do with the joint I was smoking while in line. (JOKE!!) So, just a word to the wise. Now, where did I leave my razor?? |
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