Posted by strikeeagle on October 26, 2000 at 20:34:03:
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Deuce Bigalow, I'm moving this to the threaded board, as I'm sure that you do not want the discussion of your personal life to be archived. Given your newest revelation about Crystal, combined with your other exposed issues, I'd suggest that you really need to find a professional to work with you. Perhaps a program to work on the addictive personality issues, but Surely you are going to need assistance to deal with your newest 'primate girlfriend'. Damn few people kick that issue alone. As for hitting rock bottom, mi amigo, you're not there yet. Don't kid yourself that you are. You've got a home, and you still have a job, based on what you've written. You still have a life that you can return to if you make the move now. You want to see rock bottom. Take a look at Texas Mike, and you'll see someone far closer than are you. We all make choices. Each member of our community makes choices to pursue this hobby. Every one of us places limits on our activities based on our own decisions. You've made choices to do what you tell us you have done. You also have the ability to make a choice to change the path upon which you tell us you are traveling. But, you need to make the choice with a clear head, and with an objective viewpoint. I'm not sure that you can do that right now. Hell, look at Darryl Strawberry. Months spent clean, yet while still on probation, he goes right back to the crap. Why, because he's chosen the addiction over the life he knows he can have. In many ways, based on what you've written, you are in the same place. By bringing this up on the board, I'm taking it that you're asking for help. In order to gain real help, you should make the decision of what YOU want to do. If you want to keep heading down to TJ, and that's the most important thing in your life, there's not much any of us here can do to stop you. But, if your admissions are honest, and you do want to 'straighten up' your life, take the step and get into a program to address your issues. The hobby might make you broke. The addiction will kill you. Notice that I didn't say 'might'. Eventually, the addiction WILL kill you.
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